Playing House
by Detective Olivia Stabler
Summary: Set just after Paternity. Months after the death of his wife Elliot struggles to hold his family together. Olivia has always said she would do anything for him, now as he faces the threat of losing his kids he asks her for the biggest favor of all.
1. 1 Threatened

_Playing House_

_(Chapter One: Threatened)_

"I said they want to take my kids away," he repeated unsure if Olivia was actually listening.

"I know, I heard you. I just wasn't sure how to respond. Elliot I'm so sorry. There has to be something you can do. You are a good father, why would they take them away from you?"

"It has been hard since Kathy died. It has been hard on us all. Me with work and trying to raise five kids alone. Maureen has taken a year off from school to come home and help out with the baby. Kathleen….she is uncontrollable and she has just gotten worse since she lost her mother. She is out late all of the time and I never know where she is anymore. She hangs around with a troubled group of kids and has been in arrested for shoplifting and drinking. I am afraid to think of all of the stupid things she may have done. The twins used to be honor students and now Dickie is so far behind in school he may not get to go on to the sixth grade. He is starting fights at school and bullying other kids. Elizabeth sits in her room and reads all of the time. She refuses to talk about her mother and wont even say her name. Sometimes I hear her crying at night. And poor little Eli is about to have his first birthday and will never know his mother."

"You have done an amazing job with them, Elliot. They are kids. And when kids hurt, they don't always know how to handle it."

"Well, Kathy's mother and sister don't think I am doing that great. They got a lawyer and are fighting for custody of the four younger kids."

"They would do that? Just take them away from you?"

"They think that I am working too much to be a good father. They said that I don't spend enough time with the kids and they would be better off living with Kathy's sister Kate and her husband Jim."

"As if it isn't enough of a tragedy they had to lose their mother, they want to take the kids away from their father too?"

"She has the means to do it, Liv. I am really in trouble here. Father or not, they can provide things for my kids that I can't even give them. Kate's husband is some fancy doctor. They have a big house in Long Island and a ton of money. The kids would be in a fancy private school with only the best teachers and they could each have their own room. They would never have to go without anything ever again."

"They would be without you! Those kids have already lost their mother, they don't need to lose their father, too! There has to be something that you can do?"

"Yeah, get a good lawyer and pray to God he can beat their guy in court. Casey introduced me to a friend of hers who fights custody battles all of the time, she says he is good. God, I hope she is right."

"El, Casey wouldn't have suggested him if he wasn't. She would do anything to help, we all would."

"I know Liv, I am just so scared. My kids are my life. I don't think that I could live without them. I know my kids would be loved. Jim and Kate would give them everything they ever wanted and needed. They have always wanted children, but Kate can't get pregnant. They have been on a list for years waiting to adopt a baby."

"I guess they decided that stealing your kids was easier," Olivia growled getting defensive.

"My kids deserve the best. And I know that if this did happen it would be good for them. Hell, it may even be better for them. It would be good for them to have two parents. And Kate has said I would still get visitations with them. I guess I am just selfish and don't want to give them up."

"You're not selfish, Elliot. You are a father who loves his children. And you should have the right to raise them."

"But their lawyer is good. He has never lost a case."

"So we find you one who is better. These are your children, Elliot. We cant give up."

"We?"

Olivia stared into his eyes and smiled as she placed her hand in his.

"El, you are my best friend and a damn good father. No one could ever love those kids as much as you do. Those are your kids and they need to be with you. And I will do anything I can to help make sure it works out that way."

"Thanks, Liv. But it may already be too late. We go to court next week. This entire thing is moving so fast. My lawyer says I have a good case, but so do they. He said it is pretty much going to come down to what the judge thinks. There isn't much else I can do."

"You can take the week off and spend it with your kids."

"I used up most of my benefit time when Eli got that double ear infection and Elizabeth had to have her tonsils out."

"Take some of mine. You need this. You and your kids need this. I pray that this fall through and Kate doesn't take the kids. But if she does, Elliot…..you are not an every other weekend and holidays? That just isn't enough. Your kids need you and you need them. So, go and be with them."

"Are you sure? I mean about giving up your time?"

"Of course. I have so much vacation and personal time built up right now that I am probably going to end up losing it anyway. It is best if you can put it to good use. I will talk to Cragen and see if he will approve me to give you a couple of weeks. I am sure he will understand."

"You're amazing, you know that?"

"I want to help, Elliot. Unfortunately, there isn't a whole lot that I can do. At least this way…."

"This helps a lot, Liv. And if there is ever anything that I can do to repay the favor, don't hesitate to ask."

"You should go. Pick the kids up from school and spend the rest of the afternoon with them."

"What about all of this?" he asked pointing to the mound of paperwork on the desk in front of him.

"I will take care of that."


	2. 2 Slip Of The Tongue

_Playing House_

_(Chapter Two: Slip Of The Tongue)_

Olivia sat quietly in the closed courtroom staring down at the floor waiting for the mornings events to begin. Seated beside her were the five Stabler children, each well fed, clean and very neat in appearance. She looked down the bench at the faces of each of the children as they waited nervously for a complete stranger to tell them if they would be taken away from their father.

Olivia pressed her lips together studying the lace detail on Maureen's dress as little Eli sat on her lap. These children had already been through so much over the last few months and Olivia couldn't believe that anyone could possibly think that Elliot was in any way an unfit father. She knew how much he loved his children, they were his entire world and he had gone through hell himself these past months to keep them all together. Now a wealthy aunt and uncle who had very little to do with the children when Kathy was still alive, had the nerve to insist that they would make better parents for the brood.

She raised her eyes to meet Maureen's nervous smile as the girl caught her staring. Olivia smiled back then shifted her eyes forward at Elliot sitting with his lawyer behind a desk in the front of the room. It killed her to know the pain he was feeling right now and to think that this judge could possibly decide that complete strangers were more fit to raise these children than their own father. But what hurt the most was knowing that she would do anything to help the situation and there was absolutely nothing she could do.

Olivia drew a deep breath as the bailiff stood to announce the judge. She watched and rose to her feet, feeling a little out of place as the room of family members stood. On Elliot's side of the room was Olivia and the children. And on the other, Kathy's mother and brothers. At the table in front of them sat Kathy's sister, Kate and her husband, Jim, with their lawyer.

Kate was beautiful. A former high school beauty queen, she was a tall blonde with delicate features. And Jim, a handsome doctor with a seven figure bank account and a Mercedes Benz. Olivia didn't even know these people, yet somehow she hated them. Hated them for even considering separating her best friend from his children.

She watched at the proceedings began and arguments were made. Olivia sat as Jim and Kate's lawyer explained why they would make better guardians than Elliot. She listened nervously as the judge began to explain his decision to send the children to live with their aunt and uncle.

Olivia felt a knot in her throat as she looked over at the disappointed looks on the faces of the Stabler children. Her heart pounded as her eyes met Elliot's only for a moment and she could see the tears on his face. She had to do something, she couldn't let this happen.

"You can't do that," Olivia blurted out standing before she even realized what she had done.

"Excuse me," the judge injected turning his attention to Olivia. "And who are you?"

Olivia's bottom lip quivered as she stared at the judge. She looked over at the children and then back at Elliot.

"Umm…. I'm….um…."

"This is a closed courtroom, ma'am. Only family members are aloud in here! Who are you?" he asked in a demanding tone.

"I am….I'm…." she was in panic mode as her eyes dashed over to Elliot's.

Olivia gulped and felt as if she would vomit, but it was too late to turn back now.

"I am Detective Olivia Benson."

"Exactly why are you here?"

"She's with me," Elliot replied standing up as well.

"She's with you? Who is she? Is she a family member, Mr. Stabler?"

"Sort of."

By the look on the judge's face he was getting very frustrated.

"She's my…." Elliot looked back at Olivia as she fidgeted nervously. "My…."

"Spit it out, Mr. Stabler!"

"His fiancée," Olivia said closing her eyes tight and praying this worked.

"Fiancée? You are engaged, Mr. Stabler?"

"I….I…. I am," Elliot looked at the judge and then back at Olivia wondering what exactly had just happened.

"You didn't see fit to share this information before hand?"

"I'm sorry your honor."

"Well, this changes a few things."

"It does?"

"We will take a thirty minute recess so that I may reconsider the facts. When we resume, I will present my decision."

The judge slammed down his gavel and stood exiting to his chambers.

"Dad, what does that mean?" Maureen asked standing and placing Eli on her hip.

"You and Olivia got engaged?" Kathleen asked. "When did this happen?"

"It means that he has not made a decision yet, honey. I will explain everything later. You stay here with your brothers and sisters. And _you_…." he said looking up at Olivia as her eyes widened, "come with me."

Elliot took Olivia by the arm and lead her toward the hall. Outside he paced the floor as she leaned against the wall trying to think of something to say.

"Elliot, I'm sorry."

"Sorry? Do you have any idea what just went on in there?"

"I know. I wasn't thinking. I was trying to keep the judge from getting angry over me being there. I just spoke….it just came out. I shouldn't have come here Elliot, I'm sorry."

"No, I'm glad you are here." Elliot stopped and leaned in placing one hand against the wall beside her to look her in the eye.

"If we go back in there and tell that judge that I lied to him…. Elliot, I think I just made things so much worse. You're gonna lose the kids and it is all my fault."

"None of this is your fault. He made up his mind before you even spoke. If anything, you may have just given me a second chance."

"Once we tell him that we're not really engaged then he'll take the kids away just because we lied to him."

"What if we don't tell him?"

"El…."

"Hear me out. If he thinks we are engaged….if he thinks there will be two parents….maybe it will buy me a little time."

"Time until what? They are eventually going to figure it out when we never get married."

"Maybe by then I can show him that I can do this. I can show him that I can be a good father. I am a good father."

"You are a good father."

"I just need the chance to make him see that. I can't lose my kids, Liv."

"I know. El, do you really think keeping up this charade will help?"

"He has already decided to take my children away from me, Olivia. What else have I got to lose?"

"Okay," she said softly. "What are you going to tell the kids?"

"I don't know yet. We just have to get through court today."

"I will do whatever you think is best."

"Here we go," Elliot said locking his fingers in hers and taking a deep breath as he lead her back into the courtroom.

Inside they could both feel the eyes of every person in the room on them as he walked her back to her seat. Olivia looked around the room and back at Elliot as he placed a soft kiss on her lips to satisfy the eager eyes staring them down. Olivia, however, hadn't quite been expecting it and looked a bit mortified as he pulled away.

"It's going to be okay," Elliot whispered staring into her eyes as she nodded. "Just a little longer guys," he said to the children as the judge reentered the courtroom.

"Mr. Stabler, I have had a little time to reconsider your status. And while I have no doubt in my mind that you love your children and are an exceptional parent to them, I cannot help but think that maybe Dr. and Mrs. Winters, can provide a few things that maybe you can't at this time."

Elliot felt his heart sink as he turned to look at the sad faces of his children.

"I have decided, rather than awarding the Winter's custody at this time, to do a three month trial. During this time joint custody will be awarded between you, Mr. Stabler and Dr. and Mrs. Winters. The children will be out of school in a week or so?"

"Next week, your honor."

"They will spend the summer living with Dr. and Mrs. Winters. The children will spend every other weekend and holidays with you. You will also be allowed to pick them up one night each week for a visit as long as they are returned at a reasonable hour. You are permitted phone contact with the children as long as they are between the hours of nine o'clock in the morning and nine o'clock in the evening. This agreement is temporary for the time being. We will schedule a second court date for three months from now. This should give you plenty of time to get things in order, Mr. Stabler. During this time you need to work on things like adjusting your scheduled work hours. These children should have a parent with them at all hours of the night. The children will begin court appointed therapy sessions to help them cope with the loss of their mother. I am also looking at notes here and this says that you have been keeping the five children in a four bedroom home?"

"Yes, you honor."

"Mr. Stabler, these children are mostly teenagers, with the exception of your youngest son, of course. I would like to see you provide a more space. Maybe add on a room or two. Or consider finding a bigger residence."

"Yes, sir."

"Are the two of you residing in the same home?"

Elliot looked over at Olivia, then back at the judge.

"No. We were waiting until after the wedding."

"Do you have a date set for the wedding?"

"Not yet. We only recently got engaged."

_Yeah, like forty five minutes ago, _Olivia thought to herself. Exactly what had she gotten them in to?

"These children need two parents, Mr. Stabler."

"They will have two parents. Things have been hard on the kids since they lost their mother. But we're working through this as a family. My kids come first, above everything else. I can't lose my kids. I will do anything you ask me to do, just please don't take my children away from me."

"Mr. Stabler, it is not my intention to remove the children from your custody. My purpose here is to help you to take the steps that need to be taken to insure that this is a safe and healthy environment for these children and then to hopefully return them to your care. Your family has had a few hard times over the last year, I understand that. But these children cannot suffer any longer. Changes need to be made, before I will even consider returning full custody to you."

"Yes, sir."

"This court is not trying to deem you an unfit father. I can see that you love these children and want what is best for them. I think maybe you all as a family may need a little help in seeing what exactly that is. They need structure and parents who are with them more. I am sure these goals will be easier to reach once the two of you are married and can start to make this feel like a two parent family again. I honestly believe the sooner this arrangement is met, the better it will be for these children to begin to settle back into their home life. Will the two of you be married by the next court appearance?"

Elliot looked over at the blank look on Olivia's face as she stared at him. He took a deep breath as she slowly began to nod going along with it.

"Yes, your honor. We plan to be married before then."

"Once the two of you are married and settled under one roof I would like to meet with the attorneys and schedule two weeks during the summer that you and your wife will be able to keep the children. Conditions permitting, of course. Does this work for the two of you?"

"Yes. That would be wonderful."

"Alright. I am giving you two weeks before the children begin their three month stay with Dr. and Mrs. Winters. This will allow them time to finish out the school year in their current school and to spend one week of their summer vacation with you in your home. After that you are to deliver the children to the Winter's residence. Sessions with a court appointed therapist will begin immediately for the entire family. I am ordering individual sessions for each of the older children, for yourself and for you as well, Ms. Benson."

"Me?"

"You do intend to become a part of this family, don't you?"

"I do."

"Then, yes. You, too."

"I am also looking for some effort on the part of the children. I will be requesting that a nightly curfew be enforced as well as an academic tutor and possibly even some summer sessions for those who need them. My goal here is to help secure this entire family as one single unit as well as individuals. It will take commitment from each individual involved, but I hope to see these children back under your roof by the end of the summer, Mr. Stabler."

"Yes, you honor. I think I speak for myself as well as every member of my family here today when I say that we will do whatever it takes to stay together. I just want to keep my family together."

"Court is adjourned," the judge said pounding his gavel once more then standing and leaving the room.

Elliot turned and looked back at Olivia as she pressed her lips together nervously. He studied the looks on each of the faces of his children and could see the questions and worry in their eyes. It was obvious they were in desperate need of a family meeting and had a lot to talk about.


	3. 3 A Place To Belong

_Playing House_

_(Chapter Three: A Place To Belong)_

Olivia__sat at the table across from Elliot stirring her salad with her fork. It had been just over a week since their big day in court and nothing had really been said between them about what had happened, but they both knew there was a very important decision to be made.

Elliot wanted to discuss it with her, but didn't want to make her feel pressured about her choice. He understood that if they didn't go through with the vows and the judge figured out they had both lied in court, he would more than likely lose his children. But he could not let Olivia be forced into something as important as marriage, even if it was to save his family. This had to be her decision.

"You are awfully quiet," he said in an attempt to strike up some sort of conversation. "I guess we have both had a lot on our minds."

"I know what I have to do, Elliot. What we have to do."

"You don't _have_ to do anything. This is my mess and I will figure out a way to work it out."

"El, I just told that judge that you and I are getting married. Then he pretty much told you that once we're married and settled into our house, he will work with us on getting the kids back. We can't not do it. He will take your kids away."

"I don't want you to do this. When you do marry, if you should choose to, it should be for love. Not as a part of an agreement to help me keep my children with me. You deserve all of the happiness in the world, Olivia and I don't want you to sacrifice that for anything."

"It's a small sacrifice to know that I did the right thing. And to know that those kids are with their father where they belong. And who's to say I wouldn't be marrying for love?"

Elliot looked up and stared into her eyes.

"You are my best friend and I love you. Elliot, you are my only family and there isn't anything I wouldn't do for you. I care about you and the kids and I feel that this is the right thing to do."

"It wouldn't bother you to know that your first marriage was one big lie?"

"I think of it more as a little white lie or a business agreement. This is what has to be done for you to keep custody. So this is what we do. It would bother me more if we didn't do it and your family was torn apart. I want to do this."

"We go back to court in three months. Then there will be a probation period where they keep an eye on us for a few months. After all of this dies down, in six months or so we could file for divorce and you can have _your _life back."

"We could just have it annulled."

Elliot laughed softly.

"Liv, no one is going to believe that we were married for six months and didn't sleep together."

"I guess you're right."

"You will be a divorcee."

"And you will still have custody of your kids. I can live with that."

"So how do you want to do this?"

"We could just go to the courthouse and have it done in twenty minutes."

"It is your first marriage. Shouldn't you have an actual wedding with a cake and a white dress?"

"Do you want a wedding?"

"I think if we are going to do this, we should do it right. Maybe not a really extravagant wedding, but something nice. A dress and a tux. A ceremony with friends and a small reception."

"So now we have a wedding to plan."

"It shouldn't take long to throw something nice together. I can call and book the ballroom at the country club for the reception. We could get married right there on the golf course. That would be pretty. They cater, so that would take care of the food. All that is left is to order a cake and dress the kids."

"The kids….how are you going to tell them?"

"I don't think I will. Not right now, anyway. I think maybe it is too much for them to understand. If anyone lets it slip, there goes the entire plan. I think right now there is just too much at risk. I think it would be better to wait until it is over and we file for the divorce. Then we can sit them down together and explain why we did what we did. I just don't think they could handle it right now and there is just too much at risk."

Olivia took a deep breath and exhaled as she took a sip of her diet soda.

"Are you sure you're alright with all of this?" he asked.

"Yeah. Do you really think we can pull it off? I mean convince everyone around us that we are a happily married couple for six months?"

"I think it will all work out. We'll just be like roommates for a while."

"Roommates. Roommates who have to convince five children, among other people that we are happily married newly weds."

"The kids will need a little time to adjust to this. I expect a little shock and possibly even rejection from them at first. But they know you and they like you. Once we get together and are able to function as a family, once they have had some time to adjust, I think things will be fine."

"Okay."

"I will make a few phone calls and see when we can get the wedding scheduled."

Olivia watched as he pulled a credit card from his wallet and slid it across the table to her.

"You should start looking for a dress for yourself and pick out something for the girls."

"Are you sure moving this along this fast is good for them? We are not even giving them time to adjust to the fact that we are together. They had no idea we were even dating. Well, we weren't dating. But what if this ends up making things worse on them?"

"How could being a family again be worse on them?"

"They are still adjusting to life without their mother. Now some judge says they have to start splitting their time between their father and an aunt and uncle they barely even know. And now we spring a surprise engagement on them."

"You don't think we should do this?"

"I just think maybe we should more carefully consider the effect a change this big is going to have on the kids."

"We start therapy in a few days. We can sit down with the kids and have a family discussion. Let them help us make the wedding plans. The stuff like picking out the dresses and tuxes. Help them to feel like they are more involved, that might help them to adjust."

"We should get back to work."

"A ring."

"What?"

"We still have to get you a ring."

"I think a ring is the least of our worries."

"We want it to be believable, we need a ring. And bands. Why don't we cut out of work an hour or so early and we can stop by a jewelry store and pick something out."

"El, this is all going to cost money. How are we going to pay for it all?"

"I have some money saved. I can get a personal loan to cover the rest. I will take care of it."

"Alright. When do you want to talk to the kids?"

"How about dinner? At the house tonight. I'll order some pizza and we can make a salad. We'll sit down and have dinner like a real family. And we will discuss the wedding."

"Dinner tonight. That sounds like a plan. The kids leave to go stay with the Winters in a few days, we should think of some things to do with them. All of us together. That will kind of help them to get used to the idea of us together and how we will function as a family."

"That is a great idea. We could go to the beach or the zoo maybe. Something."

That evening Olivia arrived at Elliot's house in Queens with a stack of pizza boxes. The room was quiet as Kathleen set the table and Elizabeth sat a large salad bowl in the center of the table. Maureen was fixing drinks in the kitchen and Olivia was cutting up a slice of cheese pizza into little chunks for Eli to eat with his little plastic toddler fork.

"What would you like to drink, Olivia? I have soda, milk and I just made some sweet tea."

Olivia looked over at the smile on Maureen's face. Other than Eli, who didn't know any better, she was the only one of the children who seemed to welcome her.

"Tea would be great, honey. Thank you."

"Don't be so nervous," Maureen whispered over her shoulder. "Dad loves you, he wouldn't have proposed if he didn't. Elizabeth is excited, Dickie has a bit of a crush on you and Kathleen acts like that toward everyone. Don't take it personally."

Olivia laughed a little in relief.

"Thanks for the tip. What about you?"

"Me?"

"What do you think about your dad and I getting married?"

Maureen stared down at the counter for a moment, then looked up at Olivia with tears in her eyes and smiled.

"I want daddy to be happy. It has been really hard since mom died. You make him smile. I think this is a good thing for all of us. It just kind of came out of nowhere, so it takes a little getting used to. We didn't even know that you and dad were dating."

"I know and I am sorry this all got sprung on your guys like this. I am sure that wasn't how your father wanted you guys to find out."

"I guess none of that really matters anymore. All that matters now is that you are here and you guys are happy. Welcome to the family, Olivia."

Olivia smiled at the girl's kindness, this was the first time in her life that she had ever been considered a part of a family.

"Thank you," she said softly fighting back a few tears of her own.

"Are we ready to eat?" Elliot asked walking in on the conversation.

"We're ready dad. I just have to carry these drinks out."

Maureen sat the glasses on a tray and carried them into the dining room. Elliot looked over at Olivia, who seemed to be avoiding eye contact with him.

"Hey," he said softly placing his hand against the small of her back. "Everything okay?"

Olivia cleared her throat and wiped her eyes as she turned to look at him.

"Yeah," she said with a soft smile. "Everything is fine."

"Liv, did she say something?"

"Yeah, she said she was happy for us. And she welcomed me to the family," Olivia said as he watched the tears welling behind her eyes once more.

"Liv," he whispered, "are you alright?"

"I'm good. I just…. I….have never been part of a family."

Elliot slipped his hand into hers and locked their fingers together.

"You have always been a part of mine," he said with a soft smile as he lead her by the hand in to the dining room table.


	4. 4 United We Stand

_Playing House_

_(Chapter Four: United We Stand)_

Elliot stepped into the room to see Olivia sitting on a stool in front of the vanity. Her hair was curled and pinned partially up with baby's breath and little pearls in it. The soft and elegant layers of the long veil cascaded down her bare back and the ruffled skirt of her of her strapless gown fanned out behind her. She was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.

"Liv?"

"I'm almost ready," she said as she sat up and leaned closer to the mirror brushing her fingertip under her eye.

"Are you okay?" Elliot asked pretty sure she was crying.

"I'm fine," she said forcing a smile, "I'm just having a little trouble with these stupid false eyelashes."

"Liv, it's okay to be nervous," he said kneeling beside her. "Olivia, look at me," he said taking her hand in his.

Olivia turned to look at him with teary eyes.

"We don't have to do this. I can find another way."

"I want to," she said softly as she took a deep breath. "Besides, I think the bride is supposed to be nervous on her wedding day. I'm okay, El."

Elliot watched as she walked out onto the balcony to look down at the crowd of people gathering to witness their nuptials.

"Olivia, you are my best friend and I really appreciate you trying to help me out with this. But maybe this is not a good idea. This is too much to ask of anyone. You are giving up life as you know it to move in with me and pretend to be happily married. To spend six months of your life helping to raise someone else's children. This is a lot to deal with."

"You're not going to talk me out of it, Stabler."

"What's in it for you?"

"What?" Olivia asked looking over at him across the rail.

"Well, I get the judge off my back and I get to keep my kids. What to you get out of the deal?"

"How about the satisfaction of knowing that I did the right thing? That I helped my best friend and that I did exactly what he would have done for me."

Elliot smiled.

"Plus you could have one of those really cool hyphenated names, Olivia Benson-Stabler."

Olivia laughed.

"No?" he asked with a smile. "Look Liv, I know why you are doing it. But I can't help but feel like I am forcing you into something or that I am taking something sacred from you."

"You talk like you took my virginity."

"No, but something just as important. I am asking you to throw away your first marriage."

"I want to do this," she said looking back at him. "I love you, Elliot. You are my partner, my friend and my family. And I want to marry you, today in front of all of those people and help you keep this family together."

"Ahh, so this is all just to cover up the fact that you secretly want me."

"Oh yeah," she mocked. "And I won't stop until you are mine."

Elliot smiled and kissed the tip of her nose.

"Seriously, I love you too, Olivia. And I have never known anyone with a bigger heart. You look beautiful."

"Thank you," Olivia said softly as she cleared her throat. "We'd better get going. We don't want to be late for our own wedding."

"Shall we?" Elliot asked offering her his arm.

Olivia locked her arm in his as Elliot escorted her toward the door. She picked up her bouquet of red and ivory roses as they passed the vanity and made their way to the elevator.

An hour later, they were husband and wife. Sharing laughs and smiled, cake and champagne as they celebrated their union just like any other couple at their wedding. They danced on the lawn of the country club under the moonlight with all of their friends and posed for beautiful wedding photos of their new family.

At the end of the evening they kissed the children goodnight and waved to them as they drove away with their aunt and uncle. Then Elliot and Olivia climbed into the back of a stretch limousine and were wisped away to the honeymoon suite at a luxury hotel, courtesy of their friends at the NYPD.

Inside Elliot popped the cork on the iced bottle of champagne and poured them each a glass. He moved out onto the balcony to join his new bride as she gazed out at the view of the city lights.

"This place is gorgeous," Olivia said as Elliot handed her a glass the glass.

"It is. And this view is amazing."

"It was really nice of the NYPD to provide such an extravagant wedding gift."

"Looks like you and I have some very generous friends."

"Almost makes me feel a little guilty for lying to everyone."

"No one is going to find out. We care about each other, we love each other and now we are married. A few months from now we realize that this isn't really what we wanted and we file for a divorce. It isn't quite the same as lying."

"I guess not."

"To our future together as husband and wife," he said clicking his glass against hers.

"To….pulling off the ultimate undercover case," she said with a smile. "To uniting to keep a family together."

"Our family, Mrs. Stabler."

"Our family," she repeated.

"Man, this room is really incredible. The champagne, rose petals and candles everywhere, perfect for a romantic honeymoon."

"Yeah."

"Hey, we can still enjoy the room. Even if we aren't a real couple. You can have the bed and I'll sleep on the sofa. I will even give you first dibs on the hot tub."

Olivia laughed.

"Maybe tomorrow. I am actually exhausted. I think I am just going to get out of this dress, slip into some pajamas and check out the pay-per-view movies."

"Alright," Elliot laughed. "But it is nine o'clock on your wedding night, you sure you want to turn in so early?"

"I think so. Unless, you want to come in and watch a movie with me?"

"Like a slumber party?"

Olivia laughed.

"Whatever you want to call it. I just need to get out of this dress and into the shower, wash the seventeen pounds of hair spray out of my hair. Give me fifteen minutes?"

"Sure. That gives me time to call room service and order some snacks."

"Okay," she said with a smile. "But can you do me a favor?"

"Anything. I owe you more than I could ever repay."

Olivia smiled again.

"Can you unzip me?"

"Of course," Elliot laughed.

He watched as she held the dress against her body, picking up her skirt and walking into the bathroom.

When Olivia returned, Elliot had quite a picnic spread out across the bed when she returned wearing a pair of boxer shorts and a tee shirt.

"I counted over a hundred hair pins before I lost count," she joked as she ran a hair brush through her dark wavy hair. "I feel so much better. You got all of this from room service?"

"No, I called down and all they had was regular food. So I took a little walk to the all night grocery store on the corner. I got the basics. We've got….skittles, twizzlers, starburst, M&M's, regular and peanut, snickers, three different kinds of Doritos, nachos with jalapenos, popcorn and Haagen Daaz ," Elliot said holding up a tub of ice cream. "All of your favorites."

Olivia laughed.

"I have the best husband ever!" she laughed again as she climbed onto the bed. "Now all we have to do is find a movie."


	5. 5 Testing The Waters

_Playing House_

_(Chapter Five: Testing The Waters)_

Olivia carried groceries into the kitchen and began to put them away. She and Elliot had been married for almost a week now and this would be the first night she spent with him in his house in Queens.

"El?" she called noticing that the house stood empty around her.

She left the paper bag sitting on the counter and made her way down the hall to find her husband. _Husband_, she pondered as a smile crossed her face, the thought of the two of them now legally being husband and wife was still a bit strange to them both.

"Elliot?"

"I'm in here," he called from the master bedroom.

Olivia stepped into the doorway and looked around the room that Elliot once shared with Kathy, this was going to take a lot of adjusting. She looked around the small room for a moment and studied the queen sized bed against the far wall. If felt so strange to her to be standing in the dead woman's bedroom and she wasn't really sure if she was going to be able to do this.

"Hi," he said stepping out of the bathroom.

"Hi," she said tipping her head to the side to force a nervous smile.

"I have been meaning to fix the toilet in here for months. I figured now was as good a time as any."

"The toilet was broken?" she asked unsure of what to say to him.

Elliot laughed nervously.

"Yeah, it wouldn't stop running after you flushed it. But it is fixed now. I didn't think you wanted to lay in here listening to the toilet running all night."

"Umm, probably not," she said with a smile as she looked back at the one bed in the room.

Elliot watched her for a moment, then followed her stare to the bed.

"Don't worry," he assured her, "I have not slept there in over a year."

"What?" Olivia asked, her eyes raising to meet his.

"I sleep there," he said pointing to the recliner in the corner of the room. "You can have the bed."

"Oh," she said as she drew a deep breath. "Actually, I was thinking maybe that is not the best idea."

"Well, I guess you can take the chair if you want."

"No," she said realizing now that she had never been so nervous talking to him. "I mean, I am not sure it is a good idea for me to sleep in the bed you shared with Kathy. I don't really think that I….or any of us would be comfortable with that. Or am I just being silly about this?"

"Oh. No, that makes sense. I can get a different bed, if you want. I wasn't thinking."

"I just don't want to offend anyone, El. This is going to be hard enough on everyone to adjust to, you, me and especially the kids. And I don't think sleeping in their mother's bed is the best way to win them over."

Elliot scratched his head and looked at the bed for a moment.

"I should have gotten rid of it a long time ago. But I couldn't let it go, you know? I have not slept there since the day she was killed. I just couldn't do it. Sometimes the kids would come in here and lay on the bed and just hold on to her pillow. Maureen said it still smelled like her. It was more of a comfort thing, I guess. With the bed there I could just pretend she was away for a while and might be home soon. But I guess it is time to admit to myself that she is never coming back."

"I have an idea," Olivia said slipping her hand into his. "If the kids like sleeping here, why don't we move this bed into the girls room and bring my bed over for in here?" she offered with a smile. "If won't take long and then you don't have to get rid of it. And when this is all over with, you will still have it. We can store the kids' beds at my place for a few months. Unless you don't think the girls would want that?"

"No, I think they would love that."

Olivia smiled and pressed her lips together.

"I bought stuff to cook dinner for everyone tomorrow night. I thought being our first weekend with the kids since the wedding we could spend some time together just doing family things. Maybe go to the zoo or the park. I don't really know what they like to do."

"Dickie is into baseball and the girls are all about shopping and fashion," Elliot laughed. "Typical teenagers, I guess."

"I like to shop. At least that gives us a little common ground," she said with a nervous look. "I know they are probably going to hate me at first. But I want this to work and I am determined to stick it through and make this as easy on them as I can."

"Nobody hates you, first of all. It will be awkward, for everyone. But the kids like you. We all have some adjusting to do, here. We are all adjusting to having you here with us, but you are having to adjust from living your own life with your own space to being the married mother of four teenagers and a one year old. I think the culture shock here is pretty much even."

Olivia laughed.

"But I love that you are trying to be so optimistic about the situation."

"I'm a mother?" she asked suddenly realizing this for herself.

"You are their stepmother. That makes you a parent, a mother. These are _our_ kids now. Legally, anyway. But you don't have to be if you don't want to. I completely understand. I'm not trying to scare you or make you feel like I am dumping them on you. I think you have already had enough stress thrown at you without being expected to raise someone else's children."

"I don't feel like you are dumping them on me. But I have to admit that I know nothing about kids. The only kids I have ever even been around were yours and that was only for moments at a time. I don't know how to be a mother and I am afraid that I didn't have the best of examples growing up, either. But I am willing to learn. The way I see it, a relationship is supposed to be a compromise, two people working together. Fifty-fifty. And the entire point of this relationship is to do what is best for these children."

"I just don't want you to feel like I am expecting you to be a housekeeper and a nanny. All of the kids, with the exception of Eli, are plenty old enough to clean up after themselves. And when they get here I am going to lay down a few guidelines to try to help us all blend as a family. They are going to have chores around here and be expected to pick up after themselves. I don't want them taking advantage of the fact that you are here and expecting you to walk around behind them cleaning up after them. There will be boundaries."

"I expect this arrangement to be a little bumpy at first, Elliot. But I think that the problems will iron themselves out as we go. They are kids. And I expect them to be a little upset about the fact that their father just remarried and they are now having to share their time not only with him, but with this woman who they are going to feel is trying to replace their mother. I think once they realize that I pose no threat at all to their relationship with you and I am not trying to replace Kathy, things will be just fine."

"They are already not so happy. Jim and Kate enrolled them all in summer school to help them adjust to the new private school they will be attending in the fall. And Maureen is taking summer classes as well to try and catch up to where she would have been if she hadn't taken time off of school. They are also growing used to having a nanny and a housekeeper. So them just coming back here is going to be a shock to them. I expect a little rebellion from them all when they come here."

"What time do we pick them up tomorrow?"

"We can pick them up from school. Kate is going to bring Eli and the kids' stuff by work tomorrow and then I will pick them up from school. Maureen will come out to the house when she gets out of class so that we can spend the weekend with them all."

"One big happy family….I hope."

"Eventually," he said with a wink.

"Have you figured out how we are supposed to make this house big enough to make that judge happy?"

"I don't know. I called around to some contractors and I know the kids are not going to like this, but honestly, it would be cheaper to just get another place."

"You are thinking about moving?"

"I don't know yet. But I have to get permits to build the add on rooms. And by the time we add the expense to a house that is not really worth what I am putting into it….that would be the more logical theory. A friend of Kathy's is in real estate and she said she could sell this place for me pretty quick. But it will cost more to add the extra rooms than it would add value to the house."

"Elliot, the kids have lived in this house since they were born. I can understand them being upset about having to move. This is where their mother lived."

"I know. That is why I am not going to say anything until I know for sure. But if it comes down to giving up my house or my kids, the house has to go. I don't like it either, but I have to go whatever it takes….I refuse to give up my children. So for now I am looking not only for contractors, but also kind of for a place to possibly buy. It might be better for them if I can get a place closer to their new school."

"Their new school is in the city, Elliot. I thought that was why you and Kathy bought the house in Queens was to keep the kids from living in the city."

"Like I said, for right now I am just looking. Nothing has been decided for sure. I did ask her to keep a look out for me though. It really couldn't hurt to go look at a couple of places. Even if I don't end up selling, it might give me ideas for building on."

"True," she agreed knowing how hard this must be on him.

"So," Elliot said clearing his throat. "What did you have in mind for dinner?"

"I don't really know what the kids like. So far I just bought some soda and junk food. Chips and dip and snack stuff. Teenagers like that stuff, right?"

Elliot laughed.

"They love it."

"What do you think we should have for dinner? What do they like to eat?"

"Tacos, pizza, pasta, the usual foods kids like. They are not really picky eaters. Maureen eats salad with everything. Eli loves grilled cheese and macaroni and cheese….anything with cheese."

Olivia smiled.

"I think he and I will get along just great. Carbs and cheese are two of my favorite foods as well."

"Why don't we do a little shopping while when we go to get your bed? I can borrow the neighbor's truck and we can get that done this evening."

"Sounds good."

"Let me put these tools away and I will go over and get the keys."

An hour later they had one of the girls' twin beds loaded up into the neighbor's truck and were on their way into Manhattan. They dropped the bed off at Olivia's apartment and headed to the market on the corner to get some things so that Olivia could make dinner for the family the next evening. Then they returned to her apartment and loaded up her king sized bed into the back of the truck.

Olivia made her bed as Elliot fixed his blanket on the recliner across the room.

"You have really slept in that chair for over a year?" she asked tipping her head to focus her tired eyes on him.

"I have. After I lost Kathy….I just couldn't bring myself to sleep in our bed alone," he said softly.

"Elliot, I am so sorry about the way things have worked out. I have thought about that day a thousand times and even had nightmares about it. I have tried to think of something I could have done to try and save Kathy."

"You saved my son. If you hadn't helped them to get Kathy out of the car when you did, the baby would have died, too."

"You don't know that."

"I do. The doctor who worked on Kathy at the hospital, he told me that. She had lost too much blood and the stress of the delivery on her already weakened body was just too much. They did everything they could….you did everything you could. And because you did what you did, I have my healthy, beautiful son. I owe you so much more than you realize, Olivia."

"You don't owe me anything."

"Good night, Liv," he said softly settling into his chair for the night.

"Good night, El," she replied turning off the bedside lamp as she slid under the covers in her own bed.

The next afternoon the court case Elliot had to testify in ran over, leaving Olivia to pick up the children from school. Kate brought Eli by the precinct to drop him off. He smiled and mumbled his little one syllable words as he reached for Olivia hugging her tight.

"I missed you too buddy," she said with a smile as she carried him to the car to get the kids' bags. She loaded the bags into the back of her SUV and buckled Eli into his car seat, then headed across town to pick up the children from school.

She pulled up in front of the school as a group of teenagers came walking down the front steps. The junior high and high school were in the same building so she could pick up all three children in this one spot.

Dickie was the first to get into the vehicle, followed by Elizabeth.

"Hey guys, how was your day?" she asked with a warm smile.

"Good," Elizabeth said dropping her bag into the floorboard.

"It was okay," Dickie replied.

"Do you guys like your new school?"

"I like it," Elizabeth answered.

"It is school," Dickie said scrunching up his nose. "School is school. Only here we have to wear these stupid uniforms."

"Well, I think the uniforms look nice," Olivia said.

"You do?" Dickie asked straightening his tie.

"Yes. They make you look very mature and very grown up."

"How old do I look?" he asked as his eyes widened.

"I would say at least fourteen," Olivia said with a smile.

Elizabeth giggled.

"You're not fourteen?" Olivia asked him.

"No," Elizabeth answered.

"Thirteen?"

"No," Elizabeth laughed harder. "He is only twelve," she almost squealed as Olivia laughed.

"You are only twelve, too!" Dickie snapped kicking her across the back seat.

"Stop that!" Elizabeth warned giving him a dirty look.

"Well, I think the jacket and tie make you look much more mature than a twelve year old," Olivia said hoping a bit of child psychology would head off anymore bickering. And it worked like a charm.

Dickie scooted back to his side of the seat and looked out the window, refraining from arguing with his sister and Elizabeth picked up a toy and began to play with her baby brother.

"What time does Kathleen get out of class?" Olivia asked noticing the crowd of kids had pretty much disappeared.

"The same time we do," Elizabeth said looking over at Dickie.

"She didn't go to class today," Dickie said.

"I wonder why Kate didn't drop her off with Eli if she stayed home from school?" Olivia asked.

"Because Kate doesn't know Kathleen didn't go to school," Dickie answered.

"She is going to beat you up," Elizabeth warned.

"I don't care," Dickie snapped back at her.

"Kathleen skipped class today?" Olivia asked turning to look over her shoulder at the children.

Elizabeth looked at Dickie and neither of them said a word.

"Okay. Do you guys know where she might be?"

"The mall," Dickie answered.

"Dickie!"

"What?"

"She is so going to beat you up!"

"She is not!"

"Yes she is," Elizabeth whispered as she turned and looked out the window.

"She is at the mall?" Olivia asked.

"That is where she usually goes when she skips school."

"The mall is miles from here, how does she get there?"

"She calls her friends or hitch hikes after aunt Kate drops us off."

"She hitch hikes?"

"Is she going to go to jail?" Elizabeth asked.

"They can't put her in jail, stupid!"

"Actually, they can Dickie, because hitchhiking is against the law. It is very dangerous and I would think Kathleen would know better."

Dickie laughed.

"She's in trouble, now. Dad is going to be pissed."

"Where are we going, Liv?"

"To the mall to get your sister," she said turning to head across town and gather the other Stabler child.

Olivia drove around the parking lot of the shopping center for a while, looking through the group of teenagers scattered around but not seeing Kathleen.

"It doesn't look like she is here," she said.

"Her friends hang out inside by the arcade," Dickie said as Olivia parked the car.

"Then I guess we will go in and find her."

"What if she doesn't want to go with us?" Elizabeth asked.

"Are you going to put handcuffs on her?" Dickie asked.

"No," Olivia replied looking back at them as she pulled Eli from his seat, "I am not going to put handcuffs on her."

"That's a shame," Dickie said as Olivia looked back at him. "It would be really cool."

"Stay together guys," Olivia said as they crossed the parking lot and walked inside.

They walked around for half an hour checking all of the places Kathleen liked to hang out with her friends, but she was nowhere to be found. Olivia was really starting to worry that something bad could have happened to her. She gathered the kids and carried Eli back to the car.

As she drove through the parking lot to leave Kathleen came walking around from behind the building smoking a cigarette with some other kids. Behind her stood a boy who appeared to be in his late teens with his pants sagging around his hips, a lip ring and his hands all over Kathleen. Olivia pulled over the car and shut off the engine.

"You guys wait here," she said as she got out of the car and approached the group of kids. "Kathleen, could you come with me please?"

Kathleen just glared at her and didn't move.

"Your father asked me to pick you guys up and bring you home. You need to get into the car."

"Shit, you'd better go," the boy said, "before your mom gets really pissed."

Kathleen laughed and glared at Olivia.

"That is _not_ my mother," she snarled. "She is my _dad's_ wife."

The comment was obviously a shot at Olivia, but she was able to ignore it and stick to the matter at hand.

Kathleen glared at Olivia as she turned to kiss the boy, carefully watching the look on Olivia's face as they made out right in front of her. The other teens in the group whooped and whistled, egging them on.

Olivia pulled Kathleen by the arm away from the group of kids.

"What the hell! Get your hands off me!" Kathleen snapped jerking free of Olivia's grip and looking back at her friends as they watched.

"Do you have any idea what your father is going through to try and keep you guys together? Are you trying to screw this up, Kathleen?"

Olivia shouldn't have said it, but she was infuriated and the words were out of her mouth before she could stop them. If this child only knew the things her father was doing just to keep his family together, maybe she would realize just how much her stupid little stunts like this jeopardized.

Olivia took a deep breath as Kathleen looked back at the group of kids waiting to see what was going to happen.

"Kathleen, you can get in the car on your own or I can call your father and have him come down here. You need to get in the car."

"Liv," Elizabeth said from behind her. "Eli was crying."

Olivia turned around to see Elizabeth standing there holding Eli.

"It's okay, honey. Take your brother and get in the car. I will be there in just a minute."

"Okay," she said looking over at Kathleen.

Olivia watched as Elizabeth buckled Eli back into his car seat and got back into the car.

"Your brothers and sister are awaiting. Now get in the car and let's go."

"Fine," Kathleen said rolling her eyes and flipping her cigarette toward Olivia as she walked over and climbed into the passenger's seat of the car slamming the door behind her.

"Dad is so gonna kick your ass," Dickie taunted from the back seat.

"Shut up," Kathleen snapped as she spun around and punched him in the shoulder.

"I told you she was going to beat you up," Elizabeth said.

"You are in so much trouble," Dickie said as Olivia climbed into the car.

"Whatever," Kathleen said sliding down in the seat and pulling her ear buds from her pocket and turning on her ipod.

Elliot was already at the house when Olivia arrived home with the kids. Kathleen stormed into the house slamming the door behind her and dropped herself on the sofa.

"What is going on here?" Elliot asked looking over at Olivia.

"Kathleen skipped school and Olivia busted her," Dickie said heading to the kitchen.

"Elizabeth, why don't you and Dickie grab a soda and a snack from the kitchen and take Eli into our room to watch TV and let me talk to your dad?"

"Okay," she said taking her baby brother from Olivia and heading into the kitchen.

"She skipped school?"

"Apparently she does it often. According to Dickie she waits for Kate to drop them off and then calls her friends to come get her or hitch hikes to the mall. And she is smoking."

"Of course she is," Elliot said wiping his hand over his face unsure of what to do with the girl. "Is everything okay? I mean with you? I know how she can be."

"I'm fine. She took a shot at trying to piss me off, but I have dealt with worse from hardened criminals. I am worried about her, Elliot. She needs to understand how dangerous this is. Not just because of this court mess, but hitch hiking? She could end up…."

"Raped or killed or God knows what. I know," he said taking a deep breath. "I need to have a talk with her."

"I'm gonna check on the other kids and get dinner started. Elliot, I'm sorry."

"You didn't do anything wrong."

"Well, I tracked her down and I kind of yelled at her in front of her friends. I pulled her away from the group of kids she was with and I raised my voice to her. I shouldn't have done it. But it was like this was all some big joke to her."

Elliot smiled.

"I'm not upset with you for raising your voice to my kid. Sometimes that is the only way to get through to Kathleen. It was dangerous and you were concerned, I understand that. Don't beat yourself up over it."

"When we didn't find her in the mall…." Olivia began with tears in her eyes, "a million horrible thoughts flooded my mind. But the worst of all was thinking I was going to have to watch you lose your daughter, too. I know it sounds so silly now. I was over reacting. But I when Dickie told me she hitch hikes I felt my heart fall into the pit of my stomach. And when I found her standing there smoking with those kids, I was so scared and relieved I didn't know whether to break down and cry and hug her or scream at her and choke her. I have never felt that before and it scared the hell out of me," she said as she took a deep breath.

Elliot smiled.

"That is part of parenting. And I think you handled it perfectly. I have been a parent for almost nineteen years and I probably would have felt the same way. You have a big heart, Olivia and it looks like being a mother comes natural to you."

"I'm not her mother. And I don't want her to think that I am trying to be."

"You are her stepmother and you care about her. There is nothing wrong with that. And someday she is going to realize that you are not trying to replace Kathy and all of this acting like a jerk stuff will calm down a little."

"I hope you are right."

Elliot walked into the living room to see Kathleen slumped on the couch with her earphones turned up in an attempt to tune out the world around her. It was obvious she was pouting about something and he assumed it was the fact that her new stepmother had gotten to dad first.

"We need to talk," Elliot said sitting down in a chair across from his daughter. But she ignored him.

"Now," he said pulling the ipod from her pocket and unplugging the ear buds. "We need to talk now."

Kathleen just stared at him and he could see the anger and frustration building in her eyes.

"What the hell is going on with you?"

"Chill dad. I don't know what Olivia told you, but we were just kissing."

"Just kiss….No, I want to know about this skipping school and hitch hiking shit! Because I know that the child I raised is way smarter than that! This must be some kind of mistake, right?" he shouted.

Kathleen pulled her knees to her chest and folded her arms in front of her, she was shutting him out.

"You want to tell me why you cut class?"

"Because it sucks! This school sucks! Living with Aunt Kate sucks! This life," she said as she looked over her shoulder at the kitchen door, "sucks! I hate it! And I don't want to go back!"

"Kathleen, you have to go back. We have no say in the matter."

"This is bullshit! I made good grades and I am still stuck in summer school all because Dickie failed!"

"You don't want to be there, I get that. But sometimes in life we do things for other people. Your brother had to take these classes or he wasn't going to move forward in school. I know this past year has been incredibly hard on you guys and these last few months have not been much better. A lot of things are changing. But those things that judge said, those are the things we have to do to be able to stay together as a family."

"He didn't say you and Olivia had to get married."

"He didn't come out and say it, no. But he made it clear that the fact that Jim and Kate could provide two parents was a big deciding factor."

"They don't even want us, dad. They only want Eli, because he is still a baby."

"Look at me, Kathleen. I am never going to let them break us apart. Do you understand me? You and me and Dickie and Elizabeth and Eli and Maureen, I will do whatever it takes to keep us together as a family. And so would Olivia. She is a part of this family now and I want you kids to start treating her like it."

"She isn't my mom," the stubborn teen scoffed as she refolded her arms and looked away from him.

"No, she isn't. And no one will ever replace your mother. Olivia understands that. She isn't trying to replace mom. She is just another part of our lives."

Elliot studies the tears in Kathleen's eyes as she shook her head.

"This sucks!" she said as she stood and walked down the hall to her bedroom.

Elliot took a deep breath and followed behind her. He stepped into the girls' bedroom to see Kathleen stretched across the bed holding tight to the pillow her mother once slept on and crying.

"Talk to me baby. I can't make it better if you wont tell me what is bothering you."

"Everything! I just want to go back to before. Back when mom was still alive and we all lived here in our house together. And we were happy and stupid aunt Kate didn't care about us and…. I really miss mom."

"So, do I sweetheart."

"You do?"

"Yeah, I do. I miss her a lot."

"Then why did you marry Olivia?"

"Because I care about her. Because I love her and she is my best friend and I think that she is good for me and good for this family. She really is Kathleen, if you just give her a chance. But you can't keep acting this way, Kathleen. That judge is just waiting for some reason to pull you guys from me permanently and make you go live with aunt Kate for good. I know things suck right now. But this is the way that they have to be for a while. I think you are grown up enough to understand that."

"I guess. But it still sucks!"

"I know it does. Most of it anyway, I agree with you there. So we just have to take advantage of the time that we do have together and work really hard toward meeting those conditions the judge is asking for. We are a family, a team. And it is going to take every one of us to make this work. Can I count on you?"

"Yes," she said softly.

"And can I trust you to be civil and give Olivia a chance? You know this is all new to her, too. She has never had kids before."

"I promise. I will give her a chance."

"That's my girl," he said kissing the top of her head. "Why don't you get washed up and see if you can help her with dinner?"

"I will….dad?"

"Yeah, baby?"

"Thanks for putting you and mom's bed in here. I know it sounds weird, but it is kind of comforting to have."

"Actually, that was Olivia's idea. We talked about it and she decided that she….we would be more comfortable if we brought over her bed from the apartment. I was going to take this one over there and store it and she thought you girls might like to have it."

Kathleen smiled.

"I told you she wasn't that bad," Elliot said as he turned to leave.

"Dad?"

"Yea, Kathleen?"

"I didn't really hitch hike. I just wanted you to know. I did cut class and I called my friends to come pick me up. I just told Dickie that because he was being a little jerk and wouldn't leave me alone. It won't happen again, I promise. I wouldn't hitch hike. You taught me better than that. I just wanted you to know."

"And the smoking?"

"I only tried it a couple of times with my friends."

"Do you have cigarettes now?"

"A couple in my bag," she answered honestly.

Elliot held out his palm to her and she pulled them from her back pack and laid them in his hand.

"As bad as I want to sometimes, I am not going to yell at you. You know it is wrong and that I don't approve. These things are disgusting and bad for your health," he said breaking them in half. "I want you to be where you are supposed to be from now on. No ditching class, I want to know where you are. No more smoking. When you are old enough to walk into a store and legally buy these, then that is your choice. Until then, it is mine. And this business with this boy…."

"Dad…."

"Who is he?"

"He's just a boy."

"Just a boy with his tongue stuck down my daughter's throat."

"Dad, that is gross!"

"You're damn right it is! You tell that _boy _to keep his mouth to himself….and all of his _other_ parts, too!"

"Dad," she laughed as she rolled her eyes. "You and mom said that I could date when I turned sixteen. That is when Maureen started dating."

"Right. But when I agreed to that, I honestly thought mom would be here to pull me through it. And dating is _not_ the same thing as standing in front of the mall making out. If this boy is someone you are really interested in, bring him around here so I can meet him. Then we will see about him taking you out."

"You want to meet Jesse?"

"If this is someone who is going to be a part of your life I do."

She smiled again.

"Bring him around for a man to man."

"Okay, but you promise you will be nice?"

"I'll behave as long as he behaves. And treats my daughter nice."

"I love you daddy," she said with a smile as she hugged him.

"I love you too, sweetheart."

"I'm gonna call Jesse really quick. Then I will go help Liv with dinner."

"Okay."

Elliot walked back into the kitchen where Olivia had just pulled a lasagna from the oven to cool and was starting on a salad.

"How did it go?" she asked with a soft smile.

"I think we have reached an understanding. She has agreed to act like an adult and to back off a bit and give you a break."

"Did you tell her how dangerous it is to get into a car with someone you don't know?"

Elliot smiled.

"I did. And it turns out that was all just some story she told Dickie to try and impress him."

Olivia smiled.

"Are you sure?"

"I believe her. I think this was just her way of adjusting to everything that has gone on. But she understands how important this is for all of us and I really think she is going to try to do her part from now on to make this work."

"It sounds like the two of you really worked things out."

"I think so."

"Hey Liv," Kathleen said softly as she stepped into the room, "I was wondering if you needed any help with dinner?"

Olivia looked up at her and smiled.

"Sure. Would you like to cut up these tomatoes for the salad while I check the garlic bread?"

"Okay," Kathleen said as she washed her hands and Olivia handed her the knife.

Elliot sat at the counter and watched as his wife and child finished dinner together.


	6. 6 A Lesson In Love

_Playing House_

_(Chapter Six: A Lesson In Love)_

"There you are. I have been waiting here for half an hour," Elliot said standing to shake the hand of one of his old high school buddies.

"Ahh, I got a little distracted up at the bar."

"See something you like?"

"Oh, yeah. And she is fine. Perfect body, amazing rack, great ass."

Elliot just shook his head.

"Did she have a name?"

"Not one that I caught. Have not talked to her yet. I'll just call her my angel."

"You are such a womanizer. All you notice is her body."

"And her smile. Beautiful smile. You didn't give me the chance to mention that."

"Well, at least you noticed something more than her ass."

"Ooh, there she is," he said pointing at the sexy brunette standing across the room talking to the bartender. "Tell me that body wasn't made for sin."

Elliot laughed.

"You don't like her?"

"Na, she's beautiful. But how do you know she is even interested in you?"

"I can just tell. The way she smiled over here to me a while ago. I can tell these things. She was begging for it."

"_It?_"

"Yeah, you know…._it_," he grunted thrusting his hips toward the table.

"You have not changed a bit since high school."

"Say what you will, but that girl is going home with me tonight."

"She is, huh?"

"Oh, yeah. I am gonna make her say my name."

Elliot laughed again.

"You are so juvenile. That woman does not even know your name."

"But she will by the end of the night. And she will be calling it out so that the people in the next room can hear. I'm gonna show her how it is done."

"You are, huh?"

"Yes. You doubt me? Have you forgotten the powers I had over the women when we were in high school. I dated every girl on the cheerleading squad."

"And made them say your name?"

"Damn right, I did."

"I think maybe this is a little different."

"You willing to place a wager on it my friend?" he asked dropping a fist full of twenties onto the table.

"You want to bet that you can get that girl to go home with you?"

"Yes."

"That girl, right there," Elliot asked pointing to her.

"The one and only angel of my dreams. For tonight, anyway."

"Okay," Elliot said pulling one hundred dollars from his wallet and laying it down on the pile of cash. "Give it your best shot."

"I will. Watch closely, you might learn something."

"I'm watching. I don't want to miss this."

Elliot watched as his friend stood up and made his way toward the bar to talk to the beautiful woman at the bar.

Olivia sat at the bar waiting for the bartender to bring her a drink. She tipped her head to the side and watched as the man beside her was obviously trying to get her attention. The man was handsome and appeared to be successful, dressed in a big name suit and four hundred dollar shoes.

"Hi," he said with a seductive smile as he scooted in closer to her.

"Hi," Olivia replied forcing a slightly annoyed smile.

"How are you doing tonight?"

She didn't reply, only smiled again as she scanned her eyes over the bar once more.

"Would you like to dance?" he asked motioning over his shoulder to the crowded floor space behind him.

"There is no music," Olivia replied trying not to be rude.

"There is a jukebox in the corner. I'm sure I can find something good."

"Thanks, but….I don't dance."

"No? What a shame," he said eyeing her over once more. "At least let me buy you a drink."

"Thanks, but that really isn't necessary."

"Aww, come on. It is just a drink. Not like I'm asking you to go home with me."

"I appreciate the offer. And it is flattering, really. But I am here with a friend and I'm really just not interested. Thank you though."

"Ahh, I see. You can't hook up with someone and leave your friend here alone. I get it. It just so happens I am here with a friend here myself. Maybe I could introduce him to her."

Olivia watched as the man smiled. Apparently being polite wasn't getting through his thick skull. She hated when men acted like this. Thinking he was smooth and slick, every woman's dream. He couldn't comprehend the fact that she just was not interested in hooking up with him or anyone else for that matter.

"I really don't think that is such a good idea."

"Oh, no?"

"No," she said trying to think of the best way to break it to him, "my friend….is a guy."

Olivia watched the man's face hoping that it would finally sink in.

"Well, that is rather inconvenient," he said as he picked up his beer from the bar. "If you change your mind…."

"Yeah," Olivia replied combing her fingers through her hair once more flashing the diamond on her left hand and hoping that this time he would actually notice it.

"Nice talking to you," he said with a nod.

"Nice talking to you, too."

She watched as he picked up his drink and made his way back across the room. She shook her head and turned back around as the bartender handed her a beer.

"He bothering you?" he asked.

"No, Joe, nothing I couldn't handle."

"I was gonna say, if he couldn't take the hint I could go get your husband to help clarify the situation for him."

Olivia laughed and smiled.

"It is under control, thanks."

"Sorry it took so long. Table seven has a bachelorette party and about a dozen different mixed drinks. These are on the house."

"Are you sure?" she asked waving a five dollar bill in front of her.

"Yeah, for the wait. Tell El, I said hello."

"I will. You keep this," she said tucking it into his shirt pocket.

"Liv…."

"It is a tip. You work too hard. And you are our favorite bartender."

"Glad to hear that," he said with a laugh. "You guys just let me know if you need anything else. Or if that guy bothers you anymore tonight."

Olivia laughed.

"Will do," she said picking up the two beer bottles and heading back to their table.

Elliot watched as his friend returned to the table trying not to look like he had just been shot down. Elliot laughed as his buddy rubbed the back of his neck and shook his head.

"There is no hope for that one," he said. "She doesn't know what she is missing."

"Her loss," Elliot replied watching the woman across the room. "Mind if I give it a shot?"

"You? She shot me down cold. What makes you think you have a chance?"

Elliot leaned in and smiled at his friend.

"Double or nothing I can get that girl to go home with me tonight," he said determined to teach this old dog a lesson.

"Double or….you're wasting you're time, man. She isn't interested."

"You mean she isn't interested in _you_. Double or nothing?"

"Alright, but don't come crying to me when you don't have cab fare to make it home tonight. That girl is not looking for someone to take her home."

Elliot took a swig from his beer bottle and sat is on the table.

"Watch and learn," he said as he strolled over in her direction.

The man sat at the table watching Elliot smooth talk his angel from across the room. She smiled politely and talked with him for a moment.

"Here it comes," he mumbled to himself so sure she would shoot Elliot down.

But she didn't. He watched as she handed Elliot a beer and they laughed together for a moment. Elliot motioned in the direction of their table and the two of them began to walk in his direction.

"I'll be damned," he said watching as Elliot pulled out a chair offering her a seat.

"Olivia, this is…."

"Mike," the man cut Elliot off during the introduction. "Olivia, that is a beautiful name."

"Thanks Mike," she said with a smile. "So what have you guys been up to over here?" she asked looking at the two of them.

"Mike was just telling me how he wants to make you say his name," Elliot said as Olivia smiled and shook her head.

"Dick," Mike spat at Elliot.

"Actually Olivia, I was wondering if you would like to share a cab home later?" Elliot asked and she smiled again.

"Umm, sure. That would be great."

Mike looked a little confused. Why on Earth would she turn him down, yet jump at the chance to go home with Elliot. He watched as Elliot and Olivia talked for a few moments and Elliot ever so slyly slipped his arm around her as they flirted. Honestly, he couldn't believe that she was even still talking to him with some of the lame lines he was using. Moments later he watched as Elliot leaned in and pressed his mouth to Olivia's.

"What the hell?" Mike said in protest as they both turned and looked at him. "You wont even give me the time of day, because you are _here with a friend, _but you will sit right here in front of me and make out with him?"

Elliot laughed and Olivia smiled.

"It isn't funny," Mike spat again. "Why is it okay for him and not me?" he demanded as he stared at her.

"Mike, chill man."

"No, I want to know why she shot me down and then jumped at the chance to go home with you?"

Olivia laughed and looked back at Elliot.

"Mike, I'd like you to meet Olivia," Elliot said.

"We've met," he growled feeling more than a little burned by the situation.

"Olivia is my wife," Elliot said as she smiled and extended her left hand to shake Mike's.

"She's your old lady?"

"Who are you calling old?" Olivia laughed.

"You're his wife?"

"I am. And to answer your question, I couldn't go anywhere with you, because I am here with my husband," she said pointing to Elliot.

"Your husband….your friend, the friend that is a guy."

"Yes. My best friend, who is a guy and also happens to be my husband. I'm sorry. I was trying not to be rude. I kept trying to get you to notice the ring, but you never did."

"No, I didn't. It is beautiful, by the way."

"Thanks," she said as they attempted to make small talk.

"Listen Elliot, I should get going. It was nice talking to you and I will see you at the reunion tomorrow, okay?"

"Yeah, man."

Olivia watched as Elliot shook the man's hand.

"Olivia, it was very nice to meet you. I am sorry for all of the confusion."

"It's alright," she said as she shook his hand.

"Buddy, you have got to be the luckiest man in the world," Mike said looking over at Elliot and kissing Olivia's hand.

"I know," Elliot laughed. "I'll see you tomorrow."

They waved and watched as Mike walked toward the door.

"So….do you want to tell me what that was all about?" Olivia asked.

"Yeah, that was Mike."

"I caught that part."

"And that was the easiest two hundred bucks I have ever made," Elliot said straightening out the cash and slipping it into his wallet.

"There was a bet? Now, I'm confused."

"Mike came over here bragging about this girl he met at the bar and how he was going to take her home and do all of these things to her. He is kind of a jerk when it comes to women and he always acts like this. So when he offered up a bet that he could get you to go home with him, I figured I would teach him a lesson."

"And you did?"

"I did. We went double or nothing after you shot him down that I could get you to go home with me. I won."

Olivia laughed.

"That was cold, El."

"Well, maybe he will slow down a little from now on and reconsider the way he treats women."

"Do you really think that losing a bet to you will change the way he treats women?"

"No," Elliot said with a smile. "But maybe he will at least think to check for a wedding ring before he goes trying to take home Ms. Right for the night."

Olivia smiled.

"Maybe. But I wouldn't hold my breath if I were you."

"Some people never change," Elliot replied. "Next round is on me."


	7. 7 Beautiful Soul

_Playing House_

_(Chapter Seven: Beautiful Soul)_

Elliot groaned as he sat down at his desk rubbing the sore muscles in the back of his neck.

"You alright?" Fin asked.

"Yeah," Elliot groaned, "Just a little sore."

"What in the world are you doing to him?" Fin asked looking over at Olivia.

"I didn't do anything," she replied looking over at him from her desk. "Probably from sleeping in that chair."

"She made you sleep in a chair?"

"I fell asleep in the recliner," Elliot said looking over at Olivia and trying to devise a cover story.

"That will get you every time," Munch said joining in on the conversation. "In my years of bachelorhood that is a lesson I learned the hard way," he said rubbing his neck in sympathy.

"I'm fine. A few ibuprofen and twenty minutes with a heating pad and I will be good as new."

"Well, do you think you can drive?" Olivia asked tossing him the car keys. "We are supposed to pick the kids up from school in half an hour."

Elliot laughed and followed her to the elevator.

That evening they sat around the house with all five children eating pizza and playing board games. As the night wound down and the children settled into piles of pillows and blankets in the living room floor to watch the latest horror flick, Elliot and Olivia found themselves getting ready for bed.

Olivia sat on the edge of the bed rubbing jasmine scented lotion over her arms as Elliot tossed his blanket and pillow into the recliner.

"El, maybe we should reconsider these sleeping arrangements. Sleeping in that chair really isn't good for your neck and back."

"Liv, I have been sleeping in this chair for over a year and a half now."

"My point exactly. Look what is has done to your neck."

"I am fi…."

"Fine, I know," she said walking over to his side. "Elliot, I have seen you with a bullet in your gut half a pint of blood away from bleeding out and you were fine. You have to take better care of yourself."

She reached up and carefully worked her fingers over the sore spot on his neck.

"Ahh," he groaned and winced in pain.

"I'm sorry. Your muscles are so tense. You have knots all across your neck and shoulders. Sit down," she demanded pulling the chair from the vanity and pushing him down into it.

"Easy," he said looking back at her as she squirted a bit of lotion into her hand and reached for him. "Hey," he growled pushing her hand away from him.

"What?" she laughed observing the look on his face.

"That smells like perfume."

"So? What….you don't want me to rub it on you because it is _girl_ lotion?" she laughed. "Elliot, it will help, I promise. You trust me, don't you?"

"I do. The lotion, I am not so sure of."

"Fine. I will make you a deal. You let me use this tonight and tomorrow we will pick up some of that _manly_ stinky mentholated muscle rub stuff. I think if I massage this in it will help loosen up and maybe even get rid of some of the tenderness and tension in your neck and shoulders."

"You really think it will help?"

"I do."

"Okay. But….go easy on me."

Olivia laughed.

"Take your shirt off and lay down on the bed."

"Yes, ma'am."

Moments later Olivia was working her magic on his back and shoulders and the bedroom he shared with his new bride was filled with the _girly_ aroma of jasmine and wild flowers. Elliot gritted his teeth and fought off a groan as she worked over the area.

"Am I too rough?" she asked.

"No, that actually feels great. You are pretty good at this."

"Yeah, well I may still have a few tricks up my sleeve."

"Tricks?"

Olivia laughed.

"I'm not exactly domestic, I will be the first to admit. But there are a few things I have learned over the years."

"Like massage therapy?"

"I was a cheerleader. I learned how to work out the tension in a sore muscle."

"Use girl lotion?" Elliot laughed.

"The lotion serves as a lubricant. It helps the fingers to glide more gently over the sensitive areas."

Elliot looked over his shoulder at her and smiled fighting back another laugh.

"Dirty mind," she said shaking her head and smiling. "The floral smell from the girl lotion actually kind of serves as like aromatherapy. It helps you relax and allow your body to loosen up so that I can work deeper into the tissue without causing pain."

"Whatever you are doing, it feels incredible."

"But you are not going to fix this by sleeping in that chair."

"Well, I would sleep on the sofa, but the kids are sure to notice. They get up at the crack of dawn."

"Elizabeth gets up at the crack of dawn. And I was thinking more like the bed."

"We could do like Lucy and Desi and sleep in twin beds," he joked.

"Or you can bring your pillow and blanket and sleep here," she suggested scooting over and patting the space beside her.

Elliot studied the look on her face trying to determine if she was serious or not.

"This is a king sized bed, there is plenty of room for two people. We would have our separate blankets, it isn't like we would even be touching. And it would get rid of all of this pain in your neck and back. Then that chair can go."

"Go? Go where?"

"Out with the trash would be my suggestion. It is all torn and ragged."

"It is broke in."

"It is broke down. And it smells."

"What if I kept it for my man cave?"

"Man….what?"

"My man cave. You know, a designated place just for me."

"Where might this place be, because I have never seen it?"

"Well, I don't have one yet. But I was thinking, I could use one."

"We don't have the room. The house already isn't big enough to satisfy this judge, El."

"While I am adding on rooms, I can add a man cave."

"Or you could use the shed in the back yard. The chair would look great out there."

Elliot stared at her trying not to laugh.

"No man cave, huh?"

"Hey, you build us enough rooms to be able to keep the kids and you can have a bat cave for all I care."

"And this….is why you make such a great wife."

"Why is that?"

"Most wives kick their husbands out of the bed, mine kicked me into it. And not many women would give their husbands an amazing jasmine scented massage, not to mention every time you and I disagree we discuss the situation while you try to talk some sense into me, then you end up giving in to whatever it was I wanted in the first place."

Olivia smiled.

"I do. Don't I?"

"I'm telling you, this is the perfect marriage."

"Except for the whole lack of sex thing?"

"Obviously, my dear, you have never been married. I think the no sex rule is like one of the commandments of marriage. I mean sure it starts out hot and heavy. But then you add a kid and a couple of jobs and little sex is reduced to no sex. And any time we made an exception to this rule, we got pregnant and that made it even harder to find alone time. And before I knew it, I was a widower raising five children all alone."

"Not alone."

"You're right. Thanks to you and your beautiful soul, I still have a chance at keeping my children. And I'm not facing any of this alone. I am forever grateful to you, Olivia. I don't know how I will ever repay you."

Elliot stared into her eyes as she smiled.

"You can repay me by getting rid of that nasty old chair," she joked.

"Done. I will haul off the chair. It isn't really that comfortable any more anyway."

Olivia watched quietly as Elliot laid his pillow on the bed and spread out his blanket beside her. He picked up the decorative quilt that adorned the top of the bed and spread it out over both places.

"What is that for?" she asked.

"This way it is less obvious that we have separate blankets."

"Ahh, okay. That makes sense."

She laid back down into her place settling into her pillow as Elliot reached over and turned out the light.

"It is a comfortable bed," he said unsure of how to make this situation less awkward.

"Thanks," Olivia said softly as she stared up at the ceiling in the dark and waited for sleep to come. "It is actually still kind of new. I just bought it about six months ago."

"Memory foam….nice. Comfortable."

"El, you already said that. You don't have to talk about my bed," she said looking over at him.

"Sorry, I just….I didn't know what to say."

"We could just go to sleep. This doesn't have to be strange. We are sleeping beside each other on a bed, nothing else. There is nothing wrong with that."

"I know. It just seems strange, laying here in the dark and quiet. I guess the stillness makes me nervous."

Olivia smiled at him in the dark.

"Why don't you turn on the television and find a movie or something. Just until you fall asleep."

"It won't keep you awake?"

She stared over at him and smiled again.

"Confession," she said softly. "The silence makes me a little nervous, too."

"You just said that we aren't doing anything wrong."

"We aren't. I guess that was my little pep talk to myself."

Elliot laughed.

"I have another idea," he said as she raised up and fluffed her pillow.

"What is that?"

"You find a movie," he said placing the remote control in her palm. "I'll go make popcorn."

Olivia laughed.

"You know, this marriage just might work out after all."

"Dad?"

Elliot groaned and opened his eyes. He stared ahead for a moment at the wall and tried to remember how he had ended up in this position. He gulped as he lowered his chin and blinked his eyes until the room came into better focus.

He attempted to sit up, but he couldn't. His left arm felt heavy and numb from sleep and was stretched out underneath the pillow where Olivia rested her head. She was facing the wall, still asleep, but her body was curled in perfectly into the curve of his.

"Dad?" the girl's voice repeated.

Elliot slipped his right arm from around Olivia's waist, unlocking their fingers as he tried to slip away without waking her.

"Yeah honey," he groaned as he rolled to look over his shoulder at Elizabeth staring him down.

"Eli is awake. And we're hungry."

"Have your sister fix you something."

"Kathleen is still asleep and Maureen isn't here yet."

"You're twelve, can't you cook?"

He watched as Elizabeth just shook her head.

"We're not supposed to mess with the stove unless there is an adult right there with us."

"So what does aunt Kate do about breakfast?"

"Aunt Kate has the housekeeper cook breakfast for us," Elizabeth replied.

"Of course she does," Elliot said scratching his head.

"And there is no cereal."

"Okay, okay. Take your brother into the living room and find him some cartoons. Get him a cup of juice and watch him. I'll be in there in a minute to start some breakfast."

"Okay, dad."

Elliot watched as she ran back into the other room. He closed his eyes for a moment and focused his mind on the matter at hand. How was he going to get out of the bed without waking Olivia? Without having to try and explain to her how they ended up curled up together on her side of the big bed.

He rolled back to look at her laying there sleeping so peacefully. He smiled as he noticed how the sunlight from the window across the room made her tanned skin seem to glow.

Elliot pulled his arm slowly out from under her pillow. As he did, Olivia's eyes fluttered open to look at him. They said nothing, only stared at each other for a moment. Right about the time Elliot thought he would stop breathing completely, she smiled at him.

"Morning," she said with a soft yawn.

"Good morning," Elliot replied with an embarrassed smile.

Olivia laughed.

"I have no idea how this happened," Elliot said as she stared up at him with her pretty eyes.

"You're embarrassed we were caught spooning?" Olivia joked. "Elliot, nothing happened. It's okay," she said as she sat up in the bed. "No harm done."

"Elizabeth saw us like this."

"El, the kids think we are really married. They think we have been sleeping together in the bed this whole time."

"I guess you're right," he said sitting up and scrunching his toes in the carpet. "You hungry? I'm going to go start some breakfast."

"Sounds good. But I think I'm gonna hit the shower."

_**ONE WEEK LATER….**_

"Olivia, Can I see you in my office for a minute?" Cragen asked as she tipped her head trying to decipher the meaning in the tone of his voice.

Something about the unsteady shakiness of his words made her heart drop into the pit of her stomach and she still didn't even know why he wanted to speak with her. Olivia stood from her desk closing the file she had been working on as she made her way toward the office door. Half way across the room, Elliot looked at her as if asking what was going on. Olivia just shrugged as she drew a deep breath and continued on her way.

"Close the door and have a seat. Can I get you some water or anything?"

"I'm fine," she said softly as he placed a small Styrofoam cup of water into her hand. "Thank you," she said looking more than a little confused. "What is going on Captain? Have I don't something wrong?"

"Not at all. But I am afraid I do have some bad news for you."

Olivia's heart stood still waiting for him to continue.

"Liv, it's about your mother…."

"She's dead. Isn't she?"

Cragen wasn't really sure what to say to her.

"I'm afraid so. I am really sorry, Liv. There was an accident in the subway station. I got the call a few minutes ago. It seems she fell down some stairs and hit her head."

"She was drunk?"

"They wont really know until they get the toxicology report back."

Olivia stared at him in disbelief. She had worked enough of these cases to know a drunk when she smelled one. And Serena Benson liked her cocktails and hard liquor. If she was drinking at all, she was drunk.

"Captain…."

"They said they could smell the alcohol on her."

"So she got drunk and fell down some stairs and died?"

"There was a bar around the corner from where they found her. She probably came out of the bar and fell down the stairs. She hit her head hard against the wall at the bottom."

"How did they know it was her?"

"The good Samaritan who found her also stopped a bum from stealing her purse inside was her wallet with her ID card."

Olivia sat quietly for a few moments staring at her shoes. She had never felt so conflicted. This was her mother and the woman who gave her life, but as much as she felt heartache for the loss and as badly as she wanted to cry right now, she found no tears.

"Liv, why don't you take a little time off. You will need a little time to get things in order and I think you should take a little time for yourself as well. Why don't you get Elliot to take you home?"

"It's alright. He has court this afternoon and can't miss it. I can take a cab. I would really rather he not know just yet. I mean, not until I have the chance to find out for sure what is going on and talk to him."

"Honey, legally, I can't tell him anything. But I really think that you should talk to him."

"I will, I just want to wait until he gets home tonight and we can sit down and…."

"Alright," Cragen agreed sensing she was about to break down.

Elliot waited as long as he could for her to come back out, but he had to go or he would be late for court. A few hours later he returned noticing Olivia was nowhere to be found.

"Captain, where is Olivia?" Elliot asked sticking his head into Cragen's office.

"I sent her home for the rest of the day."

"Is she in some kind of trouble?"

"No trouble."

"Why did you send her home?"

"I am not at liberty to say. Technical stuff, but I really think you should talk to her. Why don't take the rest of the afternoon off. Go home and talk to you wife. If you need any more time, just give me a call."

Olivia was on the phone when Elliot walked into the house. He stepped around the corner and leaned against the wall smiling at her.

"I will come in tomorrow morning to handle the details, thank you," she said as she hung up the phone.

"Is everything alright?" he asked as she stared up at him with tears in her eyes.

"My mother is dead."

"Olivia, I am sorry."

She pressed her lips nervously together and as she looked at him.

"She was drunk and leaving the bar. She….um….fell down the stairs at the subway station and hit her head. Warner is helping with the autopsy this afternoon, but she said that she is pretty sure she died almost instantly of a brain hemorrhage. She probably felt little to no pain and it was a quick death," she choked out as the first tear of the day rolled down her cheek.

Elliot sat down beside her on the sofa.

"Liv, I don't know what to say. I am so, so sorry. Is there anything I can do?"

"I have to make funeral arrangements and notify, I don't really know who to notify. And her lawyer keeps calling and I don't know what to say to him. The paper wants information for the obituary and…." she exhaled softly. "I don't even know where to start," she sobbed.

"Hey," he said softly staring into her eyes and wiping away a tear, "I have a little experience with this stuff from back when we lost Kathy. Liv, I know how hard this is, but I can try and help you if you'd like? But I think maybe for tonight you should just try to relax and unwind a little. These next few days are going to be very emotional and stressful for you. Why don't you take it easy? I'll make us some dinner and tomorrow we can go down to the funeral home together and make the arrangements. If you want?"

Olivia drew a staggered breath as she nodded her head.

"Thank you," she whispered softly.

"Hey, we're a team. You're not in this alone."

He watched as she forced a smile.

"I think I'm going to go take a bath. I'm still waiting for this all to sink it. It all seems so unreal."

A few days later Elliot sat beside Olivia at the service for Serena Benson. He watched her sad brown eyes as they filled with tears and soon began to overflow. Elliot slipped his hand into hers and locked their fingers together. Olivia looked down at their matching gold bands as they settled against the diamond on her left hand.

In her right hand she clutched the program for the service. Everything was beautiful. The casket was the finest they made and the flowers were amazing. Elliot had really come through for her on this. Olivia had no clue what to expect when planning a funeral and at the time all of the decisions had to be made, her mind was somewhere else.

"Liv," Elliot whispered softly against her ear.

"Yeah," she answered without blinking.

"I think we're supposed to stand now to greet people," he whispered.

"Yeah," she said softly.

Elliot stood, leading her by the hand to the front of the room to stand beside the casket. The entire event was like a big haze to Olivia. She didn't speak, she could barely breathe. Riddled with guilt over the rocky relationship she had always shared with her mother, she just stood there and shook the hands of guests as they paid their last respects.

After the service, a get together was held at Olivia's apartment. There was food everywhere and dozens of people, but Olivia sat alone staring out the window.

"Hey," Elliot said sitting down beside her and handing her a red plastic cup. "I brought you some soda."

"Thank you," she whispered.

"Olivia, are you okay?"

She looked up at him with tears in her eyes and he knew that she needed to get away from this crowd.

"Come with me," Elliot whispered as he leaned in close to her.

He slipped his hand into hers once more and lead her to the elevator. As they got downstairs, Elliot realized that his car was blocked in. He looked around for a moment, there were no cabs in site. Then he noticed a shiny black motorcycle parked out in front of the apartment building. He looked around for another minute, noticing a group of people standing on the front steps smoking.

"Wait right here," he said as she nodded to him.

Elliot approached the group as he caught the eye of one familiar face.

"Cassidy," he said as the man made his way toward Elliot.

"What's up man?"

"That your bike?"

"Yeah. Brand new. Sweet, huh?"

"Nice. Listen, can you give me your keys?"

"What for?"

"Come on, Brian. I just need to get Olivia out of here. The car is blocked in. Here," Elliot said pulling a hand full of cash from his wallet. "Help me out here, man."

"Why don't you just take a cab?"

"Brian…."

"Alright," he protested flipping his cigarette. "Just be careful. I have only had it a week."

"I owe you," Elliot said returning to Olivia's side. "Come on," he said as she climbed on to the bike behind him. "Hold on," he said looking at her over his shoulder and Olivia wrapped her arms around his waist and laid her head against his shoulder as she closed her eyes tight.

A few minutes later Elliot pulled the bike over in front of a little store.

"Do you wanna come in? I'll only be a minute, then we can be on our way."

"El, where are we going?" she asked softly.

"Anywhere you want to go. Do you want to go back to the house?"

Olivia shook her head.

"I just want to get away from here."

"I have an idea. But I need to run in here first."

"Okay, I'll wait here."

Elliot returned a few minutes later and handed her a rolled up paper bag.

"What is this?"

"A little something to help you feel better," he said as she started to open the bag. "Not yet, it's a surprise."

Olivia held on to the bag as Elliot climbed back onto the bike and she scooted in against him once more. She tucked the bag into her lap and held to Elliot, then they were off again.

They rode for nearly an hour as they left the city and kept on going. Olivia shivered a little and nestled her cheek against his back as leaned into the curves of the road and the ruffled skirt of her black dress blew gently in the Harley breeze.

She looked up at the sky as thunder began to rumble and a few minutes later it was pouring rain on them. Finally they turned off onto an old dirt road and pulled the bike into a barn.

"Where are we?" she asked as Elliot pulled his key ring from his pocket.

"You wanted to get away. Come on," he said taking her hand as they ran through the rain across the yard toward a small cabin.

Olivia screamed and laughed, tipping her head back and looking up at the sky as the lightening seemed to spread for miles.

"Are you coming?" Elliot asked reaching for her hand again.

"It's beautiful," she said as the sky lit up once more.

"If we don't get inside soon we are going to catch pneumonia, if we don't get struck by lightening first."

Olivia made a sad face and just stared at him. Elliot stepped forward and kissed her on the forehead as Olivia smiled at him.

"Let's get you inside," he said.

Elliot unlocked the door as they stepped inside.

"Lights are around here somewhere….there," he said as the room lit up.

"What is this place?"

"Cragen's cabin. I used to bring Dickie here to fish. But it has been a while since I have been here."

"It's freezing," she said as her bottom lip quivered.

"The bathroom is through the bedroom if you want to freshen up. I'll get a fire going and get it warmed up in here."

"Thanks, El."

He looked up at her as she gave him a soft smile.

"No problem, sweetheart."

Olivia returned a few moments later with a few blankets.

"I checked the dresser and closet, I was hoping to find some extra clothes so we could change out of these wet ones."

"Did you find any?"

"No, but I did find some extra blankets and pillows."

"You hungry?"

Olivia looked at him for a moment then smiled.

"I'm starving. Is there food here?"

"Well, I found a couple of cans of Spam and some spaghetti O's."

"Spam?" Olivia asked scrunching up her nose.

"Spaghetti O's it is. Now, if you will have a seat in front of the fire and get warmed up, I will prepare us a gourmet meal."

Olivia laughed.

"Okay," she said as she spread out one of the blankets in front of the fire.

Elliot made his way to her side a few minutes later with juggling two bowls and two coffee mugs.

"What is this?" she asked as he handed her a mug.

"There are no wine glasses, this was the best I could do."

"You got wine?"

"You're favorite. I thought it might help you feel better."

"You're amazing."

"You needed a break."

"Brian is gonna be pissed that we didn't bring his bike back."

"He'll get over it. You know, I did find some instant coffee in there while I was raiding the cabinets. Not as good a the Folgers you are used to, but I figured we could have some for breakfast."

"With our Spam?" she laughed.

"With our Spam," he agreed. "Liv, I am so sorry for everything that has happened. I know this hasn't been easy on you."

"I don't think that losing someone is ever easy. And I guess it was bound to happen eventually."

"That doesn't make it any easier to accept."

"No. El, if it's alright with you I would rather not talk about it."

"That's just fine. I imagine you are exhausted. Let me carry these dishes to the kitchen and then I will get some more pillows from the bedroom. Would you like some more wine?"

"I'm good, thank you."

Elliot brought extra blankets and a couple of pillows in and helped her fix up a place in the floor for them to sleep.

"If we take off these wet clothes, they will probably be dry by morning."

"Yeah," she agreed.

"I can give you a some privacy if you want to get undressed."

"Okay."

Elliot stepped into the bedroom and closed the door. He undid his tie and laid it across the bed. He unbuttoned his shirt and stepped out of his pants laying them out on the bed to dry.

In the living room, Olivia unzipped her dress and stepped out of it. She laid the dress out across the chair in the corner of the room. She sat in the chair and slipped off her stockings and draped them over the chair as well."

"Liv, are you ready?"

"It's alright, El. I'm wearing a slip, pretty much the same as night gown."

She turned around to see Elliot standing in his boxers and a tee shirt.

"You can take the sofa," he said as he made his way to her side.

"Thank you," she said laying down and pulling the blanket up around her.

"Good night, Olivia."

"Good night, Elliot."

Olivia laid in the silence and stared into the flames until her eyes finally fell shut. A few hours later Elliot opened his eyes to find her there in the floor beside him, curled in against him, the way she did so many times at home. The truth was he found it just as comforting as she did. He tucked the blanket around her and laid back down beside her.


	8. 8 A Deal With The Devil

_Playing House_

_(Chapter Eight: A Deal With The Devil)_

Elliot sat at his desk barely able to focus. He couldn't help but wonder if he shouldn't be home with Olivia helping her through this tough time. But he didn't have many personal days and was trying to save them for when they had the children. When he had gotten up this morning, his wife had insisted she was fine, so he went on to work. Now he sat here feeling like a big jerk for leaving her at home alone.

He picked up his cell phone and dialed her number to check on her. Moments later he heard a phone ringing across the room. He looked up to see Olivia walking through the door.

"Liv? What are you doing here? Cragen gave you a few days off. I really think you should take them."

"Relax. I am just going stir crazy sitting back at the house. I figured I would come into the city and start boxing up some of the things from my mother's apartment. I just stopped by here to get my messages."

"You know, if you want to wait a few hours until I get off work, I would be glad to help you with that. Maybe you shouldn't do this alone."

"I will be fine. And the sooner I get it done, the better. I just want to be able to move past this mess and get back to my life. As long as that apartment sits across town full of old memories, I am never going to be able to fully get past this and move forward. She is dead now and I am still letting her hold me back."

"Alright, well if you change your mind just give me a call. I could probably knock off a few hours early today if you need someone."

"Thanks, El."

He watched as she smiled at him with her tired eyes. He knew how much of an emotional drain this was on her. Olivia had never fully forgiven her mother for the things that had happened in the past. They had never reconciled and shared a happy, loving mother daughter relationship and now that Serena was gone for good, that was really eating at Olivia.

"Hey, there is one more thing," Elliot began.

"Yeah?"

"Do you think you can meet me for lunch? There is something I want to show you."

"Sure. You want me to just meet you back here?"

"That would be great. It will only take about an hour or so and then I will buy you lunch where ever you like."

"Okay," se said with a smile. "Are you going to tell me what it is you plan to show me?"

"Nope, it is a surprise. I haven't really seen it all myself. But I think you will like it. And if you do, hopefully I can work something out…."

Elliot studied the look on her face and could tell he was confusing her,

"Anyway, meet me here at noon?" he asked.

"No problem."

"Benson? I thought I gave you a few days off?" Cragen asked as he stepped out of his office.

"You did. I was just getting my messages."

"It is Stabler," Elliot corrected his boss.

Olivia laughed and smiled.

"So it is," Cragen agreed. "I'm sorry, Liv. Old habits die hard. I am liable to call you Benson forever."

"I don't mind," she laughed. "I know who you are talking about."

"How are you doing?"

"I'm good," she answered.

"Considering," Cragen added. "But it is only Monday. You have four more days off. Take them, Olivia. It may not seem like you need them at the moment, but you need to give yourself time to heal emotionally. And they are paid, so it is sort of like a little vacation without burning up your vacation days."

"Like I said, I just came in for my messages."

"I can send your messages home with your husband….the _other_ Stabler."

Olivia laughed.

"Seriously, I don't want you to worry about things here. We have everything under control. Anything here that cannot wait until you return next week, can be handled by Elliot or one of the other detectives. Take a little break and give yourself some time."

"Thanks Cap," she said with a smile as she laid the messages down onto Elliot's desk. "I will see you in a few hours?" she asked looking at Elliot.

"Sure. If you need anything or just want to talk, call me. I am around here all day today."

"I will, promise."

"You are coming back in a couple of hours? More messages?" Cragen asked.

"No," Elliot corrected him. "I am taking my wife to lunch. I wont let her do anything concerned with work."

"I'll hold you to that," Cragen said patting her on the shoulder as he walked back toward his office. "We'll see you on Monday, Liv. Take care of yourself."

"I will."

A few hours later Olivia met Elliot out in front of the precinct. She slid over into the passengers seat of her black SUV to let him drive them to their surprise destination.

"So, are you going to tell me where we are going?"

"Nope."

"You're no fun. I don't even get a clue?"

"It isn't too far."

"That is all I get?"

"Yup."

Olivia laughed. Elliot drove toward the outskirts of the city and pulled into pricey subdivision not too far from the kids' new school.

"Are you window shopping?" she asked twirling a strand of hair around her fingertip as she smiled at him.

"What do you think of that one right there?" he asked pointing to a large two story house with a fenced back yard, two car garage and a carport.

"It is beautiful, Elliot."

He watched as Olivia rolled down her window to get a better look at the house.

"It is for sale."

She turned and looked at him over her shoulder.

"Can we afford it?"

"Probably not," he said as he pulled into the driveway.

"Then why are we here?"

"Open house. It doesn't hurt to look."

El, I am not so sure it is a good idea to go view a house we can't even afford in the first place."

"Hey, we can dream can't we?" he asked as he opened her car door for her. "A nice big yard. And the garage. It is only blocks from the school and not that far a drive to get to work."

"Yeah, I agree with you that it is a nice house."

"Hold that thought. Just do me a favor and keep an open mind. Even if we can't afford it, just looking could give us some ideas for the remodel."

"True."

"Shall we?" he asked slipping his hand into hers and leading her up the steps of the wrap around porch.

"It has a porch swing," she said pointing.

"Wait until you see the back yard."

"You have already seen this house? That is cheating."

Elliot laughed.

"Not all of it. I just read the add in the paper and pulled up into the driveway to look at the outside."

They walked into the front door and spoke for a moment with the woman from the real estate agency that was selling the house.

"The house has a finished basement with a living area on that floor. There are four bathrooms total in the house and one in the garage."

"The garage has a bathroom?"

"Not the garage, itself. But the apartment above it does."

"The garage has an apartment above it?" Elliot asked.

"It does."

"How many bedrooms?" Olivia asked.

"Two in the basement, the master bedroom and a smaller bedroom or office on this level and three bedrooms upstairs."

"Six bedrooms?" Olivia asked looking up the staircase.

"Seven if you use the smaller room, there. Eight if you count the apartment. It is completely closed off from the garage. You could use it as a guest house or the last owners rented it out."

Elliot and Olivia followed the woman through their dream house as she talked about the remodeling the previous owners had done before their divorce. Now the couple were in the middle of a bitter battle to divide up the properties. When the couple could not agree who got what, the judge ordered them to sell all properties and divide the profit. Now this beautiful house was listed on the market for a price much lower than it should have been.

"This house is a must sell, right now. Our agency has three different agents working to sell this property. The couple selling cannot finalize their divorce and to do that, all of the property must be sold first. I do have to tell you that we have had a few other couples seriously interested. Do you have a large family?"

"We do," Olivia said with a smile as she looked at Elliot. "We have five children."

"Well, this house is definitely big enough to accommodate five children. And I will show you something else that are bound to love," she said leading them through the sliding glass door off the dining room and onto the patio.

"It has a pool," Olivia said a little shocked. "I am officially in love with this house."

"I told you that you would like it," Elliot said with a smile.

"It's beautiful, Elliot."

"It's perfect," he replied.

"It is," she agreed staring into the crystal blue water of the swimming pool.

"The pool also has a locking gate, it you have little ones."

"We do," Elliot said to the woman.

"And the privacy fence around the back yard. You could have some really nice summer barbeques back here. Or birthday parties?"

"What is the lowest you could go on this house?" Elliot asked.

They watched as the woman wrote a number on a slip of paper and handed it to him.

"Wow," he replied.

"I assure you, that price is well below market value. In this neighborhood and this close to the city. That is a steal."

"It is just a bit out of our price range," Elliot said as they walked around the porch to sit on the swing and look out across the yard.

"Mr. Stabler, if you would like to make an offer…."

"Could we have a minute to think about it?" Olivia asked, cutting the woman off.

"Sure," she agreed. "I need to go inside and pack up my things from the open house. I will be here for a little while if you have any questions. Feel free to walk around and take another look."

"Thank you," Olivia said with a smile as the woman walked inside. "What do you think?" she asked.

"I think it is a great house. It is big enough and so close to the school. And it is reasonably priced. Unfortunately that price is several grand out of my reach. Even if I sell the house in queens, I don't know if that will be enough. And this is the kind of deal that will be gone before too long. This house isn't going to sit empty for too long at that price."

Elliot walked around with Olivia for a moment looking around. They walked across the porch and down the steps onto the carport beside the house. Olivia looked out across the yard and studied the real estate company sign in the front yard. She tilted her head slightly to get a better look at the picture of the agent on the sign.

"Ted Bradigan," she read as she stared at it.

"She said there are several agents trying to sell this house. Do you know him?"

"Sort of."

"Sort of?"

"I used to know him. We haven't spoken in years."

Elliot pulled a pen from his shirt pocket and handed it to her. He watched as Olivia opened her palm and write down the man's number and extension.

"You're gonna call him?"

"It doesn't hurt to try, right?"

"Yeah," Elliot agreed.

Olivia exhaled softly and Elliot watched as she seemed distracted.

"How about some lunch?" Elliot asked.

"Sounds great. I am starving."

Two days later, Elliot had been forced to cancel on lunch with Olivia and Ted Bradigan the day before to help Fin out with an interrogation that kept him late and he ended up sleeping in the cribs.

"What do you want?" Olivia asked as she sat down at the table across from the man.

"For starters, I would like to extend my deepest condolences in the loss of your mother. She was a good woman."

Olivia stared at the man.

"Thank you," she replied.

"I have not seen you in a long time."

"Twenty three years."

"How have you been? You look well."

"I'm fine," she said combing her fingers through her hair. "Would you mind if we went ahead and got down to business?"

"Not at all. I figured there must be a really good reason for me to get a call from you after all of these years. For a moment I thought it was a mistake when my secretary handed me the message with your name on it."

"It isn't a mistake. I have come here to ask something of you."

"You don't have anymore crazy accusations?"

"I don't want to talk about any of that. Not now, not ever. Especially not with you. What I want is a matter of business. If I had any other means of getting this, I would use them. But I don't."

"What do you want?"

"There is a house. 1622 Sparrow Lane."

"Ahh. Nice piece of property."

"I want to buy it. We, my husband and I."

"There is a husband?"

"There is. But I am about to ask you a favor. This is the one and only time I will ever ask anything at all of you. In return, I need you to grant me this one big favor. When this business deal is complete, you will never hear from me again."

The man stared at her for a moment considering her proposition.

"I'm listening," he said in a stern voice.

"I want you to sell me that house without your commission."

"And what makes you think I would do something like that?"

"You owe me. I know a few things about your past that I am sure the entire state of New York would live to know about the _real estate king _of Manhattan. Like the fact that he likes to do sick things to little girls."

"You wouldn't! That would ruin me."

Olivia stared at him without blinking.

"I do this for you, what are you going to do for me? That is a huge loss on my part."

"Not nearly as huge as if you didn't do it."

"Come on, Livy."

"Do not call me that!"

"I used to always call you that."

"I'm not a child."

"What would you like me to call you?"

"Detective," Olivia answered laying her badge on the table in front of him.

She watched for a moment as his jaw dropped.

"Still. This is a huge financial loss for myself and for the company. I will need some kind of compensation."

"What do you want?" she asked trying not to show her panic in her voice.

He thought for a moment tapping his fingertips on the table.

"Your mother had an apartment."

"Yes."

"And when she died, it was left to you?"

"It was."

"I want Serena's Fifth Avenue apartment."

"Why do you want her apartment?"

"Well, lets be fair here. I did pay for it after all. It was part of the settlement. And it is a valuable piece of real estate. I have connections, I could easily turn a handsome profit from property in that neighborhood."

"I don't know. I grew up in that apartment."

"I will purchase it from you, of course. That house isn't going to last long on the market. You and I both know that. You sign over the apartment and that house is yours."

"What makes you think I trust you?"

"Fine, you can put in a bid….with the others. And in about three weeks you should hear something. Or you could finish up the paperwork this week and be moved in by the end of the month. Your choice."

"Okay, the apartment is yours."

"Hey, I'm a business man."

"You are a sleazy crook."

"Everyone's gotta make a living," he said shrugging his shoulders. "Same place for coffee tomorrow morning?"

"Okay," she agreed.

"Bring the deed."

"I will. And I swear if you even think about screwing me on this, the world will know your dirty little secret."

"A deal is a deal. And when this one is finished, I will hear nothing else about our little misunderstanding?"

Olivia bit her lip and shook her head.

"Agreed," she said as she picked up her keys and headed for the door.

_**THE NEXT AFTERNOON….**_

Elliot hadn't had the chance to talk to her since she had gone to meet with the man about the house and he was beginning to wonder if she had made any progress in the matter. After a few failed attempts at reaching Olivia on her cell phone he headed across town to see if he could catch her.

"Liv?" he called as he pushed open the door to Serena Benson's apartment. "Liv, are you here?"

"I'm in here," she called to him from the living room area.

"Hey, I have been trying to call you. Your phone goes right to voicemail. After I didn't get an answer on the house phone, I figured I might find you here."

"I must have turned my phone off. I figured I would come over here and get some more of this stuff boxed up."

Elliot watched as she carried a box across the room and placed it on the top of a stack.

"Wow, you keeping all of this stuff?"

"Donating it. There really isn't anything here I want to keep."

He watched as she pulled some books from the book case and tossed them into an empty box. Elliot had always known Olivia was a beautiful woman. Her skin had been gently kissed by the sun, her body slim and toned, her hair a chestnut blend of dark auburn and brunette and her eyes were the color of rich dark chocolate with little emerald flecks in them.

She was an exotic beauty with a heart of gold. But it wasn't until recently that Elliot had begun to realize just how beautiful she really was. Infact, until his old high school buddy Mike had pointed out what had been right in front of Elliot all of these years that he even began to see as the beautiful woman she was and not just one of the guys.

Elliot watched silently as she scurried around the room tossing random books and magazines into the box. Olivia had twisted her dark hair up into a clip on top her head and little strands fell loose framing her pretty face. She wore cut off blue jean shorts and a white tank top. Her toenails were painted in a soft pink polish and something about her bare feet on the hard wood floor made him smile as he noticed her flip-flop sandals in the corner of the room.

"Would you like some help?" he asked as she stood on her tip toes trying to reach some of the books on the top shelf.

"Thanks," she said with a smile as Elliot began to pull them down and hand them off to her.

"No problem. So how did lunch with the realtor go?"

"Well, umm….it didn't."

"Why? What happened?"

"Nothing happened. I just thought it would be better to wait until we could go together and talk to him."

"When you spoke to him, did he sound like he could help us?"

"I didn't actually speak to him. I left a voicemail. Then his secretary called me back and left a voicemail for me asking about lunch. I called her back to confirm and when you couldn't make it, I called her to cancel."

"Liv, you could have just gone. It would have been alright."

"I don't know, it just seemed strange meeting him to discuss business without you there. I thought since this will be your house, maybe you should actually be there when I talk to him."

"That works," Elliot said pulling another stack of books from the shelf. "Liv, this one is an album," he said opening the book to look at the pictures.

"Elliot, please….I don't want to do this now."

"Okay," he said closing the album. "What do you want me to do with it?"

"Throw it in the box."

"The donation box? Do you really think that someone else would want your mother's old pictures?"

"The Salvation Army will pick through it all and decide what they can use or re-sell."

"Olivia, these are family pictures. Your mother's family. You and your mother. Don't you think maybe you should hold on to this?"

"Elliot, you want to help, then throw it in the box. If you are just going to sit around here and question every move I make…. then maybe I should do this on my own," she said as she pulled the photo album from his hand to toss it into the box.

As she did a stack of loose photos and newspaper clippings fell out from between the pages scattering across the floor.

"Shit," she said kneeling to pick up the photos.

Elliot knelt beside her to help gather them.

"Jeez Liv, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to…." Elliot stopped in mid sentence as he noticed the face of a familiar stranger among the pictures. "That is the real estate guy. Your mother knew him?"

"Yeah. It was a really long time ago. I have not seen him in years."

"They were close?" he asked looking through a few of the pictures.

"They were married," she said sitting on the floor and pulling her knees to her chest.

"Not a good thing?" Elliot asked picking up the wedding pictures.

"I'd rather not think about it."

"Would this have anything to do with the reason you have been playing phone tag with this man for two days? And the reason your cell phone mysteriously turned itself off?"

"You got me. I don't want to go see him alone," she said shooting him her classic '_leave it alone' _look and Elliot could tell there was more to the story than what she was telling him.

"That is all you had to say, Liv. Do you want to talk about it?"

"No."

"Olivia?"

"No," she said again stuffing the pictures back into the album and tossing it into the box.

Elliot watched as she brushed tears from her face and combed her fingers through her hair.

"So?"

"So, what?" she asked looking at him as he tucked a strand of hair behind her ear.

"So, I don't believe you for a minute. This kind of looks like your _I need to talk _face to me. And I have known you long enough to know just about all of your faces. So….spill it. What is the deal with this guy? The _real estate king _of Manhattan used to be your stepfather?"

"They were only married a few years. I was just a kid."

Elliot's eyes widened as he watched her cautiously.

"They met in an A.A. meeting. Neither of them finished the program and they brought out the worst in each other. They would get drunk and fight and sometimes they would get violent."

"He hit her?"

"And she hit him."

"Did he ever hit you?"

Olivia stared into his eyes.

"He never hit me," she said softly.

But the look in her eyes told a different story.

"Liv?"

Elliot sat down in the floor and stared into her eyes.

"Tell me what he did."

"I have spent years and thousands of dollars in therapy trying to forget this man."

"Did it work?"

"Until I saw his face on that sign."

"Talk to me. I can't believe you never told me about him."

"Elliot, other than my therapist and my mother, I really haven't told anyone about him."

"Talk to me."

"It started when I was about eleven. He used to come into my bedroom at night."

"God Olivia. Did he….did he…."

She stared into his eyes for a moment as tears welled up in hers.

"I'll kill him!"

"No. He didn't…. But I'm sure that was where it was leading. He touched me and he was always watching me."

She was crying now, and Elliot wanted nothing more than to wrap his arms tight around her and hold her until the pain was gone.

"He molested you?"

He watched as she slowly nodded her head.

"You never told anyone?"

"I told my mother. That was when she left him. The marriage had been falling apart for a while and I guess that was the final straw."

"You never pressed charges?"

"I was eleven years old, Elliot. And he denied it. He told her that I must have been confused because I had never had affection from an adult male in my life until him. I pushed it to the back of my head for a while. Then I brought it up to my therapist a few years ago."

"You were already seeing the therapist?"

"My mother's idea. She said it was a good way to work out my hostilities toward her."

Elliot smiled.

"We don't have to get this house. I appreciate everything you have done for me and the kids. But to be completely honest I don't want you anywhere near this man."

"I lied to you, Elliot. I went to the restaurant and met him."

"What happened?"

"He said he was sorry to hear about my mother. And he was sorry he couldn't make it to the funeral. I tried to stick to business and mentioned the house."

"Olivia…."

"He said he could get us a deal, but he wanted something in return."

Elliot shook his head.

"He wanted this apartment."

"He wanted your mother's apartment?

"I met him this morning and signed the deed over. I deposited the check he gave me an hour ago and as a part of our deal, he agreed to drop his commission off the price of the house. That woman yesterday said that she could help sell the house in Queens. Between the two, that should put this house just inside our price range."

She looked up at him and Elliot realized exactly the sacrifice she had made for him.

"You sold him the apartment? Do you have any idea what this place is worth?"

"I do."

"And you sold it to that jerk to help me?"

"I sold it, because I wanted to sell it. That was what it took to get that judge off our backs. I did it….I did it to help my family," she said softly.

"You faced this monster from your childhood, this man who hurt you….to help me get a house so that we wont lose the kids. Olivia, that is bravest and most selfless thing I have ever heard of. Thank you."

"Your welcome," she said clearing her throat and wiping tears from her cheeks. "What was I going to do with this place anyway? I still have my apartment. You know for when…. D-day."

"D- day?"

Olivia laughed trying to lighten the mood.

"The day we file for divorce and you get your life back," she said with a sad smile. "D-day."

"D-day. Got it. Seriously though, I owe you so much. If there is ever anything I can do to repay you. Nothing will ever fully repay you, but if you ever need anything…."

"I know you are here," she said. "You are supposed to meet with the woman this evening to sign the paperwork and get the keys to your new house. We have thirty days to get moved in and be out of the house in Queens."

"The kids are going to flip out."

"Do you think they'll be upset about the move?"

"Maybe at first. It will be hard. They grew up in this hose and this is where they lived with their mother. But in able to keep us all together, we have to make some changes. And with the deal on this house, it is going to be cheaper and faster to move than to remodel. I think once we get the move out of the way and get settled, they will adjust to it. And eventually like it."

"I'm sure you're right. I was thinking, and I'm not sure what you would think of the idea. But we could talk to Maureen and see if maybe she would be interested in moving from the dorm into the apartment above the garage. She could still have her privacy and the freedom of her own place, but she would be closer to us and we would get to see her more."

"That is a good idea, Liv. She can help out more with the kids and I would save money not paying for a dorm room next semester. Her decision of course."

Olivia smiled.

"And we could even do some things to help give it a more personal touch, like helping her paint or helping her come up with some new furniture. This is an entire apartment, not just a room with a bed and a microwave like where she is living now."

"I think she is going to love this idea."

"Elliot, I don't want you to feel like I am making any of these decisions for you. You are their father. I just was trying to think of a few things that could help the kids cope with having to give up the home they shared with their mother. Maybe make this move a little easier on them. Maybe we could let them decorate their own rooms. A few small things to make them more personal, you know?"

"I think these are all good ideas. Olivia, legally, these are your kids now, too. Your opinion matters to me. And you have great ideas. For the next three months at least, this is your life, too. Of course I expect you to have a say in what happens. Just do me a favor?"

"What is that?"

"No more lies. Liv, I will never judge you. And I will always be here for you. But I need to know what is going on with you. If I had known any of the history with this man….I never would have let you meet up with him alone. I would have been there for you."

"You would have been if you could have. I know that."

"You don't understand. Being there with you, for you, should have taken precedence over sitting in a room and watching Fin run an interrogation. This family comes first, above everything else. Olivia, you are a big part of this family now."

"No more secrets," she said softly. "I promise."

"Good," he said kissing her forehead. "Because you know that is only going to make me worry more about you."

"You don't have to worry about me. I have had a bit of a rough time lately, but I will be fine."

"I know, you're a tough guy."

She laughed.

"But Liv, tough guys have bad days, too. I just want you to know that I am right here and no matter what the problem, I will always be here to help you sort it out."

"You always have been," she said softly.

"What do you say I finish helping you pack up this box, then I buy us some ice cream to celebrate? I just bought a house!"

"That sounds great."

"And I really think that you should hold on to this one," he said pulling the album from the box. "I'll even go through it and pull out all of his pictures to go out with the recycling if you want. But someday you are going to have kids of your own and you may want to tell them about their grandmother. They might like to see these pictures."

"I guess you're right," she agreed sitting the album back on the desk and folding the lid shut on the box.

Two weeks later they had moved into the new house. They were still living out of boxes and not quite unpacked, but they were beginning to make this house a home. Maureen had packed up her things and moved into the garage apartment and Olivia had helped her decorate it. The kids had been a little disappointed about the move at first, but quickly realized that the bigger place provided much more space for the family and allowed each child their own room.

Olivia had been back at work for just over two days now and Cragen had been babying her just a bit, keeping her close to the station for the most part. Things really seemed to be working out for the new Stabler family and at their last court appointment, the judge seemed very pleased with the progress they were making as a family.

The end of summer was just around the corner and the judge would soon decide who got to keep the kids through out the school year. If he approved of Elliot and Olivia's arrangement, he would grant them custody and they would undergo a ninety day probationary period. After full custody was given back to Elliot and things returned to normal, he and Olivia would sit down and decide when to take the next step, D-day. But for now, everything was right on schedule.

Elliot was sitting at his desk when Olivia's cell phone rang for about the fourth time today. He watched as she picked it up and hit ignore, then returned her attention to the document she had been working on.

"I don't like this," she said staring at her phone.

"I don't really like it much either. But there isn't much I can do about it. I can't change my number, because of work."

"Ignoring it isn't going to put a stop to it either. Do you even know what he wants?"

"The last voicemail I bothered to listen to said something about getting together for lunch. After that I just delete them after I hear the number and don't even listen to the messages anymore."

"That is harassment."

"He will stop, El. It is kind of my fault for contacting him after all of these years anyway. But I didn't see any other way to get what I needed without making that call. Just ignore him and eventually he will crawl back into the woodwork with all of the other roaches."

Elliot exhaled and stared down at her phone as it began to vibrate once more.

Later as Olivia was returning from court she heard a familiar voice from behind her.

"Olivia, I have been trying to reach you."

She turned around to see Ted standing behind her holding a dozen roses in a vase.

"These are for you," he said reaching to hand them to her.

"Ted, I appreciate this, I really do. But it has to stop. The terms of our agreement were clear. It was a business deal. After the details about the apartment and the house were ironed out you and I were not supposed to have any other contact. That was part of the deal."

Olivia turned to walk away from the man, but as she did he grabbed her by the arm.

"What are you doing?" she called out as she dropped the vase of roses shattering it all over the floor. "You're hurting me," she said trying to twist free of his grip.

"I just want to talk to you. Just have lunch with me. One lunch. Just to talk, that is it."

"I don't want to talk to you. I don't ever want to see you again!"

From out of nowhere, Elliot punched Ted in the face sending him flying backwards into the wall.

"You broke my nose!" the man shouted at him as blood poured into his hands.

"You ever touch her again and I will break your fucking neck!" Elliot shouted as he shoved the man back against the wall once again.

"What the hell is your problem, mister?"

"My problem? What is _my_ problem? My problem is you! And the fact that you will not stop harassing my wife! My problem is the fact that she trusted you and you hurt her! How could you? She was a child. You were supposed to be her father, you were supposed to protect her. Get the hell out of here and I swear to God if I ever find out you came within two hundred yards of her, I will kill you."

"You'll hear from my attorney," the man mumbled with blood still pouring from his nose.

"Yeah, you tell him to give me a call. And when we get to court I will have a really interesting conversation with the judge about why I hit you in the first place. You know the transcripts from court cases become public record. Anyone who cares to look will know the secret you have been hiding all of these years."

Elliot watched as the man gathered himself and came to his senses.

"I never should have touched you," he said looking at Olivia. "I was sick and I was a drunk, but that was no excuse. I had a problem and I got treatment for it. I have been calling you, I came here to apologize and to tell you that I know that what I did to you was wrong. I know that. I just wanted the chance to admit to you, to say out loud that I know I hurt you and I am sorry. The flowers were supposed to be an apology."

"You've spoke your peace," Elliot said stepping in front of the man so he could no longer see Olivia. "Now get the hell out of here. And don't think for a moment I didn't mean what I said."

Ted looked up at him as he nodded his head, then turned and walked away.

Elliot turned around to look at Olivia now sitting curled up against the wall crying.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah," she almost breathed as she drew a staggered breath.

"He will never hurt you again," Elliot said softly wiping away the tears from her face.

He scooted in beside Olivia and slipped his arm around her hugging her tight.

"You're safe now. He shouldn't bother you anymore. I think I made my point pretty clearly."

"El, you broke his nose. What if that judge finds out?"

"Don't you worry about that. I have a feeling that Bradigan took a tumble down some stairs or something and that is how he broke his nose. I really don't see him dragging all of this out in public. He has too much to lose. I meant what I said. If he ever comes near you again, I'll kill him."

Olivia took a deep breath as Fin stepped out of the elevator.

"What happened here?" he asked looking at the shattered glass and red roses scattered in the hall.

"I dropped them," Olivia said looking up at him.

"You alright?" Fin asked reaching for her hand to help her to her feet.

"Yeah, I just had a moment. I needed to sit down, I'm fine now."

"Maybe she came back a little too soon," he said reaching to help Elliot up as well.

"She's alright, Fin. She just need to take a moment. Everything is fine now. You go on back inside," Elliot said kissing Olivia's forehead. "I'll get this cleaned up," he said as he tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and stared into her eyes. "Don't you worry about a thing."

"Thanks El," she whispered squeezing his hand as she softly kissed his cheek.

Fin held the door open for her and Elliot watched until she was safely back in the squad room, then he knelt to puck up the shards of broken glass and the dozen broken promises that Ted Bradigan had made to her all of those years ago.


	9. 9 Never Give Up

_**Playing House**_

_**(Chapter Nine: Never Give Up)**_

"**Hey," Olivia said softly as she climbed onto the edge of the bed.**

"**Hey," Elliot replied watching as she dried her damp locks with a towel. "You alright?"**

"**Yeah, today just brought up a lot of things I didn't think I would ever have to deal with."**

"**Liv, I am so sorry for everything that he did to you. That man was supposed to be a father to you. He was supposed to protect you."**

"**If it's alright with you, El….I'd rather not talk about it right now."**

"**Alright. But you know that I am always here if you ever decide you do want to talk about it. I'm a pretty good listener."**

**Olivia forced a smile and looked at him with tears in her eyes.**

"**Yeah, you are," she agreed. **

"**I still cannot believe the deal you got us on that house," Elliot said clearing his throat and trying to lighten the mood.**

"**It is perfect for this family. You said it your self. We get moved in and settled, the kids start their new school and that judge wont have any reason to bother you anymore."**

"**Than you will have your life back," Elliot replied feeling a small ache in his heart at the thought of her leaving.**

"**What life? It isn't like I am missing out on anything great, while we are here playing house."**

"**Playing house?"**

**Olivia smiled.**

"**Yeah, kind of. You know like children do. Pretending to be the mother and the father with a house and children."**

"**I guess you're right. Only as adults it is much more complicated."**

"**Everything is much more complicated when you're an adult."**

"**Yeah."**

**They spent every free moment of the next week moving into the new house and getting things set up for the children to visit. After spending their first weekend in the new house with the kids, it was hard to say goodbye when they dropped the kids back off at their aunts. **

**Monday afternoon Elliot and Olivia were called to help with a reported bomb threat at a local area high school. The students were all removed and the area was checked and cleared by the bomb squad, but now they were having to help interview some of the students to try and figure out who called in the bomb threat.**

"**There are over six hundred students on this list and Cragen wants us to talk to them all."**

"**We are going to be here all day," Olivia said turning the page to look at the second half of the list.**

"**I have an idea," Elliot said taking the list from her and pulling off the top two pages. "Here, if we split up we will get this done faster. I will meet you back here in a couple of hours."**

"**Alright," she said taking her half of the list and heading down the hallway. **

**For four hours Olivia interviewed student after student with no clues as to who called in the bomb threat. She felt her phone vibrate in her pocket as she finished up questioning a girl. She exhaled and answered the phone as she stood up and made her way into the hall for a little privacy.**

"**Hey El," she said holding the phone against her cheek with her shoulder. **

"**Hey, any luck?"**

"**Nope. You?"**

"**Nada. Listen, the lunch rush is about to start and I am not a big fan of cafeteria food," he said as a bell rang and the hall around her began to flood with students, "what do you say we take a break. We can grab some lunch and pick things back up later."**

"**Sounds good to me," she said noticing a boy and his girlfriend fighting.**

**She studied the couple as their discussion heated and they began to shout at each other.**

"**Liv?"**

"**Yeah?" she replied still unable to tear her attention from them, something just didn't feel right.**

"**I said I just wrapped things and am headed out to the parking lot, I will meet you out front in five minutes."**

**Olivia tipped her head and watched as things around her seemed to move momentarily in slow motion.**

"**Olivia? Liv, are you there?"**

**She nodded her head, but couldn't speak. She pressed her lips together and drew a nervous breath as the hair on her arms began to stand on end, something was very wrong here. Just then the girl screamed at her boyfriend and slammed her locker shut. That was when it happened.**

**The explosion was so loud and so hard it shook the entire building. Elliot was standing in the parking lot in front of the school when he heard the blast. He looked over his shoulder as the thick cloud of black smoke began to clear and the pile of rubble that used to be the east wing of the high school was now visible.**

"**Olivia?" Elliot shouted into the phone, but the call had been disconnected. "Shit, call 911!" he shouted to some students gathering near by. "Everybody back up to the back of the parking lot." **

**Olivia groaned and her eyes fluttered open as she felt water dripping over her. She took a deep breath and looked up above her at the debris. Her ears were ringing and her head was killing her. She tried to sit up, but she felt really dizzy.**

**Olivia heard the crash of thunder outside as rain began to pour. She pushed herself up onto her elbows to look around her as the rain started to soak her from above. She shifted her body, pushing broken pieces of beam carefully out of her way until she was able to crawl out of the little hole she had woke up in and out into what was left of the building.**

**The room was dark and the smoke was heavy. In the corner a few small flames still burned. Scattered around the hall were bodies of high school students that had perished in the blast. She crawled around feeling each of them for a pulse, but it was too late. **

"**Hello?" she called out, coughing as the sting of smoke filled her lungs. "Can anyone hear me?"**

**But no one answered. She was trapped and alone and surrounded by death. She took a deep breath and crawled along the floor trying to find some way out.**

"**Hello?" Elliot shouted as he sifted carefully through debris hoping to find anyone still alive. **

**He hoped to find anyone, but in the back of his mind there was really only one someone he thought about. He tried not to think of her, but she was the only thing on his mind. Elliot pushed back the tears rising in his eyes and choked back the emotion threatening to break him as he sifted for the remains of his second wife.**

**The night had gone on for hours and the volunteers had pulled the bodies of nearly sixty teachers and high school students from the rubble, but had found no one alive. Elliot's heart ached like a bullet in his chest as each victim was revealed and still there was no word from her.**

**Olivia sat in the floor and looked at the remains of the hallway around her. The explosion had completely reduced the locker area to rubble and the high ceiling had partially collapsed and was being held up by only one broken beam, this place could cave in at any time. She looked up and down the hallway trying to decide the best plan of action. The section on the other side of the lockers where the classrooms were looked to have completely fallen in and she was sure she would find no way out in that direction.**

**She was exhausted and scared and as badly as she just wanted to sit down and cry for the death that surrounded her now, the cop inside her wouldn't allow it. Instead she drew a deep breath and turned back in the direction she had come from just before the bomb detonated.**

**Down the hall and through two large double doors was the gymnasium. The large room was held up by many support beams and was likely to be less effected by the explosion. Maybe from here she could find the best way out or a safe place to wait for help to arrive.**

**Elliot worked with a team as the attempted to sift through the area of Olivia's last know whereabouts. He wasn't sure if she was even alive, but something wouldn't allow him to give up on her until he knew for sure. **

"**We have to keep going," he said as a few of the search and rescue team members seemed to slow in their search.**

"**It has been eight hours. It is dark and this area isn't stable. The more people we send in, the more we risk losing. I'm sorry about your partner Detective, but I cannot allow any more people to enter the area at least until daybreak. It just isn't safe," the sheriff said as his men stared at Elliot.**

"**She isn't just my partner," Elliot snarled as he snatched the flashlight from the man's hand, "she's my wife. And I am not leaving here until I find her. Dead or alive, she is coming out of here with me. Now you're not going to help me find her, then just get the hell out of the way and I will do it myself!"**

**The men all turned to watch the sheriff as if waiting for his permission as Elliot shook his head and walked further into the rubble. One man took a deep breath and shook his head as he walked after Elliot.**

"**You can't go in there alone, Detective Stabler," he said reaching for Elliot's arm.**

**Elliot turned around frustrated enough to shoot the man if he tried to stop him.**

"**Let me help you."**

"**Thank you," Elliot said looking over at the rest of the Sheriff's men. "What about him?"**

"**He's right, it is too dangerous. But you're right, too. If she is inside and she is injured, she needs our help. We can't just leave her in there alone and you are never going to find her without help."**

"**I appreciate it," Elliot said with a nod. "What about the dogs? If I find something of hers, could they get her scent and help us find her?"**

"**They could, but…."**

"**But what?" Elliot asked confused.**

"**They are cadaver dogs. You don't want them to find her. I think I know a way inside, come on."**

**Elliot gulped and wiped away a tear as he followed the man around to what used to be the far side of the building.**

**Four more hours passed and the was about to rise. Over a hundred bodies had been found in the rubble and only ten survivors. So far, no one had seen Olivia. Elliot searched until he had run out of places to search, but still refused to give up on her.**

"**Why don't we take a break, man?"**

"**What?" Elliot asked wiping the sweat from his forehead.**

"**Not a long one. Just a few minutes to grab a cup of coffee and gather our thoughts. Then I will come right back in here with you and help you find her, I promise. I just think we could both use a few minutes and some caffeine. It will help us concentrate on finding Olivia."**

**Elliot stared at the man for a moment then nodded slowly.**

"**Just long enough for a cup of coffee."**

"**Then we are right back in here until we find her. I promise."**

**The men were exhausted and running on adrenaline alone, even that was about to run out. They walked back around to the place where volunteers had now set up tables with food and drinks for the search and rescue workers. Elliot got a cup of coffee and took a seat for a moment, staring at the pile of rubble, only then allowing himself to realize that he may never see her again.**

"**I'm gonna go get new batteries put in our flashlight," the man said looking at the tired look in Elliot's eyes. "We gotta be prepared when we go back in there. I will be right back."**

**Elliot stood beside the table staring at the building. It was still dusk as the sun was just beginning to peek over the horizon. Smoke was still rising from the building and it had been hours since a live victim had been found and many of the search team members were giving up hope of finding people alive. But Elliot couldn't give up. He had to find her.**

**Elliot ran his hands over the back of his head and stretched, trying to wake up.**

"**I got new batteries and another flashlight," the man said as he returned from the supply station they had set up in the parking lot. "The sun is coming up, we should get back inside."**

**They began to walk toward the building as the rain began to fall once more. Elliot stopped in his tracks as he noticed something ahead of them emerging from the smoke. The form moved slowly and seemed a bit disheveled. Elliot's breath caught in his chest as he watched paramedics rush to the woman's side. They moved her quickly to the back of the ambulance and began to look her over.**

**He stood unable to move. He had to see her, he had to know. Could this frail figure that escaped from the rubble be Olivia? **

"**Detective Stabler?" the man said as Elliot raised his hand, but couldn't break his attention from the back of the ambulance.**

**He had to see this woman's face. He watched for a few moments as they wrapped a blanket around the woman. She was soaked from the rain and covered in soot and ash. She stood up as another volunteer handed her a cup of coffee to help bring her body temperature back up. **

**Miraculously, she seemed to be doing alright and as she spoke to the volunteers about a man she had come there with. The woman looked worried, but unharmed for the most part as her eyes scanned the crowd frantically looking for her friend. When she saw Elliot standing there, she dropped her cup of coffee. **

**Their eyes meet and they stared at each other for a moment from across the parking lot as he began to walk to her. Her bottom lip quivered a bit as he approached her. He had never been so happy to see anyone in his life.**

"**Oh thank God," Elliot said as he pulled her tight into his arms and the tears he had been fighting back all night began to stream uncontrollably down his face. He held her there in his arms for a few moments and kissed her forehead. **

"**I was so worried about you," he said softly as their eyes met again.**

**He could see the exhaustion in her eyes when she looked into him. Elliot smoothed his thumb over the curve of her jaw as he stared lovingly into her pretty brown eyes. What happened next seemed beyond their control as he leaned forward and kissed her tenderly. That kiss was like nothing either of them had ever felt before.**

**Olivia stared at him, still unable to speak as her tears began to fall as well. Elliot pulled her into him and held her tight, trying to comfort her as he kissed the top of her head.**

"**You're safe now," he whispered. "And I am never going to let anything bad happen to you ever again.**

**The emergency crew insisted she be checked out at the hospital and Elliot rode in the back of the ambulance with his wife across town. After several x-rays and tests had come back proving only minor injuries, the doctor gave Olivia some pain medication for a fractured wrist and released her into her husbands care.**

**Back at home Olivia barely spoke two words to him. Elliot longed to hear her voice, but he knew what she must be going through and decided she would speak to him in time. Olivia soaked in a long hot bath, while Elliot used the shower in the main bathroom to get cleaned up. Afterward she slipped into a cotton gown and a bath robe. Elliot stood across the room watching as she brushed her hair in front of the vanity. **

"**Are you alright?" he asked as her eyes met his in the mirror.**

"**Yeah, just a little sore," she said as she laid the brush on the dresser.**

"**The doctor said you would probably be really sore tomorrow."**

"**I'll be okay," she said softly shifting her eyes to look up at him.**

**Elliot stared into her eyes.**

"**Liv," he said shaking his head and choking back tears once more. "I was so scared. I thought I'd lost you."**

**Elliot watched as a tear slid down her cheek. He raised his fingertips to guide her mouth to his and kissed her again. Elliot moved his hands up gently under her robe pushing it into the floor. He laid her back on the bed and kissed her slowly and passionately and before long they were naked in bed together and about to make love.**

"**Elliot," she whispered softly as she stared up at him. "Are you sure you want to do this?"**

"**I'm not sure of anything anymore," he whispered as she stared at him, "except that I need you."**

**Olivia smoothed her palm over his muscular chest and could feel his heart pounding. **

"**I just don't want you to do anything that you are going to regret," she said softly.**

"**Olivia, I want to. I would have to be crazy not to want to."**

**She smiled a sweet smile.**

"**I know that you still struggle with losing Kathy. And if you are not ready for anything like this, I understand. I wouldn't be upset or anything. We could just lay here together, if you want."**

"**Is that what you want?"**

**Olivia held the sheet to her body and sat up to look at him.**

"**Not really. But I want you to be happy, more than anything."**

"**Liv, being here with you makes me happy," he said tracing his fingertip over the fallen of her lips as he raised up to kiss her again.**

**The next morning Elliot woke up with his wife naked in his arms. He reached over to the night stand and shut off the alarm before it sounded. He closed his arm tighter around Olivia and kissed the top of her head, unsure of where things would go from here, but sure this was exactly where they were supposed to be.**

**Olivia raised her head to look into his eyes.**

"**Hey," she whispered softly. "Are you okay?"**

"**Yeah, I'm amazing."**

"**Amazing?" she asked.**

"**I just made love to my wife for the first time," he whispered tracing his thumb over her cheek and kissing her again. "How do you feel?" he asked holding her tight.**

"**I'm good," she said laying her head back down against his chest.**

"**Did you sleep good?"**

"**I slept wonderfully."**

"**I was thinking, after all of the stuff that went on yesterday….maybe I would take today off and stay here with you. I'm sure Cragen would understand. We could just lay around and rest up, maybe order some take out."**

**Olivia smiled at his best attempt to keep this from being weird.**

"**That sounds good."**

"**Liv, I don't think I have ever been as scared as I was yesterday. I was so afraid I would never see you again."**

"**I stumbled around inside that building for a little while, unsure if I was dead or alive. There were kids dead all around me and….all I could think about was if you made it out alright."**

"**I was standing in the parking lot beside the car when the bomb went off. Then I went back in looking for you. Every time they pulled out a body I held my breath, praying it wasn't you. Then the search party wanted to give up, they said it was too dangerous to search in the dark."**

"**You had to do what you had to do," she said softly.**

"**You're exactly right. I took the sheriff's flashlight and one of his men helped me continue looking. I didn't give up. I wouldn't give up, I couldn't. I knew if it was me inside you would never give up trying to find me. I wasn't about to walk away and leave you trapped inside. How did you get out?"**

"**After a while I guess the cop instincts kicked in. I remembered there being a large gymnasium at the end of the hall. I went back that way, but it was falling in as well. I found my way into a locker room and it had a fire exit. When I opened the door I was standing in a pile of debris and it started raining again. I could see the sun coming up and that was when I realized that I was going to be okay. They said a lot of kids died."**

"**They found over a hundred bodies. Many of the students and staff were safely evacuated after the blast, but most of the people in that building didn't make it, Liv. You were one of only eleven survivors. Some of them were in really bad shape. They will probably want you to come back in for a statement."**

**She curled up against him and nestled her cheek against his chest as Elliot tightened his arm around her.**

"**But for right now I think we should just rest and relax a little. You have been through a lot," Elliot said kissing her once more.**

"**Thank you, Elliot. For not giving up on me."**

"**You are my wife, my partner and my family. I love you, Olivia. I will never give up on you." **

"**I love you too El," she said with tears in her eyes. "I'll never give up on you either," she said softly as she kissed him. "I promise."**

**Elliot pulled her in against him and kissed her tenderly as they made love for the second time.**


	10. 10 Happy

_Playing House_

_(Chapter Ten: Happy)_

"That was….," Olivia paused for a moment wrapping the sheet tightly around her nude body as she climbed from the bed.

"Incredible?" Elliot boasted with a smile.

"Inappropriate," she answered staring at the floor as she made her way to the closet to grab some clothes.

"What?" Elliot mumbled realizing regret had set in.

They had spent all of the day before curled up in bed together, just holding each other. Kissing and touching and talking. They had made a dozen confessions to each other between those sheets, like it was their own little piece of heaven. Elliot held her so tight as he stared into her eyes and told her how blessed he was to have her in his life. He kissed her tenderly and they made love again, just before she drifted off to sleep in his arms.

It was all like a dream. A wonderful dream that ended all too soon when the alarm clock went off this morning. And brought them back to the real world. A world full of rules and guidelines, pressures and complications. Not to mention the five blue eyed children and the judge who were all counting on the two of them to make this work. Elliot couldn't blame her for being scared, there was so much at stake. But it didn't really seem like they could just walk away from this….whatever it was between them after the events of the last couple of days.

"Liv," Elliot said softly as she walked out of the closet fastening the belt on her black slacks.

"Elliot, you'd better get moving or we're going to be late."

"Cragen can wait."

"Not Cragen El," she said raising her eyes to meet his for the first time all morning. "We are supposed to be in court today. That social worker is supposed to give him her report on the house and the life we have made here for the kids. It really isn't going to look good if we are late."

Elliot stared at her for a moment as if pleading for her to say something about last night.

"I'll be ready in a minute."

Olivia nodded and headed to the kitchen. Elliot dressed quickly and walked into the kitchen as well.

She stood at the counter making breakfast for her husband. "Black, just the way you like it," she said handing him a travel mug.

"We should talk."

"We don't have time," she said grabbing the car keys from the table by the door as they walked toward the elevator.

"We can make time, this is important."

"Elliot, this really isn't a good time. We need to concentrate," she stared at him for a moment and blinked her dark eyes.

"Daddy," Elizabeth called as she rushed down the steps of the courthouse to hug her father.

"Hey guys," Elliot replied handing out hugs and kisses to all of the children.

"We missed you dad," Dickie said.

"We missed you too Liv," Maureen said with a smile.

"It's good to see you guys," Olivia said taking Eli from Kathleen as he reached for her.

"I missed you all so much," Elliot said kissing his youngest son.

"Can we go home with you guys today?" Elizabeth asked.

"Well, honey, we have to go in here and see what this judge says," he said tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. "I am sure we will have you guys home really soon."

"Good. I miss living with you."

"You don't like aunt Kate's house?"

"It's okay. But we wanna live with you and Olivia."

"Well," Olivia said standing and extending her hand to Elizabeth, "lets go inside and see what the judge says."

Elizabeth smiled and slipped her hand into Olivia's as they continued up the steps and into the building.

After court Elliot and Olivia sat with the children in an Italian restaurant for lunch. It was good to share a little family time again, but Elliot still worried about what was going on behind Olivia's pretty brown eyes. All he wanted was to love her, but what if he had actually managed to push her further away?

"Can we go home with you guys today?" Elizabeth asked taking a sip of her soda.

"Well sweetheart, the judge said that you have to finish out the school week at your Aunt Kate's. But this weekend we can get you guys all settled in."

"We get to move in this weekend?" Dickie asked.

"You sure do buddy," Elliot assured him. "You will still spend every other weekend with your aunt Kate and uncle Jim and have dinner with them on Tuesday nights."

"Do we have to?" Kathleen asked staring at her father.

"You do for now. Those were the terms the judge gave us."

"If that is what it takes to bring the family back together Kathleen, it isn't that bad," Maureen insisted.

"Yeah, it would be worth dealing with them a couple of days a month if we get to move back in with dad," Dickie agreed.

"A few more days guys," Elliot said kissing Eli. "A few more days and we will all be together again. We can go this. In a few more months this judge will be off our backs for good and we won't have to worry about anyone ever keeping us apart again."

He looked around the table at the looks on the faces of his wife and children and could not imagine his life with out them.

"How is school?" he said clearing his throat and trying not to get emotional.

"Good," Elizabeth said.

"What are your favorite subjects in school?" Olivia asked.

"English," Elizabeth replied with a smile.

"Science," Dickie said.

"I really liked Science, too. What about you Kathleen?"

Kathleen just stared at her plate and stirred around her food.

"School is school. It sucks."

"Kathleen," Elliot said as she raised her eyes to look at him and then back to Olivia.

"My Art class is kind of cool, I guess."

"Your principal said that your grades are really improving and you have not missed any school at all in the last few weeks."

"Now you're checking up on me?"

"I'm your father, it's my job."

"Anything else you'd like to know?" she asked.

"No. But there is something I'd like you to know."

"What's that?" Kathleen asked just knowing she was about to get a stern talk about her attitude.

"I'm proud of you."

Kathleen raised her eyes to meet her father's as a smile slowly spread across her face.

"Thanks, dad."

At home that evening Olivia didn't say much. She soaked in a long hot bath and pretty much avoided even being in the same room as Elliot.

When Elliot came into the bedroom, Olivia was already in bed. Elliot climbed in beside her and rolled over to see her turned away from him.

"Liv? Are you asleep already?" he asked softly knowing she was avoiding this conversation.

"Hmm?" she moaned softly.

"I was kind of hoping we could talk."

"El," she said softly rolling to look at him over her shoulder, "I'm really tired."

"I know it's been a long day, but I think it is important we talk about this. You can't keep avoiding me when we sleep in the same bed every night."

"I'm not…" Olivia paused as her eyes met his.

"Talk to me. You are my best friend and that is more important than anything. If there is something wrong….if something is bothering you….I want us to work it out."

Olivia rolled over to face him, but didn't say anything.

"You regret it?" he asked.

"It should have never happened," she said softly.

"Liv, please don't do this. Don't push me away and shut me out."

"It was…."

"Amazing," Elliot said cutting her off.

"Irresponsible," she corrected him. "We are here for the kids. We are doing this for the kids. We can't get distracted with hot sex, Elliot. We have to focus on what is best for the kids."

Elliot smiled.

"So, you agree the sex was good?"

"El," Olivia whined fighting off his attempt to make her crack a smile.

"I know. And you are right. Maybe the timing wasn't the best, but we talked about this before it ever happened. We discussed this and decided this was what we both wanted."

"Yes."

"We can't undo the things we have done and we can't unsay the things we said."

"I don't regret it, Elliot. I just don't think that this is the right time for any of this."

"I told you I loved you. You said it back, Olivia. I know you well enough to know that you wouldn't have said it if you didn't mean it."

"I meant every word that I said. Every moment of that night was real. Of course I care for you, Elliot, you are my best friend. You and these kids….you guys are my family. There isn't anything I wouldn't do for any of you. I don't regret it. I just think that maybe we got emotional because of the circumstances, we got emotional and we got carried away. We gave in to the temptation we have been fighting for years and the sex was amazing, but this isn't about us. Elliot, this marriage….this relationship….this is about doing whatever it takes to keep this family together."

"I completely agree."

"You do?"

"Of course."

"Then you will understand when I tell you that no matter how incredible the sex was, it cannot happen again."

Elliot just stared at her for a moment then laid back on his pillow and stared up at the ceiling.

"I just thought maybe we could give this a real shot," he mumbled.

"Maybe in another time and place, but we have too much riding on this relationship to take a risk like this."

"A risk?"

"Elliot, what if we went for it? What if we tried this….whatever it is out and it went bad? What if it ruined us? What you and I have always had would be nothing more than….than…." she paused for a moment. "How awkward would it be living together and trying to uphold this image we have worked so hard to create? One mistake, Elliot. One mistake is all it would take and that judge would take your kids away forever. That is just too much pressure for a fledgling relationship. Please tell me you understand this."

"I understand."

Olivia stared at him as she pressed her lips together nervously.

"I'm sorry," she said softly.

"What do you have to be sorry about?"

"I knew I didn't want this and I let it happen anyway. I was out of line. I lost my focus and I'm sorry. We can't mess this up."

"Are we okay?" Elliot asked.

Olivia smiled a soft smile as she settled into her pillow.

"Yeah," she whispered.

"Good," he replied. "I could never forgive myself if anything ever damaged our relationship."

"We're okay, El. I'm just really tired."

"Get some sleep, sweetheart."

Olivia rolled over to face the wall as she tried to go to sleep. All of a sudden, sleep wasn't coming as easily as it usually did. This was going to be a long night.

The rest of the week passed quickly and before they knew it Elliot and Olivia were helping the children get settled into their new rooms.

"What do you guys think?" Elliot asked the girls as he helped to carry the last of their boxes into the house.

"It's great dad. It's just nice for us all to be under the same roof," Kathleen said.

"Well, sort of," Maureen replied as she sat down the box she was carrying.

"Dad, why does Maureen get the apartment over the garage? I wouldn't mind having a place of my own."

"Maureen is the oldest. And she is giving up living on campus to help us pull this family back together. She is going back to college soon and she is going to need her own quiet space for studying and doing homework."

"It isn't fair dad, Maureen gets everything! Just because she's the oldest!"

"Well, honey, that is just the way things work sometimes. But I'll tell you what, Elizabeth and the boys took the boys prefer the bedrooms upstairs, but you are older. Why don't you choose your room next? Liv and I have the master bedroom. But anything else is up for grabs."

"Really?" Kathleen asked.

"Really."

"You guys already have these set up."

"It is just stuff, Kathleen. Stuff can be moved into another room."

"What about the basement?"

"There are two bedrooms in the basement."

"Can I take one of those and have my own space? Or do I have to share the space with the other kids?"

"I'll make you a deal. If you keep up the grades and stick around the house more often, you can have the bedroom in the basement."

"And the other bedroom?"

"I think we could turn it into a guest room. The other kids can have their pick of the bedrooms upstairs. As long as you show me that you can be mature and responsible enough to handle your own space, I will give you the chance. But if you show me that you can't handle it, then I will move you back upstairs. And you can take the little bedroom next to Olivia and I so that I can keep an eye on you."

"Dad!" Kathleen protested.

Elliot laughed.

"I mean it though. Don't make me regret giving you this chance. We will have rules in this household and they will be followed. By you, by everyone."

"I get it dad. I'm not gonna do anything to land me back at aunt Kate's, trust me."

"Alright. Now go decide which room you want so that we can get your stuff moved and I can get your bed set up."

"Thanks daddy," she said kissing him on the cheek.

"You're welcome, honey."

Elliot watched as an excited Kathleen ran downstairs to look at the bedrooms.

"Did I miss something?" Olivia asked stepping into the kitchen.

"Not really," Elliot said handing her a bottle of water from the refrigerator. "I told her she could have one of the bedrooms in the basement. She was a tad bit jealous of big sister getting the garage apartment. I told her I would give her a chance, but if she screws this up, there will be some rearranging." Elliot watched Olivia's face for a reaction. "You don't think that was a good idea?"

Olivia thought about it for a moment.

"No, I think it is a good idea."

"You do?"

"Yeah, I think it is an excellent way to give her a little responsibility and to show her that we trust her to think like an adult."

"I'm glad you think so, because she is probably going to need a little help decorating downstairs and there is no way she is going to let me do it."

"You want me to help her decorate her room?"

"It could be a good bonding experience."

"True."

"So you'll do it?"

"Of course I will."

"Thank you."

"You're welcome. Now if you will excuse me, I should really get dinner started."

"You're cooking dinner? Wouldn't it be easier to just order some pizza from the place down the block?"

"It would, but I thought it would be nice to have a real family meal on our first night with all of us together in the house."

"Good thinking. What did you have in mind?"

"Well, Dickie and Elizabeth requested tacos. And Elizabeth wants to help me with dinner."

"She's helping you?"

"I figured it would be a good bonding experience," Olivia said with a wink as she walked across the room and called up the staircase for Elizabeth.

"Do you want to help?" Olivia asked Elliot.

"Sorry, I can't. I have to help Kathleen get set up downstairs and I still need to head out to the garage and check on Maureen."

"Elliot, she is almost eighteen years old. Give her a little space."

"She may be nearly eighteen, but she is still my child. I just want to check in with her and see if she needs any help."

"The apartment is hers. It is just like if she had a place off campus or in the dorm. That space is hers and I just think we need to make sure to respect that."

"I will, I promise. I just want her to understand that we are right here if she needs anything. I gave her a key to the house and told her she can come over and do laundry or raid the refrigerator, anything she needs she is welcome to."

"Just….make sure to knock."

"Okay," he agreed as he walked toward the back door.

"And make sure to tell her dinner is at seven," Olivia called before he could close the door.

Elliot caught her eye and smiled. He found it completely adorable that as hard as Olivia tried to be the voice of reason in the situation, she wanted to make sure Maureen was taken care of just as bad as he did.

After dinner Maureen and Elizabeth cleared the table and did the dishes. Elliot brought out some old board games and they all gathered around the table for some family fun. Olivia watched as one by one the kids said their goodnights and headed off to bed.

She headed off to her bathroom and drew a hot bath. She laid back beneath the fluffy cloud of bubbles and closed her eyes as she exhaled. So far, so good, she thought to herself. Just then there was a soft tap on the bathroom door.

"Olivia, is everything alright?" Elliot asked from the other side of the door.

"Yeah," she replied. "I'm just taking a bath."

"Can we talk for a minute?"

Olivia shifted a few strategically placed bubbles making sure she was covered.

"Come on in," she said softly.

The door opened slowly and Elliot stepped inside with his hand covering his eyes.

"I'm not looking, I swear."

Olivia laughed.

"It's okay. I'm covered."

Elliot opened his eyes. Olivia had her hair pulled up in a clip with a few strands framing her face. She was leaned back in the bath tub and the bubbles laid just below her amazingly sexy shoulders, covering everything from there down. Her right leg was bent and her knee peeking out from beneath the mountain of soap suds. The other leg was stretched out with her ankle resting against the side of the garden tub revealing tanned skin and painted toenails.

"What was it you wanted to talk about?"

"Oh, umm, I just wanted to see how you felt about tonight. This was the first night…."

"Of the rest of our lives," she said finishing his sentence. "I think it went really well. The kids seem to be happy here."

"And you?"

Olivia just stared at him for a moment.

"Are you happy? The last several months have been all about me and the kids, no one ever asked you what you wanted. What do you want?"

Olivia thought for a moment and smiled.

"I want our kids to be happy and healthy. And I want them to be with their father in a place they can call their home."

"You are always thinking about everyone else."

"I'm a parent now, that is part of my job."

Elliot smiled.

"So we're really okay?"

"I think we're doing pretty good. We have a great house and five beautiful children. A good marriage, to my best friend. Could it get any better?"

"I want you to be happy."

"El, I am happy."

"I don't want you to feel like we're holding you back."

"What? No. I don't feel that way at all. I am here because I want to be here."

"I'm happy to hear that. Just promise me, if you should decide you are unhappy, you will come talk to me."

Olivia smiled.

"You have my word. Now, can you hand me my robe?"

"Sure," Elliot said picking up the white terry cloth bathrobe from the counter and handing it to her. "I'll give you a little privacy," he said walking back into the bedroom allowing her time to dress.

Several minutes later Olivia walked back into the bedroom. She sat on the edge of the bed and applied jasmine scented lotion to her arms and legs. She wore a pink tee shirt and a pair of pink plaid pajama shorts.

"Listen to that," Elliot said as Olivia held at attention.

"I don't hear anything," she said.

"Exactly. Silence. That is rare in a house with five children.

"Do you think they are all settled in alright?"

"I'm sure they're fine. We should get some sleep while it is so peaceful. Eli wakes up early."

"Yeah," she agreed. "You know what, I'm gonna grab a bottle of water from the refrigerator. Do you want anything?"

"I'm good. Thanks," he said settling into the bed.

Olivia walked down the hall and pulled a bottle of water from the refrigerator. She stared out the kitchen window as the darkened apartment over the garage and smiled. Olivia made her way to the basement door and opened it slowly. From the top of the stairs she could see the flicker of the light from the television. She pulled the door closed and turned to head back to her bedroom.

Olivia made it as far as the stairwell before she stopped. She looked down the hall toward the bedroom, then turned her attention to the top of the stairs. She walked slowly up the stairs to check on the other three children.

In Dickie's bedroom a video game was flashing across the screen of the television. He was stretched out across his bed with his head where his feet should be. Olivia took the extra blanket from the chair across the room and covered him up. She reached down and took the game controller out of his hand placing it on the TV stand and turned off the television.

Next was Eli's room. The little boy had fallen asleep in his crib holding his favorite stuffed dog and sucking on his thumb.

"Good night buddy," she whispered running her fingers through his blonde curls as he slept. She watched him for a moment thinking to herself how much he looked like his mother, but he looked a lot like Elliot, too.

Down the hall Elizabeth was sleeping soundly. Olivia pulled the blanket up over her shoulders and tucked her in. She smiled as she turned and headed for the door.

"Good night Liv," she heard a small voice say from behind her.

"Goodnight honey," Olivia replied with a smile as she turned to look at the girl.

Olivia headed back into the hall on her way back to her own bedroom when she heard a voice behind her.

"Going for a bottle of water, huh?"

She turned around to see Elliot standing in the doorway of Eli's room.

"I wanted to make sure they were warm enough."

Elliot smiled.

"You wanted to check on them. You can admit it."

"Okay, so I got caught. What are you doing up here?"

"I heard you talking to Eli on the monitor and thought he was awake. I came up to help you out with him."

Olivia smiled.

"I just want them to feel safe again. To get comfortable and get used to having a real home again. I want them to be able to let their guard down and not have to live in fear of being jerked away from their father again. I want them to be happy."

"So do I," Elliot said. "Let's get some rest, now. I'll make breakfast in the morning."

"Pancakes?"

"By request. Dickie and Kathleen's favorite."

Olivia yawned.

"It has been a long day," Elliot said as they walked down the stairs.

"But a good one," she added.


	11. 11 Electricity

_Playing House_

_(Chapter Eleven: Electricity)_

Olivia stared up through the moon roof of her Jeep at the night sky. It was beautiful, from this angle, the way the rain seemed to spill over the tinted glass. She rolled her head to the side and drew a deep breath taking in the scent of him as she closed her eyes to concentrate solely on the way he felt inside of her. To say this was anything less than what she had been searching for her entire life, she would be lying to herself.

She knew this wasn't where they were supposed to be, yet somehow they kept finding themselves in this exact situation. Something would happen, leaving them alone together and one thing would lead to another. Neither of them knowing exactly how the events had unfolded and before long they would find themselves naked and tangled up in each other.

Olivia tipped her head back as she heard her own soft cries of passion as he playfully nipped and tenderly kissed up her jaw line, stopping at her ear. His mouth lingered there for a moment and she could feel his warm breath against her skin causing every hair on her body to stand on end. She brushed her nose against his and stared into the ocean blue of his eyes as her bottom lip quivered in anticipation as his mouth pressed against hers once more.

Normally during a sexual encounter this would be the point where she would close her eyes tight and begin to fake it as she silently hoped for something incredible and Earth rattling to happen. But it rarely ever did. In most cases even a mild orgasm was too far beyond her reach. Not this time.

Olivia gasped for air as a rush of heat came over her body. She whimpered softly in pleasure and curled her toes. She smoothed her fingertips up his strong muscular back and moved her body against his.

She smiled at the sound of his moans and soft, but manly grunts. Olivia giggled playfully as he locked his fingers between hers and kissed her passionately. She tasted the salt in his kiss and felt the sting of the cold as he pressed her hand against steamy window.

She felt his movements begin to slow and saw the fire of intensity in his eyes. The thunder crashed outside the car and lightening struck the ground a few feet away from her car lighting up the world of darkness around them.

He rolled over and before she knew it they were sitting up face to face. His eyes stared deep into her soul. He raised his thumb, placing it under her chin and guiding her mouth to his.

Olivia felt the passion in each kiss and moaned as his hands caressed every curve of her body. She laughed nervously as he pulled her tee shirt over her head and tossed it into the corner with her white lace bra.

"That's better. My God you are so beautiful," he whispered softly as he combed his fingers through her hair.

Olivia felt her body tremble as his mouth met her breast and his fingers trailed down her bare back. Moments later she felt her back arch and she was moaning her way through another very intense orgasm. He was incredible and seemed to navigate her body better than any man she had ever known.

When he touched her and looked at her and kissed her, she felt something she had never felt before. His touch was electric, shooting energy through her body. When they made love the passion between them was as strong as the thunder and lightning of the storm that surrounded them.

Here, now, it were as if they were in their own little world. Right or wrong, they were here. Together. With nothing between them but the night and the moist layer of sweat that covered their bodies. In this moment, this was exactly where they were supposed to be.


	12. 12 Red Wine & Romance

_Playing House_

_(Chapter Twelve: Red Wine & Romance)_

Elliot pulled the car over and parked it at the far end of an empty parking lot. It was dark now and the stars were all in place, shining like diamonds up above them.

"It was nice of Maureen to keep the kids and give us a little grown up time," Olivia said as she climbed out of the car and looked around them.

"It's always nice to get a little downtime," Elliot agreed.

"And they packed us a romantic picnic dinner," she said with a shy smile.

"Complete with a bottle of wine and a couple of paper cups."

Olivia laughed.

"If I didn't know any better I would say our kids were trying to hook us up. Of course they are all still under the impression that all of this is real and that we are really married."

Their eyes met and she stared at him for a moment before she turned away.

"Well, it is a beautiful evening with only a few clouds in the sky. We have to eat and I would hate to waste a good bottle of wine."

"It's peanut butter," Olivia said with a smile as she inspected one of the sandwiches. "This is so cute. There is a note."

Elliot laughed as Olivia held up a homemade envelope with a big heart drawn on it in red crayon.

"Daddy and Olivia," she read as a smiled spread slowly across her face, "thank you both so much for bringing our family back together. We love you both very much and hope you have a romantic evening together. Happy six month anniversary," Olivia read in a puzzled tone. "It has been six months already?"

"That went by fast."

"PS: Enjoy your romantic dinner under the moonlight. Hope you like peanut butter with strawberry jam. Love, Maureen, Kathleen, Dickie, Elizabeth and Eli. They are the sweetest kids ever."

"It is cute."

"So the kids got together and planned a romantic night picnic under the stars for our six month anniversary. And we completely forgot about it."

"Not completely," Elliot said pulling a small bouquet of white roses from the picnic basket. "Happy anniversary."

"Thank you," she said softly. "Now I feel bad. I'm the only one in the family who forgot our anniversary."

Elliot laughed and handed her a paper cup of cheep red wine.

"Technically, our anniversary isn't for another six months. This is just dinner from a basket under the stars."

Olivia smiled softly.

"I guess you're right," she said taking a sip.

"And if this was our real wedding anniversary, those roses would probably be divorce papers."

Elliot saw tears behind her eyes as her beautiful smile slowly faded.

"True," she said softly looking away from him.

"That is still the plan, right. One year in and we're out?"

"Yeah. That's probably what's best. If we end it too early the judge could catch on and if we carry on too long like this it is liable to cause the kids more harm than good. One year in and we're out."

"To 'D' day," he said raising his paper cup in a toast, "to your freedom."

Elliot tapped his cup against hers, then took a sip. Olivia tipped her cup and stared into it for a minute.

"If it's alright with you, I'd rather not talk about 'D' day tonight."

"I'm sorry."

"No, it's alright. It is just a little depressing, talking about divorce all of the time. Maybe we should just spend the next six months trying to make this arrangement more like a normal marriage. You know, enjoy the time we all have together, before it's all over."

"That makes sense."

She exhaled as she took a drink from her paper cup. "We should probably head back, it smells like rain."

"Smells like rain? It is beautiful out here. A little chilly, but look at that sky."

"Look at those clouds," she said pointing to the west as a blanket of dark clouds seemed to appear out of nowhere.

"It isn't going to rain. And you have not even tasted your dinner yet."

"I wouldn't want to disappoint the kids," Olivia said tearing the corner off her sandwich.

"I especially like how they cut it diagonally. Like you do when you make their sandwiches."

"It tastes better that way. And how do you know they got it from me? I'm sure Kathy cut their sandwiches for them."

Elliot was quiet for a moment and Olivia felt bad for bringing her up.

"Yeah, she cut them in half, but not diagonally."

"I shouldn't have brought her up."

"It's alright. It's nice, you know? Sometimes, to talk about her. The kids, they don't want to. It is still pretty hard on them. I guess it always will be."

"Do you still miss her?"

"I do. A part of me always will."

"Do you think you will ever love again?"

Elliot smiled as he stared into her eyes.

"I'd like to think so. To think that someday, I will find a woman that is good for me and my kids. Then and only then will I be able to consider spending the rest of my life with someone. And lets face it, most women aren't interested in a widower with five children."

"Five amazing children," she corrected him. "And most women don't know that they are missing. But do you think you will ever really love someone? I mean the way that you loved Kathy?"

"I don't know, Liv. Kathy and I were just kids when met. She was my first love."

"Your only love."

"Yeah, well, somewhere out there is a woman who will change that."

"Somewhere," she agreed. "You need a refill?" she asked topping off his paper cup.

"What about you? Do you think you will ever get married? I mean, really married."

"I don't know. _If _and that is a big _if,_ I find the right guy….I wouldn't mind getting married someday and maybe having a couple kids."

"I think you would make a great wife and mother."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. I mean, you are getting a lot of practice, now."

Olivia laughed.

"I never really thought of this as practice."

They talked about life and work and the kids and before they knew it more than two hours had passed and the wine bottle was empty. This was the first time Elliot had ever really felt a buzz from wine. This was the first time he had actually help to finish an entire bottle.

They laid back on the blanket to stare up at the night sky, but the stars had disappeared now. It was all one thick black blanket of clouds and thunder rumbled in the distance.

"I told you it was going to rain," Olivia laughed.

"It isn't going to rain," Elliot argued.

"If it isn't going to rain, then why is there thunder," she said as lightning spread out across the sky, miles away. "Lightning. It's gonna storm."

"That is miles away, Liv. If it hits us, it wont be for hours."

"You will argue about anything, won't you?"

"No, I won't."

Olivia smiled and giggled a bit as she turned her head to look over at him.

"Listen to us. After six months of faking it we sound like an old married couple."

"Yeah. Only we're younger….and hotter."

"Hotter?" she asked feeling just a bit woozy as she stared at him.

"Well, at least one of us is," Elliot said with a wink.

"Are you flirting with me, detective?" she laughed.

Elliot stared into her big brown eyes for a moment completely zoning out from the conversation. The truth was he wasn't really sure he had ever met a more beautiful woman in his entire life. But he could never tell her this.

How do you tell your best friend that you have been just a little bit in love with her for years? Even more, how do you tell her that you didn't even notice it until a month or so earlier when you ended up in bed together?

How do you tell her that since that night when you held her so tight in your arms, she is all you can think about? How do you tell your best friend that no woman you meet will ever have a shot in hell, because you always end up comparing them to her?

"El," Olivia said pulling him back to reality just as he realized he was about to kiss her.

Elliot blinked for a moment as she stared at him. As he sat there, looking like a fool and trying to think of something to say to save him from himself, the most amazing thing happened…. A loud crash of thunder boomed and lightning lit up she sky above them as a heavy rain began to pour.

Olivia screamed and jumped to her feet as she rushed to gather up the remains of their late night picnic. The icy rain fell so quickly it drenched them both in seconds. Elliot grabbed the blanket and she picked up the basket as they ran for Olivia's Jeep.

Elliot pushed the button on the remote to disarm the alarm and opened the passenger's side door for Olivia as she tossed the basket inside.

"Shit," she said looking down between her feet as she realized she had dropped her cell phone into a puddle.

As Elliot reached down to get it for her he noticed another problem.

"Shit is right," he said pointing out that the back tire on the vehicle was completely flat.

"Great," Olivia groaned as she slid into the seat and slammed the door shut.

Elliot ran around the car and climbed into the driver's seat tossing the blanket into the back. He put the key into the ignition and started up the car.

"El, what are you doing? The tire is flat."

"The tire is flat, but the engine still works. Aren't you cold?" he asked watching her tremble as her hair dripped rain water onto her shirt.

"I'm kind of freezing."

"Alright, then. It should start to warm up in a few minutes."

"My stupid phone is shot! It wont even power up!"

"Let me see that," he said taking it from her hand.

Olivia watched as Elliot took the back off the phone and laid it up on the dash.

"What does that do?"

"If we caught it in time it might help it dry out."

"We can use your's to call triple A."

"We could," he said looking down at his phone, "if it wasn't dead."

"What?"

"Eli likes to play with it. I thought it was better charged up than that. It wont come on either."

"So we're stuck here?"

"Looks that way. Unless you wanna walk in the rain to the nearest phone?"

Olivia looked out the window of the car as the thunder boomed and more lighting lit up the park.

"That isn't likely," she said pressing her forehead against the window. "I told you it was gonna rain."

"Hey, this isn't that bad," he said trying to cheer her up. "Help me look," he said opening the center consol and digging through papers and change.

"Look for what?"

"I should have a charger in here, somewhere."

Olivia opened the glove box and sifted through insurance documents and drive thru napkins.

"Tampons? You keep tampons in here?"

"You never know when you might need one."

"Oh," he said dropping it back where he found it and closing the consol. "Not in here. Maybe one of the kids took it out."

"Wait….here," she said pulling it from the glove box.

Elliot hooked the phone to the charger and laid it down to charge.

"It shouldn't take long to charge enough I can make at least one call."

They sat quietly and listened to the wild storm outside the car for a few minutes.

"I hope the kids aren't scared," she said watching the strong winds rip through the trees.

"It's almost midnight," he said looking down at his watch. "Eli and the twins are fast asleep by now and the older girls will be alright. They know what to do if the storm gets too bad. They are probably trying to reach us though."

Olivia exhaled and tipped her head back as the engine of her car made a choking sound and died.

"Now what?" she asked looking over at him.

"Liv, when was the last time you put gas in this thing?"

She rolled her eyes and fell back in her seat.

"I cannot believe this," she laughed in annoyance.

The car was quiet for few more minutes.

"It's starting to get cold again," Elliot noted.

"No gas, no heat."

"There's a blanket in the back."

"The blanket is wet too, Elliot."

"It isn't as wet as you are."

Olivia stared at him slightly annoyed, but couldn't help but laugh. Elliot watched as a smile slowly spread across her face and before long they were both laughing.

"I look like a wet dog!" she said looking in the mirror on the visor. "A sheep dog."

"No, a sheep dog has straighter, frizzy hair. Your's is more like…."

"A poodle?" she asked with a smile.

"Not quite," he laughed.

Elliot watched as her bottom lip quivered again.

"Olivia, get in the back and cover up with the blanket. You are so stubborn."

"I am not stub…." she stopped herself and smiled again.

"I rolled it up. Only part of it got wet."

"Alright, I am freezing," she said climbing between the seats and into the back. "We left the seats folded down," she said reaching between them to try and put them back into place. "It's stuck."

"Do you need some help?" Elliot asked climbing into the back with her.

"The thingie that you push to release them so you can fold them up…."

"The thingie? Is that what it is called? All this time I have called it a lever."

"Very funny," she said attempting to force it and smashing her finger. "Shit," she said shaking her hand and inspecting her fingertip.

"Are you okay?"

"I just smashed my finger. I'll be alright, it just hurt like hell."

"Is it bleeding? I found a small first aid kit when I was looking for the charger."

Elliot took her hand in his to inspect her finger.

"It's okay. It just hurts. This entire night it turning out to be a disaster."

Elliot raised her fingertip to his lips and gently kissed it.

"There," he said softly. "My kids swear that makes it better."

"Really?" she asked staring into his eyes.

Elliot's heart was pounding and he couldn't help but wonder if she was feeling the same way he did.

"Really," he answered.

Elliot gulped for breath and fought off the urge as hard as he could. Thinking about it now he wasn't quite sure who even made the first move, but seconds later they were kissing and it was incredible.

Without thinking he slipped his fingertips under the bottom of her tee shirt and moved them around to the small of her back. Elliot pulled her closer to him and turned them to lay down in the back of the Jeep. Next came a slow, but steamy make out session that progressed until he found himself fumbling to remove her bra.

Olivia smiled at his failed attempt and she reached behind her unhooking it and slipping it off. His heart was pounding and the only thing he wanted to see was the love in her eyes. They kissed and touched and quickly steamed up the windows. It was dark and the rain beat heavily against the outside of the Jeep.

Elliot gave in to every temptation he had every had when it came to Olivia. He traced his fingertips over the soft curves of her perfect body as he kissed the underside of her neck. Olivia must have really been enjoying his touch, because she closed her eyes and moaned softly.

He moved his hands under her wet tee shirt to touch her breasts. He needed them and gently massaged them as he stared into her eyes. Olivia untucked his shirt from his pants and unbuckled his belt. She paused for a moment and bit her bottom lip nervously as she unzipped them.

Elliot smiled, staring deep into her pretty brown eyes as if asking her permission as his fingers danced across the waist of her jeans. Olivia took a deep breath and exhaled. She blinked twice then kissed him tenderly. Elliot unbuttoned her jeans and Olivia raised up as he slid them from her body and tossed them across the car.

Elliot kissed her and combed his fingers through her damp tousled hair. She was so warm and smelled and tasted so good. His body ached for her and he couldn't remember the last time he needed anyone the way he needed her now. This was more than just a want for sex or an animal attraction. Between the two of them it was more of an understanding, an unspoken truth to all of the wonder that had surrounded them both for years.

As wrong as it seemed sometimes, it felt as if this were exactly where they were meant to be. Making to love to Olivia was like breathing, easy and carefree. It were as if their bodies were doing what they had been born to do. No planning out the details or trying too hard to please her.

Every move with her was extraordinary and the pleasure they brought each other was so intense. Elliot had never enjoyed making love to anyone as much as he did Olivia.

Even with Kathy, things weren't like this. When they were young, the sex was hot and they couldn't get enough of each other. Then the babies came and life got in the way. After a while making love with his wife had been reduced to mere sex and sex was more like a chore than anything. They were even on a schedule, once a week on Saturday nights after the kids were asleep. Nothing new or exciting. And in the last few months they were together, Kathy didn't even seem to enjoy it anymore. More like tolerated it and waited for it to be over. She barely looked at him when they were in bed together. So unlike the way Olivia stared lovingly into his eyes each time they made love.

Elliot moaned as he moved inside of her. Olivia moved her fingers gently up his back sending chills up his spine. Her kisses were so sweet and every tough and look she gave him seemed to beg for more.

He locked his fingers between hers as she moaned softly against his ear. Elliot smiled when he felt their gold wedding bands brush against each other. He raised their hands to touch the icy cold of the glass window of the SUV. Feeling the sting of the cold against his skin seemed to prove to him that this was infact real and not some incredible fantasy in the back of his mind.

She was real. He was real. And they were really here in the back of this car making love together. Elliot was making love to his wife.

He sat up to look down at her under him. Olivia blinked her eyes and pressed her lips together. Without the bra Elliot could see her hardened nipples under the damp tee shirt. He smiled mischievously and raised her to meet him.

Olivia laughed as her nose brushed against his. Elliot smiled at her, she was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen and she was his….for now anyway. He traced his thumb over her jaw line and guided her mouth to his. Their kisses were so passionate, Elliot was sure no woman in his life had ever kissed him like this before.

Elliot smoothed his hands up her waist and under the tee shirt pulling it over her head and tossing it into the pile of clothing.

"That's better," he whispered.

At first she was a little shy, lowering her arms to cover her chest as she looked into his eyes. Elliot combed his fingers through the soft waves of her dark hair and kissed her again. Olivia lowered her arms allowing him to fully see her nude body for the first time that night.

"My God you are so beautiful," he whispered softly as he combed his fingers through her hair.

Elliot kissed his way down her body, feeling her tremble at his touch. She closed her eyes and tipped her head back as he entered her once more. They made love for what seemed like hours more. And when they had finished, they collapsed in each other's arms.

Elliot held her as they stared up and out the moon roof of the black SUV at the rain that surrounded them. He locked his fingers between hers and watched the shimmer of their gild rings against each other in the dark. They didn't speak for a while, neither of them was really sure what to say. Both knowing in that in some way this was wrong. Both knowing it felt so right.

Elliot gently kissed the top of her head.

"The kids are probably worried sick," she said softly and he listened for the regret in her voice.

He exhaled and tucked the damp blanket in around her body as he reached to the front of the car for his cell phone. Olivia watched as he turned his phone on and dialed the house number.

"Hey, honey. No, we're fine. Well, we got rained on and my phone was dead. We have a flat tire and we're stuck here in the car. I'm gonna call the auto club to bring us another tire and we should be home before too long. I love you too, baby."

Elliot hung up the phone and turned to look at Olivia. She had already sat up and began to put her clothes back on.

"I told Maureen not to worry."

"I heard," she said softly as she looked up at him.

"This was nice," Elliot said in an attempt to get her to talk about it.

"Yeah."

"I know you're against this…."

"You're not?" she asked.

"Olivia, we can't ignore the fact that we are incredible together. Or that this keeps happening between us."

"We have both been so lonely," she said combing her fingers through her hair.

"That's just it, Liv. I haven't felt lonely at all since you came along. Everything has been so great. I'm happy, the kids are happy. Are you happy?"

Olivia stared into his eyes and forced a scared smile.

"I'm happy."

"Don't be scared. We have always been here for each other. We have just kind of taken that to a new level."

"What are we gonna do now?" she asked. "Obviously saying it isn't going to happen again doesn't work."

"What if we didn't fight it anymore?"

"What are you saying?"

"Look, I care about you and I know you care about me. When we are together…." Elliot exhaled, "I think we are both getting something we need from this. Ideally, yes, I can see where it is wrong. Doesn't make that feeling go away."

"So what do we do?"

"What if we didn't fight it? What if we just kind of went along with it?"

"Keep sleeping together?"

"It beats being alone. I'm not saying we have to date or anything if you don't want to. I am just saying we get rid of all of the guilt and turn to each other when we need someone. It is part of human nature, that need to feel loved. And we can stay right here in denial and say we wont let it happen again, both of us knowing very well that is probably will. All I am saying is that I don't think we should have to feel guilty about it. It isn't like we are cheating or anything."

"You mean you think we should just have sex, when we want sex?"

"Well….yes."

"Like casual sex?"

"I didn't think of it that way, but I guess so. Yes."

"Between you and I?"

"Uhh huh."

"And what if someone finds out?"

"Liv, they all think we are actually married. Everyone is assuming we are having regular sex anyway."

"I guess I didn't think about it that way."

"This wouldn't be any different than if we went out and had a one night stand to fill some need that you had. Only it is safer and we know and trust each other. We care about each other and I would never hurt you."

"I'm not on anything, Elliot."

"So we'll buy some condoms. We'll keep them around incase we do decide to do something."

"Liv, it is obvious we are attracted to each other or this wouldn't keep happening. There isn't anything wrong with that. I just think that we need to be a little more practical about it. Honestly, well, legally you and I are married. So if I did decided to go out and hook up with someone, not only would everyone else think I am shit for cheating on you, but I couldn't help but feel like I was cheating as well. I'm not like that. But you and I are married, so legally…."

Olivia smiled at his attempt to justify the sexual relationship between them.

"Legally?"

"It's just sex," Elliot said. "And maybe it was a stupid idea. I'm sorry for bringing it up."

"Don't be."

He raised his head to look at her.

"You're kind of right," she said.

"I am?"

"Yes. It is probably going to happen again. And we can keep feeling this awkwardness every time and lying to ourselves saying it wont happen again….or we can be smart about it and take responsibility here. Be prepared if it should happen again. If I dated someone else or went home with another man, I would feel like I am cheating on you. I don't want that."

"Casual sex," Elliot said as he zipped up his pants. "I didn't know casual sex could be so hot."

Olivia laughed.

"Maybe that is because you never had casual sex with your wife?"

"I should call them about the tire. There is no telling how long it might take them to get out here to fix it."

"True."

"Then we can head home and crawl in bed. It has been a long and exhausting day."

Olivia smiled.

"What?" Elliot asked.

"Nothing," she said turning away.

"No, what is it?"

She turned back to him and bit her lip.

"I was just thinking maybe we could stop by the pharmacy on the way home."

Elliot stared at her for a minute and a smile spread across his face when he realized what she was trying to say.

"Really?"

"Well," she said clearing her throat, "we want to be prepared, right?"

"Definitely."

They both laughed as Elliot picked up the phone to call triple A.


	13. 13 Elliot's Revelation

_Playing House_

_(Chapter Thirteen: Elliot's Revelation) _

Elliot sat at his desk pretending to be working as he stared at her across the room. In the weeks since they had began this casual sex arrangement she was all he could think about. The truth was it had been this way from the moment they began sleeping in the same bed. Elliot would often lay awake at night and just watch her sleep. So beautiful and peaceful.

He watched as she sat on the edge of Fin's desk and looked through a file. Every strand of her dark wavy hair fell perfectly into place and she looked incredible in her black slacks and soft ivory colored sweater. She was classy and elegant and she was his. For now anyway.

"Stabler?" Munch asked from behind him.

"Yeah?"

"You have been sitting in front of that empty computer screen for over an hour. Don't you think it is about time you got some work done?"

"I've been working," Elliot argued without breaking his stare.

Munch knelt to get on his eye level and realizing what he was staring at. "Ahh, she is beautiful. But if you don't find a way to get past these distractions," he said nodding in her direction, "you are gonna get into trouble."

"She's my wife, I'm supposed to be distracted by her."

Munch exhaled and looked up as a man walked through the door with a large vase of white roses.

"Olivia Stabler?" the man said turning his attention directly to her.

"Yes."

"These are for you," he said handing her the vase.

"What are you doing man?" Munch asked Elliot.

"Falling in love with my wife," he said watching as she read the card and looked up at him with a smile and their eyes met.

"Thank you," she mouthed and Elliot winked at her.

"Aren't you supposed to do that before you marry a woman?"

"You don't understand it John. If you did, you wouldn't have been divorced so many times. I love her. I really love her."

"Yeah, well we all think that in the beginning. I really loved all of my wives. Still do. And I am reminded of that love with each alimony check I write."

"Don't worry buddy," Elliot said patting him on the shoulder, "there is a woman out there who will change your mind about love. You just have to get out there and find her. Now, if you'll excuse me, I think I am gonna buy my beautiful wife some lunch."

Half an hour later they were sharing a booth in one of Olivia's favorite restaurants. Elliot watched the way she pressed her lips together as she studied the menu, he was completely consumed by her.

"I'll have the grilled chicken alfredo with broccoli and a glass of merlot please," Olivia said handing the menu to the waiter.

"I'll have the same," Elliot said as she looked at him. "With a beer."

Olivia shook her head as the waiter walked away from the table.

"What is up with you today?" she asked.

"What are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about the roses and lunch and the way you have been staring at me all day."

"I haven't been staring."

"Elliot, every time I look at you, you are looking at me."

"You wouldn't know that if you weren't staring," he said and she smiled.

"Seriously, what is going on with you?"

"Nothing is going on. I'm just happy. For the first time in a long time and I have you to thank for it. I appreciate everything that you have done and continue to do, for me and for the kids and I want you to know that."

Olivia stared at him for a moment and smiled.

"Well, thank you. But I know it. I see it every day, with you and the kids. When they smile and laugh and I see how happy they are being there with their father. I know I did the right thing. And I would do it again in a heartbeat. Are you sure this excessive happiness doesn't have anything to do with the fact that you are getting laid on a regular basis?"

Elliot laughed.

"_That_ is incredible."

Olivia laughed as she picked up her wine glass.

"Yes, it is."

"I think it is more than that. It is seeing the kids smiling again and seeing how well we all function together as a family."

"Elliot, are you happy?"

"I am. I truly am. And for the first time in months, my children are happy, too. What about you, Olivia?"

"What about me?"

"Are you happy?"

She thought quietly for a moment and Elliot watched as a smile slowly spread across her face.

"You know, I am. For the first time in a long time I can say without a doubt, I am happy with my life right now."

"Good. I wouldn't want to think you were completely miserable here."

"I am here with the people I care about the most in the world, why would I be miserable?"

"I just don't want you to feel like you have to stay or you are trapped here."

"I don't. I am here because this is where I want to be, here with my family, you and the kids."

Elliot smiled unsure of what to say to that.

Later that night as they got ready for bed, Elliot sat admiring her once more.

"You are so beautiful when you let your hair down," Elliot said watching as Olivia took the clip out of her hair and shook it loose. "You are always pretty, but this is when I think you're the most beautiful."

"When I'm sitting on the edge of the bed wearing only a tank top and lacy black underwear?"

Elliot smiled, a little embarrassed.

"They are nice underwear," he replied as she laughed.

"El, it is sweet of you to say that, but I don't even have any makeup on."

"That is exactly what I am trying to say, Liv. You have a natural beauty that most women would be insanely jealous of. You don't need makeup to be pretty," he said tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

Olivia smiled, leaning in to place a soft kiss on his cheek.

"Thank you," she whispered.

Elliot leaned forward and kissed her tenderly as he combed his fingers through her hair. Olivia moaned softly and giggled as she laid down against the bed. He kissed her and slowly moved his hands over the curves of her body as things began to heat up.

"Let me get…." Elliot mumbled pulling away from her and moving to the drawer where the condoms were kept.

"Don't be too long," Olivia taunted with a smile as she pulled back the blankets and climbed into bed.

"Liv, what happened to that box of condoms we just bought?"

"I put them in the drawer."

"There aren't any in here."

"Maybe we used them," she suggested as she propped her cheek against her hand and waited for him to come back to bed.

"All of them?"

"Well, we have kind of been like a couple of rabbits lately," she said with a suggestive smile.

Elliot looked over at her and smiled.

"I know, but it was a box of twelve and it hasn't even been a week since I got them."

"I don't know, El, I wasn't exactly counting how many condoms we used."

"Do you have any in your purse?"

"No, why would I? This is the only place we have sex."

"Right. Shit," he groaned standing up as he began to button his pants. "I guess I'll go get some."

"Elliot, wait. You don't have to do that."

"You want me to just pull out?"

"That's not what I meant. I saw my doctor a few weeks ago and…. I'm on the pill."

"And you didn't tell me?"

"I didn't think it was a big deal."

"I guess not, but if that was a couple of weeks ago, why have we still been using condoms?"

"She said it takes a little while for the hormones to build up in my system and suggested we still use condoms for a few weeks. I guess I just didn't see the point in making a big deal of it if we still had to use a condom."

"Do you think it has been long enough since you started taking it?"

"It's been about three weeks. I would think that is long enough."

"Alright. If you're sure."

Elliot unbuttoned his pants and let them drop to the floor. He pulled his shirt over his head and tossed it aside, then crawled into bed with his wife.

That night as she laid sleeping in his arms, Elliot stared down at Olivia. She was without a doubt the most attractive woman he had ever seen. He shifted and pulled the blankets up tucking them around her nude body as she nestled her cheek against his chest.

"I love you darlin'," he breathed as he kissed the top of her head, realizing now that his heart was completely gone.


	14. 14 Family First

_Playing House_

_(Chapter Fourteen: Family First)_

"What do you think?" Olivia asked pulling Casey by the hand into the dressing room with her.

"I think I wish I had your body. Especially, the boobs."

"My body?" Olivia asked staring at her own hips in the mirror. "Maybe this is a bad idea."

"You are buying lingerie for your incredibly sexy husband as a birthday surprise. How could that possibly be a bad idea?"

"How do I even know he will like this?"

"He is a man. He has a penis and you are a woman with an incredible body. Of course he will like it."

"So do you like the black or the red better?" Olivia asked turning to admire her assets in the full length mirror.

"I still like the sexy flight attendant," Casey said with a suggestive smile.

"I'm not looking for a costume," Olivia said handing back the skimpy outfit.

"You and Elliot aren't into role play?"

"I am looking for something a little more simple. The sheer baby doll, off the shoulder with a black thong, maybe?"

"It's cute. Maybe we should keep looking."

"Not the one, huh?"

"Well, if I was a man and I was looking for the one item in this entire lingerie store what would give me the biggest stiffy…"

"Casey!"

"Well," she laughed. "That would not be the one. It is cute. But you need something hot to accent that rocking body."

Olivia laughed.

"When did you become such an expert on lingerie?" pulling on the silk robe from the changing room as they walked back out to look at the racks of clothing.

"You just have to think like a man."

"I am."

"No, you are thinking with your head, all sexy and romantic."

Olivia looked confused.

"You gotta think like you have a penis. And the only one thing that penis wants it to get you out of that little black thong."

"I get it, Casey. I just would like to try and keep it a bit romantic as well. I don't want to look like a cheap whore. I want something sexy and mysterious, but romantic and elegant."

"Like this?" Casey joked holding up a crotch less bodysuit.

"That is just gross," Olivia laughed.

"Tacky," Casey almost sang as she hung it back on the rack.

"I want the baby doll," Olivia said, "but I am not sure it is the one I am looking for, for this occasion."

"This is hot," Casey said picking up a long red satin gown with a slit in the side.

"It's pretty and classy. Ooh, I like this," Olivia said looking at a mannequin wearing a black bra and gartered skirt. "I love the skirt."

"Liv, that isn't a skirt. It's a ruffle."

"You don't like it?"

"It is adorable. I like the hot pink pinstripes and the little bows."

"I'm gonna go try it on," Olivia riffled through the rack and found it in her size. "Give me a minute."

"Sure thing," Casey said turning to look at a few things for herself.

"Well?" Olivia asked sliding open the curtain and leaning against the door of the dressing room. "What do you think?"

"Liv, that is so hot."

"Do you think he'll like it?"

"I don't know a man who wouldn't. Even the gay ones would consider it."

"It isn't too short? I feel like my ass is hanging out. Maybe I have too much butt to pull this off."

"Olivia, you have a great ass."

"Do you think this will put him in the mood?"

"I'd do you," Casey joked.

Olivia laughed.

"Thanks, Casey. If I ever decide to play for the other team, you will be the first person I call," Olivia said with a devious smile and a wink.

Casey laughed.

"So, that is the one?"

"Yes. This is the one. I think Elliot is going to love it. And I have these black stilettos that will go perfect with it."

"Cool. Now that you have found what we came here for, can we go grab some lunch? I am starving and could really use a drink."

"Alright," Olivia said stepping out of the little room fully dressed once more.

They paid for their purchases and made their way across town to have a glass of wine and a little lunch.

"What did Elliot say about you taking today off?"

"Nothing."

"He doesn't mind being stuck in court all day while you and I are out shopping?"

"No. I just took a personal day. Elliot doesn't mind. He knows I am with you."

"He probably thinks we're out buying shoes."

"Probably, although shoes are the one thing I didn't buy today."

"How ironic. Does he know you are shopping for his birthday?"

"No. I just told him I was in desperate need of a little retail therapy and a girl's day out."

"And that worked?"

"Elliot and I respect each other's space. We spend time together, but we also spend time apart. I trust him and he trusts me. That is how relationships are supposed to work, Casey."

"Like I would know. Every one that I have been in has lasted less than a year."

"Hang in there, you'll find someone."

"I have pretty much stopped looking. Except for the occasional office fling with some of the hot new attorneys around the courthouse, my love life has pretty much flat lined."

"I'm sorry," Olivia said taking a sip of her glass of Merlot.

"Well, there is something you can do to help."

"Really?"

"Yeah, tell me all about the sex with Romeo."

"What?"

"Details. Sex. You and Elliot. Your perfect naked body, pressed against his in the dark. Creating friction and a lot of sweat. God, I bet his body is amazing all covered in sweat. Spill it."

"Ha, no way!"

"Why not?"

"I don't kiss and tell. Besides this isn't some fling. This is my relationship with my husband you are talking about."

"Liv, please? I am not getting any. Just a few juicy details, I can imagine the rest."

"Absolutely, not."

"Olivia! I would do anything for you. And you cannot even do this one teensy weensy favor for me?"

"Nope."

Casey made a growling noise.

"You frustrate the hell out of me, you know that?"

"It wouldn't be right to Elliot."

"Please, you don't think he has talked to his friends about sex with his steaming hot wife? Men share these things with their friends."

"Do you really think he has told people?"

"Of course. Liv, just give me a few details."

"What do you want to know?"

"Well, the obvious…. Is it good?" Casey paused for a moment, watching as Olivia blushed and took a sip of wine. "I knew it. How good?"

"Amazing."

"Do you do it a lot?"

"Casey…."

"Dude, I would. Like how many times a week?"

"I don't really keep track."

"Well, is it once a week or a few times a week?"

"A few."

"You lay in bed at night next to a man like that and you are only getting sex a few times a week?"

"A few….dozen," Olivia corrected with a sly smile.

"Damn, girl. I knew there was a freak in there somewhere. Is he big?"

Olivia laughed.

"He is huge, isn't he?"

She just shook her head, refusing to answer the question.

"How is he in bed? Does he get all kinky or just stare down at you with those sexy blue eyes?"

"That is where I draw the line."

"Liv…."

"No, I have told you way too much already."

"Just tell me, like what positions does he like?"

Olivia shook her head.

"For the most part, with us it is more slow and romantic. And it is sweet and incredible and…."

"And?"

"Unlike it has ever been with any other man."

"Aww," Casey cooed. "I am so jealous, you dirty little slut," she joked.

Olivia laughed as her cell phone rang.

"It's El," she said raising the phone to her ear.

"Speak of the devil," Casey said flagging her waitress for another drink.

"No. No, Elliot, really. It isn't a problem. Alright, I'll see you when you get home." Olivia looked up as she was about to end the call and noticed Casey paying extra attention to the call. "I love you too, honey," Olivia said smiling at Casey as she hung up the phone.

"What's going on?" Casey asked.

"Eli threw up at daycare. They called Elliot, but he can't miss court. He needs me to go get him."

"What about lunch?" Casey asked.

"Rain check?" Olivia asked dropping a twenty dollar bill on the table to cover her glass of wine.

"I guess so," Casey said watching her friend wave goodbye to her. "So much for a girl's day out," she mumbled as she flagged the waitress for the bill.

In the hallway just outside the courtroom, Elliot stared down at his cell phone confused as hell.

"I love you too honey?" he repeated.

"Stabler," Munch called from behind him.

"Yeah?"

"The recess is over and they are almost ready for us. Did you get a hold of Olivia?"

"Yeah," Elliot said turning his phone back onto vibrate and dropping it into his pocket, "she cut her shopping day with Casey short a few hours to go pick up Eli and sit with him until I can get home."

"Well, you'd better get in here."

Elliot followed his friend back into the courtroom.

It was almost nine o'clock that evening when Elliot finally arrived home. In the kitchen Kathleen and Elizabeth had made dinner and saved him a plate. Kathleen was playing a game with Elizabeth to occupy her, while Maureen helped Dickie with his math homework.

"Hey guys, where's Liv?"

"She's laying down with Eli," Maureen answered. "He is running a fever and is pretty sick."

"Yeah dad, he barfed on her twice," Dickie added. "It was so cool."

"You didn't help her with him?"

"I tried to take him dad, but he wanted Olivia," Maureen explained. "He cried unless she held him. She took him back to you guy's room to see if she could get him to sleep about an hour ago."

"Alright, you think you can handle things here? I'm gonna go relieve her so she can get cleaned up."

"Yeah, dad."

"Everyone else has their homework done?" Elliot asked looking at the Kathleen and Elizabeth in the living room.

"Yes," Elizabeth answered and Kathleen agreed.

"Bed time, thirty minutes. Don't forget to brush your teeth."

"Can we watch TV?" Dickie asked.

"Until ten, then it is lights out."

Elliot made his rounds kissing the kids goodnight.

"I mean it, Dickie. You guys have school in the morning. I'm gonna make sure your brother is alright and hit the shower. Can I count on you guys to be responsible for yourselves?"

"Yes, daddy," Maureen answered.

"Good night baby," he said kissing her forehead.

"Night dad. Oh, there is a plate for you in the refrigerator."

"Thank you, sweetheart. I'll eat it after my shower."

Elliot made his way down the hall to their bedroom where the glow of the television was the only light on in the room. He walked around to Olivia's side of the bed to find her asleep with little Eli curled up in her arms.

Elliot smiled and took a seat on the edge of the bed. He reached out and placed his hand against his son's forehead, feeling for signs of a fever.

"It was about 99.6 at eight o'clock," Olivia said softly opening her eyes to look at him, "down from 102. I called the pediatrician and she said that if it goes up any more or it isn't gone in a day or so to bring him in. She said there is some virus going around and he probably got it from daycare. It should pass in a few days."

"How are you?"

"I'm alright."

"Dickie said he threw up on you?"

"Twice," she said softly.

"Yeah, he said that too."

"He couldn't help it," she said softly kissing the sleeping child.

"I should have been here. I'm sorry."

"It's okay, El. He's okay, I'm okay. Just a little baby vomit. Kind of gross and stinky, but not the end of the world."

"I was in court and doing paperwork while you were stuck here with my sick kid."

"_Our_ sick kid. And it is fine. I don't mind."

"You gave up your afternoon off to come home and watch over him."

"It was shopping and lunch with Casey, nothing too important. Family first," she said looking down at Eli as he sucked his thumb. "Besides, I was pretty much finished shopping anyway."

"Find any good shoe sales?"

Olivia smiled.

"A few. But I would rather be here with him anyway. He needed me."

"Maureen said he kind of latched on to you. He didn't give you much choice. He probably misses his mother."

"I'm sure he does."

"I'm sorry. This isn't exactly part of your job. Being saddled with my sick child all evening."

"Elliot, it wasn't a burden at all. He just hasn't felt good and wanted to be held. He is still a baby, this will happen from time to time. I walked around with him for a while and put in one of his Disney movies. He curled up here with me and fell asleep. It wasn't a problem at all."

"He adores you."

" He is my little buddy. And I think he was just looking for a little comfort. And it gave me a good excuse to watch cartoons all night," she said pointing to the television.

"You want me to relieve you, so you can hit the shower?"

"We're alright. I gave him a bath earlier to help bring down his temperature, then Kathleen sat with him in here while I took a quick shower. I think we're good for the night," she said with a yawn. "The kids made dinner. Pork steak. It is really good."

"I'm gonna grab a quick shower and make sure they are all in bed. Then I'll grab some dinner and come on to bed. I'm beat."

"How did work go?"

"The case didn't settle. We have to be back in court in the morning. Daycare wont take him back if he is sick."

"I can take off another day and stay home with him. I have plenty of time built up."

"Are you sure? I could just see if Maureen can sit with him until I get out of court."

"Then she would have to miss class. Elliot, it will be fine. I don't mind sitting with him."

"That would be great. Besides, he will probably want his Livia."

Olivia smiled.

"He loves you," Elliot said combing his fingertips through his son's blonde curls.

"I love him too," she said with a soft smile.

For the next three days, Olivia stayed at home with Eli. He clung to her hugging her tight and only sleeping when she held him or rocked him in her arms. Olivia walked the floor with him at night and endured enough baby vomit to gross anyone out. But she never left the little boy's side.

Two days after Eli was finally well enough to return to his nursery school, Olivia began to feel sick and came home from work.

"You are sick," he said shaking the thermometer, before he stuck it into her mouth.

"I'm fine," she mumbled. "I'm just a little tired."

"You have the chills and you have been nauseated. You're sick."

"I'm sure I will be fine," she insisted.

"Liv, you just spent three and a half days with Eli while he was sick. It just makes sense that you would be exposed to whatever virus it was that he had. 101, back in bed."

"I feel fine. I appreciate you looking out for me, but…."

"But, nothing. Get your ass back into bed. I have already called Cragen and he said they can cover you for the next couple of days."

"Couple of days? You have got to be kidding me!"

"It took four days to run through Eli's system."

"I just missed five days of work, Elliot. I can't keep taking off."

"Alright, you can go back."

"Good," she said throwing back the blankets from the bed and standing up.

"Just as soon as the doctor releases you," he said pulling her by the arm back into the bed. "Until then, you stay right here. I'll bring you some soup and more medicine at lunch. You need to get some rest."

"Elliot, I have way too much work to do."

"You are never going to get better if you don't take care of yourself."

"Okay, you're right. I give up. I feel like hell and I am going back to bed."

Elliot pulled the blankets up around her and tucked her in. He sat a bottle of water on the night stand beside the bed and smiled at her as he stood to leave.

"You sure you're alright?"

"I will be. I probably just need to sleep it off."

"Okay, you call me if you need anything. I'll come home for lunch and Maureen will be home this afternoon. She can pick the kids up from school and keep them out of you hair until I get home. Try to get some rest."

"I will. Thanks, El."

"You're welcome."


	15. 15 The Little Things

_Playing House_

_(Chapter Fifteen: The Little Things)_

"Whoa, you look like Hell."

Olivia raised her head and exhaled.

"Thanks, Case. I actually feel like Hell."

"Why are you at work?" Casey asked sitting down at the empty desk across from her.

"I just came in to check my messages, before my doctor's appointment."

"So, what's wrong with you?" Casey asked studying the label on the bottle of Pepto Bismol as Olivia took a swig.

"Apparently, I got that virus from Eli when he was sick. I have been running fever and throwing up for two days straight."

"Are you sure you're not pregnant?"

"That is so not funny!"

"Well, you said it yourself, you guys are having a lot of sex lately."

"So."

"Do you use condoms?"

"No. We're married. And I'm on the pill."

"The pill?"

"Yes."

"It isn't bullet proof, Olivia. I can name half a dozen women who got pregnant while on the pill."

"And how many millions of women haven't?"

"So, how do you know you're not knocked up?"

"Casey, please just back off and leave me a lone."

"I didn't mean anything by it."

"I know, you didn't. I just feel like crap and my head is pounding."

"But have you thought about it? I mean some of the symptoms you are having are also the first signs of pregnancy."

"You think I haven't thought of that?"

"Oh, my God. Do you really think you're pregnant?"

"I would know, wouldn't I? I mean, I would have missed my period or something, right?"

"You haven't missed any or been late?"

"No. And I didn't get sick until after I spent all that time taking care of Eli. I don't really even think I am. I am sure it is just the virus."

"Just the same," Casey said clearing her throat and leaning in to whisper to her friend, "maybe you should ask your doctor to do a test while you are there anyway."

"I will, but I'm sure it's nothing. Just do me a favor and don't say anything to Elliot, alright?"

"Of course I wont tell him."

Olivia stood up and combed her fingers through her hair.

"But you should," Casey said as Olivia looked back at her.

"I've gotta get going or I'm gonna be late."

"Liv, if you need someone to talk to….I am just a phone call away."

"Thanks, Casey."

Olivia sat on the table in her doctor's office.

"Olivia, what can I do for you today?" the doctor asked as he walked in looking at her chart.

"I've just been sick. I think it is probably this virus that is going around. My son was sent home from nursery school last week with it and I think maybe I got it from him."

"This says you have had fever and nausea?"

"Yes. Not just nausea, vomiting for two days now."

"Is there any chance you might be pregnant?"

"Umm, I am on birth control. But I can't be sure."

"Have you missed any menstrual cycles?"

"No."

The doctor looked up at her and smiled as he put a thermometer in her mouth.

"I can go ahead and administer a pregnancy test while you are here. If that's alright with you? If this is a virus, I can put you on medication to help. But some of these medications could harm a fetus if you are infact pregnant."

"Yes, I would like to go ahead and get a test while I'm here."

"You do have a low grade temperature."

Olivia watched as the doctor got into the cabinet and got out a little plastic cup with a lid.

"There is a rest room down the hallway. Just bring it back in here when you're finished. I will be back in a few minutes."

"Alright," Olivia said with a nod.

Fifteen minutes later, Olivia sat nervously waiting for the doctor to return with the results of her test. She clicked her feet together and chewed on her fingernail as elevator music played through the speaker in the ceiling.

"Damn it, come on. This freaking waiting is actually making me nervous."

"Olivia, I have the results of your test," the man said returning to the room as she sat at attention.

"Yes?"

"Your results are negative."

"Oh, thank God," she sighed in relief as the doctor stared at her.

"I take it you don't want children?"

"Well, we have five already. This was not planned and I am just not in a position to have a baby right now. I don't even know how I would tell him."

"I'll write you a prescription. A few days on this treatment and some rest and you will be fine. Make sure you get plenty of fluids."

"I will, thank you."

Olivia headed home with her prescription in tow. A few hours later Elliot came home to find the kids sitting at the table eating dinner.

"I ordered pizza, dad. Pepperoni and double cheese. Your favorite," Maureen said setting a place for him at the table.

"That is Olivia's favorite. How is Olivia?"

"She is okay. She's in bed. She got her medicine and she has been in bed most of the afternoon. I think she feels really bad, dad."

"I'm gonna go check on her," Elliot said picking up a couple of slices of pizza and putting them on a plate.

He moved to the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of water from the refrigerator. He pulled a TV tray from under the counter and folded it up placing the plate and water on it. He pulled a glass from the cabinet and poured half the bottle of water into it and laid a napkin beside the plate.

"Something's missing," he mumbled to himself looking around.

"Here dad," Kathleen said handing him a single long stem white rose from the dozen he had sent his wife the week before.

Elliot took the rose from his daughter with a smile.

"Thanks honey," he said laying the rose on the napkin beside the plate.

Elliot exhaled as he picked up the tray and the plastic bag he had brought home with him and headed down the hall to the bedroom to see his wife.

"Liv," he said softly turning on the lamp beside the bed.

She moaned softly and opened her eyes.

"Hey," she whispered.

"Hey. I brought you some dinner. The kids ordered pizza. Maureen said you haven't eaten anything all day."

Olivia sat up in the bed to look at him.

"Thank you," she said with a smile as Elliot sat the tray down on her lap.

She picked up the rose and smelled it.

"You brought me dinner in bed?"

"I didn't expect you to get up and come in to the table. You need your rest. But you also need to eat."

"I feel achy all over."

"How did your appointment go?"

"Okay. He gave me some pills and said get rest and drink plenty of water."

"How do you feel?" Elliot asked placing his hand against forehead. "You still feel a little warm."

"I've had chills, but I haven't thrown up in like six hours. I think that's improvement."

"Do you feel like trying some pepperoni and double cheese pizza? Or I can get you some chicken soup."

"I think the pizza will be fine. What's in the bag?"

"Oh, just a little something to help pass the time while you're stuck in bed."

Elliot opened the bag and handed her a couple of magazines and a DVD.

Olivia smiled.

"You brought me Cosmo?"

"And Glamour, the latest issues. These are the ones you read, right? And the video store finally had a copy of that movie you've been wanting to see."

"Yeah," she said with a smile. "I just don't know how you knew that."

"There are a lot of things I know about you. I pay attention to detail."

"Thank you."

"You're welcome. I just wanted to bring you some dinner and check up on you. I should really get back to the kids. I think Dickie needs help with a science project."

"Elliot?"

"Yeah?"

"Umm," Olivia pressed her lips together nervously, "there is something that I wanted to mention to you. It is nothing really…."

"Shoot."

"While I was at the doctor today, they umm….they gave me a pregnancy test."

"That's nothing?" Elliot asked folding his arms in front of him and sitting back on the edge of the bed.

"It was negative and I never really thought that I was pregnant. The doctor just said that they needed to know for sure before he gave me this prescription. But I wanted you to know, before you just saw it on the bill for the insurance. I didn't want you to freak out over something that turned out to be nothing. We have always been honest with each other and….well, I felt like you needed to know."

"I appreciate that. Good though, that it turned out to be nothing, I mean."

"Yeah, this would be a really screwed up time to have a baby."

"I guess you're right," he said moving for the door once more.

"Hey, if you're not doing anything later….you could keep me company while we watch a cheesy romantic comedy together."

Elliot smiled and nodded his head.

"Sure. Give me a little while to get the kids settled for the night. I have to supervise homework and give Eli his bath. I can meet you in here about ten o'clock."

"I'll be here," she joked.

Later that night Elliot climbed into the bed beside his wife with a bowl of popcorn and settled in to watch a movie he didn't even want to see. But being there with her and taking care of her, knowing that she was happy and on her way to being healthy once more was a more than satisfying feeling.

Elliot had always been a family man. Olivia was a big part of his family. She was a priority for him now, more than ever. And as he laid there beside her in their bed, with his arm around her and her snuggled into him with her head against his shoulder, Elliot realized that it was the little things, like these moments with her, that life was all about.


	16. 16 Birthday Sex

_Playing House_

_(Chapter Sixteen: Birthday Sex)_

Olivia raised her leg to buckle the strap on her shoe.

"There," she said with a nod as she turned to look at her reflection in the mirror on the back of the dresser. "Perfect."

She headed up the staircase to check on the children.

"Is everyone almost ready?" she asked as she pushed open the door to Eli's room.

"Almost," Maureen said buttoning up the white shirt of her baby brother's suit and clipping on his little tie.

"Look at you handsome," Olivia said kneeling as her favorite toddler came running for a hug.

"Lalivia," he mumbled throwing both arms around her neck and hugged her tight.

Olivia laughed and kissed him.

"I love you too, buddy."

"You look pretty," Maureen said with a smile.

"Thank you, honey. So do you. I love that necklace," Olivia said admiring a gold chain with a small diamond heart pendant.

"Thank you," Maureen replied twisting it in her fingers as she forced a smile, "it was my mother's."

Olivia smiled at her.

"Well, Eli is ready. What about the twins?" Olivia asked.

"Last I checked they were getting dressed. Elizabeth wanted help fixing her hair."

"Okay, I packed the diaper bag already. It is on the counter by the door. There are extra diapers and wipes, a sippy cup, a couple of juice boxes and some of those cookies he likes. Do you think we need anything else?"

"No," Maureen said with a smile at Olivia's first attempt at packing for the little boy, "I think you have it covered."

"Can you take him downstairs and check on Kathleen? I am going to get these two ready."

"Okay," Maureen agreed.

Olivia moved down the hall to see Dickie coming out of his bedroom playing with his tie.

"Three down, two to go," she said as she passed him in the hall.

"I'm hungry," Dickie groaned.

"We're going to dinner. Can you wait just a little while?"

"I'm starving, Liv."

"Okay, okay. Umm, cookies and juice. Only two cookies though. I don't want you to ruin your appetite. This is your dad's birthday dinner and we have been planning this for over a month. If we don't hurry we are going to be late."

"Two cookies, got it."

She stood outside Elizabeth's bedroom door and knocked softly.

"Elizabeth, sweetheart, it's Olivia. Can I come in?"

It was quiet for a moment and she heard the little girl crying.

"Elizabeth?"

Olivia pushed open the door to see her sitting in front of a mirror holding a hair brush.

"Honey, what's wrong?" Olivia asked kneeling beside her child to comfort her.

"I wanted to braid my hair. Like my mommy used to braid my hair, but I don't know how. I tried and it got all messy," she sobbed.

"Well, it can be fixed. Would you like me to help you?"

Elizabeth wiped the tears from her big blue eyes and nodded to Olivia. She raised her hand and placed the brush in Olivia's hand.

Olivia exhaled softly as she dragged the brush through Elizabeth's long blonde hair.

"I don't know how to braid," she confessed to the child. "But I bet we can fix it really pretty. Come with me," Olivia said leading her down the stairs into her room.

She sat the girl in front of the vanity in her bathroom and dug through a few drawers until she found what she was looking for.

"Here," she said with a smiled handing the girl an antique silver barrette.

"That's really pretty."

"Thank you. My grandmother gave that to me when I was about your age. It is very old and it is very special to me. I think it would be perfect for this special occasion."

"You're going to let me borrow it?" Elizabeth asked with a smile.

"You know what? How would you like to hold on to it for me for a while?"

"Really?"

"Yeah, if you can promise me that you will take really good care of it….it's yours."

Olivia watched as a big smiled crossed the little girl's face and all sign of tears had passed.

"I promise. Thanks Liv," Elizabeth said hugging Olivia tight.

"You are very welcome. Now lets get this in your hair."

Olivia brushed her long silky hair and pulled a portion back into the silver barrette.

"There we go. You look so beautiful and so grown up."

"Do you think daddy will like it?"

"I think your daddy will love it."

Just then they heard Kathleen screech from the other room. Olivia stood up and ran into the kitchen to find Maureen trying to hold Dickie and Kathleen apart as they swung on each other.

"I am gonna kill you!" Kathleen yelled swinging on her brother.

"Whoa, guys! What's wrong?" Olivia asked grabbing Dickie and sitting him down on the barstool.

"She hit me!"

"You're damn right, I hit him! He dumped grape juice all over my dress! Now it's ruined!"

"Guys, it is just juice," Olivia said trying to calm the children.

"Just juice?" Kathleen repeated pointing out the large stain on her white dress. "Just juice?"

"It was an accident," Dickie tried to explain.

"Now I don't have anything to wear," Kathleen said.

"I didn't mean to."

"I know you didn't," Olivia said.

"You should apologize Dickie," Maureen said. "Even if it was an accident and you didn't mean to."

Dickie looked up at his sister.

"I'm sorry I spilled juice on your dress. I didn't mean to and I am sorry."

"Fine. Whatever," Kathleen said folding her arms in front of her. "But being sorry doesn't make the big purple stain go away."

"Okay. Kathleen, honey, go into my closet and find something to wear. Anything you want. Just, something appropriate."

Kathleen nodded and headed down the hall.

"Everybody else, head to the car. Come on guys, we can't be late."

"We'll be in the car," Maureen said picking up Eli and the diaper bag as she ushered the twins toward the door.

"How's it going?" Olivia asked.

"You have such cool clothes," Kathleen said from inside the closet.

Olivia smiled.

"Thank you. Did you find something for dinner?"

"I can't make up my mind. I mean it, you have really great stuff."

"Lets see here," Olivia said as she looked through the hundred or so dresses in her closet. "What do you think of….this one?" She asked holding up a black and white knee length cocktail dress.

"I like that."

"And….these heels," she said handing Kathleen the shoes.

"Jimmy Choo's? You are gonna let me wear your six hundred and ninety five dollar Jimmy Choo heels?"

"Sure. It might help you recover from the trauma of your brother ruining your dress this morning."

"That dress was from the Sear's catalogue. And it in no way compares to these, the most amazing shoes in the universe."

Olivia laughed.

"And they go perfectly with the Valentino dress," Olivia pointed out watching as Kathleen's jaw dropped and she looked at the dress again.

"You are so awesome!"

Olivia laughed.

"They are just clothes."

"Amazing clothes! Amazing designer clothes! I have never owned anything designer in my life. Being one of five kids, that was just never really an option. Mom and dad never had the money."

"You know, I never had any of those things growing up either."

"And now you have an entire collection of the worlds best clothes."

"There was a time in my life when I thought that labels were very important," Olivia said inspecting another dress.

"And now you don't think they do? 'Cause I know someone who would really get good use out of these things if you don't want them anymore."

Olivia laughed.

"I guess I have just finally got my priorities straight," Olivia said tucking Kathleen's hair behind her ear. "And if you think I am just going to throw out all of my clothing, you have got another thing coming."

Kathleen laughed.

"Hey, you can't blame me for trying."

"But, I will make you a deal. As long as you take care of them and let me know what you take, I'll let you borrow anything you want."

"Seriously? Even the two hundred dollar jeans?"

"Like I said, they are just clothes. And you have been doing so good and trying so hard….your dad and I are really proud of you."

"Thanks, Liv."

"You are very welcome. Now go, get dressed. Quickly," Olivia encouraged her.

Kathleen squealed in excitement as she disappeared into bathroom to change her clothes.

Half an hour later Elliot finally arrived at the French restaurant they had chosen for his birthday dinner celebration. He walked into the restaurant, moving to the back room where they usually met for their family dinner nights. He had walked in expecting to have dinner with Olivia for his birthday, but what he found when he arrived was so much more.

There gathered around a large round table covered with gifts stood all five children, his wife and all of their friends from work.

"Surprise daddy," Elizabeth said with a big smile as he looked over the group.

"Thank you sweetheart. This was a very good surprise."

"Here dad, open your gifts," Dickie said handing him a long box from the table.

Elliot looked up at Olivia and smiled, then returned his attention to the children as they flocked around him with their gifts.

"So, tonight's the night?" Casey asked Olivia with a wink.

"Tonight is the night," Olivia agreed.

"One he'll never forget, I'm sure."

"Not if I can help it."

"Please, I saw you in that little black and pink ruffle thing. There is no way he is going to forget about that."

"It's his birthday."

"What exactly are you gonna do for him?"

Olivia stared at the sexy blue eyed man across the room and smiled.

"Anything he wants," she said without hesitation.

"Whoa," Casey said with a smile, "You guys need a babysitter?"

"No, actually, we don't."

"You are gonna have hot sweaty jungle sex with the kids in the same house? Liv, they will all need therapy!"

"The kids won't be in the house, Casey! Well, they will, but we won't. It's taken care of."

"Ahh, a romantic get away?"

Olivia grabbed Casey and pulled her further from the group.

"I booked a suite. Here, in the hotel. Maureen is keeping the kids at the house."

"All night?"

"All weekend."

"A suite? As in large room with a large bed?"

"And a large hot tub."

"Oh, I am so jealous. Seriously, dirty whore," Casey whispered pointing at Olivia.

Olivia laughed.

"It is his birthday. And I happen to like hot jungle sex….in hot tubs….I think."

"You _think_? What is there to _think_ about?"

"No, I know I like sex. I have just never had any of that sex in a hot tub."

"Never? You are in for a real treat."

Olivia laughed.

"I'd better tend to my guests."

After dinner, it was time for cake. Elliot only had one wish as he stared up at his family over the soft glow of the candles. He smiled at Olivia as he took a deep breath and blew them out.

"Yay daddy," Eli said as he clapped his hands.

"Yay daddy," Olivia repeated hugging the little boy.

After the cake Elliot joined his wife for a slow dance.

"Thank you," he said softly staring into her eyes. "It was really sweet of you to put all of this together."

"The kids and I wanted to do something nice for your birthday."

"Look around and tell me I am not the luckiest man in this room."

Olivia giggled.

"I have my family and friends. My Hawaiian shirt and my fishing pole," he said with a smile.

Olivia laughed again.

"I gave them money and took them shopping, but I let them pick out their own gifts. I thought it would be a little more personal that way."

"I know where Dickie got the idea for the fishing pole, but I am not sure where Elizabeth came up with the floral shirt."

"She said it was pretty."

"It is pretty," Elliot laughed. "And I love it because it was from my baby girl. I never would have bought it myself, but I love it."

"Well, she got really excited when you put it on over your shirt. You are such a good father."

"I try to be. They are my life. And after losing Kathy….I just want to protect them from anything else bad in the world. I am still having trouble believing that Eli will be two years old in a couple of months and he'll never remember Kathy at all."

"You and the older kids can tell him about her. He will know her through you."

"Liv, do you realize that you are the only mother he has ever known?"

"El…." she said tearing up a bit. "This is supposed to be a happy day and you are gonna make me cry."

"I meant it good. He loves you, they all do."

"I love them, too."

"We should probably get them home. Eli is getting tired."

"Yeah, I wanted to talk to you about that. I was thinking I could give Maureen my car keys and she could go ahead with the kids back to the house and give you and I a little time alone together."

"Alright. If you let me buy you a drink at the bar. We can make all of those guys jealous," he said looking at the men at the bar checking out his wife.

Olivia smiled.

"Deal," she said breaking away from him and heading back toward the crowd.

After the guests and the children had left, Elliot and Olivia sat at the bar talking for a while. Over an hour later Elliot decided it was time to go. Olivia took a sip from her rock glass as she slid something across the bar to him.

"What is this?" Elliot asked picking up the little white card.

"Give me ten minutes," she said leaning in against him.

Elliot stared into her eyes as she turned and disappeared down the hall.

A few minutes later Elliot received a text message from Olivia, but when he checked it all she had sent was the number 212.

Elliot laughed and paid the bar tab, then headed for the elevator. He walked down the hallway and unlocked the door. Inside the room was dimly lit with candle light. Elliot stepped inside and tossed his suit jacket over a chair in the corner.

"Liv?" he called across the suite as he stepped further inside. "God, please tell me I have the right room," he mumbled as he stepped into the doorway of the bedroom.

Elliot stood still for a moment as his jaw fell open and couldn't even speak. Sitting in the middle of the king sized bed, wearing a men's flannel pajama top and not much else, was his beautiful wife.

"Happy birthday," she said softly leaning back to expose just a hint of her black garters and stockings.

Olivia tipped her head and smiled as she unbuttoned the top two buttons on the shirt to reveal the black lace bra with little pink pinstripes. Elliot smiled, a bit embarrassed that he could think of nothing to say.

"Wow," he finally managed to spit out. "Well dear," he said without taking his eyes off hers, "what exactly did you have in mind?"

"We can do anything you want," she said softly, "any way you want to do it."

Elliot laughed for a moment scratching the back of his head and sure this was a joke.

"Liv, I…."

He stared at her for a moment as she raised up on her knees and slowly began to unbutton the shirt.

"You're serious?" he asked a little shocked.

"I am very serious," she said letting the shirt slide back on her shoulders fully revealing the lingerie she wore underneath.

Elliot stepped to the edge of the bed as Olivia raised up and leaned in to him. She wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him passionately. With one hand, Elliot cupped her jaw pulling her body deeper into his.

Olivia moaned softly as she brushed her nose against his and kissed him again.

"Tell me what you want," she whispered as she nipped at his earlobe.

Elliot smoothed his hands down her back over the shirt, then moved them slowly back up her long legs and cupped the curve of her ass.

"This has got to go," he said dropping the shirt to the floor beside the bed. "But I have never seen anyone make flannel pajamas look so sexy."

Olivia giggled and kissed him again.

"This, I….wow," he said running his fingers up the garter over her left thigh.

"Do you like it?"

"Oh, I like it," Elliot said with a nod.

"Happy birthday," she whispered kissing him and pulling his toward her as she unbuttoned his pants.

"Are you sure you feel up to this?"

"I'm sure. It has been a while. Elliot, we haven't had sex in over two weeks."

"You were so sick."

"I'm not sick now. I feel amazing and I am looking forward to a long night of hot birthday sex with my husband."

"Really?"

"Really," she said running her hand down his pants to stroke his already hard penis.

Elliot smiled nervously, she had never been this forward with him before. He watched as she laid down on the bed and arched her back as she stared up at him. Elliot smiled, thinking how much she reminded him of a pin up girl. Not just one of those women who pose naked for men's magazines, but one of the classy beauties like Bettie Page or Marilyn Monroe.

He crawled across the bed and laid beside her, pushing his hand slowly up under the short skirt as he kissed her.

"El, I was thinking we could do something a little different tonight."

"What did you have in mind?"

She smiled.

"What ever you want. I mean, if you want to try another position or have a fantasy or something?"

"Is there something you're trying to tell me? Is sex with me that boring?"

"It isn't boring. I want to make you happy."

"You make me happy."

"Elliot, when was the last time that you had sex and it wasn't in the missionary position?"

Elliot blinked and stared at her.

"I am giving you an opportunity that most men would die for. A free pass in the bedroom."

"You're right."

"So," she said sitting up and staring at him over her shoulder, "any ideas?"

"I have a few," Elliot said raising his eyebrow as he moved in behind her.

He moved his hands up under the skirt and kissed the back of her neck. He touched and groped and felt everything under and above her sexy black bra. Olivia moaned and turned her head to kiss him.

Elliot reached under the short skirt and pulled off her black thong. She looked back at him over her shoulder as Elliot pulled off his shirt and tossed it across the room. She sighed when he pulled her back and slid inside her.

"There we go," she moaned as Elliot began to move inside of her. "Oh yeah," she said softly.

"You like that?"

"Yeah I do," she gasped.

Elliot moved against her paying close attention to every sound she made and every curve of her perfect body. He closed his eyes and listened to her soft sounds, before long they were moaning together.

Olivia giggled as Elliot pushed her gently forward onto her hands and knees. He moved in her as she gripped the sheet on the bed. Elliot stared down at the ruffled skirt as he pulled her into him by the hips.

"Liv, wait."

"What?" she gasped turning to look back at him. "Is something wrong? Because I thought we were doing pretty good."

"No, baby, it's good. It's so good. You're great."

"Then why are we stopping?"

"I don't want to stop," he said with a shy smile.

"Neither do I," she replied as she stared into his eyes.

"I just want to be able to look at you."

"You are looking at me."

Elliot shifted to lay on the bed beside her. He used curled one arm around her waist to pull her in closer to him.

"Okay, this works, too," she said with a smile and that look in her eyes.

Elliot leaned in and kissed her as they continued the best sex either of them had ever had. He listened as her soft moans turned in to muffled whimpering, when she buried her face in a pillow.

"Am I hurting you?" Elliot asked.

"No," she gasped with a smile, "you can get a little rough if you want to. A little rough is good."

"It's good?"

Olivia giggled and moaned again.

"It is very good," she gasped. "Just keep doing everything that you're doing now."

Elliot smiled and kissed the back of her head. This wasn't necessarily the most romantic sex he'd ever had, but it was certainly hottest. Olivia felt the Earth begin to shake beneath them as she closed her eyes and gave in to the orgasm ripping through her body. He held tight to her feeling her body tremble against his.

"That's my girl," he whispered against her ear. "Look at me, baby. I want to see the look in your eyes when you come," he said locking his fingers in hers.

Olivia turned her head to look over her shoulder and into his loving eyes as he kissed her passionately. She whimpered softly in ecstasy and tightened her grip on his hand as she grew closer to her climax. As many times as they'd had sex together, neither of them had ever let go they way they were tonight. One part sweet and sexy, one part dirty, one part fantasy and one part secret love. This one time, here and now, was the closest they had ever been to one another. Or to anyone for that matter.

Elliot stared into her eyes moving a little faster and a little stronger with each thrust.

"Come for me baby," he chanted softly and she could feel the heat of his breath against her ear. "come for me."

Olivia reached over his back and scratched his shoulder. Elliot stared into her eyes and kissed her tenderly as they finished together. She gasped and laughed playfully as she laid on her back in the bed. She stared up at him and traced fingertip over the lines of his muscular chest as he kissed her tenderly.

"That was so good," she mumbled between kisses.

"I have to agree with you on that one."

Elliot laid down beside her and slid one arm behind her. He brushed his nose against hers and kissed her again.

"I know that wasn't exactly what you had in mind," he said softly as he gazed into her pretty brown eyes. "You wanted a wild night of sex and…."

"I wanted an incredible evening with you. And I got it. I just didn't want you to think that we always had to have boring missionary sex all of the time. I wanted to spice it up a bit for your birthday….for whenever."

"Liv, sex with you has never been anything less than amazing. Even the _boring _missionary stuff."

Olivia smiled.

"You don't like using other positions?"

"I do. I guess I just didn't think you would."

"I'm up for trying new things."

"Awesome," he said slipping his arms around to hold her. "Hey, didn't I see a hot tub in the other room?"

Olivia laughed.

"I was thinking maybe we could break that in a little later."

"We should call and check on the kids."

"I called on my way up here. Maureen has everything under control. I told her to call us if she needed anything. I was just gonna get the room for the night for a little time alone together. It was her idea to keep the kids so we could have a romantic weekend."

"Weekend? We have this room all weekend?"

"Check out is eleven o'clock on Sunday morning."

"Good. Because as I lay here I can think of at least half a dozen other things I would like to try," he laughed. "And they all require a little privacy."

Olivia smiled as she placed her palm against the place on his chest where she felt his heart beating.

"Do you think all married couples have sex as good as ours?"

Elliot smiled.

"For their sake, I hope so. Hell, I hope everyone has sex this good."

Olivia laughed.

"It was pretty incredible. And the funny thing is that we just had the most amazing sex of my life and I am not even naked."

"I like this," he said tracing his finger tip over one of the little pink pin stripes. "It is so sexy." Elliot smiled. "We can rest for a little while. Then I will work on getting you out of the rest of your underwear."

She raised up and leaned forward until her mouth met his in a slow, but passionate kiss.

"Happy birthday," she whispered softly.

"I think that this has been the best birthday I have ever had," he said getting lost in her eyes again, "and it is all thanks to you."

"I'm tired," she said softly as she settled in against her pillow and pulled his arm back in around her.

"Good night darlin," Elliot whispered as he kissed her forehead.

Olivia smiled, never thinking until this moment that she would ever like a man to call her _darlin_.

"Good night, El."


	17. 17 Birthday Sex Part II

_Playing House_

_(Chapter Seventeen: Birthday Sex Part II)_

Elliot groaned softly as he opened his eyes to see her staring at him.

"Good morning beautiful," he said with a smile.

Olivia giggled.

"Good morning," she said softly stretching as she sat up in the bed. "What would you like to do today?" she asked with a smile.

"I have a few ideas," he said tracing his finger over her full lips.

"Hold that thought," she said pushing him back. "I just want to get freshened up first. Morning breath," she whispered as she climbed from the bed and tiptoed across the carpet toward the bathroom.

"My God," Elliot mumbled to himself at the sight of her in the black and pink bra and matching ruffled skirt once more.

He cleared his throat and smoothed his hands over his face as he climbed from the bed as well. He walked across the room and leaned against the doorway watching her brush her teeth. She stared at her reflection in the mirror, not even noticing him standing there behind her. Elliot watched as she leaned forward over the counter to reach a miniature bottle of complementary mouthwash. As she did, the little ruffle of her skirt raised just a little higher allowing him a peek at her perfect ass.

Elliot couldn't help but smile in approval as he watched her. How was it he had worked side by side with this woman for nearly twelve years and never realized how beautifully put together she was? He watched as she put the cap back onto the bottle of mouthwash and put it back into the medicine cabinet.

He stepped in behind her and slipped his arms around her waist as she closed the cabinet.

"God, you scared me," she gasped as he hugged her tight and nestled his cheek against hers.

"I didn't mean to."

Olivia smiled as she turned to face him and wrapped her arms around his neck. She kissed him slowly and tenderly at first and he caressed each curve of her body. Elliot combed his fingers through her hair and the kisses became more passionate.

Olivia moaned as he cupped his hands on each side of her butt and lifted her onto the counter. She laughed playfully as he kissed across her chest and traced his fingertip along the lace ruffle on the top of the bra. He grasped her breasts through the bra squeezing them as he stared into her eyes.

He kissed her neck and down her shoulder as he unclasped the bra and dropped it onto the counter. Elliot grabbed a fist full of Olivia's hair and used it to tip her head back exposing the soft skin of her throat. She moaned seductively as he sucked on the tender flesh he found there.

Elliot leaned her back against the mirror as he kissed and sucked on her breasts. He reached under the short skirt and pulled off her lacy black thong. He slid her hips down to the edge of the countertop and pulled down his boxers.

Olivia gasped and moaned softly as he slid himself inside of her. She smoothed her fingers up and down his back as he moved inside of her. He watched as Olivia closed her eyes and whimpered softly, her body beginning to tremble. He slid her closer to him allowing him to move deeper inside of her as he pulled her knees up under his arms.

Elliot leaned forward and kissed her passionately, knowing that she was so close already. There was so much more he wanted to do to her, with her, but there wasn't going to be time for any of that now. He felt his own orgasm building up inside and knew that his release would soon follow. Laying asleep all night dreaming sexy dreams of her had him ready to come the first moment he found himself inside of her and he wouldn't be able to hold it off much longer.

Olivia giggled and fell back against the mirror as he collapsed on top of her. It didn't last long, but every single second of the sex was intensely satisfying. She combed her fingertips through his short hair and kissed him.

"Wow," she whispered.

"I can't even think of the words to describe how magnificent that was," Elliot said kissing her again.

"Who would have thought a morning quickie on the bathroom sink could be that hot?" she said as he raised up and smiled at her.

"I'm sorry it didn't last longer. I guess I have kind of been working up to that since last night."

Olivia laughed.

"I love morning sex."

"Really? We usually do it at night."

"It is always so intense and awakens every nerve in my body. It is almost like…."

"Like what?"

She smiled a shy smile.

"Like you were harder. Not with your movements, just….I don't know. It was different."

"Better?"

"Not that the sex any other time isn't wonderful. It was just different."

"Might have something to do with that morning wood," he joked and she laughed again.

"Well, we will have to be careful not to waste that anymore."

Elliot arched his back and kissed her again as he pulled out of her. She watched as he pulled up his boxers and walked across the bathroom. He reached into the shower stall and turned on the hot water, then looked back at Olivia.

"Would you like to join me?" he asked reaching for her hand as she slid off the counter.

"Alright, but no funny stuff."

Elliot laughed.

"I couldn't do that again right now if I wanted to. But I promise we'll try again later."

Olivia smiled and stepped out of the little ruffle of a skirt as she stepped into the shower with her husband. She sighed as he massaged shampoo through her hair.

Elliot couldn't help but wish he had the energy to do something amazing in the shower, but sex just was not an option right now. He closed his eyes and enjoyed the romantic high he got from the sweet smell of her cherry blossom shampoo. He soaped up a washcloth with her body wash and smoothed it over her entire body. He dropped the washcloth into the floor of the shower and gently massaged the skin of her back sending chills up her spine.

Elliot wrapped his arms around Olivia and turned her around to face him. The whole thing seemed choreographed like some sort of intricate dance. He kissed her slowly and passionately, then backed her slowly under the fall of hot water. He worked his fingers through her hair, rinsing away the shampoo.

Olivia kissed him tenderly as he nipped at her earlobe.

"That was amazing," he whispered against her ear as she slid the door open and reached for a bath towel.

"There is more where that came from," she taunted.

Elliot winked at her as she wrapped herself in the towel and disappeared into the other room. He stepped back under the water and quickly washed off. When he returned to the bedroom, Olivia was sitting on the edge of the bed with a towel drying her dark hair.

"I was thinking we could go downstairs for a little breakfast," he said pulling on a tee shirt from his bag. "Get a little nourishment before we come back up here and try that again."

"El, you read my mind. Well, sort of."

"Sort of?" he asked as he watched her dress.

"Well, when I thought it, it was more of a hang out naked in bed and wait for room service kind of thing."

"Breakfast in bed, huh?"

Olivia smiled.

"I guess we could save that for dinner."

"No way, there is an amazing restaurant around the corner and I want to take you out to diner tonight. Kind of a thank you for the wonderful weekend, sort of thing. But we can have breakfast in bed tomorrow before check out. I promise."

Olivia smiled.

"I'm gonna hold you to that."

In the elevator Elliot put his arm around her and locked his fingers between hers. Olivia smiled and held tight to his arm, loving the way it felt to belong to someone. As the elevator doors opened he placed his hand in the small of her back and escorted her into the dining area.

At the table they laughed and talked over Belgian waffles and fresh fruit. Olivia would just smile shyly and turn away when she'd catch him staring at her.

"Look at that," he said looking in the direction of the bar.

Olivia looked over her shoulder to see two men sitting at the bar checking her out.

"They have not stopped looking over here since we came in."

"Maybe they're checking you out," she said with a smile.

"I'm sure that's it," he laughed leaning across the table and pulling her in for a passionate kiss.

Olivia laughed.

"Are you trying to make them jealous?"

"Of course. Just want them to back off my wife."

"I've got this," she said turning around and smiling at them as she waved and flashed the large diamond ring in their direction.

Elliot laughed as the men shook their heads and turned back around.

"You told them," he said slipping his fingers between hers again.

"Why don't we go do something today?" Elliot asked as he wiped a bit of syrup from her bottom lip with his thumb.

"Do what, exactly?"

"I don't know. Something. Just go out and spend the day together enjoying our city. We are always at work or at home with the kids. When was the last time you just spent the day doing whatever? Without any plans?"

"You are absolutely right. We have not had a day off together since….ever."

"Not without half a dozen kids anyway," he joked.

"Alright, let's go," she said with a smile.

Elliot paid for breakfast and they headed out into the city to explore. They visited a couple of museums and admired some artwork from a couple of aspiring artists. They walked through the park and watched as a group of grade school children played and fed the ducks in the pond. They sat in the benches and watched a peewee football game, cheering on the under dogs.

"You having a good time?" Elliot asked leaning into her.

"I'm having a great time," she said with a soft smile tossing another piece of popcorn into her mouth. "Can you imagine Eli out there? Running around, playing football with his little friends?"

"He'll be two in a couple of months. These boys are about five. It won't be long."

"They are so adorable with their little jerseys."

"You hungry?"

"Elliot, I have just eaten almost an entire bag of popcorn."

"I thought we could hit that place on St. Marks in the East Village and get one of those amazing gyros."

"Mamoun's Falafel? Now I am hungry," she said with a smile. "Those are my favorite."

"I know," he said with a smile.

"The lamb there is so good," she said with an excited child like grin as they stood to go.

After lunch they headed back to the hotel room. The door to their room had barely shut when Elliot grabbed her and backed her against the wall, kissing her.

"Okay," Olivia giggled as she reached down to unbutton the fly on her jeans.

Elliot kissed her and fumbled with his belt buckle, but got distracted by his half naked bride and gave up. Olivia turned them so that he was against the wall. She kissed him, then backed away from him and danced around slowly as she removed her tee shirt and blue jeans.

She smiled and raised an eyebrow to him as she made her way back to him. Her lips pressed to his as she reached down with one hand and unbuckled his belt. She smiled and teased his mouth with hers as she reached under his boxers to rub her palm against his penis.

"I see that I've got your attention," she said in a sexy voice as she unbuttoned his shirt with her free hand.

Her fingertips danced ever so lightly across his bare chest giving him goose bumps and sending a chill up his spine. She placed soft warm kissed all over his chest and trailed her tongue down, down, down where she kissed the waist of his denim jeans. Elliot moaned and gulped as she smiled and lowered herself to her knees. Olivia had complete control of him and she knew it.

Elliot stared down at her as she lowered his jeans to the floor and pulled his boxers down allowing her access. He was just a bit embarrassed when his rock hard erection sprang upward as she pulled his shorts down. Olivia, however didn't seem to mind at all. She tipped her head back and stared up at him with hungry eyes.

Elliot watched as she pressed her lips together, then traced the tip of her tongue over the head of his penis. He moaned, unable to hold it in any longer. She felt so good and seemed to know exactly what she was doing. Moments later Olivia was moaning softly, adding an even greater sensation to the sensation blow job she was giving him.

"Is that good?" she whispered as she stared up at him.

"Oh yeah, that is…." Elliot moaned and rolled his eyes back in his head as she lowered her mouth onto him again.

He tangled his fingers in her hair and laid his hand on the top of her head. He wasn't quite guiding her, but feeling every movement she made, somehow made this even better.

"Liv?" he groaned unable to believe she had brought him to a climax already.

"Yeah?" she asked looking up at him as their eyes met.

Elliot couldn't speak, so he just nodded his head.

"Yeah," he finally managed to grunt out as she raised up and put her mouth over him again.

They had never been like this before and he wasn't exactly sure how she preferred to do this. But she moaned softly and welcomed him back into the warmth of her mouth, giving him the go ahead. Elliot closed his eyes and listened to the soft sounds she made and concentrated on the way she felt around him and there it was. She had just done something for him that he had longed for and had always been refused by his wife.

Olivia raised her hand to her mouth and looked up at him as if asking for his approval. Elliot smiled and placed two fingers under her chin raising her to her feet once more to kiss her.

"That was so good," he whispered as he kissed her again.

Elliot backed her across the room and laid her down on the bed. She watched as he stepped out of his jeans and boxer shorts, then returned his attention to her. Elliot started on the top of her foot next to her passion pink painted toenails and kissed his way up. Each kiss getting him just a little closer and her a little wetter in anticipation.

Olivia gasped as he moved around to the inside of her thigh and slid her knees apart. He slipped his fingers under her pink lace panties and moved them slowly inside of her. He watched as her bottom lip quivered and he raised up to kiss her again.

Elliot smiled and laughed playfully as she brushed her nose against his. She whimpered when he moved his hand pulling his fingers out of her. He kissed across her collar bone and down between her breasts, continuing his way all the way down, then stopping just below her navel. He looked up at her and smiled at their eyes met.

He slid his fingers under the soft material of her panties and pulled them off. Olivia shifted nervously waiting to see what exactly he planned to do with her next. Elliot moved down and pulled her closer to him. Olivia locked her fingers in his and closed her eyes as she felt his tongue moving against her.

Her body shuddered and she arched her back as he went down on her. Elliot listened to her soft sounds she made as she moved in reaction to him. Olivia gasped and whimpered as she pressed her lips together and stared down at him. She laughed playfully as she moved her fingers over the top of his head.

Elliot raised up and laid beside her on the bed to stare into her eyes. He kissed her and just when he started to make his move, she stopped him.

"Wait," she gasped.

Elliot gulped and blinked in confusion.

"Huh?"

"The hot tub," she whispered. "I want to use the hot tub."

Elliot turned to look what seemed miles across the room at the empty tub.

"Now?"

The lack of oxygen to his _actual _brain had reduced his vocabulary to one word sentences.

"Yes, now. It will only take a minute," she said sitting up and climbing from the bed.

He watched as she started the water and pulled her hair into a clip. She smiled as she looked back at him.

"Don't you want to?"

"Yes," he gulped not sure how much longer he could go without throwing her to the floor and taking her.

Elliot fell back on the bed for a moment and stared up at the ceiling. He hadn't noticed it before but the area above the bed had mirrored tiles.

"Hey you," she said crawling over his body to kiss him. "I didn't mess up the mood did I?"

"No," he said shaking his head as he kissed her again.

"Good," she said as a smile spread across her face, "because I want this to be something wonderful. I have never had sex in a hot tub, have you?"

Elliot shook his head as she lead him across the room to the tub.

"Go ahead and get in. I'm gonna turn on the bubbles."

Elliot climbed in and eased himself into the heat of the water. If she felt half as amazing as this water did, this was gonna be the best moment of his life. He watched as she turned on the jets and felt like he would melt as they began to beat against the muscles in his back.

Olivia walked across the room and turned on some slow music. She pulled out the bottle of champagne they had opened the night before and poured two glasses, then lit a couple of candles and made her way back to the tub.

"You don't think this is trashy or slutty, do you?" she asked handing him a glass and taking a sip from hers.

"No," he said shaking his head.

"Because I'm not a slut. I have just never really….experimented with sex," she said staring into her glass. "I'm curious, I guess."

Elliot smiled and took the glass from her hand, setting it on the edge of the tub beside his. He sat up to guide her into the tub with him.

"Neither have I," he said softly kissing her. "And I don't think you are slutty or trashy."

"No?"

"No," he said shaking his head. "I think that it is great you are willing to try new things," he said tracing his fingertip over her lips. "How do you know if you like something if you never try it?"

Olivia smiled as he sat back down. She lowered moved closer to him and lowered herself to her knees. She moved closer and kissed him tenderly as Elliot positioned her on his lap facing him. He stared into her eyes and she smiled a shy smile.

"Don't be embarrassed," he said. "So we are both a little inexperienced, that's okay. We can learn together," he said kissing across her collar bone as he pulled the clip from her hair. "I like it better down," he said softly and she smiled.

They kissed and just felt each other under the water for a few moments. When he was sure she was ready, Elliot helped her to raise up and lined himself up with her. Olivia bit her lip nervously as she slid down onto him. At first the feeling of him inside her was a little uncomfortable, she had never had sex in water before and it was a little different. But as they kissed and touched and moved slowly, he began to feel so good.

Elliot reached behind her and unclasped the pink bra she wore. By now it was a bit wet from the splash of the bubbles. She had an amazing body and looked incredible naked, but here in the steam and bubbly water, with her damp hair all messy looking, she was the sexiest woman he had ever seen.

Olivia moaned and tipped her head back as he raised upward to push inside of her. He placed both hands on her butt to move her on him. Once they got past the initial difference in the sex, they both seemed to really enjoy it.

He kissed and touched and sucked on her as she moved on him. They both groaned and moaned and kissed as they made love for over an hour in the steamy water. When they had finished Olivia leaned forward to lay her head against his chest as she tried to catch her breath.

"Wow," she whispered.

Elliot smiled.

"Yeah wow," he agreed.

"Casey was right. Hot tub sex is pretty amazing."

Elliot tipped his head to look at her.

"You talked to Casey about this?"

"Just girl talk."

"But you talk to her about us and sex?"

"Well, she knows we have sex. But I don't give her any details. It drives her nuts."

"You could. I mean, if you wanted to, tell her how amazing it is, I mean. I don't mind, we have only good things to tell."

"No, it's personal. Kind of like a really good secret between you and I. What about you? Do you tell the guys about our sex life?"

"No."

"Don't they ask? I could see Fin wanting all of the details."

"Maybe, if you weren't like a sister to him. Anytime either of them ask about anything I just head it off before the conversation gets too heavy. I start talking about all of the romantic parts and they bail out before I even get close to talking about the sex stuff."

Olivia laughed.

"So, it is just our little secret," he said kissing her.

Olivia exhaled as she ran her fingers through her hair.

"It is one hell of a secret," she said with a smile.

Elliot smiled and pulled her in against him, just holding her while they soaked together in the hot tub and finished their champagne.


	18. 18 Finding A Way To Say Goodbye

_Playing House_

_(Chapter Eighteen: Finding A Way To Say Goodbye)_

Elliot stared down into her pretty brown eyes as they made love. Olivia tipped her head back and moaned her sexy moans as he moved inside of her. Elliot had never before felt the way he felt when he made love to her. When they were together it was not only the best sex he had ever had, but something much, much more.

He groaned as the alarm clock sounded beside them and slammed his hand down to shut it off. In the process of getting to know his new wife's wants and desires, he had come to the conclusion that Olivia really enjoyed morning sex. She seemed to really enjoy it any time they had sex. Of course the sex was amazing and you would have to be without a pulse not to enjoy it.

Elliot kissed her tenderly and fell beside her in the bed as they both gasped to catch their breath.

"What a way to start the day," Elliot gasped as he stared up at the ceiling and laughed.

He reached forward and brushed a bit of hair from her eyes as she smiled softly. Elliot watched as she slid to the edge of the bed and wrapped the sheet around her body.

"We still have a little while before we have to get up," he said watching her move across the room to the closet. "I mean, if you want to lay back down and unwind for a little while." He smiled and laughed, "or at least catch your breath."

"I was thinking," she said without looking at him, "maybe we shouldn't do this anymore."

"You didn't enjoy it? Because I will have to admit, I thought that was incredible."

"I enjoyed it," she said softly as she pulled clothes from her dresser drawer, "I just think it would be easier if we stop now."

"Alright," Elliot exhaled as he laid back against the bed and watched her walk into the bathroom.

He had always known this was part of the agreement, but giving her up wasn't going to be a simple as he had thought it would be. He stood up and stretched, then got himself dressed for the day. He walked into the kitchen and poured them both a cup of coffee, then made his way back to the bathroom door. Elliot stood there for a moment realizing that Olivia's clothes were still laying on the dresser and the shower wasn't running.

"Liv?" he asked knocking on the door. "I brought you coffee."

"Just a minute," she answered and she sounded a little strange.

"Liv?" he said softly, tapping once more.

This time she didn't answer.

"Liv?" he asked again and he could hear her crying. "Olivia, sweetheart? Is everything alright?" he asked opening the door just a bit.

"I'll be out in a minute," she said as he looked up to see her leaned against the wall in front of the sink.

"Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," she said trying to hid the tears. "It's allergies….my allergies are acting up."

Elliot stepped into the bathroom and raised her chin, forcing her to look at him.

"As long as I have known you, you have never had trouble with allergies," he said wiping a tear from her cheek and handed her some tissue. "Now do you want to tell me what is really going on?"

"It's silly, really. I was just thinking how great things have been going and how 'D' day is right around the corner. I started thinking about the kids and how much I am going to miss them."

"Liv, I am not going to keep you from the kids. You know that, right? You can see them any time you'd like. I don't expect you to just drop out of their lives."

"How are we going to tell them, Elliot? They have finally started doing good in school and getting along, they are staying out of trouble. It's like their lives have finally straightened out. How do we make them understand why we did this without making them feel betrayed? How do we tell the kids that our entire marriage was a big lie?"

Elliot was quiet for a moment as he stared at his reflection in the mirror. There was no way the kids were going to fully understand the reasons why he and Olivia had lied to them and everyone around them.

"We don't."

She looked at him waiting for him to explain.

"You're right. They're not going to understand. I know I said before that we would just discuss it with them, but maybe it would be better if we didn't."

"How do we tell them that we're getting divorced?" she asked.

"We will just sit them down and explain to them that it wasn't working out. We will just tell them that we are not right for each other. And we will let them know that we care very much about each other and we will always be friends and that we both love them and we are always going to be here for them."

"This is going to hurt them, isn't it?" she asked looking at him through tears.

"I think they will be okay once they know that we are okay."

Olivia sighed and leaned over the sink to splash cool water on her face. He watched as she patted it dry with a hand towel and tried to cover up the fact that she had been crying.

"We'd better get going or we're gonna be late," she said moving past him back into the bedroom.

"We _are_ going to be okay. You know that, right? You and I are going to be just fine."

"I know," she said softly.

"Olivia," he said as she exhaled nervously and stared at him, "you are my very best friend. And I am never going to forget what you have done for me."

Elliot closed his arms around her and hugged her tight, holding her for a moment. Olivia stood there wrapped up in her sheet with tears rising in her eyes once more. She closed her eyes and laid her head against his chest as she listened to his heartbeat. She knew that in the back of her mind this was the one thing that worried her the most. Elliot kissed the top of her head and she slowly turned away from him.

"I left your cup of coffee on the night stand," he said softly leaving the room so she could dress for the day.

Elliot watched her as she walked into the kitchen and sat her empty coffee mug into the sink.

"Are we ready?" Elliot asked handing Elizabeth her book bag.

"We're ready dad," Kathleen said picking up Eli as she walked toward the door.

"Actually," Olivia said softly, "I'm gonna take my car today. There are some things I need to do after work."

"You guys go on out and get buckled in," Elliot said to the kids.

"Okay. Bye Liv," they all said waving.

"Bye guys. Have a great day at school."

"Yeah dad," Kathleen said rolling her eyes, "that will happen."

Olivia laughed as the kids walked out the door and she grabbed her keys and purse.

"What have you go going on?" Elliot asked.

"I thought I would start getting the apartment ready for when I do move out. Everything needs to be cleaned and the guys are coming this evening to deliver the bed I bought."

"You bought a new bed? What's wrong with the bed you have?" he asked.

"You're sleeping in it," she said with a smile. "I am trying to get things set up to make this transition easier on the kids. Then I can go ahead and start staying there before we actually file. I didn't see any point in taking the bed from here and leaving you nothing to sleep on when I can just get a new one and have it already set up for when I start staying there. I'm going to start taking some things over a little at a time so that when I do move out all that's left to do is pack my clothes."

"Good thinking. You'll be home for dinner, right? Because the kids might think something is up if you're not."

"I'll be home for dinner," she replied pulling the strap of her purse over her shoulder and heading out the door.

Elliot watched her go, knowing that one day really soon she wouldn't be coming home and he was going to miss her like crazy.

That evening after work Olivia unlocked the door to her apartment and watched as the furniture store delivery men carried in the new bed. She dusted off the furniture and cleaned the place up a bit to make it livable again. She unzipped the duffel bag she had packed from the house and laid her clothes out into piles on the new bed. She pulled some of the free hangers from the closet and began to put the clothing away. A few more trips and she would pretty much be moved back in.

Olivia sighed and pulled out the new bedding she had purchased for her new life as a divorcee. She made up the bed and laid down across it on her back staring up at the ceiling for a moment.

"This is going to take some getting used to," she said rolling over and hugging her pillow.

Olivia laid there for a few minutes a little depressed about the situation she now found herself in. She had known from the start that this was the way things were going to be, but she hadn't known that losing it all would make her feel this way. Just as she began to cry, her cell phone rang.

"Benson," she said answering the phone as she wiped a tear from her cheek.

"Liv?"

"Maureen? Honey, is everything alright?"

"Everything's fine. We were just wondering when you were coming home? Kathleen, Elizabeth and I are making dinner for you and dad, and it's almost ready."

Olivia smiled, just the thought of being a part of the lives of these five amazing children made her feel like and important part of a family.

"I'm on my way now. I will be home soon."

"Good," Maureen said and Olivia could hear the smile in her voice.

That night after dinner and homework were finished and the kids were all tucked into bed, Olivia sat down on the edge of the bed to have a talk with her husband.

"Elliot, if we are going to do this, I think we should do it now," she said watching him for a reaction.

Elliot looked up at her for a moment in silence.

"The longer we wait, the harder it is going to be on the kids and everyone involved," she continued waiting for him to object.

"I agree," he said and she felt a knot rising in her throat.

"You do?"

"Dragging this out is only going to make it harder for everyone. That's why I called my lawyer today."

"You did?" she said softly resisting the urge to break down and cry.

"He said we can come in tomorrow and he will draw up the paperwork for us to sign."

"That's it? We just sign some papers and it's all over?"

"Not quite. After that we'll have to go to court."

"Why?"

"Just to swear before the judge that we agree on the terms of the divorce papers. It isn't that big a deal. It will only take about an hour, once we get our court date. In and out."

"You're not nervous?"

"Not really. I'm not sure we have a reason to be. It will be a pretty simple process."

"I guess not. It isn't like we have anything to fight about. The kids aren't mine so there won't be any custody arrangements to make. You're keeping the house, so really there isn't anything to disagree about."

"This is liable to be the easiest divorce case he has ever had to handle."

"What happens after that?"

"You get your life back."

Olivia turned out the bedside lamp and laid down as she felt tears rising in her eyes again.

"Yeah," she said softly as she laid there in the dark.

The truth was Olivia wasn't sure she was ready to trade the comfort of her family life to go back to the loneliness of her life before Elliot and the kids came along. She rolled to face the wall and closed her eyes, praying that sleep would come soon.

One week later Olivia paced the floor in front of the large double doors to the courtroom.

"Liv, there is really no reason to be nervous," Elliot assured her.

"I'm not nervous," she lied as she stared into his eyes.

"You're right. It is better to just get it over with."

"We still have not figured out how we're going to tell the kids," she said hoping he had thought up some simple way that protect anyone from being hurt.

"I can handle it if you want."

"They are gonna think I've abandon them."

"I'll make sure they know better. And you are still going to be a big part in all of our lives."

"Their mother died and now I'm just going to just turn my back and walk away from them."

"Why don't we have dinner tonight? As a family. Then we can just explain to them that it just didn't work out. And we will tell them that you and I still care for each other and we are still best friends, we're just not going to be husband and wife anymore. Together, we will make them understand that just because you and I aren't married doesn't mean that we don't _both_ still love them and care very much for them. I want them to know that it is still okay for them to call you and talk to you and turn to you when they need you. You have been a wonderful parent and friend to these kids, Olivia. You are the only mother Eli will ever remember."

"Will he? Two years from now, five years from now, ten years from now? Will he remember me as his mother? Will he remember me at all? Remember the time when you and I were married and we were all a family? I'm not so sure he will, Elliot."

"Eli adores you, he is never going to forget you. None of the kids will. Olivia, you are going to see them all of the time."

"Elliot, are you ready?" the lawyer asked as he stepped approached them.

"We're ready," Elliot said holding the door for his soon to be ex-wife as they entered the courtroom.

"Now what?" Olivia asked as Elliot opened the car door for her about an hour later.

"I admit, that didn't quite go the way either of us had planned."

"Elliot, that judge just refused to sign divorce papers. I didn't even know they could do that."

"He just wants to make sure this is what we really want. You heard him, he wants us to do a trial separation because there are children involved. They asked us to separate first, to make sure that we have given enough thought to it and we are sure this is what is best for our family."

"Does he think that we would just make a decision like this without thinking it through?"

"I don't know for sure what he thinks, Liv. Except that he thinks we need to separate for a while before he will allow our divorce to go through. It's only six months. I was thinking maybe we could use this chance to break the news to the kids. You can go ahead and move back to your apartment like you had planned to do and it will give everyone around us a little time to accept the change before the divorce becomes final."

"Do you still want to tell them over dinner tonight?"

"I'm ready if you are. It's as good a time as any, I guess."

"What do you think we should have? I mean it is our last meal together as a family."

"What if we ordered in? Pizza or something, less mess and less stress. We will just sit them down and talk to them and explain it the best we can."

That evening the room was silent as they sat around the dinner table. Olivia watched Elliot nervously, waiting for him to make the first move toward sharing their big news with the children. Moments later she noticed Kathleen who seemed to be studying the looks between her parents.

"What's going on guys?" she asked softly, her eyes resting on her father's reaction to her question for a moment. "Don't say nothing. I can tell by the way you're acting that something is wrong."

"Actually guys, there is something that Olivia and I wanted to talk to you about."

Olivia watched as Maureen laid her salad fork against her plate to give them her undivided attention.

"Some important news," Elliot continued pausing for a moment.

"Olivia's pregnant," Kathleen guessed as everyone at the table turned to look at Olivia.

"No!" Olivia replied.

"Then what is it daddy?" Maureen asked.

Elliot stared into Olivia's eyes as he began to speak.

"After a lot of consideration, Olivia and I have decided to file for divorce."

"What?" the voices of the four older children echoed in the room.

Olivia gulped and stared at her plate unable to speak.

"Why?" Elizabeth asked. "Don't you love her anymore?"

"Of course I do, honey. But sometimes people, even people who love each other very much, just aren't meant to be married."

"I don't understand," Kathleen protested. "People who love each other don't get divorced! People who love each other fight to stay together! Why aren't you fighting?" she asked as she began to cry.

"I'm sure if you can just sit down together and talk about this, you could work it out," Maureen said softly.

"We have talked sweetheart," Olivia said softly. "We have talked for hours, night after night trying to make this work. But it just doesn't work, honey."

"This doesn't meant that we don't both love you all very much," Elliot reminded them. "And Olivia will still be an important part of all of our lives."

"So what happens now?" Kathleen asked leaning back in her chair and folding her arms in front of her.

"We spoke to a judge this morning. As of today we are in a temporary legal separation."

"What is that dad?" Dickie asked.

"It is like giving us the chance to try being apart while we decide for sure if this is what we want to do. But Olivia and I have talked it through and decided that we are getting a divorce. Olivia has already started moving some of her things back into her apartment. You guys will all stay here with me in the house. But she'll still come and visit us."

"Will you go to church with us?" Elizabeth asked in a mousy voice.

"Sure I will," Olivia answered the child. "And you guys can call me when ever you want to. You can even come spend the night at the apartment with me sometimes if you want to. I am still going to be here for you guys."

"This is stupid!" Kathleen snapped standing and throwing her fork down on the table with a crash.

"Kathleen! Sit down, we are going to discuss this as a family," Elliot instructed her.

"What's the point?" she said as tears streamed down both sides of her face. "You guys have already made up your minds. It doesn't matter how we feel about it anyway."

They watched as she wiped her cheek with the back of her palm and disappeared from the dining room, moments later they heard the door to her basement bedroom slam shut and music turn on downstairs.

"Anybody else?" Elliot asked looking around the table at the sad faces of his three older children and little Eli as he ate bites of his pepperoni pizza off his fork.

"May I be excused?" Elizabeth asked. "I'm really not hungry anymore."

"Me too," Dickie added.

"You can both be excused. But I want all homework done before TV and video games."

"Yes sir," they answered in unison.

"I'll get started on the dishes," Maureen said standing as she began clearing the table.

"Are you okay?" Elliot asked watching Olivia as she fed Eli the last couple bites of his pizza.

"I didn't want it to be this way," she said softly as tears began to fall from her eyes. "I didn't want them to get hurt."

"I know, neither did I. But we did what was best for them and this was the plan from the start. We knew it would be hard to follow through with."

"I know. I just didn't think it would be like this."

"Why don't you stay here tonight? I'll sleep on the sofa and tomorrow morning we can all have breakfast together as a family."

"I think me staying here will only make things worse. I should go."

"At least come by in the morning for breakfast. We can show them that you and I really are going to be alright. I think they will come around."

"They feel like we betrayed them. I feel like we betrayed them."

"It will be okay. Once they see that you and I are alright and we can all still function as a family, they will be alright. They are just afraid they are losing you. But they're not."

"I'm gonna give him a bath and get him ready for bed before I go," Olivia said excusing herself from the table as she picked Eli up and kissed the top of his head. "There's no reason I can't read him his bedtime story like I always do. Since I'm already here and all."

Elliot picked up the rest of the dishes from the table and moved into the kitchen. There Maureen stood at the sink crying as she washed dishes.

"Honey, it's going to be alright."

"I know," she sniffled. "But we're really gonna miss her."

"And any time you do you can go and visit her. Or she can come here and see you guys. Liv and I are still best friends, it is just better if we're not husband and wife."

"But it's not official yet, right? There is still time. What if I stay here and take care of the house and everyone and you and Olivia can take a vacation? Like a romantic getaway, just the two of you. You could surprise her. Get wine and roses and sweep her off her feet again. I know she still loves you dad! You can fix this!"

"Baby, some things just aren't fixable."

"But you don't even fight! I have never heard you fight! Not once!"

"No, we want to remain civil and we are working this out like adults. Yelling and fighting is only going to make this harder on everyone. The way it is now, we will walk away from this and still be just as good of friends as we ever were. If not better."

"I just don't understand."

Elliot kissed her forehead.

"The most important thing is that you guys always remember just how much Olivia and I both love you guys. Just because we are not married anymore, doesn't mean she no longer cares about you kids."

"We love her too, dad."

"I think it's important that you make sure to let her know that."

"We will."

"I love you, baby."

"I love you too dad," Maureen said as her father kissed her forehead.

Elliot walked upstairs to find Olivia sitting in the rocking chair in Eli's room reading to him from his favorite book. He watched as she rocked him slowly and spoke different voices for each character in the story. Eli held tight to his favorite blanket and rested his head against her shoulder as she read. He pointed to the pictures and helped her turn the pages and before long he was asleep in her arms.

"Goodnight little man," Olivia whispered carrying him to the crib and laying him inside.

She kissed him softly and covered him with the blanket as she raised the rail and placed his teddy bear beside him. Olivia exhaled and turned off the lamp on the table beside the crib leaving the soft glow of the Lightening McQueen night light to light the room.

"I'm gonna miss you," she said softly.

"He's gonna miss you too," Elliot said from behind her.

"Has Kathleen emerged from the dungeon yet?" she asked forcing a smile.

"Not yet. But I am sure it is safe for _you_ to enter."

Olivia smiled.

"I don't want to leave without telling all of the kids goodnight."

Elliot smiled back at her.

"The twins are in Dickie's room playing a game and Maureen is in the kitchen."

"Thanks El," she said softly. "For letting me be a part of all of this."

"I'm really glad you were," he said as she turned and walked into the bedroom to tell the twins goodbye.

After talking to each of the other children, Olivia moved to the basement to say goodnight to Kathleen, but the stubborn teen only rolled over to face the wall.

"I know you're upset. But I am still going to be here for you guys if you need me. I'm just a phone call away," Olivia said softly tucking a strand of blonde hair behind the girl's ear.

"Just go away," Kathleen mumbled. "You don't want to be here anymore, so go."

"Alright, but before I do I just want to tell you that I love you. I love all of you. And that isn't going to change just because my last name does."

Olivia closed her hand around Kathleen's and kissed it.

"Good night, Kathleen."

Olivia stood to leave, but as she turned around she heard a soft and shaky voice.

"Olivia?"

"Yeah?" she asked turning to face Kathleen once more.

"I don't want you to go," the girl said in tears as she wrapped her arms tight around her stepmother hugging her tight.

"I know you don't sweetheart," Olivia said fighting back her own tears.

"If it was something I did, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it. Sometimes I am just….just….a brat. I don't really even know why. But I wont get into any more trouble, I promise. I have been trying to stay out of trouble."

"I know you have," Olivia replied with a smile to lighten the mood. "You have stayed out of trouble and your grades are really good. I am so proud of you. But honey, this doesn't have anything to do with you or your brothers and sisters. This is something between your father and I. Adult problems and it just didn't work out. That doesn't mean that we don't still care for each other and for you kids. Because we do, we both do. Very much."

"We love you, too. And we're going to miss you."

"I'll tell you what. Why don't you and I have coffee one afternoon this week? Just you and me."

"Really?"

"Sure," Olivia said with a smile. "You pick a day and I will meet you after school."

Kathleen stared at her for a moment, then began to smile.

"How about Thursday?" she asked. "I have a big math test and I'm sure I could use the caffeine," she joked.

"Alright, Thursday it is. I will mark it on my calendar."

"Really?

"Yeah. I'm really looking forward to it."

Olivia took a deep breath and hugged her again.

"I really am sorry for all of the awful things I have said and done," Kathleen said.

"I wont hold it against you. You were going through a tough time. Sometimes I do things I wouldn't normally do when I'm having a rough time. The important thing is that you are past it now and you are a remarkable young woman."

Kathleen smiled.

"You really think so?"

"Yes, I do. You are smart and beautiful."

"You think I'm smart?"

"I know you are. And you have the grades to prove it!"

"I don't know, I have done a lot of stupid things."

"Yeah," Olivia laughed, "well, so have I. That doesn't mean you are stupid. You've made mistakes, we all do. The important thing is that you have learned from them."

"I guess so."

"You be strong, okay. The little kids are going to need you and Maureen to help them through this. And just remember if you need me, I am just a phone call away. Anytime," Olivia said kissing her forehead.

"I love you, Olivia."

"I love you too, honey. And I will see you on Thursday."

Kathleen nodded her head as she waved goodbye and watched Olivia walk back upstairs. She closed the door and leaned against it for a moment as she drew a deep breath.

"How'd it go?" Elliot asked.

"She'll be alright. I am meeting her for coffee on Thursday after school."

"Ahh," Elliot said with a smile. "Speaking of coffee, I just made some if you would like a cup."

"No, thank you. I should really get going, it's after ten and I have court in the morning. I just didn't want to leave without telling them all goodnight."

"You want me to walk you out?"

"No, it's alright. Umm, I'll come by tomorrow before the kids get out of school to get the rest of my things. It might be easier on them that way."

"Yeah, maybe."

"Well, I'll see you at work tomorrow."

Elliot smiled.

"See you at work."

At home Olivia tossed and turned unable to fall asleep. She stared up at the ceiling in the dark for a few minutes, then looked over at the clock.

"It's after midnight," she said to herself as she sat up and turned on the lamp beside the bed.

She exhaled and looked down at her phone for a minute. Knowing Elliot he was sound asleep and didn't even notice her missing. She pressed her lips together and opened her phone. No missed calls. No texts. He really didn't miss her at all. Yet, somehow here she laid alone in her bed unable to sleep because the annoying buzz of her husbands snoring wasn't keeping her awake.

She bit her lip as she dialed his number. Maybe hearing his voice would help her sleep.

"Hello," Elliot groaned as he answered the phone.

"El, were you sleeping?"

"Trying to be. Liv, it's after midnight. What's up?"

"I….umm…." she looked around the room for a minute as she sat up placing her feet against the carpet. "I can't seem to find my purse. I didn't leave it there by chance, did I?" she asked looking down at the black handbag beside the bed between her feet.

"No, I don't think so. You want me to go into the kitchen and look?"

"No, here it is," she exhaled as she closed her eyes.

"Liv?"

"Yeah?"

"Are you alright?"

"Yeah. I just can't sleep."

"You want me to talk to you until you fall asleep?"

Olivia laid back against her pillow and turned off the light.

"I'm listening," she whispered.

"What do you want me to say?"

"I don't know, anything."

"I remember the first day we met," he began. "You were so nervous and unsure of yourself."

"All of the other detectives looked at me like I was an alien, because I was female. I may as well have been from another planet."

Elliot laughed.

"Are you telling this story or am I?"

Olivia laughed.

"I'm listening."

"Cragen introduced us and we were off chasing down bad guys. And about the third day or so, it had been rainy for a few days and as we were walking down the street it started raining. I mean just pouring. And you were drenched and you looked up at me and I could tell you were ready to break down and cry, it had been that kind of week."

"I remember."

"Do you know what I remember? I remember thinking how beautiful you were. Standing there with your hair all scraggly hanging loose around your face where it had fallen loose and your pretty brown eyes tearing up threatening to cry. Then I said something stupid and made a complete fool of myself and you laughed. You have the most amazing laugh. Then I laughed. And we laughed together until we both cried. I knew then that you would be a wonderful part of my life. And I was right. You are my best friend Olivia, forever. And I don't know if I could live my life without you in it. We're going to be okay, right?"

"Umm hmm," she mumbled softly.

Elliot smiled, knowing she was almost asleep.

"Good night Olivia," he whispered softly.

"Night El," she breathed against the phone as she closed it and laid it on the night stand.


	19. 19 Tell it Like It Is

_**Playing House**_

_**(Chapter Nineteen: Tell It Like It Is)**_

_**THREE WEEKS LATER….**_

Olivia sat curled up on her sofa with a blanket and a cup of hot tea as she listened to the midday thunderstorm outside. She was thinking about all of the unexpected things that had happened in her life over the last year.

She had gone from being single and alone searching for love, to standing by her best friend during the hardest time of his life. She was a fiancée, a newlywed, a wife and mother, and was now well on her way to becoming a divorcee all within a year.

She pressed her lips together as the buzzer sounded, announcing the arrival of a guest. Olivia smiled and couldn't help but feel excited as she rushed across the room and pulled open the door.

"It's nice to see you too," Casey said staring back at her.

"Are you kidding? Of course it is nice to see you," Olivia replied with a smile.

"You don't have to act tough for me, Liv. I could see the disappointment in your face. You were hoping I was a certain blue eyed detective."

"I wasn't," she said shaking her head in denial.

"It's okay, it's been a tough couple of weeks. I don't blame you for wanting to see him. He is after all one of the most attractive members of the male species."

Olivia smiled.

"I thought we were supposed to have dinner tonight," Casey reminded her friend.

"Ahh," Olivia replied raising her hand to her forehead. "I'm sorry, I completely forgot."

"I thought you might be up for a little girl time to keep your mind off things."

"I have just been having kind of a blah day."

"Well, we could order in and just sit around here if you don't want to go out. Or I could go and give you some time alone. We could reschedule."

"No, you came all the way over here….in the rain! We should definitely do something. I'll grab the take out menus and you find us a movie," Olivia suggested handing her best girlfriend the remote control.

"I took a cab twelve blocks in the rain. Geez, you make it sound like I walked."

"Still, I have been a little down today and I really appreciate you coming over here. You really cheer me up."

"You know what would _really_ cheer you up?"

"What might that be?"

"Margaritas!"

Olivia laughed.

"I'm not really in the mood, Case. Besides, I have no alcohol and that would require going back out in that mess."

"Hey, some things are worth braving a little bit of rain."

"You would really go out in this for tequila?"

"For you doll? Anything!"

Olivia laughed.

"Thanks, Casey. But really I'm not in the margarita mood."

Later they sat on the sofa eating Chinese food from little paper cartons and watching some old movie when Casey realized that Olivia's mind seemed to be elsewhere.

"Do you want to talk about it?" she asked sitting her carton of garlic shrimp down on the coffee table in front of her.

"About what?"

"Whatever. Olivia, I know you well enough to know when something is bothering you. You have not said two words in the last two hours. Obviously something heavy is weighing on your mind. So spill it."

"I just can't help but feel like I failed."

"Honey, you didn't fail. Sometimes things just don't work out. Have you tried talking to him? I mean, maybe it isn't too late to try to work things out."

"I don't want to talk to him right now. And I don't think that working this out is really an option, Casey."

"It never hurts to try. I think the two of you should plan a romantic getaway. Go somewhere away from all the stresses of everyday life. Leave work and the kids behind for a few days and just focus on the two of you as a couple. Or maybe talk to someone, like couples therapy. I know of at least half a dozen couples who have actually managed to save their marriage simply by opening up to one another in therapy. It really helps you learn to communicate more clearly. I should know, I have been in therapy since my parents split when I was eleven years old."

Olivia looked worried.

"It was a joke."

"Sorry. I'm just not much fun lately."

"I'll have to admit, I was shocked when the two of you announced you were engaged. But I was even more so to hear you were separating."

"Thanks. I think."

"I guess I just kind of romanticized this idea where you and Elliot were the perfect couple with the perfect life. This is like when Prince Charles and Princess Di broke up. This is big."

"No pressure."

Casey exhaled.

"What it amounts to is the fact that I have no love life, so I have to live vicariously through yours. It is sad and depressing in many, many ways."

Olivia laughed.

"Things just aren't happening the way I had planned. Infact they are as far from what I planned as they could possibly be."

"What do you mean?"

"I really need to talk to Elliot."

Casey smiled.

"I thought you didn't want to talk to Elliot."

"I didn't say that I wanted to Casey. I said I needed to. It would be easier all the way around if I didn't have to talk to him or face him every day. But that isn't going to happen. We work together, we see each other every day of our lives. I have to learn to live with that."

"Maybe you shouldn't talk to him until you are sure you're ready."

Casey watched as Olivia pulled her cell phone from the table beside her and called Elliot.

"Hey, it's Liv. I was wondering if maybe we could meet for lunch tomorrow? It has been a while since we have had the chance to actually sit down and talk. And I was just really hoping we could."

Casey watched as tears rose in Olivia's eyes at the sound of his voice. She nodded and a smile slowly spread across her face.

"Thanks, El. I will see you tomorrow."

"What did he say?"

"He said lunch sounded like a great idea. He has something he wants to talk to me about, too."

"What's so urgent?"

Olivia pressed her lips together and took a deep breath as she stared at his name on the cell phone screen.

"Casey, I'm late."

"Late?" she asked feeling a bit confused for just a moment. "Oh! _Late_?" Casey asked as her eyes widened.

"Yes."

"That happens to everyone from time to time."

"It has never happened to me before."

"Maybe it's a sign."

Olivia stared at her friend.

"That you and Elliot should give this one more try. Maybe take that romantic weekend alone and try to work things out."

"You don't understand Casey. This wasn't supposed to happen."

"A lot of married couples have unplanned pregnancies. This is a good thing, Liv."

"No. None of this was supposed to happen. It wasn't real."

"Huh?"

"The marriage…. it was all an act."

"What are you talking about?"

"Elliot was about to lose the kids. The judge said he had to provide a stable two parent home for them or he was going to award custody to Kathy's sister. I couldn't let that happen," she said as her tears began to fall.

"You're saying the marriage wasn't legal?"

"No. By the state of New York, it was legal and binding. But there wasn't a real marriage. It was just for show. None of it was real."

"Apparently the sex was real," she said staring at her dear friend's abdomen and trying to imagine her with a big baby belly.

"Casey," Olivia said looking up at her friend through tears.

"I'm sorry. Obviously at some point it became real. I helped you pick out lingerie for his birthday. Now you're telling me that the two of you weren't really romantically involved?"

"It was only supposed to be sex. Nothing more. Just a physical connection between two consenting adults."

Casey could see the heartbreak in her eyes.

"You weren't supposed to fall in love?"

"He's gonna hate me," she gasped between sobs. "He's going to think that I did this on purpose. To trap him or something."

"Liv, I couldn't see Elliot ever hating you. Or thinking that you would do something like that."

"This entire time we have been counting down to 'D' day. That was what was supposed to happen. We would stay together for a while to get custody and get the judge off his back. Then we'd file for divorce. One year in and we're out. That was the plan. Then the judge said that we had to remain separated for a while before he would sign the papers and allow the divorce to go through. And now this."

"Didn't you guys use something?"

"Yes, we used condoms at first and then I got on the pill."

"Are you sure you didn't miss one?"

"I take it religiously. Every night before I go to bed."

"You're still taking it?"

"Well, I didn't really see a reason not to until today."

"But you haven't taken a test?"

"No. I know it sounds silly, but I'm kind of afraid to."

"See? This could still turn out to be nothing. Maybe you just need to be put on a different pill. You won't know for sure until you take a test. Do you want me to run out and get one? I can sit here with you while you do it if you'd like, so you don't have to be alone."

"I got one already. I have just been trying to get up the nerve to take it."

Casey reached out to hold Olivia's hands in hers.

"You know that Elliot is your best friend and I don't think he would let something like this put an end to that. You mean too much to him. He loves you. Maybe it was all supposed to be for show, but I have seen the way he looks at you and it seems pretty real to me. I don't think you would be sitting here tonight all depressed and crying if you weren't really in love with him."

"I miss him, Casey. I miss my husband."

"And your lover?"

Olivia smiled through her tears.

"But more than anything, I miss my friend. Things haven't been the same. I don't know if we can ever really be the same after this. No matter how it turns out."

Casey leaned forward and hugged her friend tight.

"I wish I knew how to make it better for you."

"Having you here with me makes it a little better."

Olivia barely slept that night. The next afternoon she met up with Elliot at one of their favorite restaurants for lunch.

"Hey you," he said giving her an awkward side hug as she approached the table and it was obvious this was strange for him, too.

"Hey."

"You didn't come to work this morning."

"No, I just kind of needed a little break today. I didn't feel like facing Cragen and that four foot stack of paperwork on my desk."

"So you played hooky and took a long weekend," Elliot laughed.

"Something like that."

"How have you been?"

Horrible, miserable, lonely, she thought as a million words ran screaming through her head. But the one word answer she gave was not one of them.

"Fine. How are you?" she asked watching his body language for any sign that he had been as screwed up about this as she had.

"Alright."

Normally, Olivia had no trouble reading him. But today, something about the way he acted seemed…. different. Not necessarily good or bad, just different.

"So I wanted to…."

"I asked you here because….."

They started at the same time. Olivia smiled in a sort of shy embarrassment.

"There is something I really think we should talk about," she continued.

Elliot smiled.

"I have some news as well."

"You go first," she encouraged trying to buy herself a little more time.

"I have something for you," he said laying a folder on the table in front of her.

Olivia opened it and stared at the paperwork inside.

"Is this for real?" she asked looking back up at him as she felt tears rising in her eyes once more.

"It is. I spoke to the judge this morning. We had already signed everything and as of nine o'clock this morning when he autographed these, you my dear are a free woman."

Olivia felt a knot in her throat and could barely breathe.

"I thought you would be a little more excited about this. You seemed so disappointed when 'D' day didn't go as planned. Now that it is all over, you can put this all behind you and get back to your own life."

"Yeah," she almost whimpered as tears began to stream down her cheeks.

"Liv, what's wrong?"

"Nothing," she said softly as she shook her head. "Just bad timing, I guess."

"Did you say you had something you wanted to talk about as well?"

She drew a deep breath and nodded.

"Go ahead," he encouraged her.

"This couldn't have come at a worse time."

Elliot waited for a few moments as she tried to think of a way to break it to him gently.

"Well, go ahead."

"Elliot, I'm late."

He stared at her for a moment and she waited to see if he understood what she meant.

"Late on what?"

"My period. It's late."

He stared at the table for a few minutes in a painful silence, before he looked back up at her.

"But it doesn't necessarily mean that you're….. what are you a couple of days late?"

"A couple of….weeks," she said softly as he stared at her.

"Weeks? How many?"

Olivia pressed her lips together as she began to cry once more.

"Two and a half."

"Two and a half weeks isn't that late. It could just be stress."

"Months," she corrected him. "almost eleven weeks."

Watching the look on his face she suddenly felt nauseated.

"Eleven weeks is a pretty long time. Are you sure?"

"I'm pretty sure."

"Liv, why didn't you say something?"

"I knew I was a little late, but I just figured it was stress. Or the new birth control. It wasn't until I started noticing _other_ things that I thought it might actually be something else."

"What other things?"

"Insomnia, fatigue, nausea. Elliot, I swear to you, I didn't mean for this to happen."

"I know that. But it could still just be some crazy side effect of your pill or something. You should make an appointment to be sure."

"That's what I did this morning."

"You are really pregnant?" he said staring into her eyes.

"It came out positive all three times, with a 99% accuracy. He did an early exam and estimated me to be around eleven weeks."

"Hell of a day, huh? We get divorced and find out we're going to be parents all in the same day."

"I don't know what to say," she said softly.

"I'm sorry," he said wiping a tear from her cheek. "I don't mean to seem so cold and emotionless. It's just kind of a shock."

"I know."

"We used condoms."

"We did."

"And you were on the pill."

"It is 99.9% effective in preventing pregnancy."

"I guess we are that lucky one tenth of a percent."

Olivia watched him nervously as Elliot took her hand in his and slowly began to smile.

"You think an unplanned pregnancy is lucky."

"Unexpected maybe, but not unplanned. I think this was God's plan all along."

Olivia laughed in relief and smiled.

"Really?"

"He doesn't make mistakes, Olivia."

She smiled and focused on their folded together on the table.

"You're right."

"I want you to know that I will support you 100% in whatever choice you decide is best for you. But I think you know what I prefer."

She took a deep breath and exhaled.

"You know in all of the millions of thoughts that have run through my mind since I first thought I could be pregnant, this one right here hasn't even crossed it. I guess I just always knew what I would do. I don't believe in abortion. And I don't see the point in giving our baby away when it has two parents right here who will love him or her unconditionally, no matter what."

"So we're keeping the baby?"

"There are a lot of details that we need to work out, but it appears so. Yes."

Elliot laughed nervously.

"We're having a baby. We're having a baby," he repeated as it began to sink in.

Without thinking, he leaned across the table and kissed her tenderly.

"_We_ are having a baby," she said as the reality of the situation hit her for the first time.

"How are we going to explain this to the kids?" Elliot asked with a nervous smile.


	20. 20 Ulterior Motives

_Playing House_

_(Chapter Twenty: Ulterior Motives)_

Elliot stood in the kitchen with the sleeves of his dress shirt rolled up chopping vegetables for the salad. On the grill outside were his famous steaks and the girls had already set the table.

"You are really excited about Liv coming for dinner tonight, aren't you dad?" Maureen asked from behind him.

"It will be nice to see her, yes. Did you get the wine I asked you to pick up?"

"It's right here," she said setting it on the counter and pulling wine glasses from the cabinet. "You miss her, don't you?"

Elliot lowered his chopping knife and looked at his oldest child.

"We are still very good friends. And I think it is important that we all do our part to show Olivia that even though we don't live together anymore, she is still a big part of this family."

Maureen smiled.

"I know that. But I also think you are just excited to be seeing her again."

"Why would you say that?"

"Dad, you have been running around here with this big grin on your face and humming while you cook. You don't normally serenade the produce and you never ask me to buy wine for dinner."

"It is Olivia's favorite wine. She had it at dinner all of the time when she lived here."

"And you're wearing the blue button up shirt."

"You don't like the shirt?"

"It's nice dad. But you never wear your dressy shirts on Saturday. Especially to cook dinner. And I happen to know that is the shirt Olivia bought you for your birthday. She said it brings out your eyes. You are up to something, aren't you?"

"Like I said, I want her to feel welcome."

"Even though you aren't married anymore?"

Elliot paused for a moment and stared at her for.

"Where did you hear that?"

"So it's true?"

"The divorce became final a few days ago." He watched as a look of sadness crossed her face. "Why don't you pour us a glass of that wine?"

Maureen nodded and began to fill two glasses.

"I saw the papers. You left them on the table this morning."

Elliot looked back at her as he picked up his glass.

"I picked them up before the other kids could see. I guess I was just hoping that you guys would change your minds and she's move back in. We liked her here. Everyone was so happy. You and Liv seemed happy."

"Baby, look at me. There are a lot of reasons that adults do things. Sometimes reasons you can't understand because you may not know the entire truth."

"I know you don't tell us everything because you are trying to protect us. But I'm an adult, dad. I think I can handle the truth."

He looked around the room for any signs of the other children.

"You're right. And I will tell you everything. But I don't want it to get out to your brothers and sisters. I really don't think they are mature enough to understand."

"I wont say anything."

"Olivia and I didn't share a typical marriage."

Maureen looked confused.

"It hurt me bad when I lost your mother. It hurt us all. I didn't know if I would ever get married again. I hadn't really even thought about dating. Then things happened with your aunt Kate. She and your grandma were worried that because I was so sad that mom died, I wasn't taking good enough care of you kids."

"That was so stupid. They should have just butt out!"

"Maybe so, but they did what they did because they love you guys, too. They wanted to make sure that you were all very well taken care of."

"We always have been."

"And you always will be, honey. But when I went to court, that judge told me that unless I were to remarry and provide a second parent for you kids…..I was going to lose you."

He watched as Maureen's bottom lip quivered and she realized the seriousness of the situation.

"Olivia and I decided to get married so that the judge would let me keep you guys. We got the new house and did everything he asked so we could bring you guys home. But the marriage part was just pretend."

"So you guys don't really love each other?"

"Of course we love each other, we are best friends. We just don't love each other the way a man is supposed to love his wife. We were only supposed to be together for six months or so, to make it look real. But it ended up being a lot longer than that."

"But you were never really in love with each other?"

"Honey, it just wasn't like that."

"Dad, you slept in the same bed. You went on a honeymoon!"

"The honeymoon was more like a slumber party," he said with a smile. " We stayed up late eating junk food and watching old black and white movies on television. And a man and a woman can sleep in the same bed without anything happening."

"Sex, you mean? So the two of you never had sex?"

Elliot took a deep breath, suddenly he was becoming uncomfortable with the idea of having this conversation with his child.

"After a little while Liv and I kind of started dating each other."

"So there was sex?"

"Eventually, for a little while, yes. But that isn't the case now. We are just good friends."

"Oh," she said sensing he was ready for the conversation to be over. "It's a shame you couldn't work it out. Everyone thought you guys made a really good couple," she said pulling the large salad bowl from the counter and sitting it on the table.

"I'm gonna go check on the steaks," Elliot said trying to remove himself from the uncomfortable situation he had just put himself into.

"Dad?"

"Yeah?" he asked turning to face her.

"Did you love her? I mean, like you loved mom. Did you ever love Olivia that way?"

"Sometimes I think I did. But it's over, honey."

"But isn't it possible? If you really loved someone in the past, I mean, for you to love her again? Do you think you could ever love her like that again?"

"Maureen, I think maybe your mom was the great love of my life."

"You said when mom died you would never love like that again."

"I know what I said."

"But you did, you were in love with Olivia like that for a while, too."

Elliot stared at her trying to see where she was going with this.

"So if there is supposed to be only one great love out there for everyone, don't you think this might be some kind of omen or something?"

Now he was lost.

"What are you talking about?"

"You've had two. Mom was the first great love of your life and you never thought you could love like that again. But then you loved Olivia. You are pretty lucky to find two people to love like that, dad. Mom was taken away from you. But Olivia is still here. I think that if you truly love someone, signing a piece a paper can't make you stop loving them. You say it is over dad, but it isn't. It can't be because she is still here. But she won't be forever. If you don't tell her how you really feel about her, she's gonna leave and you will lose her forever."

"Maureen, we are divorced."

"So what dad! You were never really married!"

"What are you saying?"

"I am saying, that if you love Olivia….if you really love her like the rest of us do…..you should fight for her. Don't let her get away without at least telling her how you really feel. Mom may have been the first great love of your life, dad, but I think Olivia is your soul mate. And I am pretty sure, that if you don't speak up before it is too late and you lose her to another man….you are going to regret it forever. The marriage may not have been real dad, but if the love was real then you have something to hold onto. If the love is real, it doesn't take much to make the marriage real as well," she replied brushing past him and taking the plate from his hand to pull the steaks from the fire.

Elliot exhaled and took another drink from his wine glass. He knew she was right. When exactly had his child become his voice of reason? He stood and brushed off his cornflower blue shirt as the door bell rang. He was going to have to step up and tell Olivia that he was still in love with her or he could lose her forever. But that was a matter for another night.

"Hey," he said with a smile as he opened the front door. "You don't have to ring the bell, you know. You can just come in."

Olivia smiled.

"I don't live here anymore."

"But you're welcome just the same."

"Thanks, El. How are the kids?"

"Excited that you're coming for dinner. They miss you. I miss you."

She smiled.

"I miss you guys, too."

"I should probably tell you that….um….Maureen already knows about the divorce."

"You told her? How did she take it?"

"She saw the papers. She's disappointed. She said she hoped that we would have worked things out between us. I explained everything to her."

"Everything?"

"Pretty much. I may have left out one tiny little detail," he said looking down at her abdomen.

Olivia laughed.

"You brought flowers?" Elliot asked looking at the mixed bouquet she held in her hands.

"I walked past the flower market and I couldn't resist. They all smelled so good. I thought they would look pretty in the center of the table."

"I think you are right. I'm gonna get a vase and put these in some water. Dinner is ready. I had Maureen pick up a bottle of your favorite red wine. I know under the circumstances you can't really drink much, but most doctors say that a glass of wine with dinner is fine."

Olivia smiled.

"You have really thought this through. I am still kind of handling the shock of seeing that stick turn blue. I don't think it has fully sunk in yet. How do you think the kids will take it?"

"Are you kidding me? They'll be excited."

"All of them?" she asked with a worried look.

"I think so. And I am sure they will spend a little time trying to convince us that we should get back together. Or try to work it out."

Elliot watched her for a reaction.

"But you can't work out something that is already over. I think those divorce papers sealed that deal."

"I guess you're right. Your life may not be completely back to normal, but at least it's yours again. We do need to think up some sort of plan though. I want us to raise this baby together. Even if we don't live under the same roof."

Olivia took a deep breath and exhaled.

"We will work something out. You are a wonderful father and I want to make sure that this baby has you and all of the kids in its life. But first step is first."

"Time to face the executioners," Elliot joked as he slipped his hand over hers. "Are you sure you're ready for this?"

Olivia smiled.

"I'm ready if you are."

"Dinner!" Elliot yelled down the basement steps for the third time.

"She's probably listening to her ipod dad," Elizabeth suggested dropping a large scoop of Maureen's homemade mashed potatoes onto her plate.

"Yeah, that this is like permanently attached to her head," Dickie remarked opening his Coke and taking a sip.

"I'll go get her," Elliot said standing.

"Let me," Olivia said with a smile as she laid her napkin on the table.

Olivia walked quietly down the basement stairs. She stood in the doorway and smiled as she watched Kathleen. The girl was stretched out across her bed with her earphones on and appeared to be studying.

Olivia walked a little closer and laid across the bed beside Kathleen.

"Oh my gosh, Liv!" Kathleen squealed as she slid her earphones down and threw her arms around Olivia's neck.

"Hey, sweetheart."

"I missed you so much."

"I just had lunch with you last week," Olivia replied brushing her finger over the tip of Kathleen's nose.

"I know. But things kind of suck around here since you moved out. I miss you. We all miss you. Dad misses you too, you know?"

"And I miss you guys. But I think that this is just the way things have to be right now."

"Do you think you and dad will ever get back together?"

"Things between your father and I are…."

"Complicated?"

"Exactly."

"That's what he says, too."

"I'm sorry that I don't have better answers for you."

Kathleen smiled.

"I really miss you when you're not here. I don't have anyone to talk to."

"You can talk to me anytime."

"And I do. I call you and text you and we have lunch and coffee. I'm surprised I haven't driven you crazy."

"Hanging out with one of my closest friends doesn't drive me crazy. What are you working on here?" Olivia asked looking over Kathleen's shoulder at the book on the bed.

"Spanish homework. I have a big test on Monday and I don't want to bomb it."

Olivia smiled.

"If you need any help, I used to be pretty good at this stuff."

"Actually, I could use your help. I've got this, but I have to write this essay….thing."

"An essay?"

"More of a short story. It's for a scholarship. My English teacher said that I should submit something. The scholarship is for creative writing and she said that she thinks I could have a pretty good shot at it. It's for a thousand dollars. I have already written most of it. I was kind of hoping maybe when I am finished you could take a look at it and tell me what you think?"

"I would love to. I am so proud of you. You have really turned your grades around and now you are applying for colleges. You, my dear, have a very bright future ahead of you."

Kathleen smiled.

"Do you really think so?"

"I know so. The possibilities are endless."

"Liv, I really want to go to college," she said softly. "I wasn't sure about it before. But now, I know that I really want to make something for myself."

"And you will. Any ideas what you want to major in?"

"I don't really know. But I do know that I want a college degree. I don't want work in a pizza joint for the rest of my life."

"Your dad and the kids are waiting for us upstairs for dinner. Well, I'm sure they're not really waiting, but they are expecting us."

Kathleen smiled and closed her book as Olivia helped her up from the bed.

"So, what is this story about?" Olivia asked as they started up the stairs.

"A female NYPD detective," Kathleen said with a smile.

"Anyone I know?" Olivia laughed with a smile.

At dinner Olivia talked with the kids about the things that were going on in their lives. If this evening hadn't had ulterior motives, it would have been the perfect family dinner.

Elliot cleared his throat as Olivia picked up her glass of wine and she knew it was time.

"Guys, Liv and I wanted to talk to you guys about something important."

The kids all stopped talking and looked at their father.

"What is it, daddy?" Elizabeth asked.

"Do you guys remember when we told you that Olivia was moving out and we were going to get divorced?"

"Did you change your mind?" Dickie asked.

"Not exactly. We wanted to have a family dinner tonight to tell you guys that as of a couple of days ago, Olivia and I are officially divorced."

Olivia watched as tears came to Kathleen's eyes and the other kids looked disappointed.

"I thought you were going to try and work it out?" Kathleen asked.

Liv and I agreed that this was the best thing for us.

"But you still love each other, right?" she asked through tears.

Elliot reached over and laid his hand over Olivia's.

"We will always love each other," he said as he stared into her big brown eyes. "Some people just aren't meant to be married, that's all."

"That's crap dad! If you two think that you are not meant to be together, then you must both be blind! You guys are so good together. You're good parents and we had a good family. You guys saved our family. Now you're just gonna rip it apart?"

"Kathleen, it's done. It's over now and there is no sense in getting all worked up over it. Things are going to stay exactly the way they have been the last few weeks. Liv is always going to be an important part of our lives. Just because we are not married anymore doesn't mean that you guys can't still love her. She and I will always be here for all of you and for this family. We don't have to me married to make us a family."

"I liked it better when you were," she said softly.

"Yeah daddy," Elizabeth agreed.

"Me too," Dickie noted.

Olivia took a deep breath.

"Guys, your dad is right. Me not living here and us no longer being married does not mean for one second that I don't love you anymore. You guys are my kids and I love you like you were my own. I am always going to be here for you, no matter what. We are still the Stabler family. I just happen to live at a different address. But I will still go to church with you and go to your ball games. We will still have family dinners and I will be here for every single birthday party."

"You promise?" Elizabeth whined.

"Cross my heart. Just because your father and I have decided not to be married anymore, it doesn't mean that I won't still be here when you guys need me. All you have to do is pick up that phone and I will be right here beside you. We're a family. And families are always there for each other. No matter what. Right?" she asked looking toward Maureen for support.

"Right," Maureen agreed.

"Right?" Olivia asked Kathleen.

"Right," she said softly.

"Guys, I know I am not really your mother…."

"But you are one of our mothers," Dickie interrupted.

"After mommy died….you loved us and took good care of us….and we love you….that makes you our mother," Elizabeth piped up.

"And we're proud to be your kids," Dickie said.

"Yeah," Kathleen agreed.

"You saved our family Olivia," Maureen said. "That judge wanted to split us up and take us away from dad. Then you came along and everything got better."

"I stopped getting in trouble at school," Dickie said.

"I stopped skipping school," Kathleen said. "I'm trying hard to stay out of trouble. You helped me with my homework and now I am making good grades and even applying for college. I never would have done any of that if it hadn't been for you."

"And you go to my Girl Scout meetings with me," Elizabeth said.

"You helped me decorate my apartment," Maureen added. "And you do all of the voices when you read Eli his bedtime stories."

"Yeah, and you don't skip over parts like dad does," Elizabeth added.

"All of these things are what makes you a great mother Liv," Dickie said. "You are our mother and we miss you so much when you are not here with us."

Olivia was crying now.

"I know you do guys and I miss you, too. But this is the way things have to be. None of the other things have to change, though. There will still be stories and help with homework….and even Girl Scout meetings. Sometimes you guys can even come into the city and spend the night with me. Me moving out doesn't mean that I am going to stop loving you. I will always love you guys."

"And we will always love you," Maureen said forcing a smile.

Olivia drew a deep breath and wiped the tears from her cheeks. She tried her best to compose herself as silence fell over the room.

"Do you guys really think that I make a good mother?" she asked watching the children for their reactions.

"The best," Kathleen said with a smile.

"That means a lot to me. And I am glad you think so, because I…." she paused for a moment and looked over at Elliot as he took her hand…. "_we_ are going to have a baby."

"What?" they all seemed to say at the same time.

"You're pregnant?" Maureen asked unable to believe her father hadn't mentioned this little fact in their earlier conversation.

"I am," Olivia confirmed. "And you dad and I have decided that even though we are no longer married, we want to raise this baby together as a family. One big family. And you guys are going to be the best big brothers and sisters. And you will see me and the baby all of the time, you'll see."

"So you're pregnant, but you're still not moving back in?" Kathleen asked.

"No. I am not moving back in. We have not worked out all of the details just yet, we haven't known for very long."

"But there will probably be a crib here and one at Liv's place," Elliot jumped in. "And sometimes Liv and the baby might stay here. Other times they will stay at her apartment. We will have to see what works out best as we go along."

"This is crazy," Kathleen said laying her napkin down on the table beside her plate, "you get her pregnant then you file for divorce?"

"Kathleen!" Elliot scolded.

"We didn't find out about the baby until after the divorced was finalized. The divorce had nothing to do with the pregnancy."

"So this poor little baby is just another innocent victim of this divorce," she said.

Elliot glared at her.

"I'm sorry for being rude. That is just how I feel. You guys didn't ask us about getting married, you didn't ask us about getting divorced. Why should you care how we feel about you having a baby?" she asked wiping tears from her eyes.

"That's enough," Elliot said staring her down.

"Elliot, it's okay. I want to know how she feels about this. I want to know how you all feel about this," Olivia said looking at the faces around the dinner table.

"I'm happy about the baby," Kathleen said softly. "I just can't help but feel bad because this baby will never know how good things were when you were married. I think being shuffled back and forth is only going to be confusing and kids shouldn't have to take turns seeing their parents. They should get to see their mother and their father anytime they want to. Every day. And have a real home. Not just a couple of houses they alternate between depending on the day of the week. The baby is good news. It is the situation that sucks!"

"Anyone else?" Olivia asked.

"I agree with Kathleen," Dickie said. "This situation does kind of suck! But I think it's cool you are going to have a baby."

"Yeah," Elizabeth agreed. "I hope it's a girl."

"Or a boy," Maureen said with a smile.

Olivia closed her eyes and smiled. More than any of this she had worried that the kids wouldn't take well to the new addition to the family. As they sat there discussing the topic as a family, the mood began to lighten. Before long the kids were discussing names for their new baby brother or sister.


	21. 21 Extended Family

_**YAY, IT'S FIXED! I HAVE BEEN TRYING TO POST THIS UPDATE SINCE FRIDAY! (BUT THE SITE WOULDN'T LET ME.) I HAVE A FEW OTHER UPDATES IN THE WORKS (FOR OTHER STORIES) AND WILL TRY TO GET THEM OUT SOON. I WAS TRYING TO GET AT LEAST ONE MORE FINISHED, BUT IT HAS BEEN A VERY BUSY WEEKEND (AND MONDAY.) ANYWAY, HOPE YOU GUYS ENJOY IT! **_

_**~ Detective Olivia Stabler ~**_

_Playing House_

_(Chapter Twenty Two: Extended Family)_

_**NINE WEEKS LATER…**_

Olivia sighed as she stared at her reflection in the mirror as she buttoned her blouse. The small bulge of her pregnant belly seemed to grow larger every day and there was hardly anything in her closet that could conceal it.

"Knock, knock," Elliot called from the front of the apartment.

"I'm back here!"

"You are still getting ready? We're gonna be late, Liv," he said as he leaned against the door frame to watch her. "How are the two of you doing on this beautiful morning?"

Olivia smiled as she shrugged her shoulders and pulled a sweat shirt down over her belly.

"We're good. I think I am finally getting past the morning sickness."

"That is always good."

"Yeah, now I just have the heart burn, insomnia, bursting into tears at any given moment and the fact that nothing in my closet conceals my baby bump anymore."

"Well, it is probably a good thing that all of our friends and co-workers already know then."

"You are probably right," she said with a smile. "We should get to see the baby today. They are gonna do another ultrasound."

"Do you think we'll be able to tell the sex?" Elliot asked as he stretched out across her bed.

"They are going to try. Sometimes they can tell at twenty weeks. Sometimes it takes a little longer."

"Am I the only one excited to find out if we are having a son or a daughter?"

"I'm excited. About the baby, I mean," she said smoothing her hands over her belly. "I'm just not completely sure if I want to know the sex."

"Really?"

"Yeah. I mean it could be kind of exciting to wait until that moment in the delivery room when the doctor holds the baby up and says it's a boy or it's a girl."

"It is exciting. But it is still exciting if you know."

Olivia sat down on the edge of the bed beside him as she moved a brush through her hair.

"So you and Kathy chose to find out with the kids?"

"With Maureen, they could really only guess. The technology wasn't as good as it is now and it wasn't as dependable. She was a boy until the moment she was born."

Olivia laughed.

"And the others?"

"Kathleen was the first one we knew for sure."

"And you still didn't get your boy."

"No. But Maureen got the baby sister she wanted. With the twins we found out early on that there were two. And we could tell they were fraternal. We knew there was a girl for sure, but they couldn't really see well enough to predict the sex of the second baby."

"So Dickie was a surprise."

"A big surprise. Kathy had to have a cesarean and we waited as the doctor delivered the first baby. We were expecting a little girl. Instead, we got a big boy."

"He was a big baby?"

"Dickie was delivered three and a half minutes before Elizabeth. He weighed just over six pounds and she a little over five. They were healthy and beautiful and they both screamed like crazy."

"Five and six pounds, that is really good for twins."

"Yeah, well, they didn't want to come out. The doctor had to go in and get them."

"And Eli? You knew he was a boy, right?"

"Yeah. We actually found out pretty early with him. Kathy was so excited to be having another little boy."

"It really is a shame she didn't get to know him. He is such a wonderful little boy. You have done a really great job with him, with them all, she would have been proud."

"No, Liv. We have done a great job. I never could have done this without you."

Olivia smiled as she placed her hands against her shirt and smoothed it over her belly. "And I couldn't have done this without you," she said softly.

Elliot smiled as he stared lovingly into her eyes. Olivia smiled back at him, then turned shyly away.

"I guess we do make a pretty good team."

"Yes, we do," she agreed.

"Now we'd really better get going or we're gonna be late."

"Just give me a second," she said with a smile. "I have to pee."

"I was thinking after the appointment we could go out for lunch, maybe do a little shopping for the baby," Elliot said. "If you don't have other plans….."

"I don't have any other plans," Olivia replied as she lowered her sunglasses to block the glare. "I took the day off, but don't you have to go back to work?"

"I have my phone if Cragen needs me. This is more important."

"You know, you could find out the sex of the baby if you want. And just don't tell me."

"I don't think I could keep a secret from you for that long. Especially a secret this big. If you want to wait, we can wait."

Olivia laughed.

"Alright," she agreed. "You can help me pick out a crib and bedding. Gender neutral, bedding."

Elliot pulled into a parking space and put the car into park. He was attempting to play it cool, but deep inside he was excited as a child just waking up on Christmas morning about the chance to see their baby. He walked around the car and opened the door for Olivia.

Inside they sat for a few moments while Olivia filled out some paperwork. Once a nurse had shown them back to the little examine room, Olivia changed into a paper gown and settled onto the table.

Elliot stood nervously beside her as the doctor helped Olivia raise place her feet in the stirrups.

"Are you okay?" she asked noticing Elliot was holding his breath.

"Fine. Just, this part makes me a little nervous."

Olivia rolled her head around to look up at him.

"You can wait outside if you want to. I'll be alright. Then you can come back in when we start the ultrasound."

Elliot bit his bottom lip as she offered him her hand.

"It isn't so bad," she assured him. "You don't have to be nervous."

He smiled at her attempt to soothe him with her maternal voice.

"No, I'll stay. I want to be here for you, with you. All the way."

Elliot locked his fingers between hers. He watched as she stared at the ceiling while the doctor examined her.

"Any cramping or bleeding?" the woman asked.

"No," Olivia answered as the doctor helped her to slide back on the table once more.

"How are you doing with the nausea?"

"Much better."

"I see you are finally starting to gain some weight."

"Six pounds," Olivia said proudly. "Well, six that I have been able to keep on since the morning sickness has calmed down. I am actually starting to get a noticeable belly," she said with a smile.

"Impressive," the doctor said with a smile as she pulled a sheet over Olivia's lower half and raised the gown to expose her baby bump. "Are we ready to take a look at this little guy or gal?"

"Wait," Olivia said looking back at Elliot, "our kids met us here and they're out in the waiting area. Do you think they could come in and watch? I think they would really like to see the baby."

The doctor smiled as Olivia.

"I don't normally allow more than one or two people back here during an ultrasound. But I think I could make an exception this one time. As long as we keep it quiet and no other patients are disturbed."

"They won't be, I promise. El, go get the kids."

"Are you sure? I mean, this is kind of a private moment," he said pointing to her sheet.

"I'm sure," she laughed. "This should be a family moment. This will be the first really good look we get at the baby. I think the kids should be a part of this. If they want to be."

"Of course they'll want to be a part of this," he said leaning forward to kiss her forehead. "I'll be right back."

"We'll wait for you," she promised.

Elliot returned a few moments later with the five older children. The stood quietly and watched as the doctor moved the wand around on Olivia's belly to find the baby inside.

"Wow," Elizabeth said as the loud whomp whomp sound of the infant's heartbeat filled the room. "The baby is so little."

"The baby is nine inches long from head to toe and weighs about nine ounces."

"Aww, she's sucking her thumb," Maureen pointed out as she leaned closer to show little Eli.

"It could still be a boy!" Dickie insisted. "Right dad?"

"It could be," Elliot agreed.

"How long until you can tell for sure?" Elizabeth asked.

"Actually, the baby is being very cooperative today," the doctor informed them. "I can tell you the sex right now, if you are interested."

The kids began to grow louder in excitement.

"Hold on guys," Elliot injected, "Liv and I have decided that we don't want to find out the sex of the baby."

"Why not dad?" Kathleen asked. "It might be easier to shop for baby stuff if you know for sure."

"I think it would be cool to wait and let it be a surprise," Maureen said with a smile.

"Why don't we take a vote?" Olivia suggested.

"Vote? I thought you had already made up your mind?"

"I kind of did. But this isn't just my baby. This baby belongs to all of us, so I think we should all get to decide. I personally would like to wait. But I am willing to find out if that is what you guys want."

"I agree with Olivia," Maureen said. "I think it would be nice to wait."

"I would rather find out," Kathleen said.

"Me too," Dickie agreed.

"Elizabeth, sweetheart? What about you?" Olivia asked.

"I really want to know if I have a baby sister in there."

"What about you, dad?" Maureen asked.

"Your father has wanted to know since the day I told him I was pregnant," Olivia said with a smile. "That settles it," she said smoothing her hands over her belly hoping to feel some kind of movement. "We would like to know the sex of this baby," Olivia said with a smile.

"Well," the doctor began, "I am very proud to say that you do infact have a baby sister in there," she replied smiling at Elizabeth.

"Yes!" she squealed.

"It's a little girl?" Elliot asked.

"A very healthy little girl," the doctor added.

Olivia watched as a proud smiled crossed Elliot's face.


	22. 22 Too Close To Home

_Playing House_

_(Chapter Twenty Two: Too Close To Home)_

Elliot paced the floor in front of Cragen's office door waiting for him to hang up the phone. He watched as his boss hung up the receiver and motioned for him to enter the office.

"You wanted to see me?" Elliot said holding up a small note that had been left in hit message box.

"Come in and have a seat."

"Should I get Olivia? This was her case, too."

"Not just yet. I think in her present condition, it might be best to keep this just between us for the moment. At least until we are completely sure what the danger is."

"But she is just out there in the open. You have to tell her. If you won't, I will."

"I will tell her. I just don't want to scare her or cause any unnecessary stress on her right now. But I am not leaving her out in the open either. I have assigned a detail to follow her until further notice. There will be a uniformed officer shadowing Olivia and another assigned to the apartment."

"You're playing with fire," Elliot warned. "You know this is only going to piss her off."

"She might be pissed, but she'll be safe. This man threatened you both in open court."

"And you think now that he has escaped he is coming for Olivia and I?"

"He has had three years to sit in that cell and plot his revenge. I don't want to take any chances. I have men available for the kids' schools and your house as well. There isn't any chance you could talk Olivia into coming back to stay at the house until all of this passes over, is there?"

Elliot laughed.

"I have been trying to talk her into coming back since the day I found out she was pregnant with my child. She's stubborn and she just wants a little space right now. I'm trying to respect that. Things are strange between us, right now."

"I need you working on this, right now. I cannot completely bench Olivia or she is going to know something is up. I'll keep her around here as much as possible, but you know Olivia. She wont give up the court appearances and light work she has been doing. I honestly wouldn't be surprised if she worked up until the day this baby is born. I was thinking of putting her with Fin until this all blows over. I know Fin would do anything to protect her. Any of us would, but Fin has a real connection with Olivia. I will make sure he doesn't let her out of his sight."

"She still really needs to know what is going on."

"She is going to want details. She is going to have questions. Questions that I just don't have answers for right now."

"But the media is going to get a hold of this, she should find out from one of her own. Not on television or the radio like everyone else."

Cragen stared out the office window into the bullpen. He watched as Olivia sat working at her desk.

"My first concern here is Olivia and that baby."

"Mine, too," Elliot reminded him.

"We have to take this seriously. This man held her captive for three days."

"It was a long time ago."

"I know it was. And I know she says nothing happened. But something like this could trigger all kinds of mixed emotions and memories she has blocked out. She really shouldn't be left alone right now."

"I want to tell her. I understand what you are trying to say, but I really think she needs to know. She needs to understand the severity of this situation. And I think she should hear it from me."

"It's your call. You know her better than any of us do. But I don't think that Olivia is the only one who needs to understand the severity of the situation. Keep in mind that you were the original target. He took her to get to you."

"And the moment he finds out she is pregnant with my baby, he will go after her again."

"Or one of the other kids."

"I should pull them out of school. He could be after them as we speak."

"Calm down and take a moment to think about this. I have already got officers watching each of them. School doesn't let out for a few hours, that should give you a little time to think about how you want to handle this."

"This is just a lot to take in all at once," Elliot said looking out at Olivia as she raised her head to look at him. "I can't keep it from her. I wont. I want to take a couple of hours, I'll take her out to lunch and try to break it to her easy. Together, we will decide how we want to deal with this. Do they have any idea where this guy is?"

"No clue. He escaped sometime last night between bed checks. He has dropped off the map. He could be anywhere."

Elliot exhaled as he scratched his fingers over his scalp.

"First things first," he replied opening the office door.

Elliot walked across the bullpen and picked up his suit jacket from the back of his chair.

"Is everything alright?" Olivia asked sensing something was wrong. "It appeared to be getting pretty heated in there."

"It's alright. Listen," he said leaning across her desk to whisper to her, "there is something that I really need to talk to you about. I have already spoken to Cragen and I thought we could take a long lunch."

"He is trying to stick me behind the desk already, isn't he? I told him I was fine. I mean, I have had a couple of cramps, but even the doctor said it was nothing and…."

"Liv, it's not that. Lets just get out of here for a little while, okay? You and me in some quiet place where we can talk for a little while."

"Where do you want to go?"

"Anywhere you want. Or we could pick up some take out and head back to your apartment. You can kick off your shoes and relax a little."

"What are you up to?"

"Like I said, we just really need to talk. And the apartment would give us a little privacy."

"Alright," she agreed.

Half an hour later Elliot handed her a container full of take out food as she settled into the sofa and propped her feet on the coffee table.

"So what is this very important thing we need to talk about?"

"Richard Parker," Elliot said watching her for a reaction.

Olivia pressed her lips together as she placed her palm against her baby belly, still refusing to look at him.

"Is he up for parole or something?" she asked softly. "I really don't think I could handle testifying against him again right now."

"It's worse, Liv. He's out."

"Out?" she asked with her eyes meeting his in a worried stare.

"He escaped last night. I wanted to be the one to tell you."

"You think he is coming for me?"

"Cragen thinks he might."

"Do you?"

"We put him away. This man is convinced I am the one who ruined his life. He took you before to get to me. I honestly wouldn't put it past him to try again."

"What about the kids?"

"Cragen has officers at their schools. I will pick them up at the end of the school day and explain this all to them. I think for now it would be better for the kids to keep things on their regular schedule. He also assigned an officer to the house and here," he said looking out the window at the unmarked squad car parked across the street. "Someone will be with you anywhere you go, just in case."

"So much for privacy," she said as she set the take out container on the coffee table in front of her.

"I know you hate this. But it is for your own safety."

"Ordered by you or by Cragen."

"The order came from him, but I completely agree with it. This isn't just about us anymore. It is about what is safest for our family, for this baby. I would really like it if you would consider coming back to stay at the house for a while. At least until they have Parker in custody again."

"Elliot, we have talked about this. I live here. This is my home. You and the kids have the house. If I go back now, even just for a little while, it would be misleading to the kids. They are not going to understand this. If I come back, they are going to think we are getting back together. Or that there is at least a chance. They have been through enough, El. I don't want to take a chance on hurting them again."

"If something bad happens to you or to their baby sister, it is going to hurt them."

Olivia combed her fingers through her hair as she exhaled.

"I just don't think it is a good idea. I will be fine here. I have two guns, pepper spray, a uniform at the door and one on the street. I will be fine. _We_ will be fine."

"I just hate that I am so far away if you need me. I know it drives you crazy, but I worry. You are my family and this is my kid. What kind of father would I be if I didn't worry?"

"You may be further away, but Fin is just across town. He can be here in ten minutes, if I need him to."

"That is about the only thing that makes me feel better about this."

"Trust me, if someone walks into this apartment uninvited, they are getting sprayed in the face with pepper spray and shot in the nuts."

"You don't mess around, do you?"

"Not a kill shot, but it will definitely slow him down."

"Trust me, any man who gets shot in the balls is gonna wish he had died."

Olivia laughed as Elliot's cell phone rang.

"Stabler," he said as he placed his hand on her belly. "I am with Liv right now. Yes, I told her and she is okay with the detail. You have a lead?" Olivia watched as Elliot checked his watch. "It is almost two o'clock. I was going to pick the kids up from school a little early so we could sit them down and talk to them about this. Munch can't do it?"

"El, I can pick the kids up."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah. I'll take the rest of the afternoon off. I can pick them up and sit at the house with them until you get home. There will be officers watching the house the whole time. We'll be fine."

"I'll be there," Elliot replied hanging up the phone. "I really appreciate this."

"It will give me the chance to spend a little time with the kids. I can pick up a few groceries before I go get them and cook dinner. Then we can sit down over some homemade chicken cacciatore and explain this all to the kids."

"That sounds like a plan," Elliot said with a smile.

He leaned forward and kissed Olivia on the forehead.

"Just be careful. Be cautious. If something feels off…."

"It probably is, I know. I do this for a living too, remember? I will call you when we get back to the house. It will be fine."

"I hope you're right," he said staring into her eyes as she stood to walk him to the door. "I just really want to make sure you are all alright," he said smoothing his hands over her belly.

Olivia smiled as she looked up at him.

"Did you feel that?" she asked as her eyes widened.

"Was that a kick?"

"It was," she laughed. "And it was a good one."

Elliot smoothed his fingertips around her cheek and raised her chin to stare into her eyes.

"I just want to protect you," he said softly as he stared at her with concern in his eyes.

"I know you do," she replied stepping forward to hug him.

Elliot closed his eyes as he closed his arms around her. He couldn't help but wonder if Olivia would ever fully understand how much he cared for her.

That evening they sat down for a family dinner as Elliot and Olivia explained the danger this man was to their family. After the children were all asleep, Olivia stood to go.

"I think they took it pretty well."

"It's different. They have never really had to deal with anything like this before. Somehow, I have always managed to keep work away from the kids."

"It will be okay. Things might be a little strange for a while, but I am sure that we can handle this."

"I hope you are right."

"I should get going. It is almost eleven o'clock."

"You sure you don't want to stay?" Elliot asked hoping her answer would be different this time. "You know it would make me feel much better about all of this."

"I don't think so. I'm gonna head home and get some sleep. You should try to do the same."

"Alright. But at least call…."

"When I get home," she said with a smile. "I know. Good night El," she said softly as she kissed his cheek.

"Good night, Liv."

Elliot watched until she was safely in her car and backing out of the driveway. As Olivia's black Honda Accord disappeared down the block, an unmarked police car followed her.

The next day went over well. Things were quiet around work as the announcement of Richard Price's escape from prison hit the news. That evening Fin took Olivia out for a late dinner before dropping her off at home for the evening.

"You sure you don't want me to come up?" he asked as she opened the car door.

"I'm good. There are cops everywhere. This man would have to be a real fool to try to start something here."

"You got your weapon?"

"Always," she said pulling back her jacket so he could see her gun.

"I'll pick you up in the morning."

"I can drive."

"You could. Or you could let me have the satisfaction of giving a friend a lift to work."

"You worry too much."

"Maybe so. But this man is crazy. And the more over protective I am of you, the less likely he is to mess with you."

Olivia laughed.

"Good night, Fin," she said leaning to kiss his cheek.

"You sure you're alright? I could walk you up."

"I'm fine. It's twelve feet to the elevator. I am gonna go in and take a long shower, then head to bed. I will see you in the morning."

"Alright," he said watching her until she had entered the building.

Fin waved to the officer standing guard outside her apartment as he drove away.

Elliot had just tucked Eli into bed when he got the call. He rushed down the hall to let Maureen know he had to go out, but would be back as soon as he could. He checked on the kids one more time before he jumped into the car and sped toward Olivia's apartment.

"What the hell happened?" he shouted as he climbed from his car and made his way to the back of the ambulance where she sat.

"I dropped her off. I wasn't gone ten minutes and I heard the call come across the radio. I turned around and came right back."

"Liv, what happened?" he asked as he inspected the scalp laceration the attacker had left her with.

"The apartment door was open when I got upstairs. The place was trashed. I reached for my phone to call it in and he jumped me from behind."

"You didn't walk her upstairs?" he shouted at Fin.

"Elliot! This wasn't his fault! I told him not to."

"The man jumped you from behind, how did you get this?" he asked touching the spot on her forehead.

"He put his arm around my throat from behind me. I tried to fight him and in the struggle I fell, hitting my head on the corner of the coffee table. He was trying to choke me out."

"But she got a piece of him," another detective said as he approached them. "I have a blood trail. She got in at least one shot."

"During the struggle I shot him in the right foot. I also scratched him and bit his right forearm."

"We want to take her in and get her checked out. Just to make sure," the paramedic said as his partner climbed inside. "You can ride along if you'd like."

Elliot looked at Fin.

"Go man. Munch can oversee things here. I'll grab another uniform and head to the house to keep an eye on the kids."

"Have them all just sit outside. The kids are all asleep and seeing half a dozen police officers is liable to freak them out."

Elliot climbed into the back of the ambulance with Olivia as they headed for the hospital. Nearly four hours later, she was discharged after observation had revealed that both mother and daughter were just fine.

"I had Munch pack a few things from your apartment. He brought the bag to the hospital. I'm gonna take you back to the house and get you into bed," he said laying his hand over hers and squeezing it gently. "That doctor said you should take it easy for the next couple of days, just in case."

"I'm fine. Just a little spooked, that's all."

"Let's get you home," he said with a soft smile.

Back at the house, Elliot escorted Olivia inside. He carried her bag into the bedroom and laid it on the bed. Then he moved into the bathroom. Several minutes later, he returned.

"I have an extra pair of boxers and that old shirt you like to sleep in, in that top drawer," he said as she smiled a tired smile.

Elliot moved to the dresser and pulled the clothes out for her.

"I ran you a warm bath. Not too hot, not too cold. Just the way you like it. It will help you unwind. You can take the bed and I will sleep on the couch."

"Thank you," she said forcing a smile.

"I'm gonna go check on the kids, then why don't I make you some hot tea?"

"That sounds really nice," she agreed nodding softly.

"I am right down the hall if you need me."

Olivia smiled as she made her way into the bathroom. Elliot had lit candles all around the bathroom to make it more relaxing. She slowly took off her clothes and lowered herself into the warmth of the water.

Olivia sighed heavily as she felt her body begin to shake and she broke down and cried. She was fine and their baby girl was alright, but the emotional stress of the situation had just become too much for her to handle.

Twenty minutes later she returned to the bedroom feeling much better. She walked into the kitchen and sat down at the table as Elliot brought her a cup of tea.

"You might need these, too," he said handing her two Tylenol. "It has been long enough since you took the medicine at the hospital that you can take them now."

Olivia smiled as she took the pills from his hand.

"You are always taking care of me."

"I'm your partner. That's my job. Besides, you are my best friend and the mother of my baby and I love you. You might as well get used to it, because I am always going to take care of you. I am always going to be here for you. For you and her, both. Through the good and the bad."

"Yeah," she said softly and he could see tears building up in her eyes.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Elliot asked sitting down beside her as she sipped her tea.

"There is nothing to talk about really. I already told you what happened."

"Is there anything else you'd like to talk about?"

"I'm alright," she sighed. "I guess the stress of all of this is starting to sink in. Things are so crazy."

"You are safe now."

"I know."

"Fin is outside running things. He texted me a few minutes ago asking about you. He has officers making walking the grounds every fifteen minutes. You shot Parker in the foot, he isn't going anywhere fast. They'll catch up to him."

"Yeah," she agreed.

"It's late. You should try to get some rest. I'm gonna go around and check on the kids once more, them I'm headed there myself."

"Can I go with you? To check on the kids, I mean."

"Sure," Elliot replied tucking a strand of hair back into place.

Elliot walked her from room to room, checking on each of the children. He watched as Olivia surveyed each of them, tucking them in and kissing them goodnight. He knew she still loved these children as much as they all loved her.

As they walked back upstairs from Kathleen's basement room, Elliot began to rub Olivia's shoulders. She whimpered softly.

"I'm sorry. I didn't meant to hurt you."

"No, it feels good. I am so tense and knotted up. That feels really good."

"I could give you a back massage."

Olivia raised one eyebrow as she looked at him.

"Completely innocent, I swear. I will behave myself. It might help you sleep."

She laughed.

"Alright."

Elliot followed her to the bedroom where she laid down across the bed on her right side.

"This would work better if I could lay on my stomach, but our daughter is kind of in the way," she joked.

"Have you thought of any names, yet?" he asked as he slowly began to rub her back.

"Honestly, I have not even had the time to think about it. We probably should at least start getting a list together though, huh?"

"Yeah. And the girls were talking about wanting to host a baby shower for you. Maybe after all of this mess blows over."

"That is really sweet," Olivia said as she closed her eyes and moaned softly.

"You weren't kidding when you said you were tense."

She sighed and drew a deep breath.

"I was also thinking that you and I could go pick out baby furniture sometime," Elliot said, but she didn't respond. "Liv?"

"Yeah," she said softly and he could tell she was crying.

"Hey?" Elliot replied as she rolled over to look at him.

"I'm sorry. I am a hormonal nightmare."

"It's alright. Are you sure you don't want to talk about it?"

"That's just it. There really isn't anything to talk about."

"There is always something to talk about," he said wiping away a tear. "Honey, it isn't nothing if it is making you cry. What are you thinking?"

"I was just thinking how bad things could have been tonight."

"Talk to me," he said laying back against the bed as she laid down facing him.

"I don't think I have ever been so scared in my life," she whispered. "The only thing I could think about was the baby. I had to do something to protect her."

"And you did."

"God," she sighed. "Seeing his face again brought up so many memories. Things I had blocked out and was hoping I would never have to think about again."

"Liv, did Parker hurt you?" Elliot asked as she stared into his eyes for a moment. "Before, I mean. When he kept you."

"He just smacked me around, mostly. But something about the idea of raping and murdering a cop really got him off. He told me things."

"What things?"

Elliot raised his arm as Olivia nestled her head in against his chest.

"He told the things he did to all of those other women, when he raped and tortured them before he killed them. Then he told me all of the things he was going to do to me," she whispered and he could feel the warmth of her tears against his chest. "He is sick, Elliot. I watched him do things to those women. And they would scream and beg me for help. And I couldn't help them," she sobbed. "He tied me up and made me watch as he murdered them. And I know that is what he would have done to me if you guys hadn't gotten there when you did."

"Liv," he said kissing the top of her head, "I am so sorry. You never told me any of this before. I knew you well enough to know that something had happened. But I had no idea that it was this bad."

She exhaled and closed her eyes.

"I just tried to forget it. I put it to the back of my mind and it worked for a while. Until I saw his face tonight. He asked me if I missed him and it all came rushing back. Every sick twisted thing he said to me. And every horrible thing I watched him do to those women."

"He isn't going to get you, Olivia. We wont let him. You should close your eyes and try to get some sleep."

"Can you stay?" she whispered looking up at him with fear in her dark eyes.

Elliot smiled.

"As long as you need me to," he replied pulling the blanket up around her as she yawned.

"Thank you, El."

"You're welcome, honey," he whispered as he kissed her forehead and closed his tired eyes.


	23. 23 Completely Unexpected

_Playing House_

_(Chapter Twenty Three: Completely Unexpected)_

Elliot was sound asleep when he felt her begin to stir against him. Olivia whimpered softly as he tightened his arm around her and kissed the top of her head. Outside thunder boomed and a flash of lightening lit up the room as Olivia sat up in the bed. She panted heavily and was covered in sweat.

"Liv? Sweetheart, are you okay?"

She turned her head to look at Elliot and he could tell it took her a second to remember where she was. He watched as tears rose in her eyes.

"Hey," Elliot whispered softly brushing back a bit of hair that was drenched in sweat. "It's okay. It's just a storm."

Olivia stared at him for a moment as she began to catch her breath.

"It was a dream, wasn't it? Do you want to talk about it?"

"It was just a dream," she said softly as she exhaled and looked around the room. "I have had them a lot lately. My doctor said that it isn't uncommon with pregnancy. I know they aren't real, but they feel like they are. And they really freak me out. Sometimes I wake up and I am so freaked out I end up in the bathroom vomiting for half an hour."

"Are you alright now?"

"I'll be okay," she said as she exhaled. "It was probably just everything that went on tonight and the details of the case in the back of my mind."

"You wait here and I'll get you some water," he said climbing from the bed and heading down the hall.

Olivia exhaled and lowered her hand to the place where their daughter slept inside her belly. She stretched a little and climbed out of bed as well.

"Great Olivia, it is three o'clock in the morning and everyone is asleep but you," she said moving to the window to check for the officers at their post.

She smiled a bit and patted her hand on her belly as the little girl kicked her.

"It's okay baby. They are still there. Daddy and uncle Fin are making sure of it."

She closed the blinds and made her way into the bathroom. Her belly was growing big enough that when she would wake and begin to stir, she kicked Olivia's bladder and whatever else was in her way.

A few minutes later she washed up and headed aback to bed. Just as she settled back into her place, Elliot returned with her water.

"Sorry it took so long. I wanted to make the rounds and check on the kids," he said handing her the glass.

"How are they?"

"Sound asleep."

Olivia smiled.

"I'm surprised the storm didn't wake them."

"They sleep like babies when it storms."

Olivia smiled.

"At least someone is getting some rest. I'm keeping you up all night."

"I don't mind," Elliot replied as she sat the glass on the night stand and laid back down in the bed.

Elliot laid down and rolled over to face her. He raised his hand and placed it gently against her belly.

"How is she doing in there?"

"I think she is sleeping. I haven't felt her move for a few minutes. She is usually pretty still at night. Unless I roll over wrong and make her uncomfortable. Then she kicks the hell out of me."

Elliot smiled.

"She's just like you," he said softly.

"Me?"

"Yeah, you. She likes things to be her way."

"Is that a bad thing?"

"Not at all. You just know what you want and are not afraid to go after it. It is a good quality."

"Well, I believe she has a bit of that Stabler charm," Olivia replied moving his hand to feel the little flutter of a kick. "And maybe those Stabler blues."

Elliot smiled.

"I would like for her to get her mama's good looks."

Olivia laughed.

"You make beautiful daughters."

"Daughters who are just like their mother."

"No," she said raising her hand to smooth it over his chin, "every one of these kids," she said laying her hand over his to feel the baby kick once more, "is just like their father. And they are even more amazing because of it."

"Thanks, Liv."

"You are doing a great job with them. They are great kids and I am confident they are on their way to becoming strong adults, because of the way you raised them."

"No Liv, _we_ are doing a great job. And I know that we will do a great job with this little one, too. She still needs a name, you know."

"Yeah, I know. I have been trying to think of something nice. But I can't make up my mind about what I like. So far I really think I like Lily, Abigail, Madison, Gracie and Ava. What do you think?"

"Those are nice. I like Mia."

"Mia?" she repeated as she considered the name for a moment. "I like Mia. Mia, what?"

"Mia….I don't know. I just like Mia."

"Mia has just replaced Madison in my top five."

"I guess we have a little while to settle on a name. All I want is for our family to be safe. To protect you and all of the kids. I want us to get back to a place where we all feel safe and I want this beautiful little girl to enter this world happy and healthy. I want you to be able to close your eyes at night and sleep without having these bad dreams," he said softly.

"You worry too much," she said as he laid her head against him once more.

"I worry, because I care. And you can't care too much for someone. It isn't possible."

Olivia smiled as she exhaled.

"I care too," she said softly as she raised her head to look at him with her big brown eyes.

They stared for a moment at each other in the dark and shadows in the bedroom. Before he knew it his mouth was pressed to hers. Elliot expected her to pull away from him, but she didn't. And moments later they were making love.

Everything felt so right when she was there with him, loving him, holding him as he held her. Elliot stared into her eyes, praying she could see the love he was unable to put into words.

When they had finished, Elliot held her tight in his arms.

"I missed you," he whispered as he kissed her tenderly.

"I missed you, too."

Elliot kissed her again as she settled in against him for the night,

An hour and a half later, Elliot's cell phone rang. Olivia rubbed her eyes as he hung up the phone and climbed from the bed.

"Do you really have to go?" she asked softly.

"Yeah," he said smiling back at her. "Cragen thinks he might have a lead. He wants Munch and I to check it out. But Fin is still parked outside and the new shift takes over in about half an hour."

Elliot smiled at her and leaned in to kiss her. The kiss was slow and sweet as she pulled him back to the bed.

Half an hour later, Elliot climbed from the bed again. He kissed Olivia and walked across the room to get dressed.

"Maybe I should go," she said sitting up in the bed and holding the sheet against her nude body. "The kids really shouldn't see me here. At least until we figure out exactly what is going on here."

"Stay," Elliot said softly. "Maureen will be getting everyone up and out the door in an hour or so. You'll have the house to yourself. Relax and try to get some rest."

"Okay," she agreed.

"Call me if you need me."

Olivia nodded as she watched him walk toward the bedroom door.

"Olivia," he said turning to look back at her, "I love you."

She stared at him with tears in her eyes once more. Elliot watched as she stood from the bed and made her way to him. She raised up on her tip toes and pressed her mouth against his, kissing him passionately.

"I love you too," she whispered as she smiled at him.

Elliot kissed her once more and hugged her tight.

"Be careful," she said softly as she watched him walk out the bedroom door.

"I promise," he replied pulling the door closed behind him.

She picked up Elliot's old tee shirt from the floor and pulled it back on. She jumped back into the bed and squealed for a moment in excitement. She laughed as she laid back and picked up his pillow to smell it.

"That was your daddy," she said as she patted her hand against her belly. "He is the most amazing man in the entire world. And I love him."

She sunk back into the bed and smiled as she closed her eyes. What seemed like only moments later Olivia awoke as the bedroom door flew open and the bathroom door slammed shut.

She sat up in the bed and scratched her head trying to figure out what had just happened. She stood up and walked across the room to see that the bathroom door had bounced back open and Kathleen was inside.

"Liv?" she asked looking up from the place where she had crouched in the floor.

Olivia watched still confused as the girl leaned over the threw up again.

"Kathleen, honey are you okay?" she asked wetting a wash cloth and handing it to her.

"I'll be fine. I just woke up feeling sick and Dickie wouldn't come out of the bathroom. I couldn't hold it in anymore."

"You don't feel warm," Olivia replied feeling the girl's forehead.

She watched as Kathleen stood up for a moment, then placed her hand against her abdomen and knelt to vomit some more. Kathleen groaned as she wiped her mouth and leaned back against the wall.

Olivia stared at her for a moment, praying this wasn't what she thought it was.

"How long have you been sick?" Olivia asked.

Kathleen looked up at her threatening to cry.

"Oh God, honey. You're not….are you?"

Kathleen shook her head as she began to cry. Olivia took a deep breath and knelt beside her in the floor.

"When was the last time you got your period?"

"A couple of months ago," Kathleen whispered.

"Did you take a test?"

Kathleen shook her head again. This was the one time in her life that Olivia prayed she was wrong. She exhaled and bit her lower lip.

"Get cleaned up and go back to bed. I am going to help Maureen get the other kids off to school, then you and I are going to go get a pregnancy test."

"Liv…."

"Yeah?"

"I'm scared. Dad is going to kill me."

"One thing at a time, okay?"

Kathleen drew a staggered breath as Olivia wiped the tears from her eyes.

"Right now you are just sick. And I wont let your father kill you," she said trying to drag a smile out of the teenager. "Go on back to bed."

She sat in the floor as Kathleen stood on trembling legs and made her way back to bed. Olivia walked into the kitchen and started some breakfast for the other kids.

"Livia," Eli cooed pointing at her as she picked him up.

"Good morning handsome," she said with a smile carrying him into the kitchen to have his breakfast.

One by one the kids came in and greeted her with hugs and kisses.

"Where is Kathleen?" Dickie asked as they gathered their things to leave for school.

"She is sick and still in bed."

"Dad called you to take her to the doctor?" he asked.

"Something like that. Yes, I am taking her to the doctor. And you are going to be late."

"Are you picking us up from school today, Olivia?" Elizabeth asked.

"No, baby. Maureen will pick you up and bring you back here. I'll wait her with you though until dad get's home. I was thinking we could back cookies this afternoon."

"Really?"

"Sure. But for now, you'd better get going."

The kids hugged her and headed off to school. Once they were gone Olivia went downstairs to wake Kathleen.

"I made breakfast, if you feel like eating," she replied feeling her forehead once more and really hoping for a fever.

"I don't know if I can eat," she groaned holding her arm across her stomach.

"Dry toast and water," Olivia recommended. "Not eating makes it worse. And something in the toast helps with the nausea. Either way, you should eat something. After breakfast we'll head to town."

Kathleen forced herself to eat a slice of toast, then headed for the shower. Olivia dressed and nervously waited for Kathleen to get ready to go to town.

By the time they reached the city it was almost noon. They stopped by a drugstore, where Kathleen was too embarrassed to make her purchase, so Olivia bought the test. She drove around for a little while searching for the right place to do this.

"Can't we just go to your apartment?" Kathleen asked.

"No, we can't. My apartment was broken into last night and I can't get back in just yet."

"And that is why you slept over?" Kathleen asked looking at her with Elliot's blue eyes.

"Yes. That is why I slept over," she replied pulling up to a diner and parking the car. "It's lunch time. Do you feel like you could eat?"

"I'm hungry, but I don't know."

"This is as good a place as any," Olivia replied as she pulled the little box from her purse. "This is the kind I used. As you can see it is pretty reliable," she said rubbing her hand over the little belly that seemed to grow more every day. "You just hold this part…."

"In the pee?" Kathleen asked.

"Yeah. The put this cap over the end and put it back in your purse. It says three minutes, but I would wait the full five just to be sure. You can do it now, then we can check it after lunch if you want."

"Will you go in there with me?"

Olivia could see the girl was terrified.

"Of course I will," she replied tucking a strand of long blonde hair behind her ear.

"Thanks Liv," Kathleen replied throwing her arms around the woman that once was her stepmother.

After their trip to the bathroom, Olivia found them a booth. They sat and talked for a little while over cheeseburgers and milkshakes.

"So, how did this happen?" Olivia asked.

"It only happened a couple of times," Kathleen replied and Olivia could see the shame on her face.

"You didn't use any kind of protection?"

"No, we did. Condoms. At first."

"At first?" Olivia asked looking confused.

"I sort of took them from the drawer in your room. But the second time we used one it broke. Jesse said that he didn't…." Kathleen cleared her throat and looked at the strangers all around them, "you know."

"Yes, I know."

"So, I thought things would be okay. But you guys stopped using the condoms. Jesse wouldn't buy them and we didn't know where else to get them."

"So you just had unprotected sex? Kathleen, you could have come to me."

"You would have been mad."

"No. I may have been a little shocked, yes. But I would rather you come to me and ask me for help than to end up in a situation like this."

"We only did it once with out a condom."

"Once is all it takes, honey."

"Yeah," she said softly. "I know."

"Does Jesse know that you might be pregnant?"

"I told him I was late a few weeks ago."

"What did he say?"

"Not much. He broke up with me."

"He broke up with you because you thought you were pregnant?"

"No. He signed up for the Marines a few months back. He was already scheduled to leave out for basic training and he broke up with me before he left."

"And left you here to deal with this on your own?"

"I'm so scared, Olivia. What if…."

"The most important thing to remember right now is that we love you. I love you and your father loves you. That isn't going to change, no matter what the results of that test are. Your father might be a little upset at first, but he will come around."

"He's gonna yell at me."

"Maybe so. But it is only because he loves you and he is scared for you. I think right now the best thing for you and I to do is just find out for sure."

Kathleen nodded as she stood from the booth and Olivia followed her to the ladies room. A few minutes later, the girl was throwing up again in the bathroom stall as Olivia held the positive pregnancy test in her hand.

"Now what?" Kathleen asked with tears streaming down her face as they climbed back into Olivia's car.

"Now we tell your father," Olivia replied nervously.


	24. 24 Breaking The News

_**Author's Note:**__** Sorry it has taken me so long to update. I have had finals all this past week and next week, then graduation on Friday the 13th**__**! LOL. So I have been SUPER busy. I am also working on updates for a few other stories, I will try to get them out soon. Here is an extra long update for you guys! Thank you all for being so patient! Please remember to review!**_

_**~ Detective Olivia Stabler ~ **_

_Playing House_

_(Chapter Twenty Four: Breaking The News)_

Elliot walked into the seemingly empty house.

"Hello?" he called out as he hung up his suit jacket and loosened his tie.

"Hey," Olivia said as she stepped out of the kitchen.

"It's quiet in here. I was beginning to wonder if I was the only one home. Where is everybody?"

"Kathleen is downstairs doing homework and I gave the Maureen some money to take the other kids to a movie."

"A movie?"

"Don't worry," she said with a smile, "their uncle Fin went with them."

Elliot laughed.

"So we could lock Kathleen in the basement and have a little alone time," Elliot suggested with a playful smile.

He slipped his arms around her and kissed her tenderly.

"I have been thinking about that kiss all day long," he said as he rubbed his nose against hers. "And a few other things."

Olivia laughed.

"Seriously though, she didn't want to do to the movies with the other kids?" Elliot asked.

"Actually I was kind of thinking maybe the three of us could talk over dinner."

Elliot looked up at her and stared into her eyes for a moment.

"What did she do now?"

"What?"

"Did she get expelled?"

"No."

"She's skipping school again? Kathleen, get up here!"

"Elliot! Yelling at her isn't going to fix anything."

"I'm tired of the bullshit, Olivia! She was doing so good. I don't know what to do with this girl!"

"Just hear her out. She hasn't been expelled, she isn't on drugs and she isn't drinking."

"What's going on?" he asked as Kathleen entered the room. "What is going on with you?"

Olivia could see the look of panic in Kathleen's eyes as she looked at her father.

"Time out!" Olivia said suddenly feeling the need to run interference. "Let's all have a seat at the table and we can discuss this like adults. Civil conversation. We will all use our words. No yelling and no cursing. Elliot, you sit here," she said pulling out a chair for him. "Kathleen," she said pulling out the chair across from him.

Olivia took her seat between them at the end of the table and took a deep breath. The shit was about to hit the fan.

"Okay," she said looking at Kathleen, "go ahead."

Kathleen stared at her father looking almost mortified. Elliot could tell that whatever it was she was about to reveal to him was probably going to elevate his blood pressure.

Father and daughter stared at each other for a moment in silence and Kathleen could feel her heart pounding. She closed her eyes for a moment wishing it would just explode and she wouldn't have to face him with the truth she knew would break his heart.

She opened her eyes as a tear slid down her cheek. She gulped suddenly feeling as if she could barely breathe.

"I'm pregnant," she blurted out, then closed her eyes and braced herself for the worst.

But Elliot didn't yell. He didn't make a sound. The eerie silence of the room pounded in her head as she opened her eyes to look at her father. He sat with his elbows resting on the table and his big strong hands covering his face.

Kathleen couldn't breathe as her tears began to stream down her face. She held her breath, now feeling more nauseated than she had ever felt in her life. Suddenly remembering the moments from her childhood when things weren't going quite her way and she would hold her breath until she passed out or the problem somehow seemed less important. She wouldn't breathe, she couldn't. Not until he spoke. One word. Two words. I love you. I hate you. Something. The silence was killing her.

"Daddy, please say something," she said softly as the horrible feeling inside her made her stomach churn.

Elliot smoothed his hands over his face and raised his eyes to look at her. Kathleen could see that he was crying as well.

"What do you want me to say?"

"Something. Anything."

"You ruined your life," he said staring at her with tired eyes.

Kathleen watched as Elliot stood up from the table and disappeared into his bedroom without even looking at her. She had let him down.

Kathleen drew a staggered breath and turned to look at Olivia.

"He hates me," she said with tears still streaming down her face.

"He doesn't hate you. He loves you. He is scared for you."

Olivia reached across the table and placed her hand over Kathleen's.

"He just needs a little time to let it all sink in," Olivia said softly. "You and I have had all day to accept this. It is coming to him from out of nowhere."

"This is the one time in my life I wish he had yelled at me. That would have been better than this."

"He is just hurt. And worried. He doesn't know how to react to news like this. Parents don't like to think that their children are having sex. They sure don't want to think about them being pregnant."

"Trust me, I'd rather not have to think about it either. Not now. I mean I guess I have always known I wanted to have kids. I just thought I would graduate high school first. And finish college. I'm scared, too. I know that I shouldn't have been having sex in the first place. But I thought I was doing what I was supposed to do to prevent an unplanned pregnancy. I guess even condoms aren't enough."

"The only guaranteed way to prevent pregnancy is to refrain from sex completely. Why don't I fix you a plate?"

"Thanks, Liv. But I'm not sure I could eat right now."

"Maybe just some hot tea then. It will help you relax. And it is decaf so it wont hurt the baby," Olivia said with a warm smile. "It really helps me," she said as she smoothed her hands over her belly. "Then I will check on your father."

Kathleen nodded slowly and forced a smile.

"I just don't understand how you can be so understanding and he….. Well, he wont even speak to me," Kathleen said as Olivia handed her a cup of tea.

"I figure he'll be hard enough on you for the both of us. Don't misunderstand this. I do not for a second condone anything that has taken place. But anyway we address this situation you are about to make some of the hardest decisions of your life and face one of the most important times. Because no matter what is decided, you are this baby's mother. And a part of this experience is always going to be with you. I want you to know that you have someone you can talk to. Someone who knows first hand how it feels to find yourself in the middle of an unplanned pregnancy."

Kathleen looked up at Olivia.

"You and dad didn't plan this baby?"

"No, but that doesn't mean that we love her any less. I was incredibly shocked and very scared when I found out I was pregnant. Things weren't going so well between us and I was living on my own again. And the day we met so I could tell him, was the same day our divorce was finalized. Nothing about this pregnancy has gone the way it should. Things are all mixed up right now, but I know that it will be okay. Things will be alright for Mia, because no matter what, we are still a family. We are a strong family and we all love each other and we are here for each other no matter what. Through the good times and the hard times. And this little girl has all of these amazing people around her to love and protect her. Just like you do. That is what makes it easier to believe that somehow, this will all work out."

"Mia?" Kathleen asked with a smile.

"Yeah. Mia Abigail Stabler. You're father named her."

"I think it's really pretty."

Olivia smiled and leaned forward to kiss the girl on the forehead.

"Hang in there. I know this is all scary now and it is probably going to get a lot harder before it is over. But I am confident that in the end, it will work out in the way that is best for you. You may not think so right now, but it will."

"I hope you're right," Kathleen said softly.

Olivia made her way down the hall and into the bedroom. Across the room Elliot stood staring out the window. She closed the door behind her and took a seat on the bed.

"How are you doing?" she asked softly.

"Fan-fucking tastic!" he growled without looking at her. "My daughter just came to me to tell me that she has pissed away everything she has ever worked for and ruined the rest of her life!"

"Elliot, it isn't that bad."

"Isn't that bad? She is seventeen years old, Olivia! She hasn't even finished high school, yet!"

"She still can. But not if we tell her she won't. She needs our support more now than ever."

"Our support? How long have you known?" he asked and she could tell he was frustrated with her.

"I found out this morning."

"So she told you before she told me?"

"She didn't exactly tell me anything. I figured it out and she didn't deny it. She burst in here this morning and was throwing up in the bathroom, because the other bathroom was occupied. At first she insisted she was just sick, but having recently been through it myself, I knew exactly what was going on. She said she wasn't sure, so I took her to get a test. When we found out for sure, I told her we had to tell you tonight."

"Well, that was very thoughtful of you," he replied sarcastically.

"You go ahead and be angry at me if you want to. But that isn't going to help the situation any."

"What am I supposed to do, Olivia? Smile and pretend that I am thrilled about the fact that my underage child is about to make me a grandparent?"

"She is seventeen years old…."

"Yeah, so?"

"So, by New York state law she is legally of age. If the boy is over seventeen, you know as well as I do, that nothing illegal has taken place here."

"It should be illegal. She is still a child herself."

"I know," Olivia agreed exhaling softly. "But she is about to do a lot of growing up really fast. She doesn't really have a choice at this point."

Elliot stared at her for a moment.

"You think she should have this baby?"

"I think we should explore all of our options before making a choice for her. I could call and make her an appointment….."

"There is a clinic downtown. It is an in and out thing. She'll miss a few days of school, then get on with her life."

Olivia sat there speechless.

"I didn't mean that type of appointment," she said looking at him very disappointedly. "You don't even believe in abortion."

"Desperate times call for desperate measures, Olivia! I don't believe in my teenaged daughter wasting her life for one little mistake!"

"So because this baby was unplanned it was a mistake?"

"The mother is barely seventeen and the father….. who is barely older than she is, is God knows where! So, yes! I would think this qualifies as a mistake!"

"Our baby was unplanned. Do you think she was a mistake, too?"

"Of course not. We were married! It isn't even the same thing!"

"We were pretending to be married," she corrected him. "Doing the exact same things she wasn't supposed to be doing. The circumstances are a bit different, I agree. But in many ways it is exactly the same thing. How can you be thrilled about Mia and want to kill this baby?"

"I don't want to kill anyone! I just want to do what is best for my child."

"How could an abortion possibly be the best thing for Kathleen? For anyone?"

"I don't have all of the answers, Olivia! I have never had to deal with this before."

"Neither have I. Neither has she. This is new for all of us and I think that is even more reason to take a little time and think this through before we act on the situation. I will call my doctor in the morning and try to get her an appointment. They will check her out and be able to tell us how far along she is. We will get a due date and that will give us an idea of how long we have to make a decision. We still have time. Right now, you should really go back in there and talk to your daughter. Because she is convinced that you hate her because of this."

"I don't hate her. It would be a lot easier if I could hate her. She is my daughter, I love her."

"Maybe you should tell her that."

"I'm just not ready to face her right now. I need more time. I think I'm going to take a shower and go on to bed."

"You're not even going to talk to her?"

"Not tonight. If I don't think out exactly what I'm gonna say to her, I am liable yell at her. We'll talk about it tomorrow."

Olivia nodded in agreement. Maybe taking a little time to think things through wasn't a bad idea after all.

"Can you let me know when the kids get home?"

"I will."

"Liv…."

"Yes?"

"Thank you for being here. For me and for her. This is one of those times when she really needs her mother. Kathy would have known exactly what to do."

Olivia forced a smile.

"This kind of thing isn't easy for any parent to handle, Elliot."

"I wish I knew how to make her understand."

"Maybe could spend a little less time trying to make her understand where you are coming from and try a little harder to understand how she is feeling right now."

Elliot raised his head to look into her eyes. As much as he wanted to get all defensive and argue his point, he knew Olivia was right. It was just over twenty years ago that he and Kathy had found themselves in a very similar situation.

Elliot moved to her side and wrapped his arms around her. Olivia smiled and raised her arms around his neck. She rubbed the tip of her nose against his and he kissed her tenderly.

"I don't know how I would have survived these last few years without you," Elliot said softly as he kissed her again. "Stay. For a little while. For the night. Things just are just better when you're here."

"Okay," she whispered smiling softly.

Olivia turned into him laying her head against his shoulder as Elliot held her for a moment. He slipped his hands down her back and she smiled as they made their way around to the small bump where their baby girl laid sleeping.

"Another daughter," he said with a smile. "I guess after going through everything we've been through with the older three, raising this one should be a breeze."

Olivia laughed.

"Don't count on it, daddy. She is still liable to give you a few little surprises."

Elliot laughed.

"There will be a few new rules."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah."

"Like what?"

"Like no dating until she's thirty. And we're starting her on birth control when she is seven."

Olivia laughed.

"That is just a little drastic. But I'm sure we can work something out."

Kathleen was leaned against the wall in the hallway when Olivia stepped out of the bedroom.

"Thank you," she whispered with wiping her tears with the back of her hand. "For talking him out of an abortion, I mean. I know that I am probably not the most fit person to be having a baby. But I don't want anyone to kill it either," she sobbed.

Olivia nodded her head as she herself got a little misty eyed.

"I don't know about you, but Mia and I are starving! Do you wanna join us for a little dinner?"

"Okay," Kathleen agreed as they walked back to the kitchen.

"You know, your brothers and sisters will be home soon. And I promised Elizabeth you guys could make cookies tonight."

"That sounds like fun."

"Sounds like a good way to unwind."

Kathleen laughed.

"It does," she agreed.

The next morning Kathleen sat at the bar in the kitchen eating a bowl of cereal as the other kids buzzed around getting ready for school. Elliot was late getting up and barely said a word to anyone as he sat at the table drinking his coffee and reading the sports section of the paper.

"Kathleen," he called to her on her way out the door.

She stopped and looked back at him.

"Why don't you stay back? Olivia and I would like to talk to you. She can drop you off at school a later."

"Okay," she replied motioning for Maureen to go on without her.

Kathleen dropped her book bag by the door and walked back to her barstool in the kitchen.

"What's up?" she asked softly turning her attention to Olivia.

"I called my doctor and she just happened to have a cancellation for this afternoon. We need to get you in to see her," Olivia said.

"What do they do?" Kathleen asked.

"She will do an exam and do some other things like listen to the heartbeat to make sure the baby is alright. She will probably want to draw some blood and maybe even do another pregnancy test, just to be sure. She will be able to tell us about when your baby is due. Of course you are still pretty early, sometimes the due date changes a little before it is actually time for the baby to come."

"You will be there with me, right?"

"If you want me to be. Of course. Whatever makes you more comfortable."

"I really don't want to go in alone."

"Your appointment is just after mine," Olivia replied with a smile. "I'll stay as long as you like."

"I am going to set up an appointment with a lawyer," Elliot said.

"A lawyer?" Kathleen asked looking a bit confused.

"There is a firm across town that specializes in adoption. I am going to meet with them and get things lined out. They will find a good family for the baby," he said looking her in the eye for the first time since she had broke the news to him. "You are just too young. You're still in high school. You've made the honor roll and applied for colleges. You have plans for your future, you have dreams, Kathleen. I'm not going to let you give up on any of that. This is just the best thing to do, I think, for you and this baby."

Kathleen was silent as she drew a deep breath and nodded in agreement. She reached up and wiped away her tears with the sleeve of her sweatshirt, trying to control her emotions.

"I have a big chemistry exam second period," she said with a mousy voice.

Olivia cleared her throat, holding back her own tears.

"Why don't you get your things and head on out to the car. I'll be out in a minute," she said watching as Kathleen picked up her bag and headed out the door.

"I'll pick her up on my way to the doctor's office. Are you coming to this one?"

"I don't know if I can make it. Is this a big one?"

"Not for me. My doctor just wants to do a follow up after I was attacked the other night. But I'm fine and Mia is fine. Kathleen could really use your support, though."

"The last thing she wants is her father in the room while she is getting a gynecological exam."

"It isn't all going to be the exam. And you don't even have to be in the room. Just knowing that you are there would mean a lot to her."

"Like I said, I don't know if I can make it."

"Can you at least try?" she asked wrapping her arms around his neck and kissing him. "You can't let this destroy the relationship between you and your daughter. She is young and she made a mistake. I think she is handling this very well. She has been very mature about the entire situation."

"If she was so mature she wouldn't have gotten pregnant in the first place. Mature people know to use a condoms if they are having sex."

"She was using condoms," Olivia replied.

"How do you know this?"

"I talked to her about it while we were waiting for the results of the test. She had been stealing condoms from the night stand in our room."

"That's why we went through them so fast."

"The same condoms we were using when I got pregnant."

"The ones that I bought," he thought out loud. "You think they were defective?"

"I think they were cheap. One broke with us."

"So you're saying it is my fault my seventeen year old daughter is pregnant?"

"Not at all! I am simply trying to say that maybe she thought she was being responsible. I know, she shouldn't have been having sex in the first place. But she is a teenager. You and I were both sexually active by the time we were her age."

"You were?"

Olivia laughed as she twisted his tie in her fingers.

"I know you were hurt by all of this, Elliot. But you also know that she didn't do it to hurt you. She loves you and it is eating her up inside that you can't look at her without blame or even talk to her the way you used to."

"From the moment they are born you spend your life trying to protect your kids and hoping that they don't ever have to suffer through the same mistakes that you did."

"Maureen was a mistake?"

"Keeping her wasn't. But getting pregnant so young, was. I can't count the number of things that Kathy and I both gave up because we had kids so early. She had dreamed of becoming a pediatrician, but she gave up college completely. I finished in night school and it was a financial struggle for years. Living paycheck to paycheck and never seeing my family because I needed the overtime. Not knowing how I was going to feed my wife and babies. Shortly after Maureen came Kathleen, a few years later the twins. I love my children more than anything in the world, Olivia. But I know first hand the struggles that come with having babies before you are ready to start a family. I don't want Kathleen to end up settling like her mother did. I want to make sure that all of her dreams come true."

"You are a very dedicated father. But I really think that you should do something to try and reconnect with her. Let her know that you still love her."

"She knows I love her."

"I know she does, El. But right now I think that she could use a little reinforcement. She is scared to death that she has disappointed you so badly that…."

"I won't love her anymore? That is ridiculous."

"She is a kid, Elliot. She needs to hear from you that things are going to be okay between the two of you. This is a very scary time for her."

"This is a scary time for us all. I'll talk to her."

"Thank you," Olivia said sweetly as she kissed him once more. "I'd better get her to school."

"I'll see you at work."

"Alright."

"I love you."

Olivia turned and smiled at him as she walked out the door.

"I love you, too."

That afternoon Kathleen paced nervously in the waiting area as Olivia waited for her appointment.

"Honey, you need to fill this out," she said looking down at the clipboard in her hand. "They need personal information. Information I don't know."

"Like what?" the girl asked taking a seat beside Olivia.

"Like the date of your last menstrual cycle and they want to know how long you've been sexually active."

Kathleen groaned.

"I know. The questions are a pain, but they really do need the information."

"It is just private stuff."

"Yeah. But things become a little less private when you are pregnant. Every woman who comes in here has to answer these questions."

Kathleen exhaled and began to mark her answers on the page.

Olivia raised her attention to the parking lot hoping to see Elliot's car pull in. But he wasn't there.

Twenty minutes later Kathleen stood beside Olivia while the doctor performed her exam. Olivia could tell by the look on the girl's face she was nervous.

"It isn't that bad. It doesn't really hurt, it just feels a little awkward."

"And it doesn't take long," the doctor replied pulling off her gloves and washing her hands. "Everything looks just fine, Olivia. If you want to slide back on the table we can take a look at this little girl."

Kathleen smiled as the doctor moved the wand over Olivia's baby bump and little Mia appeared on the screen.

"There she is. Very active."

"Yeah, she is," Olivia agreed.

"Have you experienced any cramping or bleeding?"

"No."

The doctor took a few measurements.

"Everything seems to be right on track. Your baby girl looks happy and healthy," the doctor replied handing Olivia the print out of Mia's ultrasound pictures. "I'll give you a few minutes to get dressed. Kathleen, if you want to come with me I will show you to a room down the hall so that you can get changed into your gown."

"I'll be right there," Olivia assured her.

Down the hall, Olivia held Kathleen's hand as the doctor examined her. As the doctor covered the girl from the waist down with a sheet and raised the gown to start the ultrasound, Olivia was shocked to see the size of Kathleen's extended abdomen was more than twice that of her own.

"How far along is she?" Olivia asked the doctor.

"Let me get a look here," the woman said placing the wand against Kathleen's abdomen to find the baby.

They watched as the doctor measured Kathleen's baby and estimated her to be about thirty two weeks pregnant. Almost two full months further along than Olivia.

"Wow," Olivia said watching the baby move on the screen. "I didn't realize that you were this far along."

"Neither did I," Kathleen said softly. "I thought for a little while that I could possibly be…..but then I got my period. When it was late again the next month, I figured it would come again. Then it didn't. And I started feeling sick. I tried not to think about it. I told myself it was just the flu or something. Then I got better for a while. I guess I was in denial. Not thinking about it, not facing it, meant it wasn't real. Then over the past few days I have been feeling sick again. Then I was pretty sure that was what was going on."

"Most women eventually come out of the morning sickness as the pregnancy progresses. But for some women, morning sickness drags out through the entire pregnancy."

"Do you think I'm gonna be sick the whole time?"

"I can prescribe something for the nausea. Would you like to know the baby's sex?"

Kathleen stared for a moment at the screen watching as her son or daughter moved around and feeling the baby kick inside of her.

"No," she said as a tear rolled off her cheek. "I'm not keeping the baby."

"Well, everything looks perfect. I want to get you started on some prenatal vitamins and I will write you a prescription for the nausea. You need to make sure you are drinking plenty of water. Try to eat well balanced meals. You could stand to gain a little more weight. I want to see you in here again in a couple of weeks, alright?"

"Yeah." she agreed.

Olivia set up their appointments as Kathleen got dressed.

"You did good in there," Olivia said as they walked down the hall toward the exit. "I know this isn't easy on you."

"Dad's right, I guess. This is what is right for the baby. It deserves a real family, right?"

Olivia forced a smile and hugged Kathleen. As they walked through the waiting area Olivia spotted someone she recognized.

"Dad?" Kathleen asked as Elliot stood to greet them. "What are you doing here?"

Elliot smiled at Olivia then turned his attention to his daughter.

"I came to take my girls to lunch. Assuming the two of you don't already have plans?"

"Dropping by the drugstore and picking up a few prescriptions. Nothing we couldn't do a little later," Olivia said with a smile.

"How'd it go?" Elliot asked as he opened the car door for Olivia.

"Mia is just fine. Everything is right on schedule," she said handing him the sonogram pictures.

"What about you, honey? How did your appointment go?" he asked looking up at Kathleen in the rearview mirror.

Kathleen raised her eyes to meet him and smiled.

"It went good. She said the baby is healthy. And I am due in two months."

"Two months?"

Kathleen exhaled.

"I am a lot further along than I thought."

Elliot looked over at Olivia as she squeezed his hand, reminding him to keep his cool with her.

"I spoke to that lawyer and he said he could help us. He is going to get together a few profiles of couples who waiting to adopt a baby. We're going to make an appointment to go meet with him together. You can read through the profiles and you will get to choose the family you give the baby to. He will also talk to you about different types of adoption and you can decide what is right for you."

He watched through the rearview mirror as she leaned her forehead against the glass to stare out the back window.

"It's a lot to take in all at once. We still have a little time. Right now, I think you should decide where we are gonna go for lunch."

Kathleen looked back at her father and smiled.


	25. 25 Heart To Heart

_Playing House_

_(Chapter Twenty Five: Heart to Heart)_

The last few weeks had been long and crazy for Elliot. Not only had they failed to capture the psycho who seemed to be after his wife….ex-wife, but living with two pregnant women was really taking it's toll on him. With everything going on, Elliot had managed to sweet talk Olivia into staying at the house with him and the kids most of the time. Occasionally, she'd spend a night or so at the apartment, but she always seemed to end up back here.

The insomnia, mood swings, and strange cravings were enough to send any man over the edge. Dealing with this insanity from both his wife and daughter was really wearing him out. But the truth was he was happy to have her there, to know that she and the baby were safe and for the support she provided for he and the kids.

It had been just over two weeks since he had learned of the news of Kathleen's pregnancy. And so far things were working out far better than he had thought they would. With the exception of a few questions from the younger kids about the future of their sister's child, that topic of conversation had pretty much come to a rest for the time being.

Elliot made his way into the kitchen and poured himself a cup of coffee. He leaned against the counter and watched as the other occupants of the household scurried around him busily readying for their day.

"We're gonna be late," Maureen reminded Dickie as she took the hairbrush he was holding just out of Elizabeth's reach and taunting her with. "Eat. Now," she ordered as he settled into his seat at the table to finish his morning cereal.

"When Kathleen has her baby, where will it sleep?" Elizabeth asked as Maureen began to French braid her hair.

"Dad and Liv have already explained this. The baby is going to live with another family. They will have a room and a crib for the baby there, that's where it will sleep."

"Why does the baby have to go live with another family? Is our family too full?"

"Our family isn't too full," she replied with a warm smile as she knelt to better explain the situation to her younger sister. "Sometimes there are people who really want to be mommies and daddies, but they can't have babies of their own. So they adopt a baby from somebody else. They take that baby home and love it and care for it and give it the best life they can."

"But how come Kathleen doesn't love the baby?"

"Kathleen does love the baby. She loves it very much. And it is very hard for her to give the baby to a new family. But sometimes women are too young to raise children when they become mommies."

"She's too young because she is still a kid, right?" Elizabeth asked.

"Right," Maureen agreed.

"She has to go to school and the baby would be too little for school."

"Very true."

"Oh, I understand now," she said with a smile.

"Good. Now go finish your breakfast. We have to leave in five minutes," Maureen replied.

"You did a good job with her," Elliot said as Maureen poured herself a quick cup of coffee.

"Sometimes it's a little confusing for me and I'm an adult," she replied. "They just don't understand."

"You did a good job explaining it to her."

"No, dad. They don't understand why we have to give this baby away, but you guys are keeping Mia. It's confusing," she said staring at him.

"You are old enough to understand."

"I get it, dad. They just don't understand it."

"They will when they are older."

"I'd better get my things together," she said pouring the last of her coffee out and sitting her cup in the sink.

"Hey," Elliot said as she turned to look at him. "I love you."

Maureen smiled looking so much like her mother.

"I love you too, dad."

"And I am proud of you," he said turning to look at Kathleen as well. "I am proud of all of you. We've had a lot of hard times and I know it has been rough on all of you. We do the best that we can and we stick together. I just want you guys to know how much I love you all and I am proud of you. And mom would be proud, too. There is nothing you could say or do that would ever change that."

Kathleen stood and threw her arms around his chest, burying her tear stained face in his shirt as she hugged him tight.

"I love you too daddy," she gasped as she drew a deep breath.

"We really have to go," Maureen reminded her with a soft pat on the back.

She pulled Eli from his high chair and grabbed his diaper bag as she headed out the door.

"You guys have a good day at school," Elliot said waving as the kids made their way to the car.

Elliot made himself a bowl of cereal and took a seat at the table with the newspaper like he did every morning. A few minutes later Olivia made her way into the room. He watched as she rubbed her tired eyes and instinctively smoothed one hand across her belly to still their restless child.

Elliot watched as she fixed a cup of hot water and dropped a tea bag into it as she stared out the window. He smiled and moved across the room. Olivia moaned softly as he began to rub her back and shoulders. Elliot slipped his arms around her belly and felt the little girl kicking around inside.

"Good morning," he said, leaning in and hoping to steal a kiss.

"Ehh," she pulling back from him and making an unpleasant face. "You have coffee breath."

"I'm sorry," Elliot replied raising his hand in an attempt to smell the offensive odor. "I just had a cup. I didn't think about it. It's the same as it is every other morning when I kiss you."

"Yea, well, I didn't spend every other morning leaned over the toilet vomiting for half an hour. Seriously, El," she said covering her nose and mouth with her hand. "it's about to make me sick."

He exhaled and kissed the back of her neck.

"I don't want to do that," he replied. "I guess I'd better go get cleaned up," he said heading down the hall for a shower.

Two hours later Elliot sat in an interrogation room with Fin listening to him question a rape suspect.

"Are we boring you, detective?" the suspect asked catching Elliot in a yawn.

"My partner here didn't get any sleep last night because somebody had to chase down your punk ass!" Fin replied slamming his hands down on the table and leaning into the man's personal space.

"I told you, I ain't telling you nothing," the man replied scooting back as Fin stood and walked back over to Elliot.

"This is gonna take a while. Why don't you go grab a cup of coffee?"

"I'll be alright. I would like to step out and check on Liv, though. She's been sick all morning."

"Go ahead. I can handle this chump," Fin whispered.

Elliot hid a smile as he walked out of the room. He walked out to the bullpen to find Olivia sitting at her desk eating.

"Hot wings?" he asked turning his chair around to face her and taking a seat. "You have been throwing up all morning and you're eating hot wings for breakfast?"

Olivia smiled and laughed a little.

"Crazy, right? This obviously a pregnancy thing."

"Do you even like hot wings?"

"No, but apparently Mia does."

Elliot smiled and leaned into her.

"Oh, wait. I can't kiss you, the smell of me makes you sick," he teased pulling away from her.

"El," she whined, batting her pretty brown eyes at him. "I'm sorry. It was a mean thing to say."

"You were having a rough morning."

"It was very rough," she agreed. "But I still shouldn't have said it. I care about you, I shouldn't say mean things that hurt you."

"Who me?" Elliot asked acting like a tough guy. "Really, you didn't bother me. I know you were sick and I didn't realize that coffee breath would make it that much worse. Now I do."

Olivia smiled.

"I gotta get back in there, I just wanted to make sure you were alright."

"Thanks for checking on me."

"I was thinking maybe we could have lunch together when I get done here," he said walking back toward the interrogation room. "I'll buy."

"I could live with that," she replied with a smile as he turned to go down the hall. "El?"

"Yeah?" he asked backing up to look at her.

"Can I have a kiss?" she asked sweetly.

Elliot laughed and shook his head. He leaned forward over her desk and kissed her tenderly.

"Thank you," she replied with a smile staring up at him with big eyes.

"I've never had a hot wing flavored kiss before," he joked.

"How was it?"

"Not too bad," he said with a smile as he leaned in to swipe one more.

Later that day Elliot took her to her favorite burger place for lunch. He stared at her as she swirled each French fry in ketchup before biting the tip off and repeating the process.

"What?" she asked looking at him across the table.

Elliot smiled.

"You eat fries the same way that Eli does."

Olivia laughed.

"I'm not usually a ketchup person, infact I usually dip my fries in mustard, but lately it seems I can't get enough of it."

"Mia likes ketchup, too?"

"I guess so," she laughed. "I've been meaning to talk to you."

Elliot looked a little worried.

"This could be dangerous," he replied. "The last time you 'had to talk to me' it was to tell me my seventeen year old daughter was pregnant."

"It's nothing like that," she assured him. "I just wanted to see if we could set a day for you to come over to the apartment and help me get the nursery set up. Mia will be here in a few weeks and I really want to get things ready for her. I didn't really want to talk about this at the house in front of Kathleen. I know it is all kind of a sensitive subject for her."

"I thought we could just set the nursery up at the house."

"El, we talked about this. I mean, I thought we agreed we would set up a crib for Mia at the house and set up a nursery for her at the apartment."

"I know what we agreed. I was just really hoping I would have talked you into moving back in before that time came. I really want you and Mia at the house with the rest of us."

Olivia exhaled.

"I know what you want. I just don't think it is a good idea. I don't think it is good on this baby or anyone for us to just live together and pretend that things are just amazing between us. It gives them false hope. Besides, there really isn't room for another nursery."

"We will make room. And it isn't false hope if we actually try to make living together work. You sleep there half the time anyway."

"And that needs to stop, too. All of this….whatever it is. It is confusing. We are sending mixed signals, to the kids and to ourselves."

"What are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about the way that we act. What kind of example are we setting here?"

"We are setting the example of two loving parents."

"You know what I mean. We can't keep acting like we're married, Elliot. I'm not your wife anymore. And it isn't fair to any of the kids to go on acting like I am."

Elliot sat quiet for a moment. This must have been her seven month pregnant way of telling him that she didn't want to be with him after all.

"Alright. From now on, if you stay I will sleep on the couch. No more pretending," he said trying hard to hide the fact that she had just wounded him. "No more kissing and massages and lovey dovey stuff. I got it."

Olivia watched him for a moment realizing she had upset him.

"El…"

"No, you're right. It isn't fair to pretend you love someone when you don't."

Olivia felt her heart sink in her chest.

"People get hurt," he continued. "I can be there any afternoon this week to help with the nursery."

"Thank you," she replied softly, suddenly feeling nauseated once more.

After lunch they continued with their plans to check out a baby furniture store down the block. Things were uncomfortably quiet between them until a sales girl approached.

"How can I help you today?" she asked with a friendly smile.

"We need furniture for our nursery," Olivia answered placing her palm against her belly.

"Aww," the girl replied. "Boy or girl?"

"A little girl," Olivia said with a proud smile.

"We have a new collection over her that is just lovely. It is kind of a combination of the classic and modern looks. Very elegant. It comes in four finishes, it is a little on the pricey side, but well worth the money," she said looking at Elliot.

"What ever she wants," he replied. "The money doesn't matter."

"This collection is available in black, white, cherry and natural."

"This is beautiful," Olivia replied smoothing her hand over one of the rails. "This one is a convertible bed?"

"Yes. It converts to a toddler, daybed or twin and to a full size bed."

"I really love this. What do you think?" she asked looking at Elliot.

"It's pretty."

"I think this is the one I want. In black."

"Do you want the full five piece set?"

"Yes," Elliot said handing the girl his credit card. "And we need two of the cribs."

The girl looked at Olivia as Elliot turned to walk away. Liv nodded to her and followed along behind Elliot.

"What else does she need?" he asked looking over a rack of baby clothing. "You're gonna need the bedding, diapers and all of the bath stuff."

"We don't have to get it all today."

"You were right though, we need to get things ready for when she comes. I want to make sure you have everything you need for her."

"We will need some things for the house, too," Olivia suggested.

"I'd better grab a cart."

They walked around for an hour or so picking out items for Mia.

"Do you want me to paint her room or put up any wallpaper?"

"There is a border, but I already put it up. It is green with yellow and white daises."

"Green and yellow?"

Olivia smiled.

"I didn't want to go overboard on the pink. And her bedding is sage green and pink, so it will kind of tie in with the border."

"I'm glad her mother has a sense of style. I have always just gone with pink is for a girl and blue for a boy."

Olivia smiled, relived to see him start to lighten up a bit.

"I could set the room up tonight if you want. Since there is no painting or anything like that to do it should only take a couple of hours."

"Really?"

"Sure. I think it's time we focus on Mia for a little while."

Olivia smiled and in that moment Elliot realized that he would do anything to make her smile like that.

Back at the apartment Olivia watched as Elliot struggled to put the crib together.

"Do you need help?" she asked as he wrinkled his brow and turned the directions around to inspect them once more.

"I'll get it. You should take it easy."

Olivia laughed.

"I have been sitting here for an hour and a half watching. It isn't like I am working hard."

"You'd think this being my sixth child and all that I would be able to do this blindfolded."

"We could have had the delivery guys set this stuff up."

"I'm her father, Liv. It is my job to put together the furniture for the baby's room. I got the dresser and the changing table put together, it's just this damn crib. It seems like there should be more pieces to this thing," he said trying to make the sides fit together.

Olivia exhaled and laid back on the new carpet. She looked around the room and smiled, this seemed like the perfect bedroom for a baby girl. Beginning to wonder how she was going to get up, she raised up on her elbows and noticed something shiny across the room.

"El, what is this?" she asked picking up a small piece of metal from the floor under the changing table and handing it to him.

"That would be the bracket that holds these two sides together," he said scratching his head. "Now how on Earth did it get way over there?"

Olivia watched as he put the bracket into place and tightened the last few screws. They slid the crib into place and Elliot put the mattress into it.

Elliot looked up as she disappeared into the hallway.

"How the hell does this thing work?" he asked himself aloud as he inspected the instruction page again.

"Dinner is here. Why don't you take a break? Have a beer and some pizza."

"You probably shouldn't be drinking in your condition," he joked.

"Funny."

"Seriously though, why keep beer if you can't drink it?"

"I got it because you like it," she replied handing him a plate with three slices of supreme pizza on it.

"You're not gonna eat any?"

"I ordered a separate one for me," she said opening a second pizza box.

"What is that?" Elliot asked turning up his nose at the aroma.

"Black olive, jalapeno, pineapple and double pepperoni. I didn't think you would be interested."

"Hey, if you take off the pineapple it doesn't sound half bad."

"Help yourself," she said sitting beside him on the sofa and placing the pizza box on the coffee table in front of them.

Olivia exhaled and rubbed her hand over her swollen belly.

"Everything alright?" Elliot asked looking worried.

"I'm fine. Mia just gets really excited when it is time to eat."

Elliot smiled.

"Then she kicks around like crazy in there without any concern for mommy's major organs. She kicked me in the bladder so hard this morning that I almost peed my pants at work."

Elliot smiled as he sat his plate down and slid closer to her. He placed one hand on each side of her belly and smoothed them around feeling the baby moving inside.

"It is hard to believe that she is going to be here in about nine weeks."

"I know," Olivia agreed. "This pregnancy seems to have gone by really fast. Except for the strange cravings and morning sickness, I have kind of enjoyed being pregnant."

"Do you think you'll ever have another one?" he asked.

"I would really like to have this one before I start planning the next baby," she said with a smile. "Do you want any more?" she asked as Elliot began to massage her swollen feet for her.

"You don't think six are enough?"

Olivia laughed.

"I guess you have a point."

"I don't know," he said staring into her eyes, "if you and I were together and you wanted to have another baby somewhere further down the road, I think I could go for that."

"What am I to you?" she asked as he looked confused. "I'm not your wife anymore. And I'm not your girlfriend."

"You're my baby mama," he joked as a serious look crossed her face.

"Elliot, what are we? To each other, I mean. We're not just friends, but we aren't together either. Not really anyway. We need to figure out what is going on here and stick to it. And if we aren't together, the sex and the kissing….they have to stop. We need some boundaries here. I don't want to be your friend with benefits. The only thing that I know is real is that you and I are about to have a baby together."

"I care about you, Olivia. I love you and that's real. There isn't anything that I wouldn't do for you and for our daughter. I want us. As a couple and as a family. I want you to move back into the house and us to raise our kids together, all six of them. I don't want Mia to grow up being bounced between two homes. I don't want to go to sleep at night and not be under the same roof as you and our daughter. Can't we just give it a try? A real chance. For Mia?"

"I don't know that now is the best time to start a relationship. Things are already crazy enough on the kids and this crazed psycho out there without adding all of our drama in there too. And if it didn't work out….I don't think that any of us need the stress of a break up right now."

"Olivia, I am asking you to just give me a chance. Then at least we know we tried. I think our baby deserves that."

"I know she does," Olivia whispered with tears in her eyes. "But I don't think that jumping into a life together is fair to anyone. We have spent so long pretending to be together that we don't even know if we would work out as a real couple."

"All we can do is try."

"Elliot, I do love you with all of my heart. I just need some time, things are happening so fast. The world around me is spinning so fast….I just need a little time to think things through. To just be me again, to figure out who I am and focus on this pregnancy….this baby."

"Jesus, Liv. It doesn't have to be that complicated. Just tell me what you want. You either want me or you don't. Make up your mind."

Elliot stared at her with tears streaming down her face. He felt horrible for making her cry, but the fact that she seemed to keep changing her mind about whether or not she wanted this life with him was killing him.

"I don't know what I want," was all she could say as she drew a staggered breath.

Elliot stared at her in disbelief, he had been so certain that she would choose him. He nodded slowly as he stood from the sofa and leaned forward to kiss the top of her head, then made his way to toward the door.

"I just need some time, Elliot. Things are happening so fast," she pleaded in hopes that he would understand where she was coming from.

But "good night, Liv," was all he said as he closed the door behind him.

Olivia wiped the tears from her face as she locked the door behind him and went to bed.

Elliot sat in his car parked on her street and stared up at her window. He knew exactly what she was trying to say and he understood, still he was devastated. The one thing he wanted more than anything was to hear her say she still wanted to be with him. But Olivia could never say something she just didn't feel.

"Pull yourself together man," he mumbled as she shut off the lights in the apartment and he started the car.

He drove around for a few hours just wasting time. He didn't really know where he was going, but he wasn't ready to go home. Finally he parked in front of an old tavern the gang from work used to frequent back in the day.

He took a seat at the bar and ordered a beer. Wallowing in self-pity he drank it down and ordered another.

"Been a while since I saw you here," he heard from behind him.

Elliot turned around as Fin took a seat beside him.

"I thought that was your car outside," Fin said.

"I can't take a piss without someone knowing about it," Elliot grumbled. "Aren't you supposed to be watching the house?"

"Actually I am _supposed_ to be working on a rape case. I was watching your house out of the kindness of my heart as a favor to you. Munch relieved me a little over an hour ago, he's got things under control. I went past Liv's apartment to make sure everything was in order, then I thought I'd stop off here for a drink before heading home for a little shut eye. What are you doing here?"

"Just feeling sorry for myself. Thinking how badly I have managed to screw things up this time and I am not even sure what I did."

"Trouble in paradise?"

Elliot just glared at him.

"Not a joking matter. I'm sorry," Fin said taking a sip from his beer. "Seriously though, talking about it will make you feel better."

"It's nothing. I just finally realized tonight what has been going on all along."

"What's that?"

"I love her, Fin. With everything inside of me, I love her. Like I have never loved any other woman and will never love another woman, I love her."

"So tell her that, man."

"I've tried. She just doesn't get it. And I finally realized that loving someone that much doesn't guarantee that they'll love you back."

Fin gulped and set his beer down on the bar as he stared at his friend.

"She doesn't want me," Elliot said softly and Fin could hear the heartbreak in his voice. "Not the way that I want her."

"There has just been a lot of stuff going on…." Fin said trying to make his friend feel better. "Maybe she just…."

"Needs a little time?" Elliot asked cutting him off. "She has had this entire time to think about things. We are about to have a baby together for God's sake. Shouldn't you know what you want from someone before you decide to raise a baby with them?"

"Women don't think about things the same way that we do, El. Sometimes they just need a little time to process the things that are going on around them. She is pregnant and tired and then she was attacked by this freak Parker and with everything going on at home….maybe she just needs a little time."

"Now you sound like Liv."

"Or…." Fin began.

"Or?"

"Maybe you don't want to hear it. But it could be that in all of this on again, off again stuff and with the finalization of the divorce…."

"Yeah?"

"Well, I don't know that this is what is going on at all. But…."

"But what, Fin?"

"Well, maybe Olivia has already made up her mind. Maybe she is trying to find a way to tell you that it just isn't working out for her. And this back and forth thing is really hard on everyone involved."

"Have you talked to her?"

"No. Like I said, I have no idea what is going on, man. I wish I had answers for you, but I don't. I'm just saying maybe you should walk away for a while. Move on with your life. Let her figure her shit out and if she comes back then give it another shot."

"Move on with my life?" Elliot repeated shaking his head unable to believe this was even an option.

Fin watched as he reached into his pocket and laid his fist on the table. Elliot opened his palm to reveal a small velvet box with a diamond ring inside.

"I was going to ask her to marry me. For real this time."

"For real?"

"Again. I was going to tell her that my life is shit without her in it and I live every day for her. I was going to promise her forever and vow to love and protect her always, to confess to her that I have never loved another woman even half as much as I love her. And tell her that I want her to move back home, with me and the kids. I want us to start all over and build a life together. The kind of life that our baby daughter deserves to have. I was going to give her this ring and ask her to be my wife again, because without her, I am only half a man with half a heart. She is the best part of me and the best thing that has ever happened to me."

"What did she say?"

"She asked me to help her pick out baby furniture."

"That's a good start."

"For her apartment, Fin. I spent the evening setting up Mia's nursery in the apartment. She is staying there again and she doesn't want to move back into the house."

"Elliot, I'm sorry."

"I guess I just thought that I would be able to talk to her. To tell her how I feel and make her understand how much I love her, how much a part of this family she is, how much we all love her. I thought she would come home and we would try again and I would do anything to make it work. I would do anything for her, anything to make her feel for me the way I feel about her." Elliot exhaled and closed the ring box. "But that isn't enough. I can't make her love me, if she doesn't."

"I don't think for a second that Olivia doesn't love you. Maybe all you can do is wait it out. I know how bad this sucks and how bad it feels. But if you really love her, all you can do is wait. Give her the time she has asked you for and try to be supportive. Remember above everything else she is your best friend and she is about to have your child. Show her that you are going to be there for her, no matter what. I'm sorry you are hurting so bad and even more sorry that I don't have any suggestions to make the pain go away. Just hang in there. And try to be patient. I don't think God has given up on the two of you just yet."

"I hope you're right," Elliot replied slipping the ring box back into his pocket.

"I'll give you a lift back to the house," Fin suggested.

"No, I've only actually had two. The rest of the time I've just kind of been sitting here sulking. I'll be alright to drive."

"Give me a call if you wanna talk. We can meet up and shoot some hoops or something."

"Yeah, I will. Thanks, Fin."

Elliot drove himself home. He made his rounds to check on the children, then settled into bed himself. He laid there alone in the dark, refusing to fall asleep. The bed seemed so empty and cold. Elliot knew he was going to have to get used to the idea of sleeping alone again. This old house just didn't seem the same without her in it. Home just wasn't home without her.


	26. 26 Timing Is Everything

_Playing House_

_(Chapter Twenty Six: Timing is Everything)_

Elliot cursed out loud as he slammed the file cabinet door shut.

"This is bullshit!" he growled in protest.

"Everyone else has been. The only two detectives I have left to send for this training are you and Olivia. I can't send her in her present condition. So you're up to bat," Cragen explained.

"My wife and daughter are both about to give birth! There is some psycho crazy man out there, who may be after Olivia as well and you want to send me to Ohio for some stupid training!"

Olivia raised her head taking notice of the fact that Elliot still referred to her as his wife.

"It is Iowa, and it isn't my choice. It is the national weapons recertification seminar and like I said, they wanted Benson but I couldn't send her nine months pregnant. She'll have to go this fall. Assuming the two of you won't have any more little Stabler miracles on the way."

"I'll be ready," Olivia replied resting her arm across her belly.

"Good. Now that is the attitude to have. You could learn something from her," Cragen said pointing at Olivia as he looked at Elliot. "I realize the timing is bad and I apologize for that. But unless you'd like to take the rest of the afternoon to go out and find another job, you are going and that is final!"

Olivia flinched as Elliot cursed again and pushed his office chair sending it crashing into the wall. He stormed off into the locker room slamming the door behind him. Olivia carefully raised herself up from her and started across the room to go check on him.

"I wouldn't do that," Munch warned before she reached the locker room door. "He is pretty pissed."

"Elliot doesn't scare me. I know he would never hurt me."

"She's right," Fin replied joining into the conversation. "One of us walks in there it is just gonna set him off. She's the only one who can calm him down."

Olivia shrugged her shoulders and pushed open the locker room door. Across the room Elliot was now dressed in his work out clothes and taking his anger out on a punching bag. Olivia said nothing, she just took a seat on the bench and sat quietly as she watched him work out his frustrations on the bag.

"Do you feel better now?" she asked calmly as Elliot's grunts and punches came to a halt.

Elliot looked at her only for a second before firing off a few more punches into the bag.

"He just pisses me off!"

"The situation pisses you off," she corrected. "It isn't his fault."

"Look at you," he replied pointing to her swollen abdomen. "How can they expect me to leave now?"

"Elliot, I'm not due for another month."

"That's good," he replied moving to sit beside her. "At least Mia's on daddy's side."

Olivia smiled as Mia kicked the place where Elliot's palm touched her belly.

"She knows you're talking to her. She always gets so active when she hears her daddy's voice."

"She's daddy's girl," Elliot said with a proud smile.

"Already," Olivia agreed.

"Can you do me a huge favor?" Elliot asked looking into Olivia's eyes.

"Sure."

"Would you stay at the house with the kids? Just until I get back from this trip? I know they'll be alright with the watch outside and I know you can take care of yourself….It would just make me feel better about having to leave."

"I can do that."

"Thanks, Liv."

"Everything will be just fine. Try not to worry. Just go and do whatever it is they want you to do. Get your recertification out of the way and come back home. I'll hold down the fort until you get back."

"I just don't want the kids to be scared. And with Kathleen's due date in a week and a half, I would just really rather you be there with her if something should happen."

"The doctor checked her at her appointment yesterday, she has not even started dilating yet. And first babies usually take longer. It is very common for women to go past their due dates. I'm sure you will be there and back before any of us are needed in the delivery room," she said trying to cheer him up.

"I hope you're right."

"Aren't I always?" she laughed with a smile.

That evening Olivia joined Elliot and the kids for dinner. He explained to them that Liv was going to stay there with them for the next week while he had to go away on a trip for work.

That night Olivia sat on the edge of the bed reading a romance novel as Elliot packed his bag.

"Steamy," he said with a suggestive smile as he read the back cover.

"Hey, some of these writers are very descriptive."

Elliot smiled.

"I thought you were more of a true crime kinda girl."

"I read a little bit of everything. But I really shouldn't be reading this this late."

"I'm sorry I'm keeping you up. I am almost done here, then I'll retire to the couch so you can get some rest."

"You're not bothering me," she said with a smile. "It's just when I read these stories this late they….effect my dreams."

Elliot raised an eyebrow only half sure of what she meant.

"Effect?" he asked clearing his throat.

"Yea," she answered with a shy smile as she closed the book for the night. "It must have something to do with the pregnancy hormones."

"Oh, _effect_?" Elliot repeated finally starting to understand what she had been trying to say.

Olivia laughed.

"They get my mind going and make me have crazy sex dreams."

"Wow," Elliot said kind of shocked she would even tell him about this.

"Did Kathy ever have anything like that when she was pregnant?"

"I'm not sure. If she did she never told me. She wouldn't have told me if she did."

"Why not?"

"I don't know. She didn't really like to talk about sex stuff."

"You were her husband. She didn't discuss these things with you?"

"No, we never really discussed anything having to do with sex."

"You never talked about what the two of you wanted….in the bedroom? Or traded fantasies with each other?"

Elliot shook his head.

"I just thought those things were normal conversation for married people. I mean, how could a girl know what you like if she is afraid to ask?"

"Kathy was….shy. We didn't discuss things and we didn't really explore things sexually. I am the only man she ever slept with."

"Did you even have sex?"

Elliot laughed.

"Occasionally. And when we did, we got pregnant."

"Always missionary?"

"Pretty much."

"Not that there is anything wrong with missionary," she quickly clarified. "But it is fun to experiment with lingerie and different positions, too. How do you know you wont like something if you never try it?"

"I'm sure you get all kinds of crazy ideas from these books," he said turning the book around to look at the lusty picture on the cover.

"Some," she admitted.

"You never told me about any of your fantasies," Elliot replied as she smiled. "But I did enjoy the super sexy and wild birthday sex."

Olivia smiled.

"So did I," she said rubbing her hands over her belly.

"I know we're not married anymore. But you can still talk to me. You can tell me anything," he said placing his hand over hers and squeezing it as he smiled at her. "Even your fantasies," he joked as he stood from the bed.

Elliot walked across the room and shut off the light as he made his way into the hallway.

"Good night, El."

"Good night, Olivia."

She settled in against the pillow and pulled the sheet up against her face. She drew in a deep breath and could smell his cologne on the bed sheets.

"Elliot," she said softly in the stillness.

"Yes?" he asked returning to her side and kneeling to look at her.

"I never told you about my fantasy, because _you_ were my fantasy."

Elliot couldn't help but smile at her confession.

"I'd had this crush on you since we'd first met. Not crazy stalker type crush, I just wondered sometimes what we would be like….together."

"Yea, me too," he admitted.

"Really?" she asked with a shy smile as he sat down beside her.

"Oh yea. You were smart and sexy and beautiful. You were funny as hell and the best damn cop I'd ever seen. You were my partner and best friend and we were closer than I had ever been with anyone else, including my wife. You were off limits, and that made me want you even more."

"Not much of a fantasy anymore, huh?" she asked.

"It is different now."

"It isn't hot sex now. It responsibilities and obligations."

"Before it was fantasizing about hot sex with a woman I wasn't allowed to have," he clarified. "Now it is dreaming of raising a family and making a life with the only woman I will ever love. Making love to her, as my wife and holding her every night, sleeping beside her, and growing old together. That is all I want, Liv."

The room was quiet for a moment and through the darkness he could tell she was crying.

"I love you, Olivia. You and these kids are my entire world. I love you more than I have ever loved any woman in my life and I know that I will never love anyone else the way that I love you. I understand that you need time, so I will give that to you. Just know that no matter how long it takes or what you decide, I am always going to love you."

Elliot listened as she whispered softly, "I love you , too."

"And as long as it takes, I will wait for you."

Elliot stood once more and kissed the top of her head, then Olivia watched as he disappeared down the hallway.

The next morning the kids had already left for school when it came time for Elliot to head to the airport. Olivia drove him and waited with him at the gate until they began loading the plane.

"I have flown probably a hundred times and planes still freak me out," she said staring out the large glass window at the runway. "It usually takes me a handful of Valium and two or three of those miniature bottles of vodka before I can relax."

"Relax? That would be enough to knock out a horse for an eighteen hour flight to Hong Kong."

"Like I said, I am not good with flying."

Elliot smiled.

"Why I do believe I have found your kryptonite, Superman."

"It isn't funny. There are millions of people who have a fear of flying. And I prefer Batman."

"You do, huh? Well, Batman flies, too."

"More of a glide, really. He spends most of his time hanging out in the Bat cave and cruising the streets of Gotham City trying to pick up chicks in the Bat mobile. No super hero has a cooler car. And black is very sexy."

Elliot laughed, a little surprised that she knew her superheroes' at all.

"What about Spiderman?"

"Na," she replied.

"Oh come on, the man can scale buildings and shoot spider webs from his fists."

"Yea, I think it's the web thing that kind of creeps me out.'

They laughed together.

"I have always been partial to Superman, myself."

"Why is that?" she asked expecting some silly answer.

"Well, because all of these other superheroes are just regular people who create a an alter ego to try and save the world from injustice. Superman _is _the super hero, he fights for justice while trying to live a normal life. The man knows who he is and uses it for a good cause. He didn't go out and create a false identity to use while he runs around kicking bad guy ass. You have to admit that is pretty amazing."

Olivia smiled at the fact that they were having this detailed a conversation over a bunch of fictional characters. And the fact that in under a minute Elliot had managed to work up a complete profile on Superman.

"I guess I never really thought of it that way before," she admitted.

They walked slowly toward the gate as a woman's voice announced his flight number over the loud speaker.

"That's me," Elliot said slipping the strap of his laptop case over his shoulder.

"Call me when you land….so I know you made it safe."

"I will," he replied as a smile slowly crossed his face.

"And be careful."

"It's just a week," Elliot said with a nod.

"I know, but these planes are so dangerous."

He hugged her then turned to go. Olivia watched as he pulled his boarding pass from the pocket of his suit jacket then turned and walked back to her.

"There is something I need to say. I know it isn't exactly what you want to hear right now, but it has been on my mind for months and I just really need to say it."

"Okay," she replied looking a little worried.

Elliot pulled a small velvet box from the pocket where he had kept the plane ticket.

"I've been carrying this around for six weeks, trying to find the perfect moment. I guess this one is as good as any," he replied dropping to one knee as he opened the box and offered her the diamond inside.

Olivia stood there speechless as a crowd began to gather. Elliot watched as tears welled up in her eyes.

"Liv, I know that you need time. And I know that you are not ready to take this step just yet. But I want you to know that you are the only one I will ever want. I love you with all of my heart. You are the best part of me. You are what has kept me going all of these years and I don't know where I would be if I didn't have you. I wouldn't want to know. I want to spend the rest of my life with you, as husband and wife. It doesn't have to be now, it doesn't even have to be this year. But I know that in this lifetime I want to marry you. And I want to get on this plane knowing that if God decides it is my time to go and I don't get to come back home to you, you knew just how much I love you. Olivia Dawn Stabler, will you marry me? Again?"

"El," she breathed softly as she looked at the strangers around them.

"Someday," he whispered as he stared into her eyes. "Whenever you decide you are ready. I will wait for you. And when the time is right for you, say you will be my wife. Just think about it. You and me and Mia and the kids. We make a pretty great family, Liv. And that family just isn't the same without you in it. I need you. I love you. Like I have never loved anyone else before."

Olivia wiped a tear from her cheek and drew a deep breath as she nodded her head in agreement, unable to speak.

"I love you," she finally managed to get out as Elliot stood and she hugged him tight.

"I love you too, baby." He said with a proud smile as the strangers around them began to applaud.

Elliot held up the little box for her to see once more.

Olivia pressed her lips together as he pulled the ring out and slipped it onto her finger, an even bigger and more beautiful diamond than he had given her the last time they were married.

"You hold on to this for me, okay?" he asked with a smile. "And when I get back we can start working on things. Slowly. I don't care if it takes years, you are the one I want to be with. I'm alright with a long engagement, as it is you walking down the aisle to me in the end."

Olivia hugged him again.

"Come home safe to me. We will all be waiting here for you," she said softly as she smoothed her hands over her belly.

Elliot knelt once more to kiss her belly, then kissed his fiancée.

"I love you baby doll," he said kissing her tenderly once more.

"I love you too," she replied brushing the tip of her nose against his and smiling as she leaned in to kiss him again.

Olivia waved to him from the big window as she watched the plane take off.

She spent the next few hours in a daydream, sitting at her desk staring at the ring on her left hand and thinking about the man who had claimed her for his own. Her man. Her ex-husband and soon to be husband once more.

She thought about the details of their first wedding, how perfect and beautiful everything was and how happy everyone seemed. Then she though about how badly it hurt her to uphold her end of the agreement and sign those divorce papers. She knew then that she was in love with him and it killed her to let him go, but she was a woman of her word.

"What's this?" Fin asked grasping her hand to admire the ring. "He finally talked you into it, huh?"

Olivia smiled shyly and folded her arms in front of her.

"We are going to take things slow."

Fin smiled.

"Good for you. He has been crazy about you forever. And he's been moping around here kicking himself for pushing you away. That man loves you more than I have ever known a man to love a woman. All he wants is to spend his life making you happy."

"I love him, too. And I want to be with him, there was never a time that I didn't. I just don't want to rush into something and it end up falling apart because we jumped in over our heads. Our kids need a secure future. All of our kids. We can't take a gamble with this, we have to be sure."

"I think he is sure," Fin said turning the ring under the light to watch it sparkle. "I think if any couple can make it, it is the two of you. You belong together."

"Do you really think so?"

"I do," Fin replied with a confident nod. "Congratulations."

"Thanks, Fin. For being such a good friend and a shoulder for us both to lean on."

"I'm here anytime you need me."

That evening after Elliot called Olivia to check on the kids and tell her how much he loved and missed her, they decided to keep the new engagement a secret from the kids until Elliot could be there with her to make the announcement.

Three nights later, Kathleen woke Olivia up in the middle of the night to tell her that something didn't feel right. After a while she began to have contractions, they started off slow then began to grow closer together.

"When can we go to the hospital, Liv?" she asked with pain in her eyes.

"The doctor said when they are five minutes apart or your water breaks. She said you have not reached your due date yet and there is still a good chance that the contractions could stop and you might not actually be in labor."

"I wish they would stop," she whined and Olivia felt so horrible for her.

"I know it hurts, honey. It just meant that you are getting closer to time to have the baby. Before long it will all be over."

"That's what I'm afraid of," Kathleen admitted with tears in her eyes.

Olivia hugged the girl tight. She paced the floor the rest of the night timing contractions with Kathleen, nervously waiting until they were close enough together to take the girl to the hospital for delivery. At one point they had gotten down to seven minutes apart, then just seemed to fade away.

When morning came, Olivia awoke to find Kathleen asleep in the bed beside her. She got up and moved to the kitchen to get breakfast ready for the other kids before school.

"How is Kathleen doing?" Maureen asked in her motherly way.

"She is resting now. She's sleeping pretty good, I don't want to wake her. She was up most of the night."

"But it still isn't time?"

"Not just yet. But she is exhausted," Olivia said scribbling out a note and handing it over to Maureen. "Can you take this in when you drop the twins off? I'll call the school and let them know I am keeping her home. I am going to try to get her in to see the doctor today and see if she has made any progress or if they can tell how close she is to actual labor."

"My biology teacher said it takes some women days to give birth."

"Days?" Olivia asked feeling a little mortified, herself.

"I hope she at least holds out until dad gets home. He will be here in two days."

"I know your father wants to be here for her. He called me every hour on the hour last night to check on her. But this baby will come when it is ready to come. And there isn't much any of us can do to hold it off."

"I guess you're right," Maureen replied downing the last of her coffee.

"I am going to stay home with her today. Hopefully we can both get some rest."

"I'll have my phone on vibrate, call me if anything happens."

"I will, I promise."

Olivia yawned as she watched Maureen's car back out of the driveway. She was wore out, but now that she was awake, Mia was convinced it was time to eat. She grabbed a quick bowl of cereal and some fresh fruit as she called Kathleen's school to report her absence. Then headed back to Elliot's king sized bed to sleep beside her daughter.

That afternoon, Olivia took Kathleen into the doctor's office for a last minute check up. The doctor checked her and said that the baby was in position and ready to go. She said that Kathleen had now dilated to a two, but her water hadn't broken and that she could have the baby at any time. The doctor scheduled her for another appointment in a few days to track her progress.

Feeling miserable, Kathleen just wanted to go home and sleep. Olivia drove them home and started dinner while Kathleen laid down for a nap. Olivia could tell that she was wore out and ready for it all to be over. After dinner, Olivia gave Eli a bath and helped the twins.

After tucking everyone into bed for the night, she called her soon to be husband.

"Hey pretty," Elliot answered on the second ring. "Is everything okay?"

"So far, so good," Olivia replied as she settled into Elliot's side of the bed.

"How's my girl?"

"She is holding up. The doctor said the baby is in position and she had dilated to a two. Her water hasn't broke yet, but she could go at any time. She has another appointment in a few days to see if anything has changed."

"I was talking about you," he said with a tired laugh.

Olivia smiled.

"I'm okay. Tired, but I'm alright. It has been a long 24 hours!"

"I'll bet. Tell Kathleen to hang in there. It will all be over soon. I will be home in two days, hopefully she can wait that long."

"She is trying to. I can tell that she doesn't want to have this baby without you there. I went ahead and pulled her out of school. I figured she should probably rest as much as she could before so she isn't so tired during labor."

"That sounds like a good plan. I don't know much about labor, though."

"Me either. I feel so bad for her. She is scared and in pain and I just wish I had already gone through this so that maybe I could help her more."

"Yet another reason why kids should not be having kids."

"I know, El. But she really needs our support now more than ever."

"I am so glad that she has you there with her. I feel bad that she really needs me and I am so far away."

"She knows you would be here if you could."

"Have you had any trouble?"

"No, the kids have been great."

"Any news about Parker?"

"Nothing. Not a sign of him. I am beginning to think this man just fell off the face of the earth."

"Or ran off to start another crime spree."

"Well he isn't very original, so if he did it wont be long before his pattern emerges and we snag him again."

"True. It's getting late there. I'd better let you go so you can get some rest."

"I'm not tired," Olivia yawned into the phone. "Well, maybe a little. But it's good to hear your voice."

"It's good to hear yours too sweetheart. And I cant wait to come home so that we can tell the kids our little secret."

Olivia smiled.

"About that, Fin kind of knows."

"Kind of?"

"I wore my ring at work the other day and he was the only one who seemed to notice. He said congratulations."

"Have you thought about things?"

"I am still thinking," she said with a smile.

"I know, I'm sorry. I'll stop pushing. I promised you time and I can give you that. You have promised to marry me, that's a hell of a start. I think I can settle for that for now."

"Settle, huh?"

"You know what I mean."

"Yes, I do."

"Before we get off here, let me talk to Mia."

"What?"

"Just hold the phone to your belly, I want to tell my daughter goodnight."

"Okay," Olivia laughed. "But I am not sure she'll be able to hear you."

She moved the sheet down over her waist and raised her gown to place the receiver against her bare belly. Things were still for a moment then Olivia began to laugh in amazement as Mia reacted to her daddy's voice.

"She is kicking like crazy! What did you say to her?"

"I told her that daddy loved her. And that she should be a good girl for mommy while I'm away. Oh, and she isn't allowed to date until she is thirty."

Olivia laughed again as she felt a kick in the rib cage.

"I think she is protesting."

"Sorry I got her all stirred up."

"She'll settle down soon. She is usually sound asleep by now."

"So are you," Elliot replied. "Goodnight baby, I love you."

"I love you, too. Goodnight, El."

And with that, Olivia hung up the phone and settled in for the night. The next day, Kathleen seemed to feel better. She sat at the table doing homework while Olivia worked from her laptop across the room.

Olivia fixed them an early lunch around eleven and after a nap and some more homework, Kathleen even stood in the kitchen to help make dinner. That evening Kathleen was standing in the bathroom blow drying her hair after a shower when she began having the all too familiar pains once more.

Olivia helped her time them for a couple of hours, before they seemed to be one right on top the other. She called Maureen to come sit with the other children and carried Kathleen's bag as she helped the girl to the car.

Olivia called Elliot to tell him they were on their way to the hospital. She still wasn't sure if they would admit Kathleen since her water hadn't broke, so she told Elliot she would call him back and let her know what they decided to do.

As soon as he got the word that Kathleen was infact being admitted, Elliot began the search to a flight back home. Two hours later he called Olivia to tell her that he was heading home on a red eye and would be there as soon as he could.

The sun was just beginning to rise as Elliot climbed from the cab and dashed across the hospital parking lot. He took the elevator to the labor and delivery floor and ran down the hallway. Just on the other side of two large double doors he saw Olivia standing there in tears.

"What happened?" He asked as his heart sank in his chest.

"She had the baby about half an hour ago. They are getting her cleaned up now."

"Is everything okay? Is Kathleen alright?"

Olivia nodded through her tears.

"She did really good," she sobbed as he wrapped her in his arms and he kissed her.

"Liv, are you okay."

"Yea, I'm good. I just….I can't help it."

"Were you in there with her?"

"Holding her hand through the entire thing. They let me cut the cord."

She locked her fingers in Elliot's and led him down the hall to the nursery window.

"There," she said pointing to an infant with a head full of blonde fuzz. "Nine pounds, eleven ounces. Almost ten pounds," she laughed nervously. "The doctor wanted to do an emergency cesarean, but Kathleen wouldn't give up. She pushed for three hours."

Elliot placed his palms against the glass to stare at the baby. He laid his forehead against the window fighting off tears of his own.

"This is your grandson," she whispered softly trying hard not to fall completely apart.

Elliot was quiet for a few moments and she could see tears as they slid down his face.

"How is Kathleen?" he breathed in a hoarse whisper.

"The doctor said she is doing fine."

"And the baby?"

"A perfectly healthy little boy," she said as she placed her hand against the glass.

"Has Kathleen seen him?" he asked turning his head to look at her.

"For a few moments. Right after he was born the doctor handed him to her."

"How did she react?"

"She cried, El. How do you think she reacted. She was holding her son for the first and probably the last time. Then she handed him over to the nurse and they brought him out here. I sat with her for a little while and just held her while she cried."

"She's just a kid, Liv."

"I know."

"She is in no way prepared to raise a child."

"I know that, too."

"She has already picked out the perfect family for this little guy. He will be just fine," Elliot said trying hard to convince himself.

Olivia drew a deep breath and exhaled. She was quiet for a moment as she stared at the baby.

"How can we make her do this?" she asked softly as Elliot raised his head once more.

"What are you talking about?"

"Giving up her baby, Elliot. That is what I am talking about."

"Olivia, we are not keeping this baby! She is not even eighteen yet. She is in high school…."

"On the honor roll!"

"In high school! She has not even started college yet! She doesn't have a job! The father is….God knows where! She can't take care of this child."

"Not if we keep telling her that. How would you feel? If we spent almost ten months getting to know Mia, then someone came along and said you couldn't keep her? That they found another home for your child and some strangers were going to raise your daughter?"

"I am a grown man! I finished school and got a job! I support my children! There is a difference!"

"And she can too if we just help her! If we give her a little support….she might be a wonderful mother to that child if you'd just give her the chance."

Elliot stood there shaking his head in protest.

"We had an agreement."

"Elliot, if you force her to do this, you are going to lose her. She is going to lock all of her emotions up inside herself and she is going to resent you for it."

"If I let her take this baby home and she gives up her life and her dreams….If I allow this and it ruins her life, I will resent myself!"

"And if you give her the chance and she can't do it, then it would be her choice. And at least she would know that she did everything she could, that she tried. This is the hardest thing she will ever have to face. And she is being so strong. Trying so hard to make daddy proud, Elliot. So hard and it is killing her inside! But she doesn't dare say anything in fear of disappointing you again."

Elliot stood quiet for a few moments as Olivia wiped her eyes and stared at the newborn.

"She doesn't even have anything. No clothes or bottles, no diapers, no crib."

"She can use mine," Olivia said softly as she stared into the window at the baby.

Elliot raised his head to afraid of what she was trying to tell him.

"What about Mia?"

Olivia laid her head against his shoulder and hugged his arm.

"Mia only needs one crib if we are all living in the same house," she replied softly staring at him with her big brown eyes. Elliot could tell this was her polite way of making a deal with him.

He looked back at the baby boy once more.

"She will finish school."

"Of course," Olivia agreed.

"And go to college."

"Not debatable."

Elliot turned to stare into Olivia's eyes once more as she smiled and kissed him.

"Thank you," she whispered softly.

"You are right, I could never give up one of my children. How could I expect Kathleen to give up hers? But some changes will be made. You and I already have a baby to raise. If she chooses to keep him, she will be the parent of this child."

Olivia hugged his arm adoringly as Elliot wrapped his arms tight around her.

"Hmm," she said with a soft laugh.

"What?" he asked.

"Who would have thought that I'd be a grandmother, before I became a mother?"

Elliot chuckled and kissed the side of her neck.

"I love you."

"I love you, too."

"And this is about to be an animal house. You know that, right? Life as we know it is over. We will never sleep again!"

"Not for the first several months anyway," she agreed.

"Two newborns. Twice the clothes, twice the diapers and twice the formula."

Olivia smiled.

"Twice the smiles, twice the giggles and twice the first steps." She turned to brush her nose against his and kissed him tenderly. "You should go see Kathleen and tell her the good news."

"Aren't you coming?"

"I'll be in there in a bit. I'm going to go get you some coffee and find some food for your other daughter," she said pointing at her belly, "I think the two of you need a little time alone."

Elliot smiled at her and slipped his fingers between hers once more, this time noticing she was wearing her engagement ring.

He watched her disappear into the elevator, then drew a deep breath and headed down the hall to his daughter's hospital room.

"Knock, knock," he said softly entering the room with a vase of roses he'd bought from a machine down the hall.

"Daddy," Kathleen said in excitement as she sat up and reached out to hug him.

"I am so sorry, baby. I tried to get back here in time."

"It's okay. I know you tried. And Liv was here."

Elliot smiled.

"She has really been here for you guys a lot lately, huh?"

"She has always been here for us dad. Especially since mom passed away."

"I'm thankful for that. I know there have been so many times that you have needed your mother….a woman to talk to. I'm afraid there are some things dear old dad just isn't much help with."

Kathleen settled against her pillow and Elliot could tell she was exhausted.

"I wont keep you long, baby. I know you are tired. But I thought it was important that we talked about this now, rather than later."

Kathleen turned her head toward the window in an attempt to keep Elliot from seeing her cry.

"Baby…" he began and she cut him off.

"I know. And I know why this is best," she sobbed. "But it still hurts so much."

Elliot pulled up a chair beside her bed and knelt to her level.

"Look at me," he said as she stared at him with her sad blue eyes. "Your future is the most important thing right now. Finishing school and going to college. Making your dreams come true. Promise me you will never give up on that."

Kathleen looked confused.

"I promise," she whispered.

"You will stay at the house with us."

She tipped her unsure of what he meant.

"You will finish high school. No excuses!"

"I will," she agreed.

"After high school you and the baby will live at home with us…"

Kathleen began to breathe rapidly and started to cry again.

"You will go to college!"

"Yes, sir," she agreed with a nod.

"You'll get a part time job to help with the baby expenses while you are living at home. I won't let you ruin your future. It is not just about you anymore Kathleen. If you keep this baby, you have to think about what is best for him. And what is best for him is you graduating college so you can get a good career and give him all of the things he wants and needs. This is your child. Olivia and I will help out when we can, but he is your responsibility. You get up with him at night. You are on diaper duty. We are giving you the chance to give motherhood a try. If you try this and decide that it isn't what is right for you, then we can still consider adoption resources if you want. This is up to you. But those are the conditions."

Kathleen smiled through her tears.

"Thank you daddy," she said softly as she hugged him tight.

She smiled as Olivia walked back into the room.

"Dad, can I talk to Olivia alone for a moment?"

Elliot looked at Kathleen, then looked back at Olivia.

"Girl stuff," Kathleen insisted.

"Alright, but just for a few minutes. Then you need to get some rest. I'm gonna take Liv home to get some sleep as well. Maureen is gonna come back up here and sit with you. We'll bring the other kids by after school to meet their new nephew."

"Okay," Kathleen said as Elliot leaned in and kissed her.

"I love you, baby."

"I love you too, dad."

"And Kathleen," Elliot said turning to look back at her, "I am so proud of you. Mom would be, too. He is beautiful, honey."

"Bye dad," she said with tears in her eyes as she waved to him.

"What's up kiddo?" Olivia asked sitting on the edge of her bed. "Is there anything special you want me to bring you from home?"

"No, I just wanted to thank you. For being here with me, for going in there with me. And for talking to dad."

Olivia tipped her head and blinked.

"Come on, Liv. I know my father well enough to know that when he had his mind made up there is no use in even trying. He never would have let me keep the baby if you hadn't talked him into it."

Olivia smiled and tucked a piece of blonde hair behind the girl's ear.

"Everyone deserves a chance. I know that you have it in you to be an amazing mother to that little boy."

"I don't know much about babies."

"But you know what it takes to be a good mom. You had an amazing mother and your dad is right, she would have been so proud of you today."

Kathleen smiled and kissed Olivia on the cheek.

"I've had two amazing mothers," she said with a smile.

"Get some rest, kid," Olivia said standing and kissing the tip of her nose. "I love you. And if you think of anything that you want….pizza or a cheeseburger," Olivia paused and they both laughed. "Seriously though, if you need me baby just call me. And I will bring you some dinner because hospital food is nasty and you are going to need your strength to take care of that beautiful grandson of mine."

Elliot was standing in front of the window talking baby talk to the little boy when Olivia walked out of Kathleen's room.

"I see the two of you are getting acquainted."

"I think he looks like me."

Olivia smiled.

"I think he looks like her."

"He's gonna need a name," Elliot said tapping gently on the glass.

"He already has one," she replied and Elliot turned around to look at her.

"She told you his name?"

"She did."

"Well?"

Olivia smiled as she peered down at the baby boy.

"Isaiah Elliot Stabler. After his grandfather."

"That's a good name," he said smiling down at the baby.

"I think it fits him perfectly. And he has those Stabler blues."

"He does?"

"Yea, that was the first thing I noticed when they handed him to me after he was born. That and the fact that he was a boy of course."

"A big boy."

"A big, beautiful, healthy boy. I have got to bring my camera when we come back this afternoon and get some pictures to show off at work."

"I am not quite sure how all of this is going to work out, but I know that together you and I can handle anything. I am so thankful to have you by my side. I love you so much."

"I love you, too. Hey, how did you do on your certification?"

Elliot laughed.

"That bad, huh?"

"Let's just say I will be retaking it again with you this fall."

"Oh, no! How did you score?"

"I don't know. I was supposed to be there today to finish up the test and I left to come back here and be with Kathleen. Cragen will be pissed, but he'll get over it eventually."

"I am sure he'll understand."

"I'm not to worried about it. He won't really fire me and this is where I needed to be."

"I'll bet you are exhausted."

"I am. And you are, too. I can tell. Who wouldn't be after being up two nights in a row and helping to deliver a baby."

"I just held her hand and cut the cord. Kathleen and the doctors did all of the work."

Elliot slipped his arms around her waist and gazed lovingly into her eyes.

"I have missed you so much."

Olivia smiled back at him.

"I've missed you, too."

He brushed a piece of hair from her eyes and kissed her once more.

"What do you say we go home?" he asked tracing his thumb over her bottom lip. "These arms have been dying to hold you."

"I think that sounds like a wonderful idea," she said as he wrapped her tight in his arms and hugged her. "Let's go home."


	27. 27 Learning As We Go

_Playing House_

_(Chapter Twenty Seven: Learning As We Go)_

Olivia laid in bed listening to her future husband snore beside her. Downstairs, Kathleen paced the floor with her screaming infant unsure of how to soothe him. Liv reached down and moved Elliot's arm from around her and slipped from the bed. She made her way to the bathroom and slipped on her robe.

Elliot had forbidden Olivia from getting up with Isaiah during the night, insisting that this was Kathleen's responsibility and there was only one way she would learn to care for the baby. But Olivia had never been one to sit around and let someone else tell her what to do….or not to do for that matter. Besides, she herself would be a first time mother soon and needed all of the practice she could get before Mia arrived.

She slipped out of the bedroom, closing the door behind her and making her way into the kitchen. There she heated water in the microwave and mixed Isaiah a bottle. She pulled the mug of hot water from the microwave and dropped in a tea bag, then grabbed the bottle from the counter and headed down the stairs to help her daughter.

"Liv, I'm sorry he woke you. I can't get him to stop crying. He isn't wet and he wont take the bottle, I don't know what's wrong."

"It's alright. You are both new at this, it's gonna take a little while to get used to. Why don't you take a little break and let grandma take him for a few minutes. I brought you some mint tea," she said reaching for the little boy.

"I'm not good at this," the girl said as she sat on the sofa and picked up the mug. "What if I made a mistake?"

"Shhh," Olivia said softly, bouncing the baby gently in her arms as she settled into the rocking chair. "He is fine, honey. Babies cry. Sometimes they don't even know what is wrong. That doesn't mean that you are not a good mother."

Kathleen watched as she rocked the chair slowly and hummed to Isaiah.

"Did you try nursing him?"

"I tried. But it really hurts and he doesn't want to latch on. I can't get him to eat."

"He'll eat if he is hungry. Maybe he isn't sure what he wants," she whispered as she kissed her grandson's forehead.

The baby whimpered a bit and began to fuss once more.

"My goodness. Tell grandma about it," she whispered softly as the baby boy stared up at her with little tears in his blue eyes.

Olivia picked up the bottle of formula and offered it to him. Kathleen watched as the baby turned away at first, then accepted the bottle and began to drink from it.

"You're a miracle worker," Kathleen sighed at the sudden quietness as she looked at Olivia with tired eyes.

"The formula is a little heavier, so he should be able to go a little longer between feedings. But you should still probably pump. If it hurts you to nurse him and he is taking the bottle good, you could pump the breast milk and give it to him in the bottle. That might take a little of the stress off you."

"Wont dad get mad if he finds out you were down here helping me in the middle of the night?"

Olivia smiled.

"You let me handle your father," she said with a laugh. "I am not afraid of him."

Kathleen smiled.

"I think you're the one who wears the pants in this relationship."

"It isn't really like that. Your dad and I always try to work things out together. A relationship is a partnership and it takes both people to make it work. Neither one of us makes all of the decisions. He is just worried that if we help out too much with the baby you wont learn to care for him on your own."

Kathleen stared at her and Olivia smiled again.

"But you are doing an amazing job and are definitely holding up your end of the deal. It has been a long six days and you have barely gotten any sleep. I don't mind helping you out."

"Thanks, Liv. You are really good with him." Olivia laughed a little as she stared down at the baby in her arms.

"I don't really know much about babies either. I guess the three of us are kind of learning as we go."

"I'll bet you can't wait for Mia to get here."

"I'm ready to finally be able to hold my little girl and to meet the person who has been kicking the crap out of my ribs for the last nine months. And I am so ready to not be pregnant anymore."

Kathleen laughed.

"I know that feeling. The last few weeks are so exhausting. Do you think it is going to be crazy with two babies in the house?"

"It very well could be."

"Do you think that every time one cries, the other will cry too? Then no one would ever get any sleep at night."

"Maureen came to me this morning with an idea. I didn't know if this was something you would be interested in or not. She thought if you wanted to you and Isaiah could move into the apartment over the garage. That would give you a little more privacy and it would be like having your own place."

"Where would Maureen stay?"

"Well, I talked to your dad about it. And he said that if this is what you want to do, he and Dickie could help get your guys moved in. We would be right here any time you need us. If this is something that you are interested in, we would probably move down here and set up the second bedroom as a nursery for Mia and Maureen would take our room. What do you think?"

"I like the idea. I guess I'm just a little nervous about being completely alone with him."

"Baby, we are right here if you need anything at any time. Just call or text, me or dad or Maureen and we will be right there. Kathleen, you don't have to do this if you don't want to. I don't want you to feel like we are trying to push you out."

Kathleen took a deep breath and smiled.

"I think it is a good idea. Especially once Mia is here."

Olivia sat the bottle on the end table beside the sofa and moved Isaiah to her shoulder to burp him.

"How are you doing with your school work?"

Kathleen groaned.

"I have not even started."

"You don't want to fall behind. That could keep you from graduating on time. You know how important that is."

"Yeah. It just seems like every time I sit down with a book and start to study, he starts crying and needs to be fed or changed. Or he just wants to be held and wont let me put him down."

"I'll tell you what….since I am desk bound I no longer work the overtime hours your dad and the others do. I am usually home by five or six o'clock. You take care of Isaiah during the day and study when you get the chance. And if you can help me with dinner when I get home, I will watch the baby for you for a couple of hours every night so that you can focus on your school work."

"Really? That would be great."

"Then I'll be home for a while in a few weeks after I have Mia and I can help out with him during the day and allow you some study time. We will work something out."

"Thanks."

"I think you should get this little man back into bed and try to get some rest while he sleeps," she said kissing her grand baby once more and handing him back to his mother.

"Thanks again for your help tonight."

"No problem, sweetheart," she replied as she kissed the top of the girl's head.

"Kathleen?"

"Yeah?"

"He didn't wake me up. I couldn't sleep. Your dad is passed out snoring and no one else seemed to even notice him crying, try not to worry so much, you are doing a great job."

"Good night, Liv."

"Good night, baby," Olivia replied as she headed back upstairs to her own bed.

The next morning Olivia woke up later than usual. She rolled over in the now empty bed as she looked over at the alarm clock.

"Crap," she groaned as she climbed from the bed and made her way to the bathroom. "It's a good thing you woke mommy up Mia, daddy let me oversleep," she said rubbing her belly. "I know, I know. It is time for breakfast."

Olivia dressed quickly and headed into the kitchen where the kids rushed out the door on their way to school.

"You shut off my alarm," she said as she took a seat at the bar and he handed her a cup of hot tea.

"I figured you could use the rest after being up last night with the baby," he replied with a sly smile as she rolled her eyes up to look at him. "I wouldn't have let you be late for work."

"I couldn't sleep and I figured she could use a little help. Isaiah wouldn't quit crying and she never would have gotten any sleep."

"Did it work?"

"Like a charm. He just wanted his grandma to give him a bottle. Then he went right back to sleep. Don't look at me like that. You have to keep in mind that she is still a kid herself, Elliot. And I happen to think that she is doing an amazing job. He is one week old today and I'll bet she hasn't slept more than six hours all week. She's a trooper. I didn't realize you woke up."

"I didn't," he said with a smile.

Olivia laughed.

"You set me up," she said pointing at him as she took a drink of her tea. "You tricked me into telling on myself."

Elliot grinned again and laughed.

"I knew you couldn't resist getting up to help with him. Kathleen came up for a cup of coffee earlier and I asked her about her school work. She mentioned the two of you worked out a deal."

"Don't be upset. I just thought it might help her get caught up and stay on track with school."

"I'm not upset. I think it's a great idea. As long as you feel up to it. She really looks up to you and I couldn't think of a better role model."

Olivia smiled.

"Really?"

"Really," he replied as he kissed the tip of her nose. "Now, what would miss Mia like for breakfast?"

"Umm…..an omelet with cheese, bacon and hot sauce."

"Hot sauce? Liv, it is seven o'clock in the morning."

"Hey, Mia is a girl who knows what she wants."

They both laughed.

"And she wants hot sauce on her eggs."

"She does," Olivia agreed.

"Anything for my baby," he replied leaning forward to steal a kiss.

They sat together at the table and shared breakfast.

"Are you getting nervous?" Olivia asked.

"About what?"

"About the fact that in a few weeks _our_ baby will be here. Then it will be us up all night and on diaper duty twenty four hours a day."

"I've been thinking…."

" 'Bout what?" she asked taking another bite of her breakfast.

"About us. I know I said I wouldn't push you…."

Olivia laid down her fork and crossed her arms in front of her on the table.

"I've just been thinking, now that we have the family back together…."

"Maybe we should get married before Mia is born," Olivia said finishing his sentence.

"Exactly," Elliot said with a smile.

Olivia smiled.

"I have actually been thinking the same thing."

"So, if my calculations are right we have about….six weeks to plan and carry out a wedding," he said smoothing his hands over her belly.

Olivia laughed.

"Assuming our daughter cooperates with daddy's schedule."

"I love you so much," Elliot said as he kissed her tenderly. "And I cannot wait to be your husband again," he replied turning her engagement ring around with his fingertip. "You are my soul mate," he confessed as he stared into her eyes and she smiled a shy smile at him, "my one true love. And I can't to spend the rest of my life with you."

"Aww," she said with a smile as she twisted his tie in her fingers and pressed her mouth to his. "And I'm excited to finally be able to call you my husband. Well, for real."

"And if I am never anything else as long as I live, I am happy being their father," he said pressing his hand against her belly to feel Mia kick, "and your husband."

"My man," she said with a playful giggle as she wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him passionately.

"You know we might have enough time to head back to the bedroom real quick," he said looking at his watch.

"El, I am almost nine months pregnant….I don't do anything really quick," she replied standing from her chair and handing him the car keys. "We are going to be late for work," she said she whispered seductively as she nipped at his ear and kissed his cheek.


	28. 28 'Til Death Do Us Part

**_AUTHOR'S Note: I am sorry it has taken me so long to update. I have just been super busy with school and work and have struggled with update ideas. Also, the only place I have internet access right now is at work and I cannot post updates from there. I will try not to go this long between updates anymore. Thank you all for being so patient with me! This one if for all of my loyal readers, without you guys I would just be writing stories to myself. You all ROCK!_**

**_- Detective Olivia Stabler -_**

_Playing House_

_(Chapter Twenty Eight: 'Til Death Do Us Part)_

"This is just depressing," Olivia said looking around the room as she and Casey entered the bridal store.

"Why is it depressing? This is your wedding dress. For your big day. It should be exciting."

"It is. But dress shopping was a lot more fun the first time around. Before I gained almost thirty pounds," she replied smoothing her hands over her baby bump.

"But it was for a good cause," Casey said with a laugh.

"I don't even know if they make maternity wedding gowns."

"A lot of women get married while they are pregnant. I am sure they have something that will be perfect."

"Case, most women get married before they are nine months along. While they still fit into wedding dresses."

"Well, we won't find anything if we don't look."

"I know. I just have three weeks left until the wedding and so far I have no dress, no dresses for the girls and still have to decide on the menu. So the way things sit, I have a venue for the reception, a preacher, a cake and a group of naked women at my wedding."

"Well, I'm sure male guests won't mind."

"Careful, now. Those naked women include my daughters, my big pregnant self and you my love."

Casey laughed.

"Don't give up. It will all come together. Try not to get too stressed out over it all. We will get it."

"I'm just so tired," Olivia groaned as she flipped through a dozen more wedding dresses that seemed to look exactly like every other dress she'd seen.

"Some of these are really pretty."

"They are. But they are not really what I am looking for," Olivia replied. "To be completely honest, I don't really know what I am looking for. But I am sure I will know it when I see it."

"Your dress before was gorgeous."

"I loved that dress. I just happened to stumble across it on a rack in the back of the bridal shop."

"It was really pretty."

"Thank you. I also saved six hundred dollars because it was missing a couple of sequins."

"I didn't notice that."

Olivia smiled in accomplishment.

"Precisely. But I'm not really seeing anything that really speaks to me here. Do you see anything you like, maid of honor?"

"I thought we were going to shop with the girls later this week."

"We are. But I am open to suggestions. I was thinking you and I could come up with a couple of ideas and then you and the girls could choose from those."

"So kind of a pre-approved shopping session?"

"Anything to make this easier."

"Easier?"

Olivia stopped and stared at her.

"Obviously you have never been clothes shopping with three teenaged girls. If we don't narrow the field a little it is going to take forever, we could have a war on our hands and God only knows what kind of dress we will end up with."

"Ahh, sneaky."

"Just help me look. Find something you like….a few something's. We can decide on colors as we go along."

"So where did you decide to have the wedding?" Casey asked combing through another rack of bridesmaid dresses.

"Well, we both liked the country club we used the last time, so we decided to have it there again. It was pretty and spacious and photographed really well."

"It was perfect. If I ever get married…..and that is a really BIG if…..I would probably consider using that as my venue as well."

"Glad I could help," Olivia said sarcastically.

"What do you think about this one?" Casey asked holding up a dress.

"That is really cute. It is shorter so it is light and fun, but it is also classy."

"And they have two different skirt designs and two different top designs on that one," a sales girl pointed out.

Olivia looked at Casey and raised an eyebrow.

"Four different combinations. And there are four of us. If we get them all the same color then they are similar, but each one is unique."

"Then all they have to fight over is who gets what color."

"So get them all the same color."

"Well, that would just be too easy," Olivia laughed. "But now what color do we use?"

"We could take votes from the girls. Next week, when we go shopping. We can bring them here and let them each pick out their dress and together we will decide on a color. And after we order dresses, I can treat everyone to lunch and a mani/pedi."

"You don't have to do that."

"I want to. This is supposed to be your girl time to bond with your wedding party. I cannot think of any better way to bond then over a class of Champaign and an amazing foot soak."

Olivia laughed.

"Or some sparkling white grape juice," Casey suggested realizing that more than half the wedding party was not yet old enough to legally consume alcohol. "And those massage chairs….I am so going to have to get one of those for my apartment," she added.

Olivia moaned softly and closed her eyes.

"That does sound pretty amazing."

"Yes it does. And so does the lunch part. I am starving!"

"You? I'm the pregnant one."

"Lets take a break and we can try again after lunch."

"Now that is the best idea you have had all day," Olivia agreed with a smile.

After a long and exhausting day of dress shopping, Olivia returned home….dressless to make dinner for her fiancé and children.

"Where is everyone?" she asked as she carried a large bowl of salad to the table. "It is awful quiet around here."

"The kids went to the movies. The newest installment of some comic book superhero flick. Dickie has been on the countdown since he saw the advertisement on TV a few months ago. When I got home he was running around here wearing a mask and a cape," he laughed as Olivia smiled. "I gave them some money to go. They'll be back a little later. And I am sure they will all be ready for a big plate of your famous spaghetti. But for now," he said as he leaned forward and lit two candles in the center of the table before dimming the dining room lights, "it is just you and I, my love."

Olivia smiled as Elliot pulled out a chair for her and she took a seat.

"Wait," she said turning to look at him as she placed a napkin in what little bit of her lap that wasn't hidden by her swollen belly, "they took a two week old baby to a Spiderman movie?"

Elliot smiled and shook his head.

"It's Batman. And I didn't say that. I guess technically we aren't really alone," he said standing from the table as Olivia followed him around the corner to see little Isaiah passed out in his swing.

Olivia smiled and laughed a little.

"How did you pull that off?" she asked leaning to raise the receiving blanket up and tuck it around the baby.

"We Stabler men have a lot in common."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah, he likes to drink until he passes out. Just like grandpa."

Olivia laughed and playfully hit Elliot in the shoulder.

"Let's go finish dinner so that I can watch the baby while Kathleen eats. We can listen for him and I will change him and wake him up after we eat."

"Wake him up? Why would you wake him up?"

"To play with him of course! Grandma hasn't got to hold him all day. And if we let him sleep too long now he won't want to sleep tonight when it is bedtime."

"You spoil him."

"I spoil him?"

"Yes, you do."

"You're right, I do," she confessed. "But at least I am not all sneaky about it like you are. Trying to play all tough, when you are just as taken by him as I am."

"Busted," he admitted. "He has me wrapped around his little finger. I know that. He is our first and only grandchild. And had better be for at least a few more years. It is our job as his grandparents to spoil him. But there are a lot of young mothers out there who quickly learn that grandma and grandpa will supply everything the baby ever needs and wants. Then the grandparents end up raising the baby. I just don't want Kathleen to end up like that. She has it in her to be a good mother, the mother that baby deserves. But she is still a kid herself. And she is never going fully apply herself to parenthood if we do everything for her."

"Her baby, her responsibility."

Elliot put down his fork and looked at her.

"I think she is doing a wonderful job. She is young. She is a kid. But she is also a damn good mother who loves her son more than anything in the world."

"I completely agree," Elliot said picking up his glass to take a drink of iced tea. "I am very proud of her. And of him."

"Then maybe you should tell her that."

"Yeah," he agreed with a nod.

After dinner Olivia woke Isaiah up to spend a little time with him. She changed his diaper and laid him on a blanket in the floor as she smiled and cooed down to him. Isaiah just stared up at her trying to focus his big blue eyes on her as he grunted. She opened his little hand and placed a rattle in it, showing him how to hold it with a fist.

An hour later the kids gathered around the table, raving about the movie and Olivia's cooking. Kathleen cradled her baby boy and smothered him with kisses, before handing him back to Olivia and settling into her seat at the table with her siblings.

Olivia ran some warm water in the kitchen sink and sat the baby's bath tub into it. She laid out his things on the counter and tossed a little rubber ducky into the water as well. Then she laid Isaiah on a towel on the counter and stripped off his clothing before lowering him into the water.

"There we go," she cooed softly as she put a dab of baby wash on his wash cloth.

After his bath she picked up the towel and pulled the baby from the water swaddling him in his little terry cloth robe.

"Careful," Kathleen warned from the next room as she carefully observed, "every time I do that he pees on me."

Dickie burst into laughter.

"He peed on you?"

"About four times now," Kathleen confessed. "It is really gross. You should probably get the new diaper on him as soon as possible."

"Thanks for the tip," Olivia replied kissing the baby boy as she quickly dried him off and slipped the new diaper under him. "There we go. Now let's go make you some dinner," she cooed kissing him once more as she held the baby in one arm and began to mix him a bottle with the other.

"It is bedtime little man," Kathleen said softly as she took her son from Olivia. "Thanks, Liv," she said with a hug.

"What about dear old dad?" Elliot asked from his recliner.

Kathleen laughed as she made her way to him.

"Thank you for watching him for me daddy," she said as she placed a kiss on her father's cheek. "It was a nice little break."

"And well deserved," Elliot replied taking his grandson from his daughter to hold him for a moment.

He rocked the boy gently in his arms and kissed him tenderly, before handing him back to his mother.

"Good night buddy," he whispered smoothing his fingertips over the baby's head.

"Good night sweetheart," he said kissing Kathleen and remembering a time when she was the tiny new baby in the family.

"Good night dad," she said turning to head out to her new apartment above the garage.

"Kathleen…."

"Yes?" she asked looking back at him.

"You are a very good mother," Elliot said with a smile. "And I am so proud of you. Olivia and I both are. You are doing a great job, honey."

Kathleen smiled.

"Thanks daddy."

"You're welcome, baby. You call us if you need anything. We are just a few feet away."

"I will, I promise."

Elliot watched as she turned and walked through the kitchen and out the door toward the apartment.

Two days later Casey and Olivia took the girls to the bridal shop to make the final decisions on their dresses for the wedding. As they tried on their dresses Olivia made one last pass over a rack containing a new shipment of wedding gowns. There in the middle, almost completely hidden by the layers of tacky lace and tulle from the dresses around it, was her wedding dress. The one that spoke to her.

"Casey," she gasped as she pulled the strapless ivory ball gown from the rack.

"What's wrong?" Casey asked stumbling out of the dressing room half naked and in a panic.

"This is it. I found my dress!"

Casey tipped her head and looked confused.

"That's it?"

"That's it?" Olivia repeated. "This is what we came here for."

"No, no, no. I mean, that's it? You found a dress?"

"Yes."

"As in you are not in labor or having a heart attack or anything like that?"

"No."

Casey closed her eyes and waited for her heart to return to it's regular beat pattern.

"You scared the hell out of me," she said holding her own dress up around her chest as she made her way back behind the curtain.

"Sorry," Olivia replied nervously as she returned her attention to her dress.

After an hour of carefully considering every color the dresses was offered in, Casey and the girls finally agreed on sage green. Odd color for a wedding, Olivia thought for a moment. But this thought was completely erased from her mind when she stepped out of the dressing room in her gown and stared at it in the mirror. It were as if this dress were made just for her. And as the girls filed in around her to inspect the dress as well, she realized just how well sage green chiffon went with ivory satin.

"Well, this has been a very productive day," Casey said with a smile as she settled into a chair beside Olivia and lowered her feet into the heat of the bubbly water.

"It has. But I think this pedicure is by far the best part. My chunky little swollen feet are loving this," Olivia replied looking down as a the girl began to massage her feet with hot botanical oils. "This feels amazing!" she said closing her eyes and allowing herself to really feel the magic the massage chair was working on her lower back.

"Now all that is left to decide on it the menu for the rehearsal dinner."

"Nope, rehearsal dinner has been changed to a cocktail hour," Olivia replied with a smile. "El has his bachelor party that night and it is just less fuss."

"Bachelor party?"

"Yeah, some of the guys from the precinct want to take him out for a while afterward."

Casey smiled.

"You know they are going to see strippers, right?"

"Probably."

"And that doesn't bother you?"

"Not really."

"Naked women are going to be rubbing up on your man and that doesn't bother you."

Olivia laughed.

"First of all, I do not see Elliot letting anyone "rub up on him" he isn't really into that. I tried to give him a lap dance once…."

"And he didn't like it?"

"Oh, he liked it. He just got all nervous and knocked me off in the floor."

"Oh no," Casey laughed.

"He just isn't like that, I guess. He isn't like most men. I guess it probably stems from having three daughters….well, three and a half. He is too much of a gentleman to really partake in anything like that."

"Maybe so, but those women get paid to do this. They probably make more money than you and I do. I am sure they are very convincing."

"I don't mind because I trust him."

"Him maybe, but those hoes….no way."

"If I truly trust Elliot, then I don't have to worry about anyone else."

"Girl, you are more trusting than I am."

"I am with him, Casey. And he is with me. Neither of us would do anything to jeopardize that. And El is completely family oriented."

"That is true. All he thinks about is you and these kids. He is such a great guy. A real live Prince Charming and I am really happy for you."

"There are still good guys out there. Elliot is living proof," Olivia said squeezing Casey's hand in hers. "And you will find someone….someone amazing and live your happily ever after."

Casey smiled.

"I hope you're right."

"I am always right," Olivia joked and they both laughed.

Three days later, Olivia found herself in the middle of a particularly lazy day. She was exhausted from being so pregnant and seemed to have a slight cold.

"Elliot, I still have so much to do," Olivia mumbled as she stared out the window at the clouds as they began to cover the sky. "This wedding isn't going to plan itself."

"Not today you don't," he replied pulling the thermometer from her mouth and inspecting it. "Back in bed," he ordered pointing at the disheveled mountain of blankets in the center of their bed. "You need a break. Some rest. A couple of days off to get over being sick.

"I'm not sick. It's just a little cold."

"And a little fever. If you are sick, Mia is sick. Right now you are both sick and you are not going to get any better without some rest."

Elliot leaned in and kissed her tenderly.

"Just let me take care of you baby," he whispered softly as he kissed her forehead.

Olivia smiled and took a second look at the bed.

"I guess a nap does sound kind of nice."

"I have to go in for a few hours to give a statement in court, but I'm thinking maybe I could come home early and spend the afternoon curled up in here with you. I can even stop off and bring you back some lunch."

Olivia smiled.

"Well, I guess if I am going to be grounded to this bed the least you can do is spoil me."

"So you agree you'll stay in bed?"

He watched as his wife crossed her arms in front of her and stared him down.

"You throw in a massage and it's a deal," she replied with a smile.

"You drive a hard bargain," he replied kissing her again.

"You didn't think you were the only stubborn on in the Stabler family, did you?"

Elliot chuckled as he pulled back the blankets and straightened them for her. He tucked her in and sat by her side until she had drifted off to sleep once more. He kissed her forehead and brushed a bit of hair back from her face. He smiled realizing just how happy she made him and how since she came into his life even the worst days seemed so much better. He slipped his hand down over the blanket and placed it against her belly as he smiled again, "daddy loves you baby girl," he whispered softly. Then he stood and walked from the room.

Downstairs he grabbed a cup of coffee in the kitchen before heading out the door.

"Dad? You're still here?" Kathleen asked as she made her way to the sink to make a bottle for her son. "You're going to be late for work."

"A little late, yes. Olivia's not feeling well and it took a little convincing to get her back into bed."

"Is she okay? Is everything okay with the baby?"

Elliot smiled and kissed his daughter.

"Mia is doing just fine. Liv has just been going non stop planning this wedding and she is nine months pregnant and has just wore herself out. She has a bit of a cold and is running a low fever. It doesn't seem to be serious, but you might want to keep Isaiah away from her for a day or so, just in case."

"Okay."

"I think she'll be fine in a day or so if she can just get some rest and some fluids. I took her a bottle of water and she fell back to sleep for now. If you see her walking around down here send her back to bed."

Kathleen laughed.

"What?"

"Nothing. Just the thought of me getting to boss her around, it's a little bit amusing."

"Don't press your luck," he warned with a smile.

"I'll look after her dad."

"Really?"

"Yes. I mean it's the least I can do after everything Olivia has done for me….for us. Besides, she's my mother. And that baby is my baby sister. I'm not about to stand around and let something bad happen to them. We Stabler's have to stick together."

"That's my girl," Elliot replied hugging her as he headed out the door. "Call me if either of you need me."

"I will, I promise."

Four hours later Elliot was finally able to break away from the courtroom to call home and check on his wife.

"She's fine dad," Kathleen assured him.

"I ran later than I had intended to. But I'm on my way home now."

"Liv got up a about an hour ago, she seemed restless and bored. I made her some homemade chicken soup this morning, using mom's recipe. It always made us feel better when we were sick. We sat and had lunch together, then she took the laptop and headed back to bed. She's been in there working ever since. I did the dishes and folded the little kids' clothes and got them put away. And now I am working on Isaiah's laundry. For such a little person he sure makes a lot of dirty clothes."

Elliot laughed.

"Yes, honey, babies create a lot of laundry. I'll be home soon, maybe you can help me out with some dinner ideas. I want to make things as easy as I can for Liv at least until she gets to feeling better."

"Well, I have all of the stuff to make tacos. Everyone loves those. And it is quick and easy."

"That sounds great."

"And I have enough soup left over for Liv to have tomorrow for lunch."

"You are taking great care of her, baby. I really appreciate it. I'll be home soon."

"Okay, dad."

Two weeks later while shopping with the kids Olivia began to have contractions. Kathleen drove the younger kids home while Maureen hailed them a cab and called Elliot as they made their way to the hospital.

Elliot got there as soon as he could and Maureen paced the hall while the doctor examined Olivia. She watched nervously as the doctor left the room, then she rushed inside.

"Is it time? Are you having the baby?" she asked looking confused at Olivia putting her clothes back on.

"Not yet," she answered settling back against the hospital bed. "I just have to wait for them to bring me the discharge papers."

"But you were having contractions?"

"He said soon, honey. The baby could come at any time, really. Just not right now," Elliot clarified.

"It's Braxton Hicks," Olivia said.

"Is that bad?"

"It is false labor. Not as scary as it sounds," Elliot replied.

"It is my body preparing for labor. Like a little sneak preview…."

"Oh."

"Of a freaking horror film," Olivia groaned gripping the rail on the bed as she had another contraction.

"Are you sure she isn't having the baby?" Maureen asked with a worried look. "That looks pretty real to me."

Olivia moaned softly rubbing her belly as pressed her lips together.

"I am not dilating. My contractions are too far apart and my water hasn't broke. So they're sending me home."

"You have been too stressed. Working too hard on the wedding plans and up on your feet too much. You need to rest," Elliot said fluffing her pillow.

"Elliot, walking around could really only help me at this point. I am about ready to get this over with. I am exhausted and can't get comfortable. I can't sleep. And now I am having labor pains with out the actual labor. Which means all of this pain doesn't even count. I am miserable. I just want to have her already."

"I know sweetheart."

"Except…."

"Except?" Elliot asked nervously afraid she was in pain again.

"Except, if I have her now I am still out a wedding dress with one week until the wedding. And that would really make a mess of our honeymoon plans. On second thought, it is probably for the better. Stay in there angel, just a couple weeks more," she said patting her belly as Mia kicked.

"Liv, are you sure you're alright?" Maureen asked.

"I'm just ready to go home."

"I'll go see about those papers," Elliot said excusing himself from the room.

The next day Maureen and Kathleen stayed home to help Olivia out and let her rest. Kathleen knew exactly how she felt and wanted to make things as easy as she could on Olivia.

Finally the big day arrived. Olivia woke early and climbed into the shower. She and the girls had their hair appointments in a few hours, but she had a few errands to run before that. Casey stopped by early to pick up all of the dresses and take them to the room at the country club where they would dress for the ceremony.

"Liv, are you ready?" Maureen asked knocking on the bedroom door.

"Come on in," Olivia called tossing the last of her makeup and the box containing her jewelry into a duffel bag on her bed. "Can you take my bag with you?"

"Aren't you coming with us?"

"I'll be right behind you. I need you to take the girls to the hair salon and go ahead and get started. Your father is taking the boys for the morning so we can do our girl stuff. But he is going to have his hands full with Eli so I figured we would take Isaiah with us."

"I can watch him while Kathleen gets her hair done. Where are you going?" the girl asked as Olivia slipped her shoes on and grabbed her keys.

"I just want to get over to the reception venue and make sure they have things ready to go. Your father has had me on bed rest the last few days and I have not been able to touch base with them."

She took a deep breath and placed her hand against her belly.

"Everything okay?" Maureen asked.

"Yeah, I just forgot to eat when I got up and your sister is mad at me. I would forget my head today if it wasn't attached. Did you guys eat?"

"Dickie and Kathleen had fruit and oatmeal, scrambled eggs for Eli and Elizabeth. I had cereal and a banana and I made dad an omelet. I was going to see if you wanted one, but dad said to let you sleep."

Olivia smiled and kissed the girls forehead.

"Thank you. And don't worry about me, I will grab something on the way."

"Are you sure you don't want me to go with you? Kathleen can take Elizabeth."

"I'll be fine," Olivia said with a smile. "Casey is coming back over here and she is riding with me. So you can tell your father I am following his wished and I wont be alone," she replied placing her hand on her baby bump.

"He just worries. About you and Mia. He loves you and wants to take good care of you."

"I know, honey. I love him too. And we are getting married in a few hours, so we have got to get going," Olivia replied shooing her from the room.

"Elliot, can I talk to you for a minute," Fin asked walking into the kitchen.

"Sure. You want some coffee?" Elliot asked while pouring himself a cup.

"Not now, thanks. Listen, I have something I need you to take a look at," Fin whispered with a serious look on his face.

"Alright," Elliot agreed following him out the front door. "But I need to hurry. I still have to get the boys ready," he said stepping quickly to keep up and careful not to dirty his rented shoes.

"I've had patrol keeping an eye on the area. And we really hadn't seen or heard anything…."

"That's great Fin. Maybe the guy really did give up and move on."

"Until last night."

Elliot's eyes shot up and the smile disappeared from his face.

"Someone called in a complaint about some neighbor hood dogs barking. Someone else reported seeing a strange man walking down the street a block over. I had guys in front of the house on alert all night, but they didn't see anything. Not even this," Fin said pushing back the greenery on the side of the house to reveal a shoe print in the flower bed. "We've also got several discarded cigarette butts over here." "You're sure it wasn't one of your guys?"

"Positive."

"It hasn't rained in two weeks," Elliot noted. "Things out here got so dry and the flowers the kids planted were beginning to die."

Fin cleared his throat and looked over their surroundings.

"I set the sprinklers to kick on at 4 am," Elliot continued. "And back off at five."

"Right about the time the complaint came in about the dogs," Fin added. "He was knelt down here watching through this window. What's down here?"

"Our bedroom," Elliot answered.

"I have already sent someone to watch over the girls. I have doubled patrol here and at the country club. What do you want me to do?"

"Don't tell Liv," Elliot said looking up as Olivia walked out of the house with Casey and climbed into her car. "I will make sure Casey doesn't leave her side."

"You don't think this prick would try something at the wedding, do you?"

"He is crazy, Fin. And for whatever reason, my pregnant wife is the object of his affection. Liv has been planning this day, down to the last detail for months now. And I am not about to let this psycho son of a bitch ruin it for her. I will tell her after the ceremony. We were supposed to get a hotel room for a few days….kind of a mini honeymoon. But I think we will have to reschedule. You should get dressed," Elliot said releasing the shrub as it fell back into place covering the footprint.

"I'll wait until everyone is gone and have them make a cast of that. We are gonna get this guy," he said placing his hand on Elliot's shoulder in support.

As they walked back into the house, Elliot's cell phone rang.

"Liv baby, what's going on? Wait what? Honey, calm down I can't understand you. What do you mean the wedding is ruined?"

"Elliot, we don't have a reception hall," she said trying hard not to cry.

"They charged my credit card, what do you mean we don't have a reception hall?"

"I couldn't get a hold of the people the last few days, so I stopped by here on the way to my hair appointment. I just wanted to peek in and see how they decorated it for the reception. Elliot, they got the date wrong on the books! They decorated for the Beckler-Smith wedding, not the Stabler-Stabler wedding," she sobbed. "They got the date wrong! They have ours scheduled for tomorrow!"

"Baby, please don't cry," Elliot said in his most soothing voice.

"Everything is ruined," she said through tears. "We have two hundred guests and nowhere to have a reception!"

"Liv, sweetheart, calm down. I will think of something, I promise. It isn't good for you or for Mia to get this worked up."

Elliot listened as she drew a staggered breath. Things were quiet for a moment and he cleared his throat.

"I have an idea. We will just have the wedding today and ask our guests to join us tomorrow for the reception."

"That is tacky! It is ruined!"

"It doesn't have to be ruined. We had a bit of bad luck. But there is no way I am letting this stop us on our big day. These are our friends we are talking about here and I am sure they will all be understanding. Olivia, it will work out. And at the end of this day we will be husband and wife. It will all be legal. That is all that matters. The party is just a bonus. Honey please don't cry."

"I'm sorry," she said softly. "I should have come down here. I cant believe I messed things up this badly."

"Liv, it was a mistake. You didn't do anything wrong. I wouldn't let you leave the house, so I am more guilty here than you are. It was just an unfortunate mistake. But getting all upset isn't going to make it any better. All we can do at this point is make the best of what we have. We still have each other. We still have our family and our friends, who cannot wait to watch us say our vows today. And this time tomorrow, we will enjoy our reception as husband and wife. A couple years from now we will look back and laugh about this."

"I don't find it very funny."

"You're right, it isn't funny. They messed up big time and I will have words with them. But for right now, lets focus on today. Lets focus on the ceremony and the vows and the husband and wife part."

"Okay," she said softly.

"I love you so much."

Olivia smiled uncontrollably.

"I love you, too."

"And I will be at the country club in just over an hour, waiting for you."

"I will be there. I promise. Nothing in this world could stop me."

"Are you feeling better now?"

"I am. Thank you."

"Good. Can I talk to Casey for a minute?"

"Casey?"

"Yeah, I have some super secret information I need to relay to the maid of honor."

Olivia laughed.

"Okay, but make it quick. She's supposed to be driving me to our hair appointment.

Elliot explained the situation at the house to Casey and made her promise not to let Olivia out of her sight.

After getting their hair done, Casey and Olivia went to the country club and finished getting ready.

"Do you need help in there?" Casey called to Olivia from the other side of the door.

"I'm okay. I'm just fat and slow, that's all."

"Okay," Casey laughed.

Just then Olivia groaned loudly.

"Liv? Are you sure you are alright?"

Things were quiet for a moment, before the door opened.

"Yeah, I just snagged my ring on my dress. But I've got it now. Can you zip me up?"

Casey stared at her for a moment then moved around behind her to zip up the dress. She handed Olivia her bouquet and the girls gathered together as they got ready to start the trip down the aisle.

The girls headed outside and Kathleen handed her son off to a friend before double checking her hair and makeup. She rejoined her sisters and they got into line as the music started.

Olivia sighed and drew a deep breath as Casey gave her a worried look.

"Liv? Is everything okay?"

"I'm just tired. It has been a very emotional day and we are just getting started. I just get tired so easily these days."

"That's understandable."

"Go," Olivia said shifting her eyes down the aisle where her future husband stood. "I am right behind you."

Casey smiled and stepped out as she began her walk through the group of seated guests, following in the footsteps of the other girls.

Olivia groaned loudly and doubled over for a moment, grabbing onto the wall for support.

"Not now, not now, not now," she mumbled under her breath, trying hard not to cry out.

"I believe it's time," Cragen said entering the room behind her. "Casey has just taken her place and the guests are standing. Are you okay, honey?"

"Fine," she gasped trying to catch her breath. "Just nervous, I guess."

"Nothing to be nervous about," he said with a smile as she slipped her arm in his.

Elliot smiled and stared at the most beautiful woman he had ever seen in his life, as she made her way toward him. They stared into each other's eyes and neither of them heard a sound as they repeated their vows. And Casey sobbed as when they said _I do. _

She was his and he was hers and nothing else seemed to matter in that moment. Olivia smiled, finally understanding the real meaning of the word forever. They served the cake on the patio and the country club staff even managed to rustle a makeshift dance floor and a little mood music.

They posed for pictures and everyone was all smiles. Then it was time for cake. Olivia laughed as Elliot smeared it on her face. And then he kissed her. He kissed her like he had never kissed her before. It was the literally the sweetest and most passionate kiss he had ever experienced in his life.

Then she settled her head against his chest and closed her eyes as they slow danced their first dance as a real husband and wife.

"My dream come true," she said softly as she gazed into his eyes.

"It wasn't ruined?"

"Well, it didn't go quite as I had planned. But it worked out perfectly."

"This is the best day of my life," Elliot said softly as he kissed the top of her head.

"Well, I hate to tear you away from the party," she said softly as she looked up at him.

Elliot smiled a naughty smile.

"Here? You wanna do it here? Okay, but we should probably go inside and find a coat closet or something with a door we can lock."

He watched as the smile faded from her face and she wrinkled her brow.

"I think we should go."

"You wanna go home? Okay."

"Not home."

Elliot smiled.

"Baby, I'll take you anywhere you want to go."

"El," she gasped gripping his arm with her hand, "I have a confession to make."

"Yeah?" he said still sure it was something sexy.

"I'm in labor," she blurted out.

"Labor? Now?"

Olivia nodded, unable to speak.

"Right now?" he asked in a moment of panic.

"All day," she said as tears rose in her eyes.

"All day?"

"Well, not all day. But a for a few hours now. I have been having contractions since this morning."

"Baby, why didn't you say something?"

"I wasn't sure it was real labor."

"But you are now?"

She nodded again.

"My water broke while I was putting on my dress."

"We should have gone then."

"It can take hours. And we have worked so damn hard. I wasn't about to let anything stop us from being married. Not even labor," she gasped.

"It's time to go now."

"My labor is progressing. Contractions are about three minutes apart now. This is really it. It's really happening this time."

Elliot raised his head and looked around.

"Maureen," he called as she approached him. "I need you to go pull the car around to the front of the building while I help Liv."

"What's going on?"

"I'm gonna get her to the hospital. It's time to have the baby."

"It's real this time?"

"Yes," Olivia whimpered as thunder rumbled above them.

Elliot tossed his daughter the keys and she ran across the lawn toward the parking lot. Elliot continued to help Liv toward the parking lot ad thunder cracked and rain began to downpour on their festivities.

"Of course!" Olivia said panting as strands of her wet hair began to fall down around her face.

Kathleen grabbed the baby and Dickie carried Eli as they all ran for shelter from the oncoming storm. Once Olivia was safe inside the car, Elliot climbed into the drivers seat and headed for the hospital. Maureen loaded the rest of the kids into the other car and headed back home to wait for the call announcing the arrival of their new baby sister.


	29. 29 In The Name Of Love

_Playing House_

_(Chapter Twenty Nine: In The Name Of Love)_

It was nearing two in the morning and Maureen paced the floor waiting for the phone to ring.

"Relax, it could take all night," Kathleen reminded her from the recliner across the room.

"You're not nervous? This is so exciting. Any minute now our baby sister will enter the world."

"It is exciting. But it can also take a long time. Some women are in labor for days."

"That would be awful," Maureen exclaimed.

"Yeah, it would," Kathleen agreed thinking back to her labor experience. "That is the worst pain you will ever go through in your life."

"But it's worth it, right?"

"Well, no one could convince you of that at the time. You hurt everywhere, especially in places that should never experience that kind of pain. Then you literally rip apart so this tiny little person can come out. Only they don't feel so tiny and little at the time. I was just about to the point if wishing I would just die….until I heard Isaiah's first cries. Then I was so focused on the pain in my heart over having to give him up that I forgot all about the physical pain my body was in."

"I couldn't imagine life without him," Maureen said with a smile leaning forward to kiss the baby in his mother's arms.

"Me either. I know I am young and I shouldn't have gotten pregnant until I was much older….and married. And I know that if a couple had adopted him he would have had a mother and a father that probably could have given him a lot more than I can provide…."

"But there is no way that they ever could have loved him as much as you do. You had this baby inside of you for all of those months. You know him better than anyone. He is a part of you."

Kathleen smiled as her son grunted.

"The best part of me," she agreed. "And I really need to get him back to bed. I'll bed. I'll be back in a minute and we can watch a movie while we wait."

"I'll make some popcorn," Maureen said with a smile.

"One more big push Olivia," Elliot heard the doctor's voice echo in his mind as he stared through the nursery window.

As many times as he had become a father the moment had not been any less magical this time around. He stood there smiling down as the nurse brought over the little pink miracle who held his last name.

"Welcome to the world angel," he whispered in a sentimental moment with tears in his eyes. "Mommy and I have waited a very long time to meet you."

Elliot wiped a tear from his cheek and smiled as he pressed his forehead against the glass.

"Sir," a nurse said as she held the door open to allow him back on the ward, "your wife is settled into her room if you'd like to see her."

"Yeah," he said with a smile carrying a large teddy bear down the hall toward the room. "How's she doing?"

"Good. The doctor gave her some pain medication after delivery, so she'll probably be tired. We just got your little girl cleaned up and I'll bring her to see mommy in just a few minutes."

"That sounds great. Thank you."

Elliot knocked softly on the door as he pushed it open.

"Hey, beautiful."

"Hi," Olivia whispered batting her tired eyes. "Did you see her?"

"For a moment. They just brought her out into the nursery. We have the best looking kid in the place," he said.

Olivia smiled as he took her hand in his.

"Have I told you lately that I love you?"

"Are you hitting on me detective Stabler? I'll have you know I am a very happily married woman," she laughed playfully.

"And your husband is a very lucky man."

"I'm pretty lucky, too."

Elliot leaned in and kissed her tenderly.

"You did great in there. I am so proud of you. And little Mia, too."

"Did you call the kids?"

"I did. I just wanted to call until I knew for sure everything was okay. Kathleen and Maureen were waiting up for the news. They are all going to stop by after church tomorrow to meet Mia."

Olivia smiled.

"And we are gonna miss our own wedding reception. The venue had us scheduled for tomorrow…..well, today now. But I am not looking at discharge until at least Monday afternoon. That is longer than they usually keep women. Mia seems okay. And I told the doctor I am fine, but he is not hearing me. Maybe you could talk to him for me," she suggested batting her pretty brown eyes at him.

"I don't know. It got kind of scary in there for a few minutes. Thank God everything turned out well."

"I'm alright, El. I promise. I felt a little woozy before, but I'm okay now."

"You had an unsafe drop in blood pressure after delivery," the doctor said from the doorway. "I just want to monitor you for a few extra hours and just make sure everything is okay before I discharge you."

"I feel…."

"Fine, I know," the doctor interrupted her. "That's great. And your vitals look really good. I just want to make sure they stay that way."

Olivia looked to Elliot hoping he would speak up in her defense.

"Hey, I'm on his side. Right now the most important thing is that you and Mia are safe and healthy."

"Alright. You're the boss," she finally agreed. "When can I see my baby?"

The doctor smiled and looked over his shoulder as a nurse carried Mia in.

"There she is," he said as the nurse handed the baby girl off to her mother. "Six pounds, four ounces. Nineteen and a half inches long."

"Are you sure everything is okay with her?" Olivia asked nervously.

"She is absolutely perfect."

Olivia smiled.

"Thank God," she replied.

"I'll leave you guys alone," the doctor said heading for the door. "You take it easy and try to get some rest."

"Thank you doctor," Elliot said shaking the man's hand and watching as he left the room. "Liv, I will take care of the reception."

"How are you gonna take care of it? We have already paid. They don't care if we show up or not."

"I'm going to call the place and just tell them I want to reschedule. I will just explain our situation and I am sure they will accommodate us."

"Well what if they don't?"

"Then I will just mention something about taking care of it in court. I am sure they don't want to deal with that. Olivia, they messed up our wedding reception, I don't think they want getting out. It could run their business into the ground. I will just set up a new date and have new invitations sent out."

Olivia smiled in agreement.

"Look at her, El. Have you ever seen anything so beautiful?" Olivia asked looking down at the newborn in her arms.

"Every time I look at you," he whispered staring into her eyes.

"My husband the romantic," she whispered as Elliot kissed her.

Elliot watched as Olivia opened Mia's little hand and placed her fingertip in the palm.

"I love you so much, Elliot."

"I love you too, honey."

"But I don't think I really knew the meaning of true love until the moment I first saw her."

Elliot smiled watching the baby curl up her little foot as Olivia ran her finger over each of Mia's tiny little toes.

"She is pretty amazing," Elliot agreed as Olivia handed Mia to her daddy.

Olivia felt her heart melt as her newborn daughter yawned and opened her little eyes to look up at him.

"Hello sweet girl," Elliot cooed, "I'm your daddy. I think she has your eyes, Liv."

"I think they look blue."

"A lot of babies have a bluish tint to their eyes when they are first born. But hers are dark. Much darker than the other kids."

"I knew that we would have a pretty baby, but I had no idea she would be this adorable. And now it really feels like our family is complete."

"It does, doesn't it? Like she was the missing piece to our puzzle."

"Heck of a way to spend our honeymoon," Olivia sighed as she leaned back against her pillow and smiled as Mia make her little newborn noises.

"I couldn't think of a better way," Elliot replied leaning forward to kiss his wife.

"Well, the words lingerie and handcuffs come to mind."

"Ooh," Elliot replied biting his lower lip. "We will have to reschedule that too."

Olivia smiled and laughed.

"About six to eight weeks from now," she added.

"I should take her now," the nurse said as she approached the bed, "and let mommy get some rest. I'll bring her back first thing in the morning and we can work on breast feeding."

"I can't wait," Olivia said sarcastically. "Good night baby doll," she whispered softly as she kissed Mia and handed her back to Elliot.

"Sweet dreams princess, daddy will see you in the morning."

He kissed his baby girl and passed her off to the nurse. He then turned down the lights and was just about to settle into the chair beside the bed when….

"El," Olivia said softly in the darkness.

"Yeah, baby?"

He watched as she smiled a tired smile.

"Can you sleep with me?"

"I would love to, honey. But there isn't much room and I don't want to crowd you."

"I will make room. I mean technically it is still our wedding night, I would at least like to sleep in the same bed as my husband."

Olivia lowered the bedrail as Elliot slid in behind her and closed his arms around her. She yawned as he studied her facial features closely.

"What?" she asked softly as Elliot smiled.

"She has your nose. And chin. Thank you. For giving me our beautiful baby girl."

"Thank you for making all of my dreams come true," she whispered in response kissing him tenderly.

"Get some sleep angel," he whispered softly. "I love you."

"I love you, too."

The next afternoon the children arrived to meet their new baby sister.

"Baby," Eli cooed standing on his tip toes to peek at the bundle in Olivia's arms.

"That is your little sister," Elliot clarified picking the toddler up to get a better look. "She's pretty, isn't she."

"Baby sleep," he said pointing.

"That's Mia," Maureen to Eli as Olivia handed her the baby girl.

"Oh," he replied, his eyes widening as she moved the baby toward him. "That's Mia," he whispered looking back at Olivia's now much smaller belly.

Elliot smiled and took his son into his arms.

"That's right. Mia used to be inside Olivia's belly. And now she is here with us and in a few days your baby sister is coming home with us."

Eli smiled and leaned in to kiss the baby girl.

"Mia, this is your nephew, Isaiah," Kathleen said holding her son next to her baby sister. "That sounds so weird to say."

"Tell me about it," Elliot said scratching his head.

"She looks so tiny next to him," she said.

"Well, he is older and weighs about six pounds more than she does," Elliot reminded her.

"She is so adorable," Maureen said softly.

"Yeah dad, she is way cuter than any of the other babies in the nursery," Elizabeth added.

"Some of them look like aliens," Dickie commented as Elizabeth giggled.

"That isn't polite," Kathleen said giving them a glare. "They can't help that they have to share the nursery with a Stabler baby. We are all just born better looking."

"It is genetic," Elliot added. "You get your ravishing good looks from your dad."

"I don't know, dad. Mia looks more like Olivia," Maureen said smoothing her fingertips over the dark fuzz on the top of the baby's head.

"Yeah, well, you've got me there," he admitted.


	30. 30 Game Plan

_Playing House_

_(Chapter Thirty: Game Plan)_

Olivia whimpered and pulled her pillow over her head. It was three o'clock in the morning and the sound of two infants screaming at the top of their lungs was almost more than she could bear. She exhaled as she sat up in the dark and yawned.

"I'm up," Elliot said sitting as he felt the bed move.

"I've got her babe," Olivia whispered, her eyes so tired they would barely open.

"No, you got up with her last time. We are supposed to be taking turns. I'll get her," he said standing from the bed.

"She probably wants to be nursed. You aren't lactating, are you?" she asked with a sly smile.

"Alright," he said falling back against the bed. "It is mommy's turn again."

Olivia made her way across the room in the dark and picked up her daughter from the bassinette. She sat on the edge of the bed and raised Mia to her breast. Elliot sat there watching his exhausted wife sway ever so slightly trying hard not to fall asleep as she fed their newborn.

"It has been less than an hour since the last time she woke you up to be fed," he noted looking at the alarm clock on the night stand.

They listened as Kathleen finally got Isiah quietened down upstairs.

"She finally got him quiet," Elliot said softly.

"He only woke up because Mia was crying," Olivia said softly as she looked over at him.

"We have got figure something out or no one is going to get any sleep."

"I know, Elliot. But if this guy has been seen in the neighborhood it wouldn't take much for him to venture into our yard. And I don't want Kathleen and the baby alone in the garage when he does. They are safer in here where we can get to them if they need us."

"I wasn't completely truthful Olivia."

She stared at him for a moment.

"What do you mean?"

"When I said he had been spotted in our neighborhood. I wasn't completely truthful."

"Elliot?"

She tipped her head giving him a worried look as he whispered the rest of his confession.

"Fin found some tracks."

"Where?"

"In the yard. One the side of the house in the flower beds."

"He was here," she said and he could see the fear in her eyes. "Was he in the house?"

"We don't think so. But he was standing right outside our bedroom window at four o'clock in the morning."

"When?"

"The night before the wedding."

"Elliot, why didn't you tell me?"

"It was our wedding day. And you worked so hard to make everything perfect. I wasn't going to ruin it like that. Then Mia was born and I guess it slipped my mind for a little while."

"When we talked about it….before I brought her home from the hospital, you said he had been spotted in the neighborhood. Why didn't you tell me he was in our yard? Looking in our windows?"

"I should have. But we had the new baby here and I didn't want to scare you any more than I had to. If I had told you that you wouldn't have slept any at all the last few days."

He watched as she kissed their daughter and he could see the stars on her face.

"Olivia, look at me."

She turned and looked over at him.

"I am right here. And I am not leaving your side until we catch this bastard. I am going to be right here with you and the kids. We have patrol cars circling the block and everyone in the neighborhood now knows what he looks like. He is not going to get anywhere near here again. I am going to do everything in my power to protect my wife and children. I want you to believe that."

"I do, El. It is just so scary," she said softly standing to place Mia back in her bassinette. "The things this man has done…."

"I know," he whispered standing and closing his arms tight around her and holding her for a moment. "But I promise you, I will never let him hurt you or any of our babies. Come here, I want to show you something."

Elliot took her by the hand and lead her across the room to the window. Olivia stood on her tip toes to look out as he pushed back the dark curtain.

"Across the street. Right over there by the tree. Do see that car?"

Olivia stared into his eyes.

"That's our best man," he said as she looked at him.

"Fin?"

"He has been parked there every night since we realized that guy had been here. And he has guys there during the day, too. And I had him crash on the couch in the living room while we were staying at the hospital with Mia. We are taking this very seriously."

"And this man is the real reason you put up the blackout curtains down here? Not just because of the baby."

"He was the main reason, yes. But I thought it would also help keep it darker down here and she might sleep later in the morning."

Elliot watched as she sat on the edge of the bed and began to cry.

"Baby, I am going to protect you," he said combing his fingers through her hair and squeezing her hand in his.

"What does he want?" she whispered.

"We don't really know that yet."

She shifted uncomfortably for a moment.

"He wants a cop," she said softly. "I saw him do all of those horrible things to those other women. He raped and tortured them before he killed them and he made me watch it all. He would do things to them, sick things. And he would look at me and tell me all of the things he was going to do to me. I had nightmares for months," she confessed.

"Maybe we should go away," Elliot suggested. "Just load up the kids and leave."

"If he wants me, Elliot, he will find me. No matter where we go. Eventually, he will find me. And he won't think twice about hurting you or the kids to get to me."

"He would have to do more than hurt me! And he would have to get through half the police force on our front lawn before he even got near you."

"He is too smart for that. He will wait them out. Eventually they will give up. The department can't afford to pay cops to sit around watching one house when they have an entire city to protect. Eventually they will pull them from the detail and one by one they'll send them back to their regular jobs. He is a hunter, Elliot. Half the fun of the kill is in stocking his prey. He will sit in the shadows and wait. Then when we least expect it, he will make his move."

"Honey, don't think like that."

"I know him, Elliot. I know the way he thinks. They will never catch him. Not until he gets what he wants. Not until he is ready to be caught. If he wants me, he will find me. It is only a matter of when."

Elliot watched as she picked up their sleeping baby in her arms and kissed her tenderly. Olivia held the baby tightly in her arms as she watched her sleep.

"Come back to bed," he said raising up the blankets and patting the bed beside him. "I think Mia should just sleep in the big bed with mommy and daddy tonight."

Elliot took the baby from her mother and placed her on a pillow between them in the king sized bed. He watched as Olivia settled back into her pillow and yawned.

"You should go," she said softly just as he was about to fall asleep once more.

"What?" he asked giving her a confused look.

Olivia couldn't take her eyes off the infant lying between them.

"He is gonna come for me. And when he does it will get dangerous. We can't take any chances on him hurting the kids. You should take them and go somewhere safe. Somewhere far from here."

"I am not leaving you."

"It is the only way, Elliot. He will use them, he will use you and her to get to me. If you take the kids and Fin calls off the detail…."

"Absolutely not!"

"If he calls off the detail, Parker will make a move. And when he does, Fin can be waiting for him. You guys will all be far away and safe from harm. And this would all be over. We can go on with our lives.""

"You expect me to take a three day old infant away from her mother? As you ever so cleverly pointed out, I don't lactate. And she wakes up every two hours to be fed. How am I supposed to do that?"

Olivia thought about it for a moment as she brushed her fingertip through Mia's dark hair.

"She will have to stay with me."

"I am not leaving you alone with a newborn while some crazed mad man is out to get you."

"It isn't safe, Elliot."

"I know," he agreed. "Maybe you are right. Maybe it would be better to get the other kids out of the picture for a while. But I am not leaving you here alone with Mia. You stay, I stay."

"Where could they go?" she asked softly.

Elliot closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

"I think I know a place," he replied staring into her eyes.


	31. 31) Three Days In Hell

**_AUTHOR'S NOTE:_**

I have pulled and reposted this chapter with the intended Author's Note. I apologize for all of the confusion. I am so sorry you guys! I got so wrapped up in trying to get this chapter out that I forgot to include the Author's Note section. I had been talking about this chapter on Twitter with readers and I guess it just slipped my mind that I had not included the update information that I shared with them in the actual update. I have been working on this one for several days and I just could not get it to work out the way I wanted it to. After struggling with it for so long, I finally got it finished around 2am this morning and was excited to get it posted. I'm sorry that it was so confusing for you guys.

To clarify a few things, YES, this chapter is filling us in on what had taken place in the past when Parker abducted Olivia. It is more to give us background on the man they are hunting and to explain why they are all so desperate to catch him and bring him back into custody. This takes place BEFORE Kathy died and she is pregnant with Eli. So, none of the EO relationship/marriage has taken place yet. It is sort of a dream or a flash back. I hope this has made things less confusing. Again, I am so sorry. I guess it was a 2am blonde moment.

Thanks for checking it out! You guys ROCK!

~ Detective Olivia Stabler ~

_Playing House_

_(Chapter Thirty One: Three Days in Hell)_

Olivia moaned rolling her head around and opening her eyes. She hadn't meant to fall asleep again, but she had been so busy at work and was now entering her second straight day without any sleep. That in combination with whatever drugs Parker had shot her up with was making it very hard to hold her eyes open.

The room was dark and cold. Her bare feet stung against the icy concrete floor and blood soaked the sleeves of the blouse she wore where the handcuffs holding her to the water pipes cut into her wrists.

She tried to call out, but with the gag in her mouth the only sound was a muffled groan. She could taste blood in her mouth from the busted lip where he had hit her and felt it running down the side of her face as well.

She studied the room around her trying to figure out where he could have possibly taken her. It a basement of some sort, below an old warehouse down by the water. She had remembered counting the turns from the trunk of her car after he had gagged and bound her. From her apartment, there had been two left and a right. Then they traveled straight for several minutes before taking another right turn and heading away from the sounds of the city. That was all she could remember before she had passed out.

When she woke up, he was pulling her from a different car and carrying her into a warehouse down by the docks. He had her blindfolded at the time, but Olivia was familiar with the area. She could smell the water and recognized the sound of two distinctly different boat horns as they echoed off the steel shipping containers in the yard. She had some idea where she was, now all she had to do was find a way to let someone else know. She whimpered softly as her eyes fell heavy once more.

"Wakey, wakey," a man's voice said and Olivia felt a sharp pain in the left side of her head.

She opened her eyes to see the face of evil staring back at her. Across the room an overhead light flickered making a humming sound that radiated through her brain.

"Good morning gorgeous," he laughed with a devilish smile. "I brought you some breakfast," he said holding a cup of coffee in front of her. "I'll sit that right over here," he said sitting it in the floor just out of her reach. "Now if you are a good girl I might be able to rustle up a donut as well. Isn't that what you cops like? Coffee and donuts?"

Olivia stared at him, but didn't respond.

"Huh?" he asked smoothing his hand over the side of her face as she pulled away from him. "You're shy? That's sweet. I would like to take that gag off so that you and I might have a little talk. But I wouldn't want you to do anything stupid like screaming or yelling out. Do you think you can handle that?"

Olivia moaned as she stared at him.

"See, we have a little problem with communication. I can't understand you with that gag in your mouth. So how about we devise a system? Hmm? Blink once for yes and twice for no."

She breathed heavily, unsure of what he had planned for her.

"I will take the gag out and you will not scream. Do we have an agreement?"

He watched as Olivia blinked her eyes once.

"Good. See, we are making progress," he said reaching forward to move the cloth he had shoved into her mouth when he had abducted her. "There. Better?"

Olivia stared at him, but didn't answer. He shook his head and smiled.

"No need to be rude. You answer me when I ask you a question!" he shouted getting up in her face. "Is that better?"

"Yes," she gasped in a hoarse whisper.

"Would you like a drink?" he asked pointing to the coffee.

"Can I have some water? Please?"

"Water," he said with a nod.

She watched as he stood up and walked across the room. When he returned he twisted the cap off a bottle of spring water and held it to her mouth.

Olivia had never been so thirsty in her life. She drank so quickly from the bottle that the water began to spill down her chin.

"Easy now," he said pulling the bottle back. "You are probably dehydrated. You drink that too fast you will make yourself sick. Where are my manors? Let's get you cleaned up," he said standing. "You wait right here."

Olivia watched as he walked out the door. She shifted and fidgeted in the handcuffs, at one point even biting at them in an attempt to try and free herself.

"And Olivia," he said reappearing for a moment, "you'd better behave yourself or I will gut you."

She stared at him with tears in her eyes as he stepped from the room once more. She drew a deep breath as a tear rolled down her face. She was scheduled to be off work the next two days and until then, there was a very good chance no one would even notice she was gone.

She gasped through her tears of panic, giving into her fear. But only for a moment. She had to get control of herself. She had to hold herself together, she couldn't fall apart now. If no one else knew she was missing, she was going to have to find a way out of this herself. She didn't have time to be scared and she wasn't about to let him see her cry.

"Here we are," he said standing in front of her with a small white box.

She winced in pain as he touched a bit of gauze split in her lip where he had punched her during their struggle before.

"I really am sorry about this. But I wouldn't take the chance that you would yell out and draw the attention of your neighbors. And we both know that you would have."

Next he cleaned the gash in her forehead and applied a bandage.

"If it makes you feel any better, my head hurts too," he said pointing to a fresh bruise where he had head-butted her knocking her unconscious so that he could bind her and carry her to the car.

"What do you want from me?" she asked as he applied a bandage to her head.

He smiled.

"There are so many things," he whispered brushing his thumb over her mouth.

Olivia shifted uncomfortably.

"I have big plans for us, detective. But first, I want to get that partner of yours over here. And let him watch," he whispered staring into her eyes.

He smiled.

"Your coffee, like I promised," he said placing the cup to her lips as she took a sip.

He smiled again and shook his head.

"Oh the things I will do to you," he whispered in a threat.

Olivia kicked her leg up knocking the cup from his hands and causing the hot liquid to go all over his body and splatter in his face.

"You little bitch," he yelled stumbling back away from her.

He ripped a piece of duct tape from a roll, then grabbed a fist full of her hair and yanked her head around until she stared at him.

"I was trying to be nice!"

"Nice would have been leaving me alone! Not kidnapping me and handcuffing me to a drain pipe," she spat back at him before she could catch herself.

He slammed the piece of tape across her busted lip binding her mouth shut.

"If you can't say something nice, Olivia, just don't fucking talk at all!" he growled tasting her hair around once more. "I am so gonna enjoy killing you! I am gonna fuck you, then I'm gonna rip you apart," he said getting up in her face once more. "Or I might rip you apart and then fuck you. I haven't quite decided yet. Either way, that partner of yours is gonna get to watch."

He stood and paced the floor with his back to her for a moment. Then he turned and knelt to talk to her once more.

"Now I'm gonna go get cleaned up. Your friends will be here before long and I want to be presentable. You….you're gonna take a little nap," he said sticking her with another needle and holding her head against the wall until her eyes fell shut and she fell limp once more.

"Olivia."

She stirred a bit struggling to open her heavy eyes.

"Come on," he said tapping his palm against her cheek until she looked at him. "There you are. I've got a little present for you," he said moving toward the door. "Are you watching?"

She sat silently and stared at him for a moment. Suddenly she could hear a woman crying and pleading with Parker.

"Look, Detective. I brought us a friend to play with."

Olivia argued against the tape as she shook her head.

"Well, I'm gonna play. You get to watch," he said pointing at her.

Olivia watched helplessly as he led the young woman across the room. It was clear he had already drugged her and her resistance against him wasn't getting her anywhere. Her hands were tied in front of her and her eyes were covered with a blindfold. When Parker had grown tired of hearing her pleas, he put a gag in her mouth.

He picked the girl up and dropped her onto the table, then he untied her hands. She fought with him, but was quickly overpowered as he raised her arms over her head and tied her to the table. He spread her feet apart and placed them in makeshift shackles he had created himself. Then he pulled a large hunting knife from a drawer and began to cut her.

Olivia cried as the girl struggled and screamed. She didn't want to watch, she didn't want to see. But the first time she closed her eyes, the sick bastard had cut part of the girl's right ear off in warning of what would happen if she closed her eyes.

This was a show. A performance of his and Olivia was his intended audience. After Parker raped the girl, he climbed down from the table and zipped his pants.

Olivia was still crying when he looked her in the eye and winked at her.

"She means nothing, baby," he said leaning to look into her eyes. "But you, you are something special," he said kissing the tape across her mouth.

The girl was laying half naked on the table sobbing, when Parker untied her. He pulled her to her feet and removed her blindfold. She looked at him with tears in her eyes, then shifted her attention to Olivia curled up in the corner.

"I'm gonna let you go," Parker said placing his hand on the girl's face moving a bit of blood stained hair away. "I want you to run. Run and find someone. And I want you to tell them that Detective Olivia Benson is here and she needs their help. Tell them to send Detective Stabler," he said turning to smile at Olivia. "Can you do that?"

"Yes," she said in a shaky voice.

The girl paused only for a moment to look at Olivia, then headed for the door. As she turned to go, Parker grabbed threw his arm around her shoulders and slit her throat.

Olivia cried out from under her tape as tears streamed down her face once more. The cut wasn't deep enough to kill her right away, so she fell to the floor clutching her hands at her throat. Olivia watched helplessly for nearly ten minutes while the girl bled out.

"You'd better hope your friends show up soon. Otherwise I will have to bring a new friend back every day for us to play with," Parker taunted grabbing her arm as she felt the sharp sting of the needle once more. "Sleep tight doll face," he said with a smile as he walked toward the door. "I'll come back and visit you a little later."

It was her fault this girl was dead. She had challenged his authority and he had raped and murdered this innocent woman to prove to Olivia that he meant what he had said. The girl's blue-gray eyes were locked on Olivia as she laid cold on the concrete floor. Olivia pulled her legs into her body and scrunched her toes as the growing pool of blood that seeped from the body approached her. Then she felt groggy again and she couldn't stay awake any longer.

The next time Olivia opened her eyes she was laying in the floor and staring into the eyes of the dead girl. She sat up quickly realizing that she had been moved and was now chained to the lower part of the pipe so that she could lay down. The sleeves of her shirt had been jaggedly cut away probably with the hunting knife and her wounds on her wrists from the handcuffs had been bandaged.

Looking around her, she could see daylight around the edges of the painted glass on the window of the basement room. She had now been missing a full day and it didn't seem as if anyone had noticed. If she didn't think of a way to get herself out of here and soon she was going to be murdered in this room.

"There's my girl," Parker said as he opened the door. "Did you sleep well darling? No? Well I guess I could take you back to my place and you could sleep in the bed with me."

He laughed amused by himself.

"Patience, my love. It will happen. All in due time," he said sliding his hand up the inside of her thigh above the denim of her jeans as she pulled away from him. "All in good time. You must be pretty hungry by now, huh?"

She just stared at him.

"I know you are thirsty. I made a few adjustments here," he said pointing to her chains. "Hope you don't mind. Now if you think you can act like a lady this time, I will free one of your hands so you can feed yourself," he said sitting a brown paper bag on the table.

Olivia sat calmly as he unlocked one side of the handcuffs releasing one arm. He reached to the table behind him and handed her a bottle of water from the bag. Hesitantly, Olivia took it from him. She twisted the cap off and watched as he pulled a sandwich and a small bag of chips from the bag.

"Here you go," he said handing her the sandwich. "It's turkey and swiss. I didn't think you would trust me to make you a sandwich."

She stared at him but didn't respond.

"You've got to eat," he said. "Those tranquilizers I've given you will make you sick if you don't."

Olivia reached out slowly and took the sandwich from him.

"Thank you," she said softly.

Olivia opened the plastic container the sandwich had been sealed in and tore off a bite. As he spoke to her, she watched him write on a roll of duct tape with a red marker.

"You are much better behaved today," he noted. "That's good. Because we will be having company this evening."

"Elliot won't come," she said looking up at him.

"He will. You are mine," he said licking his lips as he stared into her eyes. "But I don't expect him to just give up without a fight. He isn't going to just leave you here with me. And if I know him like I think I do, then he won't be able to resist being here in person for the rescue."

"They don't even know I am missing. I am not supposed to be at work for a few days. They won't notice until I don't come back."

"Oh honey, he has already noticed. I've made sure of that," he said winking at her. "Are you getting excited? I am."

Olivia shifted her eyes to stare at the floor.

"You need to rest up now," he said sticking her with a needle once more, "I'm bringing a friend over to play in a couple of hours and you are gonna need your strength when Detective Stabler arrives."

She shook her head in an attempt to protest, but before she knew it she was out again. That evening when she awoke she wasn't alone. Next to the table in the center of the room was a chair and tied to the chair was another young woman.

Olivia's heart sunk when her eyes fixed on the girl's. She couldn't have been more than nineteen or so. Her dark hair was messed up from struggling with Parker and the dark make up around her bright blue eyes was smeared from her crying.

"Are you alright?" Olivia whispered and the girl began to cry. "Shh. I am going to try to help you, but we have to keep quiet."

Olivia studied the gag in the girl's mouth.

"I know you are scared. Has he hurt you?"

The girl mumbled and shook her head.

"I am a Detective with the NYPD," Olivia whispered. "My co-workers know I am missing and they should be here any time. You just have to be strong, okay?" she asked as her own tears began to fall. "We just have to be strong," she repeated trying to convince herself.

Suddenly they could hear footsteps approaching from outside the door. The girl whimpered in fear. As Olivia shook her head.

"Don't speak to him. And don't fight him. I will try to keep him distracted, so he won't hurt you. Don't let him see that he is getting to you. That's what he wants. He feeds on your fear. Shh," Olivia reminded her as the door opened.

"Good, you're awake. I brought us a new friend," he said cutting the ropes and pulling the girl up from the chair. "What's your name, sweetheart?" he asked lowering the gag from her mouth.

The girl stared at him then dropped her eyes to the floor.

"Now you're both shy? Normally you get two women in a room and you can't get them to shut up. I can't even get a decent conversation started up with the two of you. This here is Olivia," he said moving in behind the girl with the hunting knife. "Don't be rude to our new friend, Olivia. Say hello."

Olivia sat in silence her heart pounding in her throat as he raised the blade to the girl's throat.

"I said, say hello to our guest," he demanded.

"Hello," she whispered.

"Now it's your turn, sweetheart," he said smoothing his hand down her hair as if he was petting a dog.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" he snarled spinning her around to face him. "I said say hello!"

"Hello Olivia," the girl gasped.

"That's better."

"What's your name, darling?"

"Please," she pleaded with him. "I have a baby. A little girl. She's eight months old. I'm all she has. She needs me."

He picked up the girl's purse from the floor and dumped it at her feet. He dug through the wallet until he found her driver's license.

"Chelsey Marks, one one zero seven South Maple Street apartment number four. Well, hello Chelsey Marks."

She blinked at him.

"Hello," she answered for fear of what he would do if she didn't.

"Is this your little girl?"

Olivia watched her nod.

"Melody. Maybe I will just go pay little Melody a visit, Chelsey Marks."

"No, Please!" she pleaded with him.

"At one one zero seven South Maple Street apartment number four."

"I'll do anything you want!"

He rolled his head around to the side to look at Olivia.

"Do you hear that, Olivia? I think our new friend Chelsey wants to play."

He grabbed the girl with both hands and began looking her over from head to toe.

"Wait," Olivia said from behind him.

He turned to look into her eyes.

"I'm yours," she whispered in her best sultry voice. "Me, not her. Play with me," she whispered as she unbuttoned the top two buttons on her blouse.

"Well, I will, darling. But I was waiting until our friend Elliot arrived so we could all play together. Saving the best for last," he whispered with a wink. "She's just an appetizer before the main course."

"She's a kid," Olivia said shaking her head. "She doesn't know what a real man needs. Let me go first. I could show her. Then we could both please you."

Olivia felt her heart pounding so fast she thought it would explode as Parker stepped up into her face and leaned in to kiss her. The thought of his tongue in mouth was almost more than she could bear as she fought hard to hold back the vomit rising in her throat. This man repulsed her. He pulled back and stared deep into her eyes.

"All good things to those who wait," he said as she finally allowed herself to exhale. "You will get your turn. I promise," he replied with a wink.

Olivia lunged toward him as he pushed the girl across the room, but she had reached the end of her chains.

"Don't," she said in a warning.

"I don't quite think you are in a position to bargain or threaten me for that matter. You watch this time. You get to play the next time."

"No, no, please," the girl cried as he grabbed her by the arms and forced her onto the table.

He chained Chelsey down and once again, Olivia was forced to watch as he raped and tortured her. But this time, he didn't stop at once. Five times over the next twenty four hours Parker returned to force himself onto the girl. Each time Olivia cried as she watched helplessly. After the third time, Chelsey didn't even bother crying or pleading with him. She just laid there and let him do whatever he wanted to do to her.

Olivia opened her eyes in the darkness once more. She knew days had passed since he had taken her, but she had no idea how many days. Her eyes were heavy with sleep and her arms and legs were dead weight, she had been drugged once again.

She rolled her head to the side to focus on a muffled noise across the room. The girl was crying. It was a sound that brought much relief to Olivia, because it meant he hadn't killed her yet.

"Hello," Olivia whispered into the darkness as her eyes tried hard to focus on the shadows. "Your name is Chelsey, right?"

She heard the girl sniffle and could see her turn her head to look at Olivia.

"I know you are scared," she whispered. "And I am so sorry he hurt you. Help should be here soon."

"There is no help," the girl sobbed as she began to cry again. "No one is coming."

"They are," Olivia said softly fighting back her own tears.

"I just want to go home," the girl whimpered. "I just want to go home!" she yelled out into the night as the sound of her voice echoed.

"Shh," Olivia warned her. "We have to keep quiet or he will come back."

"I just want to go home," Chelsey sobbed repeatedly.

Suddenly the door flew open.

"It's getting a little loud in here," Parker snarled. "Sounds like someone needs her gag again," he said moving toward the table and slapping Chelsey before gagging her once more.

"It wasn't her, it was me," Olivia replied staring up at him from the floor.

"Now you want to go home, huh? I thought you wanted to play?" he asked sarcastically as he ripped a strip of tape from the roll and slapped it against her mouth forcefully. "I've got one for you, too."

She watched as he filled two syringes at the counter and gave Chelsey a shot. Olivia pulled back in an attempt to crawl away from him as he approached her, but Parker grabbed her by the arm. He put his face up in hers and smiled as he stuck the needle in her arm.

"Good night, darling," he whispered pressing his mouth to the full red lips he had drawn on her duct tape.

Moments later, Olivia had passed out again. The next several hours passed in little flashed. Moments, fragments of time in which she was only half conscious. Olivia opened her eyes to see Parker raping Chelsey on the table again. Her body was so heavy from the drugs that she couldn't even lift her head and had to fight to hold her eyes open.

So she closed them and held them shut as tight as she could, refusing to watch. Refusing to see what this monster was doing to that poor girl again, what this monster intended to do to her.

She couldn't see him now. But she could still hear Chelsey's soft cries of pain and sadness. She could protect her eyes from seeing, but she couldn't keep her ears from hearing, hear mind from knowing or her heart from breaking. If help didn't come soon, this man was going to kill them both.

"Wake up," she heard a whisper as the shock of ice cold water being poured on her face made her eyes shoot open. "It's time to play."

Olivia exhaled and looked around the room. Parker pulled her to her feet and unlocked the shackle type chains around her ankles. He walked her across the room, then reached to turn on the hanging light over the table.

Chelsey sat broken and bloodied in the chair once more. She tipped her head upward to look at them standing over her.

"She is beautiful, right?" Parker asked Olivia. "But not as beautiful as you."

Olivia still felt so out of it from the drugs. She stood there and watched as he pulled Chelsey to her feet and unchained her. The girl stood free of shackles for the first time in two days.

"I have waited and waited," Parker said looking at Olivia from over his shoulder, "but I don't think your friends are coming. So we are just going to have to improvise. Chelsey will play with us until they arrive."

Olivia pulled back as he smoothed his fingertips over the tape on her mouth. Chelsey raised her eyes to meet Olivia's as Parker stepped away from them for a moment. Across the room, the door to their dungeon was standing open just a bit and they could see daylight seeping in from outside.

Olivia mumbled and shook her head knowing exactly what the girl was thinking.

"Did you say something, love?" Parker asked turning around with Olivia's service weapon in his hand.

She shook her head once more.

"I didn't think so."

He moved to stand behind her and began smoothing his hands over her body. He pressed his body against hers and moaned as he touched her. Olivia felt the warmth of her tears as they rolled down her face. This was it. There was no stopping him now. Her head felt heavy from the drugs he had given her and she caught herself actually praying she would just pass out and not have to be awake to experience the things he was about to do to her.

Parker snaked his arm around her waist and pulled her into him as he danced around with her. He buried his nose in her hair and inhaled a deep breath of her.

"God, you smell like cotton candy and cupcakes," he groaned. "I'm gonna eat you up," he said with a smile staring into her eyes. "But I haven't forgotten about you, baby girl," he said reaching out and pulling Chelsey into their little huddle.

He danced around with them for a few moments, then grabbed them both by the hair and pushed Chelsey's mouth to Olivia's tape. He laughed in satisfaction as Chelsey struggled to pull away from him.

Then something strange happened. Olivia watched as he pushed Chelsey hard backwards across the room.

"Go on, go!" he yelled. "You've been staring at that door since I came in here. You want to leave so bad, leave!"

Chelsey stood there with her clothing ripped apart, barefoot staring at him.

"Go on!" he yelled and she turned and ran toward the door.

Olivia tried to yell out to warn her not to run, but the tape covering her mouth stopped any auditable sound and her words just didn't form. The next thing she knew, Parker had placed the gun in her hand and she felt him squeeze her finger to pull the trigger.

One, two, three shots and Chelsey Marks fell dead to the floor. Olivia whimpered and dropped to the ground at Parker's feet as he laughed.

"Great shot!"

She stared up at him with tears streaming down her face as he pulled her to her feet and kissed her once more.

"Collateral damage, babe. She was only going to get in the way eventually. We just stopped that little problem before it started. Now you and I can have a little one on one time. Tonight will be a very special night for us," he promised. "Those other girls, they didn't mean anything. But you, you are something special. It is only right that I make special plans for us. So right now, I am going to give you another shot and you are going to take a little nap while I get things in order for our special night."

Olivia screamed a muffled scream and fought with him as he gave her the shot. Then suddenly she felt groggy and fell asleep again.

Elliot pulled his gun from the holster at his side as he climbed from the car. Cragen looked around at the scattered abandon buildings and large steel shipping containers.

"Are you sure we're in the right place?" Cragen asked.

"This is the last area we were able to pick up signal from her phone. I got the text from her cell yesterday, and this spot is right in the middle of the coverage area. We are close, I can feel it."

"I've got Munch and Fin starting at the other end of the lot. But Elliot, we don't have a warrant."

"You saw the picture, Cap. She was passed out and Parker had her chained to a table. Where ever Olivia is, she needs our help."

"Parker used to work the docks. But it has been years. This place has been shut down for years."

"But he knows his way around here."

"Elliot, right now it is only a hunch that Parker is even involved."

"You saw the way he looked at her. Heard the comments he made to her, the man was obsessed. We should have put him away weeks ago, then he never would have had the chance to hurt her!"

"The DA said we didn't have enough evidence then. We are not going to let that happen again. Look around, but don't touch anything. All we need is something that ties him to this place, something that ties him to her. And we get the warrant before we move in."

The thick blanket of snow that had fallen days before made it obvious that many of the buildings had not had any recent visitors. There were a few tracks here and there, but one building in particular had a beaten path that was practically cleared of snow leading around to a door in the back of the building.

"Elliot, take a look at this," Cragen said drawing his weapon.

"It looks like someone has been spending a lot of time here," Elliot said as they followed the path.

"It could be nothing. Homeless often squat in abandon buildings like this when it's cold out."

Elliot turned to look at him.

"I want to find her just as bad as you do, Elliot. After the last several leads fell through, I just don't want you to get false hope, that's all."

"Hope is all she has, Captain. I won't give up on her. If this lead doesn't pan out then I will keep searching until I find another one and run it down. I will find her. But this is the last area they were able to track her cell phone before they lost it."

"He probably tossed it in the river."

"That means he was here."

"But it doesn't mean she was."

Elliot drew a deep breath and tried to mentally prepare himself for what he was or wasn't about to find. They walked around the building looking things over from top to bottom in search of any clue that might lead them to Olivia. Cragen moved up the ramp to survey the entrance, but the door was locked.

"I've got a window," Elliot said from the other side of the building. "Looks like a basement."

"It is painted black from the inside," Cragen noted leaning in for a closer look.

"This one isn't," Elliot replied kneeling to look at a broken window that had been boarded up.

He knelt down to try and peek between the boards.

"Do you see anything?"

"It's dark. Hard to tell," he said squinting and leaning in closer. "This is the room from the picture. And there is someone on the table," he said pulling at the boards.

Cragen pulled his cell phone from his pocket and called for the warrant. Elliot gave up pulling on the boards and stood up to kick them in.

"Is it her?" Cragen asked as Elliot got his first clear look into the room.

"I can't tell. Whoever it is she's in bad shape."

He ducked down and began to climb through the window.

"Elliot, you'll need back up, we still don't know where Parker is."

"Then you'd better get your ass in here," he said jumping down from the counter and onto the floor.

Elliot's heart caught in his throat when his eyes finally adjusted enough to allow him a look at the gruesome scene. Blood was everywhere. Two girls laid in the floor, seemingly dead and tied to the table in a ripped up shirt and her bra and panties was his partner.

"Olivia," he shouted as he rushed to her side. "She's here," he called out to his boss as he inspected her wounds.

Cragen had barely made it through the window when they heard a call from Fin over the radio.

"You've got company," Fin announced. "Parker just drove through the front gate in a dark grey Honda.

"She's barely breathing," Elliot said removing his coat to cover her frozen body. "We need a bus."

"Fin, we've got Liv. She's pretty bad off. Elliot, we have to get out of here. Now!"

"You have got to be kidding me!"

"Listen to me! Right now we have nothing at all to link Parker to her. We have to let him lead us to her. That way we can put that bastard away for what he has done. If he sees us, if we spook him….it's over. He will never be charged."

Elliot riffled through drawers at the counter then just happened to look up to see a little key hanging on a nail beside the broken window.

"Elliot!"

"I am not leaving without her!" he said unlocking the last shackle that bound her to the table as he slipped his arms under her lifting her motionless body into his arms.

"Stand down," Cragen called over the radio. "Do not let that bastard see you! Let him get all the way into the building then close in behind him. We've only got one change to take him down."

Cragen looked around the room for a moment.

"Over here," he said pointing to an area in the corner of the room that would keep them out of the way while the arrest was taking place. "Sit here with her. And try to keep her warm." He pulled off his trench coat and covered Elliot and Olivia with it. "Fin, go ahead and radio for a bus. We are gonna need them as soon as we get this monster into custody. I'm going off radio," he said then turned the power off and handed it to Elliot.

Elliot held her as close to his body as he could hoping to get her warmed up.

"You hang in there, Liv. You hear me? Help is on the way. Stay with me," he whispered softly, but she didn't respond. "I am here now. We are going to get this monster. I am right here beside you and I am not gonna leave you. I will keep you safe. I promise. I will never let that bastard hurt you again. You just have to hold on," he whispered with tears streaming down his face as he rocked her slowly in his arms.

Elliot stared down at her, his hand wrapped tight around hers and watched for each shallow breath she took.

"We're gonna get you out of here," he said softly pulling the trench coat up more around her face as her head rested on his shoulder.

"He's coming," Cragen whispered pointing to the door as they heard the man approach.

Elliot watched silently as his boss stepped backward into the darkness of the shadows.

"What the Hell?" Parker growled opening the door to find the boarded window had been busted and Olivia no longer strapped to the table. "You won't get far in your panties in ten degree weather, darlin'."

He stepped to the window to look out and that was when Cragen stepped in behind him and put a gun to his head.

"Do not move," Cragen ordered as Munch and Fin entered the room.

"What do you want with me? The little bitch is gone," Parker said with a laugh. "Had a real fire in her, that one."

He chuckled as he licked his lips. All of a sudden Fins fist made a hard popping sound as it struck Parker square in the nose.

"What the fuck? You broke my nose, man! That is police brutality! There are witnesses!"

"Yea," Munch said. "I saw you fall on your face with your hands cuffed behind your back while resisting arrest!" He leaned into Parker's face to whisper, I'll make sure to mention that in court."

"Let's get you out of here before you hurt yourself again," Cragen said leading him toward the door.

"Ambulance is waiting outside. I told them you would be riding with her," Fin said helping Elliot stand with Olivia in his arms. "I thought it would be better for one of us to go alone just in case she wakes up. You are her emergency contact."

"Thank you," Elliot said.

"Watch your step," Munch said looking up from the floor next to the second body as he checked for a pulse. "From the looks of it, they've both been gone for a while."

At the hospital Elliot pace the floor outside Olivia's room in the Intensive Care Unit waiting for someone to give him some answers. Scattered down both sides of the hall were friends and co-workers who also sat worried out of their minds at the thought that they very well could lose Olivia.

Almost an hour earlier they had called a code blue over the intercom and rushed a crash cart into Olivia's room. Elliot tried to get inside, but they closed the door and drew the curtains so that no one could see what was going on inside.

"What's going on?" Elliot asked a nurse as she stepped out of the room and closed the door behind her.

"She stopped breathing and her heart stopped. But they got it going again. It is still pretty touch and go. I don't know much more than that. The doctor will be out to give you more information on her condition soon."

"They have been saying that for over four hours," Fin said.

"I'm sorry. I just don't have anything else I can tell you. If I find anything out, I will let you know," She assured them.

Elliot made a growling noise and pounded both fists against the wall. More than anything he hated being in situations like this and feeling so damn helpless.

"Hang in there man," Fin said patting him on the back. "She's tough. Hell, she's tougher than any of us. If anyone could pull through something like this it's her."

"It's my fault, Fin."

"Now that has got to be the dumbest thing I have ever heard you say. How could any of this possibly be your fault?"

"It is. We had worked late that night. I was going to stay in the city. Olivia had asked me to stay at her apartment with her. I have done it a million times. Shit, I have my own pillow and blanket for the sofa. But she was supposed to be off the next few days and I needed to be up and back into work really early, so I turned her down to crash in the cribs. I knew if I slept on her couch she would end up coming in the next morning to help me. She had been working nonstop and really needed some time off. If I had stayed with her I would have gone home with her and I would have been there. I never would have let that bastard grab her."

"But he did. And you can't change the past. None of this is your fault."

"Yea, he did. It took us a day and a half to even realize she was missing. If he hadn't texted that picture of her from her cell phone, we never would have found her, Fin."

"Let me ask you something. How often do you talk to Liv on her days off?"

"I don't know. Often. Unless of course I know that texting or calling her would just lure her back into work."

"My point exactly. You were trying to look out for her. Look, I realized that night that she had gone home with a file I needed. But I thought about it and decided I wouldn't call and interrupt her. I decided just to wait and get it back from her on Monday. You know how bad I've been kicking myself for that one? If I had called her she may have turned the car around and come back. If I had stopped by her apartment on my way home, I may have caught the guy in the act and been able to stop him. Or at the very least have realized she was missing moments after he abducted her. So if it's your fault, it's my fault, too. But the truth is, neither of us is to blame. Parker is a psycho who had his sights set on Olivia. And we did everything that we could to get her back. That bastard is sitting in a holding cell and he will be prosecuted for this. For what he did to her and to those girls. All we can do now is pray. And I have done that about every thirty seconds since we found her."

Elliot looked up at him with a nod.

"Thanks, Fin."

"Elliot Stabler," the doctor said stepping from the room and looking at the chart.

"Yes?"

"Could I speak to you privately for a moment?" he asked holding open the door for Elliot to enter.

"Is she going to be alright?"

"I am afraid at this point things could really go either way," the doctor said pulling back the curtain from around the bed so Elliot could see Olivia.

Elliot moved to her side and placed his hand in hers. He closed his eyes tight and prayed she would squeeze his hand and give him a sign that everything was going to be okay, but she didn't react to his touch at all.

"We are still working to stabilize her BP and I can hear fluid in her lungs when she breathes. She was hypothermic when they brought her in and though we have gotten her body temperature back up where it should be, we still have to watch her for signs of pneumonia."

Elliot smoothed his fingertips up the bend of her arm, then noticed the matching bruises on the other arm as well.

"What is this?"

"He has blown practically every vein in her arms. He's been shooting her up with something to keep her sedated. Some kind of horse tranquilizer and this last dose was a hot shot."

Elliot raised his eyes to look at the man.

"Pardon me. It is a term we use when someone is injected a potentially fatal dose of drugs by another person."

"I am familiar with the term. I'm a cop. We both are. Olivia is my partner. Please tell me she is going to be okay."

"I think we have managed to flush most of the drugs from her system. She'll probably sleep for several hours. She may not wake up for a few days and at this point things could really still go either way. He over dosed her. And I am certain that if you had not found her and brought her in when you did, she wouldn't have made it through the night. The drugs are so heavy in the system that she cannot stay awake. After a few hours they begin to slow the heart and paralyze the lungs. She would have just stopped breathing in her sleep."

"But she does have a chance?"

"She does. We have her on oxygen to make it a little easier for her to breathe and we will keep her in the ICU for the next few days. We will be watching her closely. Most of her wounds are superficial. She had over a dozen shallow cuts covering her body. Most of which should heal up with very little scaring. And the rape kit came back negative for signs of sex. If she can make it through the next twenty four hours, I'd say she has about a ninety five percent chance of making a full recovery. Of course I will want to keep an eye on her for any signs of long term damage to her major organs. If you hadn't brought her in when you did, she would be dead right now. You saved her life today."

"Now if we can just keep her alive," Elliot said exhaling slowly.

"I'll tell you what. We don't normally allow visitors for more than a few moments at a time in the ICU. But this young lady has been though quite the ordeal over the past few days. If you promise not to disturb the other patients, I will let you sit in here with her through the night."

"I'll be quiet. You won't even know I am here, I swear."

"That chair folds out into a bed," the doctor said pointing to the corner of the room. "This way if she wakes up through the night there will be a familiar face here with her and she won't feel so alone. There is one other tiny detail I need to discuss with you."

"Okay."

Elliot watched as the doctor pulled Olivia's chart from under his arm and opened it up to show Elliot.

"Some of the doctors on this floor are interns, right out of medical school and they seem to have made a bit of a mistake."

"What kind of mistake?" Elliot asked.

"It seems your friend here is a DNR. The doctor that was in the room when she stopped breathing jumped the gun a bit on calling for a crash cart. I am sorry about this."

"I'm not! That mistake just saved her life."

"See, here is where the problem lies. Your friend signed a paper stating that she did not want us to take any extraordinary measures to keep her alive. Now while she is breathing on her own I have provided the oxygen simply to make her more comfortable. She is on no form of life support, but the use of the crash cart did violate her wishes this could be a liability for the hospital."

"We are not going to sue," Elliot assured him.

"Would you be willing to sign a waiver stating this?"

"Yes. And I would also like to thank the doctor who ordered the crash cart," Elliot said with a smile.

Two days later Elliot sat beside Olivia's hospital bed. She still hadn't woken up, but her vitals were much stronger and she had been moved out of the ICU ward and into a regular hospital room on another ward. He sat flipping channels on the television as a nurse opened the door and stuck her head inside.

"Mr. Stabler, you have a visitor," she said softly.

"She has visitors?" Elliot asked pressing the power button and laying the remote aside.

"No sir, she doesn't. You do," the woman clarified. "A woman who says she is your wife."

"My wife? Yes. Go ahead and let her in. Thank you."

Kathy stepped into the room shooting a scalding glare back at the girl as she did. She placed her palm under the swollen bulge of her pregnant belly as she made her way toward him.

"It is good to see you," Elliot said placing a hand on each side of her face to kiss her tenderly.

"I brought you some lunch."

"Thank you, honey," he replied peeking into the brown paper bag.

"How long are you gonna do this, Elliot? You heard that doctor, she may not ever wake up. Are you just going to sit here day in and day out forever?"

"I can't just leave her, Kathy. I won't."

It was obvious he was in a bit of hot water with his loving wife.

"I understand someone should be here when she wakes up, Elliot. I just don't understand why that someone has to be you. Cant someone else sit with her for a few days?"

"She doesn't have anyone else. And I am listed as her next of kin. I am the only one who can make medical decisions for her right now. It really needs to be me."

"Of course it does."

"What does that mean?"

"It means that you spend more time with Olivia than you do with your own family. That's what it means," she snapped as she headed for the door.

"Kathy, wait." Elliot chased her out into the hall and stopped her in front of the door. "I am sorry. But I wouldn't be here if it weren't important. She is doing much better right now, but she could still take a turn for the worst and I need to be here so that they can easily reach me if anything happens. Olivia needs me."

"I needed you," she said raising her voice at him. "You missed my appointment today! The appointment we have rescheduled four times just so that you could be there!"

"Kath, I am sorry. I am so sorry and I will make it up to you, I swear."

She just glared at him and shook her head.

"Do you have any idea how tired I am of hearing you say that?"

"I know. Baby, I know. And you're right. I have not been there nearly as much as I should have been. And I am going to start spending more time at home I promise."

"Yea?"

"Yea," he said hugging her and leaning in for a kiss. "Just as soon as we get Olivia into the clear."

Kathy made a growling noise and pushed him away from her as she turned to storm off.

"And by the way," she shouted back at him, "it's a boy!"

Elliot closed his eyes and laughed just a little. He knew that pregnancy hormones were getting the best of his wife at the moment and she had been disappointed that he hadn't been there to find out the sex of the baby. But he also knew that Kathy was not as mean and cold hearted as this argument had made her sound.

"Wow," he mumbled as he stepped back into the room and turned to close the door.

"It's a boy," he heard a soft voice say from behind him.

"Liv?" he turned to see her blink her dark eyes at him.

Elliot couldn't help but smile at the sight of her smiling back at him.

"Congratulations," she said softly.

"Thank you," he said with a smile as he moved to her side. "How do you feel?" he asked brushing a bit of hair back from her forehead and pressing the call button for the nurse.

"Like I have the worst hangover in the world," she whispered. "And I am so tired."

"That is from the drugs. The doctor said they got most of them out, but you'll probably feel that way for a few days. Sorry about all of the yelling."

"You really sat here with me all of that time?"

"Yea. I wanted to be here when you woke up."

"Kathy is really angry with you."

"She'll get over it. She always does."

Olivia smiled.

"You should send her flowers. With a balloon and card that say you are sorry."

"Flowers?"

"Girls like to get flowers from their guy."

"I'm not sure this is something flowers can fix."

"No. But it's a great place to start. She just needs to feel like she is a priority, Elliot."

"You were my priority. Being here with you….this was a life or death situation. And either way it went I was going to be standing right here beside you. I wasn't going to let you go through this alone. She will come around and she will understand that. Right now I think she is just so busy being angry because I let her down again that she can't see anything else. She just needs a little time to cool off."

Things were quiet for a moment as the nurse came in to check her vitals, then left again to page Olivia's doctor.

"Liv, I am so sorry," Elliot said sitting on the edge of the bed and taking her hand in his. "We got him. And there is no way he is going to get away with what he has done to you and those girls."

"Elliot, did he…?" she paused for a moment as tears filled her eyes. "The last few days have been one long drug induced nightmare. And while it is probably best that I don't remember some of the things that happened….I need to know," she whispered in a sob.

Elliot shook his head.

"The doctor said your rape kit came back negative. I don't know how, or why he held you for so long without…." He paused catching himself just before letting it slip out. "But I thank God that he did."

He leaned forward and raised her hand to his lips.

"You should try to get some rest."

"Elliot," she said softly. "Thank you for not giving up on me."

"Olivia, I will never give up on you," he replied choking back tears once more.


End file.
